Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church

Transcription

1 HOLINESS THE JOURNAL OF WESLEY HOUSE CAMBRIDGE Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church Aan Pamer THE REVD DR ALAN PALMER is a Methodist presbyter and Lead Chapain at the James Paget University Hospitas NHS Trust. He was previousy Head of Reigious Studies at Cuford Schoo and Director of Open Learning at Oak Hi Theoogica Coege. He is the author of a commentary on the Psams and has church eadership experience in both Engand and Canada. aan.pamer@jpaget.nhs.uk Great Yarmouth, UK acknowedgement is given to the Susanna Wesey Foundation, based at the University of Roehampton, which initiay funded this research. This artice continues the series on acedia, which began with the history and deveopment of the term in the ast issue of Hoiness. Two areas are considered in this artice: first, introversion, and second, perfectionism. In both cases, reevant psychoogica iterature is reviewed to deveop the understanding of the concept. The impact this can have on eadership and ministry in the ife of the Church is then considered, aong with some refective suggestions for embracing the heathy aspects of introversion and perfectionism, whie avoiding the unheathy aspects, which ead to depetion of persona, spiritua and pastora resiience. ACEDIA INTROVERSION PERFECTIONISM PSYCHOLOGY CHURCH MINISTRY BURNOUT ISSN HOLINESS The Journa of Wesey House Cambridge Copyright author Voume 4 (2018) Issue 1 (Hoiness & Leadership): pp

2 Aan Pamer Introverts in the Church Introvert a shy, reticent person. in psychoogy, a person predominanty concerned with their own thoughts and feeing rather than with externa things. origins: mid-seventeenth century (as verb in the genera sense turn one s thoughts inward (in spiritua contempation) ); from modern Latin introvere to turn. Its use as a term in psychoogy dates from the twentieth century. 1 Henry David Thoreau noted perceptivey that What a man thinks of himsef, that it is which determines, or rather indicates his fate. 2 as we have seen, acedia is a mutifaceted compex, invoving within the term theoogica, spiritua, geographica and psychoogica components. The acedia compex, as we might term it, coud be enisted as a paradigm for a that depetes cergy in terms of their spiritua we-being and their abiity to work effectivey as pastors and Christian eaders. One echo of acedia that impacts cergy in the twenty-first century reates to the psychoogica condition commony known as introversion. In her remarkabe book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a Word that Won t Stop Taking, Susan Cain expores the chaenges that introverts face in society today, personay, sociay and corporatey. She perceptivey and hepfuy notes that personaity is as powerfu a shaping force in our ives and outook as perhaps gender and race. She writes: Our ives are shaped as profoundy by personaity as by gender or race. and the singe most important aspect of personaity the north and south of temperament is where we fa on the introvert extrovert spectrum. Our pace on this continuum infuences our choices of friends and mates, and how we make conversation, resove differences, and how we show ove. It affects the careers we choose and whether or not we succeed in them. 3 Reading Cain s words one can see immediatey that if Cain s premise is even partiay correct, being an introvert wi have significant effects on modern cergy and their abiity to maintain resiience and to be effective in pastora ministry. 96

3 Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church In recent years, there has been significant and exhaustive research into extroversion and introversion within the academic discipine of personaity psychoogy. There has aso been much work done on issues reating to introversion, Christian spirituaity and ministry, as we wi see ater. Introverts in an extrovert society The reason introversion is an important subject to consider is because we ive in a society, and perhaps a church, that is dominated by what Cain cas the extrovert idea. This is the omnipresent beief that the idea sef is gregarious, apha and comfortabe in the spotight. The archetypa extrovert, Cain notes, prefers action to contempation, risk-taking to heed-taking, and certainty to doubt. He/she favours quick decisions even at the risk of being wrong. Cain considers introversion, aongside its cousins, sensitivity, seriousness and shyness, to be considered second-cass personaity traits, somewhere between a disappointment and a pathoogy. 4 Introverts do not fit in we with society s dominating modes and expectations. according to Cain, they are to be compared to women iving in a man s word. Introverts tend to be discounted because of a trait that goes to the core of who they are. as seen in media modes and to some extent in popuar iterature, Western society apparenty finds extroversion an extremey appeaing personaity trait/stye. We shoud aso note that a majority of teachers beieve that the idea student is extrovert. Educators consider that pupi-ed earning, discussion and exporative group work are the best modes for earning. This approach hods true at both secondary- and at university-eve education. When the extrovert idea drives pedagogy, those who are more introverted can find it extremey difficut to engage with the earning process. This genera societa emphasis on the extrovert idea and bias against quiet causes introverts persona and socia discomfort, sometimes in the extreme. Cain notes that being prodded to come out of one s introvert sef can cause psychic pain. However, it has become an oppressive standard to which most of us fee we must conform. Interestingy, conformity to this extrovert idea may we have infitrated the Church s consciousness in terms of idea personaity types for ministeria work. We sha return to this ater. It has been noted that a great dea of unthinking, or perhaps cuturay intuitive, preference is given to those who exhibit an extrovert personaity type. For exampe, society apparenty considers extroverts, those who are takative, to 97

