The Farmington Friend

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1 The Farmington Friend Margaret Webb, Pastor VOLUME 69 NUMBER 7-8 FARMINGTON, NY July-August 2014 Let s Be Star Throwers There is a story about a star thrower, a person on the beach at sunup throwing back to the lifegiving sea starfish. The beach is littered with many, many starfish, and this person is picking them up one by one and throwing them back beyond the surf. Another person approaches and asks, What are you doing? The star thrower replies, I am throwing back the starfish so they have a chance at life. The questioner replies with a bit of disdain, You can t save all of them; it is futile. It doesn t matter. To which the star thrower replies, holding a starfish and preparing to send it on its way, It will matter to this one. By raising puppies for Guiding Eyes for the Blind, we are in ministry with the star thrower. It may not matter in the greater scheme of things, but it may matter to someone. Will we eradicate blindness in our lifetime? Not by raising puppies, but will we give a sense of independence to someone? Perhaps. We sent Admiral back to Guiding Eyes hoping he would be a guide dog, but Admiral had other plans. He is not a Guide, he will not help someone with their independence at least not directly, but is his explosives detection work life-giving, life-enhancing work? Oh, yes! That is why we raised him: to make a difference in our world. When I walk Baltic through a store or take him to a restaurant or bring him to Meeting, he is (generally) greeted with smiles, and adults and children are (usually) happy to see him and talk about him. Is Baltic a star thrower? Oh, yes, he certainly is because he makes a difference in the lives of folks who meet him. Baltic doesn t care if the person is a theist or atheist or something in between. All Baltic cares is that they have gentle hands and kind words. I, of course, do not know if Baltic is going to be a Guide, a dog for an autistic child, an explosive detection dog, or a family pet. It is not for me to determine. What is my job is to raise a fine pup. We can learn a great deal from dogs: what should it matter to us if a person is a theist or an atheist or something in between? All we need to worry about is that they have gentle hands and kind words. And shouldn t our concern be that we treat each person we meet with gentle hands and kind words? We should all strive to be star throwers. Cyndi Marvin

2 Margaret s Musings I recently saw a quote that was shared with me on Facebook. It said, And God said, Love Your Enemy, and I obeyed him and loved myself. The quote was attributed to Khalil Gibran and I honestly don t know anything more about it but it has spoken to me in the last several weeks. We are taught in scripture to, love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself (Luke 10:27). This clearly suggests that loving ourselves is part of how we love our neighbors and even part of how we love God. I think that sometimes people worry that loving themselves is the same thing as conceit, pride or narcissism. I think sometimes our society teaches us that self-love is the equivalent of being selfcentered. This is far from the truth. God names us as good (Genesis 1:31) and we are taught elsewhere in scripture that we are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). It is important that we realize and internalize this goodness how astoundingly glorious we were created to be. This doesn t have to be a prideful act and it doesn t involve being self-centered. It is about claiming our worthiness and seeing ourselves as fully humans. It is difficult to extend love to others if we cannot even extend it to ourselves. It is difficult to love our God fully if we cannot love ourselves fully. Self-love is about seeing and acknowledging our flaws and our faults but still seeing that we are worthy of love, respect, kindness and care. We can and should always be working to be better working to live into God s teachings. We should always be working to love more, to respond to the world with more compassion and we should always be working for justice. I am not suggesting that we should just sit back and bask in our own glory but all too often I see people disrespecting themselves and disregarding their own worth. I think women are particularly prone to self-hate and struggle to love themselves and I think this is a shame. We are fearfully and wonderfully made. Let us love our enemy, even (or especially) if that enemy happens to be our own self-image. AUGUST 2 Dianne Aldrich 2 Richard McClurg 3 Paige Baker 4 Floyd Sheldon 4 Marsha Tillson 5 Evelyn Sadler 7 Lindsay Rourke 8 Debra DeJaeger 11 Roberta Watchorn 12 Gordon Smith 13 Natalie Santy 15 Sophie Grace vander Velden 17 Scott Parker 21 Anne Ceddia 21 Dick Nettle 22 Donald Baker 23 Carrie Baumgartner 26 Henry Kula, Sr. 26 Karen Parker 29 Christopher Santy 29 Carol Nicholson Happy Birthday! FARMINGTON FRIEND STAFF Editor: Keith Egnor Co-editor Jeff Parker Front Page: Kathy Dudarchik Society Editors: Margaret Baker, Jeanette Bay Treasurer: Scott Parker Address Labels: Susan Sharp Mailing Staff: Gerry McClurg (co-clerk), Dick McClurg (co-clerk), Pat Ford (copying), Evelyn Sadler, Margaret Hartsough, Lloyd Hartsough, Margaret Baker, Linda Doyen Leave articles in Meetinghouse folders or mail to the editor by the 2nd Sunday of the month. Mail: 193 Howell Street, Canandaigua, NY egnork@yahoo.com Telephone: May Treasurer s Report Income: $4, Expenses $5, Cash Flow: ( $860.69) SEPTEMBER 1 Dorothy Johnson 1 Shawn Sadler 2 Kathleen Carroll 3 Gardner Soule 3 Alyssa & Dominique Kimball 6 Kayli Nicholson 6 Charlie Nettle 9 Cole Parker 9 Willy Baumgartner 14 Diana Van der Velden 14 Robert Baumgartner 16 Linda Doyen 17 Don Kutniewski 17 Margaret Baker 18 Meghan Congdon 18 Marilyn Padgham 21 David Stone 22 Aaron Ford 22 Elizabeth Lee 25 Suellen Richmond 27 Alan Sadler 28 Eddie DeJaeger, Sr. 30 Karen DiDomenico