4 Aan Pamer be more inteigent, better ooking, more interesting and more desirabe as friends. apparenty, veocity of speech counts as we as voume. Research has shown that in a group setting the voube are considered smarter than the reticent, and that the group is often swayed by the person who dominates the conversation. again, this has significant impications for cergy engaged in parish ministry. The extrovert idea is viewed positivey by society, as we have noted. It is ogica then that introversion is not viewed in the same positive ight. The word introvert suffers under the burden of being a stigma. The psychoogist Laurie Hegoe notes that introverts describe their own physica appearance in vivid anguage, but when asked to describe generic introverts they drew a band and distastefu picture ( ungainy, neutra coours, skin probems ). 5 The terms extrovert and introvert stem from the work of Car Jung in In his ground-breaking book Psychoogica Types, Jung popuarised the terms introvert and extrovert as the buiding bocks of personaity. Jung perceptivey recognised that introverts are drawn to the inner word of thought and feeing, and extroverts to the externa ife of peope and activities. However, we shoud be aware that there is no a-purpose definition of introversion or extroversion; these are not unitary categories. In the onine pubication Psychoogy Today, Todd Kashdan notes: It is easy to tak about extroverts and introverts as if there is a cear divide between the two groups of peope. It is easy to take a test and pigeonhoe ourseves as one or the other. In reaity, we ignore the power of the situation. When we respond in a simiar way to the same situation at different times, we can think of this situation as a trigger for how we behave. In this case, we can view situations as part of our personaity. 6 Understanding introversion The so caed Big Five Schoo of persona psychoogy (ie, academics who contend that human personaity can be boied down to five primary traits) defines introversion not in terms of a rich inner ife but as a ack of quaities such as assertiveness and sociabiity. This appears to be an unnecessariy negative approach to introversion, describing what it is not rather than positivey noting the beneficia aspects of being an introvert. However, modern psychoogists do agree on the fact that introverts tend to need ess externa stimuus to enjoy ife 98

5 Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church than extroverts. Todd Kashdan notes: at its core, introversion is about deriving ess reward from being the center of socia attention. 7 The introvert may fee drained (emotionay depeted) by socia interaction. The extrovert personaity, on the other hand, needs much more externa stimuus for an activity or pursuit to be considered worth engaging in. again, Kashdan notes that the extrovert oves socia attention: It energizes them, it brings out their best quaities, and it bosters their stamina, extemporaneous thinking, and productivity. Extroverts tend to be stimuated by high-octane, risk-taking activities. More cerebra pursuits emotionay repenish introverts. Extroverts tend to tacke tasks quicky and can make fast (rash?) decisions; they can mutitask and enjoy new chaenges personay, sociay and in terms of career. On the other hand, introverts tend to work more sowy and deiberatey. They focus on one task at a time and can have pronounced eves of proonged concentration. In a parae idea to what has been stated above, Hans Eysenck described extroversion introversion as the degree to which a person is outgoing and interactive with other peope. 8 These behaviora differences are presumed to be the resut of underying differences in brain physioogy. Extroverts seek excitement and socia activity in an effort to heighten their arousa eve, whereas introverts tend to avoid socia situations in an effort to keep such arousa to a minimum. Eysenck designated extroversion as one of three major traits in his PEN mode of personaity, which aso incudes psychoticism and neuroticism. Buiding upon the work of Jung, the Myers-Briggs approach to personaity testing states that the first pair of psychoogica preferences is extroversion and introversion. They have a ist of characteristics for each personaity type, with which a cient can compare themseves. Extroversion (E) I ike getting my energy from active invovement in events and having a ot of different activities. I m excited when I m around peope and I ike to energise other peope. I ike moving into action and making things happen. I generay fee at home in the word. I often understand a probem better when I can tak out oud about it and hear what others have to say. 99

6 Aan Pamer The foowing statements generay appy to me: I am seen as outgoing or as a peope person. I fee comfortabe in groups and ike working in them. I have a wide range of friends and know ots of peope. I sometimes jump too quicky into an activity and don t aow enough time to think it over. Before I start a project, I sometimes forget to stop and get cear on what I want to do and why. Introversion (I) I ike getting my energy from deaing with the ideas, pictures, memories, and reactions that are inside my head, in my inner word. I often prefer doing things aone or with one or two peope I fee comfortabe with. I take time to refect so that I have a cear idea of what I be doing when I decide to act. Ideas are amost soid things for me. Sometimes I ike the idea of something better than the rea thing. The foowing statements generay appy to me: I am seen as refective or reserved. I fee comfortabe being aone and ike things I can do on my own. I prefer to know just a few peope we. I sometimes spend too much time refecting and don t move into action quicky enough. I sometimes forget to check with the outside word to see if my ideas reay fit the experience. 9 We shoud note at this point that introversion is not necessariy reated to shyness. Louis Schmidt of McMaster University, who studies the bioogica underpinnings of personaity, especiay shyness, states: Though in popuar media they re (i.e. introversion and shyness) often viewed as the same, we know in the scientific community that conceptuay or empiricay they are unreated

7 Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church a question to raise at this point is: are we born extroverts or introverts (nature), or do we become introverts or extroverts via sociaisation (nurture)? are we determined bioogicay to be either one personaity type or the other, or is there space for free wi and autonomous deveopment? Jerome Kagan s insightfu work on the amygdaa responses is reevant at this point. 11 The amygdaa is thought to be the emotiona centre of the brain and serves as the brain s emotiona switchboard. Kagan s work with chidren demonstrated that those with an excitabe amygdaa tend to be high responders to externa stimuus, and tend to grow up to be more introverted. He aso noted that those chidren with a ess excitabe amygdaa tended to be ow responders to externa stimui and need more externa stimuation for them to become excited and fuy engaged. These chidren tended to grow up with extrovert personaity traits. Eysenck aso thought that the basis of differing responses to stimuation observed in extroverts and introverts was due to the structure of the individua s brain in a brain structure caed the Ascending Reticuar Activating System (aras). Eysenck posited that the aras functioned differenty in introverts and extroverts: introverts have wide-open information channes, causing them to be fooded with information and over-aroused, whie introverts have tighter channes making them prone to under-arousa. 12 Cain states: Over-arousa doesn t produce anxiety so much as the sense that you can t think straight that you ve had enough and want to go home now. Under arousa is something ike cabin-fever. Not enough is happening: you fee itchy, restess, and suggish, ike you need to get out of the house aready. 13 Neuroogica science does indeed point to the shape and function of the brain as having a significant impact on whether we are extroverts or introverts. It is known that the amount of dopamine being produced in the brain has a significant impact on introversion and extroversion. aso, genetic infuences pay their part: for exampe, the SERT gene, which is inked to the neuro - transmitter serotonin and affects the transport of the serotonin. Bioogy and genetics do pay a fundamenta roe in forming our personaity types, but not necessariy our temperaments. The formation of our temperaments tends to have been in the ream of how we were raised, how we were treated, and how we were shown ove and affection. The personaity and expectations of our parents are aso a significant factor. 101

8 Aan Pamer as we have previousy noted, many find that they do not fit neaty into either category; most of us tend to be to some extent ambivert. Car Jung stated that There is no such thing as a pure extrovert or a pure introvert. Such a man woud be in a unatic asyum. Whether or not we are geneticay biased towards either extroversion or introversion there is something that the author Susan Cain thinks we shoud understand in a this: Once we understand introversion and extroversion as preferences for certain eves of stimuation (whether we are high reactors or ow reactors to externa stimuus), then we can begin consciousy trying to situate ourseves in environments favourabe to our personaity neither overstimuating nor under stimuating, neither boring nor anxiety-making. We can organise our ives in terms of what personaity psychoogists ca optima eves of arousa and what I ca sweet spots and by doing so fee more energetic and aive than before. 14 Cain poses what at first seems a sighty facie question, but one that has serious impications for Christians in genera and serving cergy in particuar: In Does God ove introverts? an Evangeica Diemma? Francis notes that the issue of personaity types and cergy needs addressing without deay. He writes, Further work, further research is urgent. 15 Introverts in the Church This question has been picked up and addressed by the american Presbyterian adam McHugh in his book Introverts in the Church: Finding our Pace in an Extroverted Cuture. 16 It is to the subject addressed in McHugh s book that we now turn. We wi attempt to show that introversion is an echo of the ancient depetion agent acedia, in that both negativey impact the persona and spiritua we-being and resiience of modern cergy in the performance of their ministeria task. Recent research has shown that cose to 50 per cent of the popuation coud be cassified as introverts, an increase from earier studies that indicated a figure nearer 25 per cent. 17 If this is the case, and there are different views on this, it means that it is ikey that 50 per cent of church congregations have introvert personaity traits. Foowing on from this, and recognising that there are psychoogica variabes within the constituency of Christians who enter futime ministry, we can safey say that introverts are we represented among 102

9 Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church modern cergy. Therefore, we need to take an in-depth ook at the materia that McHugh presents on introverts in the Church. The origins of the book Introverts in the Church ie in a time when McHugh was considering resigning from ordination training because he was under the strong impression that ordained ministry required socia skis and being in socia situations which drained and exhausted him. He reaised that the issue was not vocationa per se, but primariy about personaity and temperament. He writes: Even before I began pastora ministry, I was convinced that my personaity (Introvert) excuded me from it. There was no room in ministry for someone of my disposition or so I thought. McHugh continues: In my mind at the time, idea pastors were gregarious, abe to move through crowds effortessy, abe to quicky turn strangers into friends. They coud navigate diverse socia circes and chat about a number of topics. They thrived in the presence of peope and were energised by conversation and socia interaction they were charismatic and magnetic, capabe of drawing peope to themseves by the virtue of their ikeabiity and abe to persuade peope to foow them based on charm aone. I, by contrast, reished times of soitude, refection, and persona study. Even though I enjoyed spending time with peope I iked, I ooked forward to moments of privacy. I found crowds draining. I coud stand up in front of a arge congregation and preach without nervousness, but I often stumbed through the greeting time afterward because my energy reserves were dry. 18 To combat this sense of aienation and ack of eccesiastica fit, McHugh thought that he shoud attempt to squeeze himsef into the extrovert mode of church eadership instead of becoming the kind of eader that God had designed him to be. McHugh is surey representative of many introverted cergy who find that the ethos of the Church is extrovert. Like McHugh, they find particuary that evangeica churches are difficut paces for introverts to thrive for both theoogica and cutura reasons. McHugh discovered that the North american extrovert idea had infitrated the Church and the image and mode of church eadership. He notes that there are historica reasons for this. The roots of the extroverted church eadership mode go back to the Great awakening in the USa during the eighteenth century. George Whitefied, whose preaching made a huge impact on both 103