3 Society Thanks! Thank you to Dorothy Tunison, Rev. Verne and Lillian Schattner, Kathleen Faux, Frederick and Mary Allen, Mr. & Mrs. Lloyd Hartsough and Sharon Hoover for their generous contributions to The Farmington Friend. Thank You Dick and Gerry McClurg and their daughters, Colleen Horan, Carol Rourke and Kathy Dudarchik, would like to express their thanks for a successful and enjoyable reception to celebrate their combined 80 th birthdays and Diamond Wedding Anniversary. Thanks to everyone who came to share their special day and those who helped to make the reception possible. The beautiful flowers, the Hospitality Committee and those who helped them with the food, setting up and cleaning up allowed our family to enjoy spending time with family and friends. 3 other cooperating groups. The program will be held at the Farmington Friends Meetinghouse, 187 County Road 8, Farmington at 2:00 PM. USFW Meeting September 16th The September USFW meeting will be at Barbara Popenhusen s at 1:00 PM on Tuesday, September 16th. Barb will bell us about her recent trip to Ireland. RE Teachers Sought Religious Education is looking for Sunday School teachers for next year. This is a great opportunity to get to know and work with the children of the meeting. Whether you can do a couple of weeks, a month, half a year or the whole year is OK. Nursery through 6th grade meet on the 1st and 3rd Sundays of each month. If you are interested in helping please contact Anne Gilson or Margaret Webb. Upcoming Events Ministry & Counsel August 12 Ministry and Counsel would like to invite all Friends who regularly attend the unprogrammed worship service (or those Friends who might be interested in attending the service in the future) to our business meeting in August. It will be held at 6:30 PM on Tuesday, August 12 at Annaliese Parker s home. The agenda for that night will be a discussion as a community as to how best to welcome and integrate our newly formed unprogrammed worship service into the life of the Meeting. Quaker Meetinghouse Program August 16th: Declaring Equality: The Call Continues Attorney and activist Nadia Sharam discusses her Declaration of Muslim Women s Rights with Elizabeth Cady Stanton, as portrayed by Dr. Melinda Grube. Co-sponsors: Friends of Women s Rights Park; Women s Interfaith Institute. Presented with support from the New York Humanities Council and MOSTLY MUSIC CDs The CDs from this year s Mostly Music are available. There are two versions. One is called Farmington Friends Choirs Service Celebrating the Life of Jesus. This CD is the music and the readings connecting the service together. The other CD is just the music from the service and is called Farmington Friends Choirs Celebrating the Life of Jesus. The cost of the CD for non choir members is $ Please add $2.00 if we need to mail the CD to you. We hope that you will want to share this special worship service with us over and over throughout the year and that it will bring to you the peace of God s love. If you are interested in a copy and are unable to pick one up in the vestibule at church, please call Marion Cole at , or her at ncole2@rochester.rr.com.