10 Aan Pamer sides of the atantic at that time, had a pronounced extrovert stye of preaching to the masses. Church historian Mark No comments on Whitefied s extrovert homietic stye: In the pupit he seemed to exude energy; his speech was to the highest degree dramatic; he offered breath-taking impersonations of bibica characters and needy sinners; he fired his istener s imagination; he wept profusey, often and with stunning effect. 19 McHugh aso cites the emotionaism of the Camp Meetings hed during the Second Great awakening in america. The speakers at these meetings emphasised that a conversion had to be sudden and dramatic (emotiona) to be truy authentic. according to McHugh, evangeica churches today sti put a great emphasis on the more extrovert and pubic expressions of faith, piety and passion and particuary speaking about faith. Modern evangeica churches seem to have faen fou of E. M. Forster s character Mrs Moore s jibe, poor itte takative Christianity in A Passage to India. Extroversion can ead to verbosity and this is something with which not a are comfortabe. Henri Nouwen, for exampe, is often concerned that our wordiness might be a mask for a spiritua void. Extrovert Christianity aso appears to evidence a performance-based approach to faith. Perhaps we get an understanding of the origin of this approach from the work of the German socioogist Max Weber and his book The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitaism ( ). The Encycopedia Britannica expains Protestant ethic, in socioogica theory, as the vaue attached to hard work, thrift, and efficiency in one s wordy caing. These things, especiay in the Cavinist view, were deemed signs of an individua s eection, or eterna savation. 20 Extrovert Christianity seems to see busyness as next to godiness. For McHugh, an extrovert Christian is a very active Christian in the terms of doing. Eugene Peterson candidy comments that american Christianity is typified by its messianicay pretentious energy. 21 In a church cuture that is buit upon an extrovert expression of faith, it is easy to see how introverts might fee uncomfortabe and excuded. This may be especiay true when it comes to church eadership and pastora ministry. How do introvert cergy fit into an extrovert Church? How wi introvert ministeria candidates fair in terms of success at seection committees or conferences? How wi introvert cergy fair in terms of being invited to a church to take up a new ministeria roe? McHugh notes that our action-orientated cuture does not aways vaue peope who are (quiet?) thoughtfu and refective. Perhaps the extroverted church is in danger of excuding introverted cergy who may be abe to take a community to its refective and meditative centre. McHugh is 104

11 Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church insightfu when he writes that, The truy heathy church is a combination of introverted and extroverted quaities that fuidy move together. 22 Contempative eaders J. I. Packer notes that The heathy Christian is not necessariy the extrovert, ebuient Christian. 23 Considering such statements, more thought must be given to eccesiastica space for a more quiet, refective and even apophatic approach to spirituaity. Thought must surey now be given to a recaibration of our understanding of spiritua eadership. McHugh is convinced that the best way to achieve the extrovert/introvert baance within our Christian com - munities is by caing different kinds of eaders. The introvert pastor wi naturay bring a different spirituaity to that of the extroverted cergyperson. Introverts, according to McHugh, bring much-needed baance to a eadership team. McHugh suggests that churches work their way through the foowing questions when they are ooking to appoint new pastora staff or augment an existing cergy team: 1. What are our measures for gauging eadership potentia (considering extrovert and introvert expressions of eadership potentia)? 2. How do we identify and seect our eader s potentia (considering extrovert and introvert expressions of eadership potentia)? 3. Is our evauative ens extroverted? 4. Do we excusivey ook for charismatic, gregarious pastors? 5. How important is it that our eaders are skied at istening as we as taking? 6. In seecting ay eaders do we eevate those who attend the most activities and are most popuar? 7. are we open to different kinds of eaders, peope who are thoughtfu and contempative and who ead by exampe? 24 I woud add a coupe of additiona questions to this ist: 8. are we factoring personaity traits into our seection and training for ministry in the Methodist Church in Great Britain, and esewhere? 9. are we ensuring that there is a poicy and a practica structure that sensitivey supports differing personaity types in their ministry? Ian Cowey brings us to a we-baanced concusion: Finding the baance between engagement and disengagement wi be different for each of us. Some of us are extroverts who gain energy from being with peope, whie others are introverts 105

12 Aan Pamer who need time and space on their own to renew their energy and their enthusiasm for being engaged with peope and their needs. There must be some disengagement for each of us if we are to have time for prayer, knowing God and istening to Him. In our contemporary cuture the overwheming pressure is to be doing too much, to be overy engaged in doing and not sufficienty invested in being. 25 Perfectionists in the Church Perfectionism a refusa to accept any standard short of perfection. in phiosophy, a doctrine hoding that perfection is attainabe, especiay the theory that human mora or spiritua perfection shoud be or has been attained. another echo of the ancient acedia compex is what writers on the subject ca bad perfectionism, the beief that uness everything is absoutey right it is absoutey wrong. as we sha see, this bad brand of perfectionism has a detrimenta effect on the persona we-being of cergy; it diminishes and depetes their reservoir of resiience and it may we ead to burnout, break - down or depression. If unchecked, perfectionism can cause a cergyperson to become a victim of akrasia, the inabiity to make decisions (ataraxia being the preferred condition, one of tranquiity ). Perfectionism can ead to ministeria paraysis and ineffectiveness. Understanding perfectionism We now wi examine the origins and the consequences of perfectionism. One of our guides, with others, wi be the psychiatrist Richard Winter, who has written extensivey about perfectionism among Christians and Christian eaders (see his Perfecting Ourseves to Death 26 ). The Engish word perfect derives from the Latin perficere, which means to make thorough or compete. The Oxford Engish Dictionary (fourth edition) states that the word perfect means compete in a respects; without defect or omission; fawess; in condition of compete exceence; fautess; competey correct or accurate; exact; precise. The Greek word transated perfect is teos, which means end or purpose. 106