4 Committee Minutes & Notes Farmington Friends Monthly Meeting Minutes June 22, 2014 Farmington Friends met for Monthly Meeting at the rise of Meeting for on Sunday June 22, 2014 with 23 present. Clerk, Marion Cole, opened the meeting by reading First Corinthians 13:4-8; 1 Corinthians 13:4-8; 4 Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; 5 it is not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never ends; as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. This was followed by a time of silence and prayer. Health of the Meeting: Nance Simkin continues to improve. Marion Milne is recovering from and infection. Ruth Wolf is doing well and is in good spirits. Hannah Sharp will be having surgery on her hip this week. Please hold these Friends in the light and in your prayers. Letter to Margaret Webb s Recording Committee: The clerk read a letter which was approved by the Meeting. This letter, which follows, will be sent to the members of the committee established to oversee Margaret s recording as a Quaker Pastor. June 23, 2014 Dear Members of Margaret Webb s Recording Committee, We, the members of Farmington Friends Monthly Meeting, would like to share with you our thoughts on Margaret s ministry. We are feeling greatly nurtured by Margaret s spirituality. Her depth of spirit and ability to lovingly and enthusiastically share that spirit has led to a wonderful revitalization of our Meeting. Margaret s 4 knowledge and love of Quaker history, process, and worship has inspired and guided us on our journey to strengthen our Quaker roots. The Sunday school, which was waning, has seen a great resurgence in attendance with our teens even requesting more meeting time than our Religious Education Committee had planned. Margaret co-teaches that class and they are very excited about it. Her children s messages bring the children rushing to the front to be part of her stories, which the adults also enjoy. The Sunday morning Meeting for is well paced with scripture, prayer, inspiring and insightful messages, and unprogrammed worship. It is a time of worship that is both moving and challenging. We leave each Sunday renewed and refreshed in our love of the Holy Spirit. Margaret is very conscientious about visiting the shut-ins and sick. They look forward to her coming and appreciate her caring and understanding manner, as we all do. Margaret is truly walking in the light and sharing that light with us at Farmington Meeting. We feel that her gift of pastoring (vocal ministry) is a God given blessing. And, we pray that you will find it in your hearts to see her gift and recognize it by recommending her recording at New York Yearly Meeting s 2014 Summer Sessions. With the Love of the Holy Spirit in our hearts, Farmington Friends Monthly Meeting Marion Cole, Clerk Pastor s Report for Monthly Meeting June 2014 Pastoral Care: Since our last Monthly Meeting I have continued to visit all of my regulars. I have also continued to meet regularly with a member of the meeting for counseling. I have found that the pace of my pastoral care work has slowed somewhat. I have been aiming to make 2-3 pastoral visits per week (and allowing myself to leave it at 2

5 per week). I feel that everyone who needs to be visited is visited but that my weeks don t include quite as many visits. I continue to make have a strong and positive connection with the youth of the meeting and I try to be pastorally available to the meeting as a whole on Sundays and during other gathering times. I continue to make pastoral phone calls each week and communicate by , text and Facebook. Preparation and Leadership: I have been blessed this month to participate in several different types of services. I loved being part of Mostly Music Sunday. I found it so inspiring to work with Marion and Jean and to think creatively about using music as a focus point for our worship time. I really loved choosing scripture for the service and working to tie together the story of Jesus life and ministry. I also loved hearing from the youth and seeing how much work they have done this year and how they have developed in their faith. I think Youth Sunday is a powerful thing. It teaches the young people of our community that they are valuable and have a place and voice and that they can also have an active role in worship I think it teaches them to be active participants in faith and not just observers. I also think it is so healthy for the rest of us. It reminds us that worship is about the process and the sense of closeness to God and not just about every word and action being perfectly acted out. I think sometimes it is easy to get stuck thinking about doing everything the right way, and we forget that no matter how messy worship is it is still right if it is focused on God. June 8 th is the traditional celebration of Pentecost, so Sunday June 15 th I focused on the story of Pentecost and how we are all equally empowered by the Holy Spirit. As always I gladly welcome feedback and suggestions about our worship time together each week! Committee and Other Responsibilities: This month I have put in extra time working on the website. I have spent time collecting, resizing and uploading photos to the website. I think our website is looking wonderful! This month I also attended Peace and Social Concerns (our last meeting before the fall) and I have continued to attend RE and I also attended Music committee and M&C as usual. I am have been working at my church office 2 or 3 days a week but I have been mindful to regularly change up the days 5 and times that I am there and also keep the building locked when I am alone. Treasurer s Report: May 2014 Income $4, Expenses $5, Checking Account Balance as of 04/30/14 $14, Checking Account Balance as of 05/31/14 $13, Ministry and Counsel: Farmington Friends Ministry and Counsel June 17, 2014 Farmington Friends Ministry and Council met June 17, 2014 at 6:30PM at the home of Sue Sharp. Present: Willie Bontrager, Clerk; Marion Cole, Pat Ford, Annaliese Parker, Carol Nicholson, Sue Sharp, Linda Doyen, Margaret Webb. Pat brought the opening-excerpts on worship from Ben Pink Dandelion's "Celebrating the Quaker Way". Health of the Meeting: Hannah Sharp will be having hip surgery June 24 at Strong Memorial Hospital. She will be home after a 5 day hospitalization, then on crutches for 12 weeks. Ann Ledgerwood continues to have concerns about eye problems. James Gardner, Diana's cousin, fell recently suffering a head injury requiring stitches. His roommate who he was close with passed away which has been very upsetting to him. Nan Simkin is much improved, up walking and enjoying good conservations. Ruth Wolf continues to be in good health, good spirits. We hold all these Friends in our prayers. Andrea Doyen Bogin has recently accepted a position as director of a school associated with Rockland Community College. Rachael Desmond has passed her RN Board exams and will be working in the Washington DC area. We rejoice with these young women as they begin new journeys. Review of May Minutes: Clarification of items in the minutes was made. Old Business: Clerking Workshop-Carol Nicholson will be contacting by Friends in the area to determine interest in a clerking workshop, asking for day and time suggestions. Also Art Larrabee will be contacted to see if he would be willing/available to conduct a workshop.