13 Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church The concept of teos is significant in the writing of the fourth-century BCE Greek phiosopher aristote. aristote considered that a thing or a person is good if it achieves the purpose (teos) for which it was designed. For exampe, a good human is one who reaches fu physica, emotiona, inteectua and spiritua maturity that person has reached their teos or perfection. aristote beieved that by using the Goden Mean a baanced and virtuous (aretaic) ife between the vices of deficiency and excess coud be achieved (a perfect ife in the sense of teos). He aso considered that by using phronesis (practica wisdom), humans coud earn to fourish, achieve eudaimonia, a disposition of we-being or fourishing. Thomas aquinas ( ), Dr angeicus as he was known, whie teaching at the University of Paris and accessing aristoteian materia via Musim schoars, took the aristoteian phiosophy of teos and eudaimonia and appied it to Christian theoogy. aquinas introduced the eement of theoogica rationaity and Christian-based concepts of purpose. The major focus of teos (purpose/ end/perfection) for aquinas was to focus on the worship of God. The issue that now confronts twenty-first-century secuar societies is how, without the aristoteian and Thomist Christian structure of teos (purpose/ perfection) or any other reigious framework for that matter, we know what the end or perfection is towards which we are working. In a society that has disengaged from major metanarratives, the pursuit of perfection becomes one of individua customisation. In a word that rejects any hint of absoute guideines (secuar reativism) it is eft to the individua to decide what perfection is and how it wi be achieved. We then become vunerabe to what Winter cas the seductive sirens of perfectionism. These sirens can come in the form of media advertising. These media adverts highight the inadequacy and imperfections in our ives. In the individuaised pursuit of this virtua perfection our society has turned to technoogy in the hope of securing twentieth-century teos. This is highighted in the fim Gattaca (1997, directed by andrew Nico), where embryos are screened for height, sex, IQ and vunerabiity to disease; which is in point of fact the ongoing search for the infamous designer (perfect) offspring. Over the past decade and a haf there has been a great interest in per - fectionism in professiona psychoogica iterature. It was not unti 1930 that the word perfectionist was coined. Winter points out that it was then commony accepted as describing a person who is ony satisfied by the highest standards. More recenty research has homed in on whether a perfectionism 107

14 Aan Pamer is harmfu and destructive or whether some forms of it can be hepfu and constructive. Some psychoogists have caimed that there is a norma, heathy adaptive form of perfectionism the pursuit of high standards and exceence that can be distinguished from neurotic, unheathy, maadaptive perfec - tionism. Other researchers state that perfection is impossibe and therefore attempting to reach it is obviousy unheathy. The spectrum of perfectionism Fett and Hewitt put forward a positive view of perfectionism it is the heathy pursuit of exceence. 27 They define perfectionism as the striving for fawessness. They note that extreme perfectionists are peope who want to be perfect in a aspects of their ives. Simpy put, it s the tendency to set extremey high standards; the use of the term tendency impies for Fett and Hewitt the possibiity of being on some part of a perfectionist continuum, that is, there are degrees of perfectionism. The important point here in terms of emotiona, socia, menta and spiritua we-being is how intensey we strive to reach those standards that we cassify as constituting exceence or perfection, and how we respond when we do not come up to expected standards. How much we strive (are we obsessiona?) and how much we crash emotionay when we fai are indicators as to whether we are adaptive in our perfectionism or maadaptive; whether it is a heathy or unheathy form of perfectionism. Winter notes: The size of the discrepancy between what is possibe and what is pursued is a critica factor that makes a the difference between heath and sickness so aso is the intensity with which one attempts to overcome the discrepancy. 28 There is evidence that high eves of perfectionism are associated with vunerabiity to menta heath probems, reationa and socia probems, and career probems. In terms of seeing perfectionism as a spectrum, neurotic perfec tionism is at one end of the continuum and non-perfectionism is at the other, and somewhere in the midde (ike aristote s Goden Mean) we find norma, heathy perfectionism. Heathy perfectionism, for our purposes here, is characterised by high standards, high eves of organisation and striving for exceence. Heathy perfectionists: are usuay fu of energy and enthusiasm have positive sef-image rarey procrastinate over decisions are reaistic about strengths and weaknesses 108