6 M&C Retreat July 12, 9-1. The committee will meet to prepare a job description for the committee as recommended by the Pastors and Elders Retreat held recently at Powell House. We will begin with a shared breakfast meal and bring a bag lunch. New Business: The committee spent some time sharing thoughts and impressions of the Call Monthly Meeting that considered the M&C minute on silent worship at Farmington. The Clerk of the Meeting was commended for her leadership during the Called Meeting. Margaret will be talking with members about their continued concerns regarding silent worship, including talking with the group that currently meets each Sunday morning. M&C will carefully consider all these concerns. M&C is concerned about the slow response of NYYM to Margaret's recording as a Friend's Pastor. A letter was read to the committee regarding this concern and with committee support and approval the letter will be brought to Monthly Meeting for consideration. We did some planning for worship leaders during Margaret's maternity leave considering asking guest speakers for some Sundays and members as leaders on others perhaps several sharing on a Sunday. Margaret is preparing a report on members that she regularly visits-how best to contact them, what times are more convenient etc. so these visits can continue during her time away from the meeting. Margaret again ed her pastor's report to committee members prior to the meeting, she plans to continue this in the future. After careful consideration, Margaret tells M&C that she is not planning to attend Yearly Meeting Summer Sessions. M&C supports her decision and will let appropriate leaders in NYYM know of our support for this decision. The next meeting will be August 12, 2014 at 6:30pm at Annaliese Parkers, Margaret will bring opening thoughts. Willie Bontrager, Clerk Peace and Social Concerns:! The date for the Alternatives to Violence Workshop was confirmed as being Sunday October 5, Missions Committee: No Report House and Grounds: The Fire Marshall s inspection on June 2 nd resulted in a few small infractions which have all been addressed and corrected. These adjustments will be inspected again on July 7, The Webbs have asked and received approval of the Meeting to build a wooden swing set in the back yard of the parsonage. Religious Education: Religious Education June 4, 2014 Margaret opened the meeting with prayer. Present: Karen Parker, Gail Sheldon, Margaret Webb, Anne Gilson and Ellie Ellingham. Helper: Sue Ford and Dianne Aldrich Youth Sunday, June 8. Plans were discussed and finalized for the program. Sue Ford has worked on the bulletin and listed all the Sunday School children by class. It was decided by the RE Committee to practice for the service in the Educational wing. Silent is now being observed from 10:15 to 10:45 Sunday mornings in the Meeting room and we need to be considerate of this time and help all groups to be mindful and respectful of each other. Sundae Sunday also June 8. Everyone is invited for ice cream after the Youth Program. Gail-toppings, cherries and whip cream Anne-ice cream and bowls Karen-caramel and strawberry sauce Ellie-chocolate sauce Margaret-blankets to sit outdoors if desired Karen and Cadi Kenya trip It was Wonderful and very busy. In terms of accomplishments, it was the best trip yet. For the first time, the team was able to treat malaria in a village they had not been able to before. RE encourages Karen to contact Peace and Social Concerns Committee to present a cross cultural program for our Meeting. Karen presented each of us with handmade corn husk angels as a thank you for our support. We are very happy the trip went well and Karen and Cadi are safely back with us with much to share. Father s Day-June 15-Anne and Dianne will make chocolate chip cookies to present to all men