15 Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church are driven more by positive motivation to achieve than by negative fear of faiure. Psychoogist Don Hamachek notes: Norma perfectionists are those who derive a very rea sense of peasure from the abours of painstaking effort and fee free to be ess precise as the situation permits Norma perfectionists tend to enhance their sef-esteem, rejoice in their skis, and appreciate a job we done. 29 However, perfectionism is often seen as a two-edged sword. a seminar arranged by the University of Southampton was described in this way: Perfectionism is a doube-edged sword. On the one hand, per - fectionism motivates peope to give their best. On the other, perfectionism makes peope despair and doubt themseves. Moreover, perfectionism is associated with various psychoogica probems such as stress, anxiety, and depression. Perfectionism, however, is a compex characteristic. There are various forms of perfectionism, and some are more harmfu than others. In particuar, it is important to differentiate perfectionistic strivings (striving for perfection) from perfectionistic concerns (concern over mistakes). 30 In contrast to heathy perfectionists, neurotic, unheathy perfectionists set unreaisticay high standards. Their sense of sef-worth depends amost entirey on performance and production according to the goas they have set themseves. They are continuousy sef-critica; they find mistakes confirm their feeings of useessness and they often doubt that they can do anything right. Whatever they do, it is never quite good enough. This type of unheathy perfectionism can be seen in James Joyce s a Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man. Schoars note that A Portrait acts as a transitiona stage between the reaism of Joyce s Dubiners and the more esoteric symboism of Uysses. There is itte doubt that Portrait is a thiny vaied autobiography of Joyce s eary ife. Stephen, the focus of the nove, is never quite satisfied with his ife and with his writing; he strugges with anguage, wresting to encapsuate his ideas in words. In the ast part of the nove he resorts to using words in a sort of nihiistic stream of consciousness. Stephen (Joyce) cannot find fufiment in the Cathoic Church, in his famiy, in his writing 109

16 Aan Pamer or in his reationships. Nothing is quite what he wants it to be. He was ike the mythica Icarus: he had times when he few high, ony to find himsef crashing to the ground singed by the sun of circumstances. In rea ife, Joyce, in a fit of frustration, threw an eary version of A Portrait into the fire. He aways saw this nove as incompete, a work of an inexperienced young author, never perfect in iterary terms; hence it is a portrait by a young and deveoping, yet not compete (imperfect) artist. The Engish essayist and author George Orwe aso seemed to share some of Joyce s perfectionist angst. He writes: I knew that I had a faciity with words and a power of facing unpeasant facts, and I fet that this created a sort of private word in which I coud get my own back on my faiure in everyday ife. 31 Neurotic, unheathy perfectionists tend to set unreaisticay high standards and their sense of sef-worth depends entirey on their own performance and production according to the goas they have set themseves. Unheathy perfectionists aso tend to catastrophise everything as either competey right or competey wrong. Cergy who suffer from this maady can be widy over sef-critica if they get one word wrong in a sermon, for exampe. as you wi see from the ist beow, unheathy perfectionism wi adversey impact a those who experience it. However, those engaged in pubic ministry may find this even more depeting. Unheathy perfectionists experience the foowing: continuous sef-criticism in the form of concern over mistakes and doubts that they are doing the right thing. noticing faiures more than success; one error or faw obiterates any satisfaction in their endeavours. over-concern with organisation, precision and order. thinking in back or white, a or nothing categories. a desire to exce at any cost, and a tendency to being over-controing in reationships. motivation by fear of negative consequences, faiure, rejection or punishment. 110

17 Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church It is important to note that some other approaches state that a perfectionism is neurotic and unheathy and what some abe as norma perfectionism is not perfectionism at a (norma woud be caed conscientiousness or an oriented work-stye ). Tom Greenspon beieves that heathy perfectionism is an oxymoron. Greenspon continues: Pursuing exceence, incuding pushing yoursef to do better, constanty improving, setting your goas high, are a fine and are competey different from perfectionism. 32 This non-spectrum view pushes towards an unequivoca definition of perfection, in an attempt to avoid ambiguity. How ever, this may not be a subte enough instrument to discuss the compexity of this personaity trait; the spectrum view is perhaps a more hepfu way forward. We shoud note in summary that pursuing exceence, high standards personay and professionay, and having a good work ethic is heathy. However, a minefied of potentia probems awaits those persons (especiay cergy) who pursue fawess perfection with too much intensity. We need to be abe to spot when heathy striving for exceence becomes unheathy perfectionism in ourseves and others. (See Tabe 1.) Unheathy perfectionism (perfectionist) Ideaistic Strives for the impossibe Fears faiure Product-minded Has to be the best Views ife as a threat Hates criticism Dwes on mistakes Vaues sef for what they do Person of exceence (heathy perfectionism) Reaistic Strives for the doabe Views ife as a chaenge anticipates success Process-minded Wants to do their best Vaues criticism Learns from mistakes (see Matthew Syed s book, Back Box Thinking 33 ) Vaues sef for who they are Tabe 1: Perfectionism, heathy and unheathy We shoud aso note that defeated perfectionists often become victims of their own standards. They tend to carry a partiay subconscious picture of their idea sef. This works we when things go we but when they don t, when a faw becomes pubic, their a-or-nothing thinking takes hod. They often perceive themseves as compete disasters, despicabe, unreiabe, incompetent peope. 111

18 Aan Pamer Defeated perfectionists often suffer from what socioogists ca the ookinggass sef. This is where you become what the most important person in your ife thinks you are. Derren Brown, in his book Happy, aso states that we see ourseves in terms of the stories we concoct about ourseves and our abiities. 34 Our view of ourseves in these stories often fas short of the perfectionist idea we beieve goes with ove and approva by others in our ives. This faiure to ive up to the standards expected by, for instance, parents narratives becomes deepy ingrained and in many ways defines us. Brown writes: It is hard to think about your past without tidying it up into a kind of story: one in which you are cast as the hero or the victim. Some of these stories are consciousy constructed, but others operate without our knowedge, dictated by scripts handed to us by others when we were young. We can carry around a psychoogica egacy from our parents for our whoe ives, whether bad or good. Where they have unfufied wishes or regrets, these are commony passed to us as a tempate for storyteing. Many of these tempates make it hard for us to fee happy: You must achieve impressive things to be happy/oved. Or, You must sacrifice your own happiness to make others fee better: that is the measure of your worth. 35 Brown continues: Simiar insidious directives can aso come from the Church, our peers, cassmates and teachers, the cumuative effect of the news media we encounter daiy or any number of ideoogies in which we find ourseves enmeshed. 36 Defeated perfectionists can suffer the doube torment of beieving the myth of omni-competence and faiure. Types of perfectionism Perfectionism is, of course, mutifaceted, and the foowing categorisation can be hepfu: 1. Performance perfectionism a Sense of vaue is highy dependent on how they perform. b Measurabe productivity and achievement is vita to their sense of we-being. 112