7 who attend Meeting on Father s Day. Our recent graduates will also be recognized. Taylor Holmes and Jeremy Parker from High School and Rachael Desmond from college. Anne will purchase cards and Margaret will present them. Education for Esther Our summer Sunday School project through FUM. This is also a Mission project for June. Eden Grace, who works for FUM globally, and was in Kenya for many years, started this project. It is a fund raising project to provide young girls who are high achievers, a chance to attend secondary school. This is an area in Kenya called Turkana. Bibles for the Moore children will possibly be presented at Christmas time for Sam, Mary Catherine and Eliza. Looking back over the year. Some Committee members have been feeling a disconnect between the teens and younger Sunday School children. It was suggested to go back to having all children present for the S.S. opening time of 10 min. Maybe have a teen lead it as we have done in the past. We will continue to discuss this. Carol and Margaret, in thinking for the future, maybe a Service Project with older children paired with younger. The Teens have been meeting every Sun. morning and feel pressed for time. They may be interested in meeting an additional time. Goat farm visit during summer Anne will check with Annie. For next year Sue will put a notice in the bulletin that RE is looking for teachers for S.S. Whether a couple weeks is doable, a month, half a year or the whole year. Some of our teachers need a break and some extra help. There will be no meeting in July but RE will start the new year by meeting on Aug. 13 at 6:30 at the Meetinghouse. Dianne Aldrich Library Committee: No report Music Committee: The Music Committee is in the process of acquiring and purchasing all the royalties involved in the reproduction of the music and spoken word from the June 2014 Mostly Music Sunday. 7 Old Business: The Friend bulk mailing question: After a extensive discussion of cost effectiveness, availability and other issues centering around The Friend, it was decided that a sub-committee be established to work out the issues and suggestions regarding the manner in which the Friend is distributed. The committee will consist of Anne Gilson (clerk), Carol Nicholson, Jean Parker, Linda Doyen and Annie Bontrager. Website Update: Pictures are being added to our website as the committee is continually updating the site. Ann Davidson s Travel Minute from her trip to Ireland Yearly Meeting has been returned and signed by Daniel H. Sinton, Clerk, Ireland Yearly Meeting. He says that Ann was a welcome guest who shared in fellowship with Ireland s Quakers. New Business: Correspondence: Jim Rose is currently working on Friend s Journal archives from 1955 to Any other correspondence will be posted or distributed accordingly. The next Monthly Meeting will be August 17th at the rise of Meeting for (11:00 a.m.) Attendees: Bea Kimball, Lloyd Hartsough, Margaret Hartsough, Jean Parker, Diana van der Velden, Barbara Popenhusen, Ed Golem, Don Simkin, Norm Cole, Ellie Ellingham, Melissa Moore, Annie Bontrager, Carol Nicholson, Anne Gilson, Linda Doyen, Darleen Farley, Cynthia Marvin, Polly Nicholson, Rachael Desmond, Margaret Webb, Marion Cole, Dianne Aldrich and Kathy Dudarchik. Marion Cole, Clerk Kathy Dudarchik, Recording Clerk

8 Farmingtonn Friend August :00-4:00 Baby Shower for Margaret and Christopher at the Meetinghouse. 3 9:15 Unprogrammed 10: :15 Unprogrammed 10: :30 Ministry & Counsel :30 Parsonage Potluck 16 2: Farmington Quaker Meetinghouse Program Declaring Equality :15 Unprogrammed 10:00 Monthly Meeting on Rise from 24 9:15 Unprogrammed 10: :15 Unprogrammed 10:00

9 Farmingtonn Friend September :30 Spiritual Writing Group 2 3 6:15 RE Meeting :00 Sunday School All Age Groups 10:15-10:45 Unprogrammed 10:00-11:00 Adult Bible Study 11:00 8 6:30 Spiritual Writing Group Rally Day 10:00 Sunday School Youth Group 10:15-10:45 Unprogrammed 10:00-11:00 Adult Bible Study 11:00 Friend Notes Due 15 6:30 Spiritual Writing Group 16 1:00 USFW :00 Sunday School All Age Groups 10:15-10:45 Unprogrammed 10:00-11:00 Adult Bible Study 11: :30 Spiritual Writing Group 23 6:30 Ministry & Counsel 24 7:00 Senior Choir :00 Handbell practice 10:00 Sunday School Youth Group 10:15-10:45 Unprogrammed 10:00-11:00 Adult Bible Study 11:00 Monthly Meeting on Rise from 29 6:30 Spiritual Writing Group 30

10 Front Page Page 2 Page 3 Page 4-7 Page 8 Page 9 Margaret s Musings/Birthdays/Treasurer s Report Society/Upcoming Events/RE Teachers/Mostly Music CDs Committee Minutes & Notes August Calendar September Calendar FARMINGTON FRIENDS CHURCH 140 Church Ave. Farmington, NY At the Ontario County Fair, July 2014

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