19 c If unabe to perform at the highest eves, can become anxious and depressed. 2. Appearance perfectionism a Must ook perfect on every occasion. b Surroundings must ook perfect (office and/or home). 3. Interpersona perfectionism a Have set ideas on how things shoud be done tends to make reationships difficut. aso, wi make deegation to others stressfu for the interpersona perfectionist. b With an outward focus may be very critica and demanding of others and therefore become sociay and professionay isoated. c With an inward focus may be very sef-critica and therefore avoid reationships for fear of being discovered to be ess than perfect. 4. Mora perfectionism Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church a Keeps rues meticuousy. b Sense of identity rests on perfect behaviour. c Legaistic and judgementa. 5. A-round perfectionism a Tends to be an obsessive personaity. b Prone to OCD. Academic cassifications of personaity traits In 1991 Hewitt and Fett deveoped an approach to understanding perfec - tionism caed the Mutidimensiona Perfectionism Scae, which has been highy infuentia, yet not without its critics. They based their approach not so much on the area of ife invoved but on the direction of the perfectionism. They came up with three types of perfectionism: 1. sef-oriented perfectionism 2. sociay prescribed perfectionism 3. other-oriented perfectionism. 113

20 Aan Pamer We shoud note that there are very few peope who woud combine a three of these categories. We wi briefy ook at these three types, beginning with sef-oriented perfectionism. Sef-oriented perfectionism Note in Tabe 2 beow that sef-oriented perfectionism has a heathy set of characteristics and a neurotic and unheathy set of characteristics. Norma heathy Sef-assured assertive Conscientious Organised Discipined Determined Diigent Thoughtfu Courteous Empathetic Hepfu Strong mora standards Sensitive conscience Neurotic unheathy Depressed Impatient Sef-baming Shame and guit Irritabe angry Fears criticism avoids chaenges Suicida tendencies Tabe 2: Heathy and unheathy characteristics of sef-oriented perfectionism Sef-oriented perfectionists set high and often rigid standards for themseves. work hard to attain perfection and avoid faiure. are sef-critica and tend to focus primariy on faws and faiures. take responsibiity for their ives and don t bame others when they fai. are often very successfu peope, usuay described in positive terms by others. are usuay sef-confident, charming and quiety assertive. There is much about sef-oriented perfectionists that is adaptive and heathy. They are very often competent in deaing with difficut and stressfu situations. 114

21 However, when they move into the reams of unheathy perfectionism and the neurotic range of this personaity trait, things become more negative. For exampe, probems begin to surface in their reationships. The person who is a sef-oriented perfectionist has feeings of inferiority and fees unworthy of friendship. They ive in the constant fear that friends wi find out what they are reay ike and wi then be rejected. So, to protect themseves, sef-oriented perfectionists tend to keep their distance from other peope. This inevitaby eads to shaow friendships and ack of intimate reationships. Sef-oriented perfectionists might we be friendy on the surface, often anxious to pease, though not often very sef-reveaing. Often they are so focused on organising their ives with to do ists, and making a good impression, that they find difficuty in just being in a reationship. aso, because they are so intent on being perfect themseves they can appear aoof, impatient and competitive. Being hypersensitive to any form of rejection, sef-oriented perfectionists often react defensivey to criticism. Under certain extremey stressfu conditions, this type of perfectionism can be destructive: norma coping mechanisms are overwhemed, maybe eading to depression, shame and guit, and sometimes sady to suicide. It is not difficut to see what sef-oriented perfectionism might do to a cergyperson with this personaity trait. He or she is very ikey to encounter highy stressfu situations, distressing experiences, and so on. They are aso in a very pubic profession, having to preach, ead worship and chair meetings. In ministry, there can be a ot of criticism aimed at cergy too. So, if the cergyperson is a sef-oriented perfectionist he or she is going to find penty of opportunities to experience deep feeings of rejection, sef-criticism and perhaps guit and shame. The next personaity trait to be considered is potentiay even more depeting and destructive for a cergyperson. Sociay prescribed perfectionism Sociay prescribed perfectionists tend to fee that they must meet other peope s expected standards at a costs. They worry to an abnorma degree about what others expectations of them are, and fear rejection when they don t meet these expectations. These are some of the peris of sociay prescribed perfectionism: excessive checking and seeking reassurance anxiety and worry Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church decreasing productivity and performance 115

22 Aan Pamer impaired heath eating disorders depression suicida ideas obsessive-compusive symptoms scrupuosity reationship probems. again, it is not difficut to see how destructive this woud be in terms of a cergyperson s ife and ministry. If you project the foowing symptoms of sociay prescribed perfectionism on to a cergyperson in a parish setting you wi see how depeting and debiitating this might be. For exampe, sociay prescribed perfectionists fee that they are under the spotight a the time; they are being rigorousy evauated by others. This often eads cergy to become workahoics. Their work is Sisyphusian it is never competed. They can never do enough for God. They can never do enough parish or pastora work to satisfy themseves or to fee that others are satisfied with them. anne Jackson, in her book Mad Church Disease, writes: The fear of etting peope down, especiay in spiritua matters, can often cause us to fee obigated or pressured into meeting unreaistic expectations, or worse, spending more time doing things for God instead of being what God wants us to be. That can ead to serious stress. 37 Cergy particuary need the support of the Christian famiy, the Church. However, sady the ministry context for many cergy is often part of the probem. Some parishes are what Winter describes as a poisonous environment of un-grace or dis-grace. 38 David Seamands, in his artice Perfectionism: Fraught with Fruits of Sef-Destruction, in Christianity Today writes perceptivey: Many years ago, I was driven to the concusion that the two major causes of most emotiona probems among evangeica Christians are these: the faiure to understand, receive, and ive out God s unconditiona grace and forgiveness; and the faiure to give out that unconditiona ove, forgiveness and grace to other peope We 116

23 Echoes of acedia: introverts and perfectionists in the Church read, we hear, we beieve a good theoogy of grace. But that s not the way we ive. The good news of the Gospe of grace has not penetrated [to] the eve of our emotions. 39 Phiip Yancey cites Pau Tournier s book Guit and Grace, where he writes: I cannot study this very serious probem [of guit reated to perfectionism] with you without raising the very obvious and tragic fact that reigion my own as we as that of a beievers can crush instead of iberate. 40 Eccesiastica egaism and rigidity inked to expressions of perfectionism are never far beow the surface. Leo Tostoy, who batted egaism a his ife, understood the weaknesses of a reigion based on externas. as Yancey notes, one of Tostoy s books, The Kingdom of God is Within You, says it we. 41 according to Tostoy, a reigious systems tend to promote externa rues, or moraism. In contrast, Jesus refused to define a set of rues that his foowers coud then fufi with a sense of satisfaction. One can never arrive in ight of such sweeping commands as Love the Lord your God with a your heart and with a your sou and with a your mind Be perfect, therefore, as your heaveny Father is perfect. Tostoy drew a contrast between Jesus approach and that of a other reigions: The test of observance of externa reigious teaching is whether or not our conduct conforms with degrees. [Observe the Sabbath. Get circumcised. Tithe.] Such conformity is indeed possibe. The test of observance of Christ s teachings is our consciousness of faiure to attain an idea perfection. The degree to which we draw near this perfection cannot be seen; a we can see is the extent of our deviation. 42 The German Reformer Martin Luther appears to have suffered from an unheathy does of reigious perfectionism too. He writes: athough I ived a bameess ife as a monk, I fet that I was a sinner with an uneasy conscience before God. I aso coud not beieve that I had peased him with my works. Far from oving that righteous God who punished sinners I actuay oathed him. I was a good monk, and kept my order so stricty that if ever a monk coud get to heaven by monastic discipine, I was that monk. a my companions in the monastery woud confirm this and yet my conscience woud not give me certainty, but I aways doubted and said, You didn t do that right. You weren t contrite enough. You eft that out of your confession. 117

24 Aan Pamer Cergy who are sociay prescribed perfectionists, ike Luther, wi aso exhaust themseves endessy checking that they have got things right. This too can ead to anxiety and anxiety disorders. It can aso ead cergy who are sociay prescribed perfectionists to put off doing something, to procrastinate. This procrastination is a safety net; if one doesn t begin a task one cannot be judged to have faied in the eyes of society or congregation. an artice on the Open Cuture website entited The Neuroscience and Psychoogy of Procrastination and How to Overcome It states: Chronic procrastination is not a time management issue, says Ferrari, it is a maadaptive ifestye. Habitua procrastinators, the [Wa Street Journa] writes, have higher rates of depression and anxiety and poorer we-being. We may think, writes Eric Jaffe at the association for Psychoogica Science s journa, of procrastination as an innocuous habit at worst, and maybe even a hepfu one at best, a strategy Stanford phiosophy professor John Perry argued for in The Art of Procrastination. Instead, Jaffe says, in a sobering summary of Pychy s research, procrastination is reay a sef-inficted wound that graduay chips away at the most vauabe resource in the word: time. 43 Cergy who are sociay prescribed perfectionists can be prone to akrasia, a weakness of the wi. They know what is the right thing to do, but because of fear of faiure and fear of dispeasing others they are frozen into inactivity. In an artice by James Cear, The akrasia Effect: Why we don t Foow Through on What we Set Out to do and What to do about it, the author cites Victor Hugo as an interesting exampe of akrasia or procrastination. In 1830 Hugo was facing an impossibe deadine. Tweve months earier the French author had made an agreement with his pubisher that he woud write a new book entited The Hunchback of Notre Dame. Instead of writing the book, Hugo spent the next year pursuing other projects, entertaining guests, deaying his work on the text. 44 In Matthew Syed s terminoogy, this is an exampe of pre-cosed oop behaviour. He writes: You are so worried about messing up that you never even get on the fied of pay. 45 Other-oriented perfectionism By contrast to the foregoing, other-oriented perfectionists are ony disparaging and judge menta about others. Not ony do they expect other peope to be perfect, but they can aso be highy critica of those who fai to meet their 118