BRING THE BOY HOME 2 Samuel 14:13 August 7, Dr. Howard Batson First Baptist Church Amarillo, Texas

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1 BRING THE BOY HOME 2 Samuel 14:13 August 7, 2016 Dr. Howard Batson First Baptist Church Amarillo, Texas So you want to get revenge on your rival, do you? He wronged you. She wronged you. Humiliated you. Hurt you. Abandoned you. Belittled you. Used you. All you need to do is visit mastersofrevenge.com. The headline is Get revenge on someone you hate. Make your world a better place. If you sign up for the regular , you will be informed by their newsletter about all the best ways to get even. How do they help you get revenge? Oh, they have a host of ways. First of all, there is the anonymous text message. You type out the text, and they send it from another country, absolutely untraceable. And they never cooperate with the police. Your hateful words popping up on your enemies phone unblockable, untraceable. Or, sign up your nemesis for nuisance phone calls annoying them any time of day or night with constant, unrelenting, and infuriating nuisance calls. They will even record the reaction and send it to you. Or, for a small price of $23.07, they will send a nasty, surprise gift to your enemy. From embarrassing envelopes and humiliating parcels to downright scandalous letters, you have the power to totally crush your enemy. Of course, the packages are shipped anonymously by international airmail to your victim. Every package, they promise, is as legally offensive as possible. You cannot buy a worse gift. For example, they ll send your wrongdoer a package labeled Discrete Home Supplies, or Home Test Urgent STD. If you really have some big bucks to spend, for $315, mastersofrevenge.com will create a bespoke website for the purpose of humiliating and crushing your enemy. They ll use secure, off-shore, and untraceable locations, while you can reveal and expose the most personal details about your enemy. And there is nothing, the website claims, that anyone can do about it. This website cannot be shut down. You send the info, photographs, and details, and in ten days the website will be launched and promoted. They even claim they can make the camera lie. You send a picture of your ex or your enemy and they will depict him or her doing anything you describe. With this kind of photo, the only limitation is your imagination. $48. Want to really rattle their cage? For $35, they ll send an unmarked CD with just the words, Listen to me. Of course, your nemesis will take the bait. A voice unknown to your enemy will begin telling them things they don t want to hear. Whatever you want them to say. The package

2 is anonymous, unmarked, sent from an untraceable overseas address. And as they play it, they hear everything they ve dreaded. Just remember, the website claims, when we get revenge for you, everything is anonymous, untraceable, and completely legal. Is revenge really the sweetest joy? You remember the story. Absalom, one of David s sons, has a beautiful full sister whose name is Tamar. But Amnon, the half-brother, began to lust after his own sister. Pretending to be sick, Amnon calls his half-sister, Tamar, to come and to be his nursemaid. He asks the king, himself, if Tamar could come and take care of him. The king ordered her to do so. Go and prepare his food. Cook for him. Amnon forces himself upon his own half-sister, a dreadful deed that broke the heart of the king, that broke the heart of Tamar and, most importantly, that broke the heart of her brother, Absalom. The Bible says in 2 Samuel 13:22 turn to it Absalom did not speak to Amnon, either good or bad, for Absalom hated Amnon, his brother, because he had violated his sister Tamar. See also verse 23. Absalom was able to hold the grudge for years. Two years of humiliation for Tamar, two years of anger for David, two years of brooding vengeance for Absalom. Justice against Amnon need not be swift but it must be sure. Dr. Isaiah Hankel (at advises those seeking revenge to wait for the right opportunity. By immediately retaliating against someone, you add energy to the situation and strengthen their resolve against you. You also expose your position, says the doctor. Instead of immediate action, the best strategy is to sit on your hands and let things marinate. Absolom had never read Dr. Hankel s advise on getting revenge, but, nonetheless, he waited. Absalom waited waited waited and waited for the right time. Absalom proposes that the king and his whole company go to the sheep shearing, perhaps to check on property and production. David says he won t go, but Amnon decides to make the trip. The journey is arranged. After two years of resentful brooding and careful planning, Absalom sees his chance. He instructs his servants men of deep loyalty who are ready to obey to watch for the signal to kill Absalom. When his heart is merry with wine, I ll say to you, Strike Amnon. And you, do not fear, I have commanded it. You put him to death. In the aftermath of the killing, there is chaos, panic for the other princes fear a bloodbath. In their fear, all members of the royal party who might be in danger flee. Royal news travels fast, but it also travels in a distorted form. The speedy and inaccurate report reaches David quickly. Absalom has killed everyone verse 30. David believes the news and is beside himself. He knew his family was troubled, but he had no idea how severely. He imagines the killing of all of his dynastic prospects for the future. Nathan

3 had destined a sword as David s future, but David had no inkling that the swath of the sword would be so wide. David enters into public grief and responds to the report of the deaths (verse 31). Finally, Jonadab reassures David that Absalom has no cause to kill all the king s sons. Absalom only wanted revenge against Amnon and envisioned no other killing. The conclusion Jonadab reaches: King, don t worry. Only Amnon alone is dead. Why? Notice verse 32 because he knows that Absalom has had the intent of revenge from the day that Tamar had been violated. Sometimes it is best to get out of town. Absalom flees (verse 34). He fled. Notice verse 34, verse 37, verse 38. The narrative is clear. Absalom is on the run. Now he, himself, is estranged from his father. Absalom fled, and David mourns. He is gone three years. Three years is a long time. David is without Amnon, who is dead, and now without Absalom. The narrator gives us a hint in verse 39. David is longing to see Absalom no longer wanting revenge on the revenger but, rather, wanting to embrace his son. Three years pass between chapter 13 and chapter 14 of 2 Samuel. Joab notices that David is missing Absalom, that he is ready for the revenge to be over. Joab calls a wise woman from Tekoa, an actress by trade? By inviting the king to her own theatre, he will be invited to perceive life differently. The woman might receive an Academy Award. She approaches the king, crying, prostrating herself, falling before him. Help, O King, help. What s your trouble? he asks. I am a widow, for my husband is dead. And your maid servant had two sons. But the two of them struggled together in the field, and there was no one to separate them. So, one struck the other and killed him. Now the rest of the family has risen against me, and they declare, Give us the one who struck his brother, and we will put him to death for the life of his brother, whom he killed, and destroy the heir also. If they do this, they will extinguish my coal which is left, so as to leave my husband neither name nor remnant on the face of the earth. King, I love my boys, and I never wanted one to kill the other. But now that the deadly deed is done, can I not keep the one son who remains? Ummm, let me think about it, says the king. Go to your house and I will give you the word later. She begs and pleads some more. Like a parent giving in to a whining child, the king has stopped being a judge and has started thinking like a parent thinking no longer with the royal robe, but, rather, with the heart.

4 Whoever bothers you about this matter, you bring him to me, and he ll not touch you any more. Not one hair of your son shall fall to the ground. The king declares he will stop the cycle of vengeance. When the cycle of vengeance is broken, homecoming is possible. David is a fierce man. He would not easily or knowingly compromise vengeance. But he has compromised here because, for an instant, the woman has permitted him to see life in an alternate way. David, once again, thinks as a parent who has lost one son to the hand of another and longs for the boy to come home. It takes a while, but eventually David has that moment of insight that Ah, ha moment when he realizes that the woman is not the mother of a son who has killed his brother. But, rather, it is he who is the parent. The woman is nothing but the actress of the theatre, portraying before his own eyes the saga of his own son. David is in a corner. No longer can he say that in her case it would be right for the boy to be forgiven to be welcomed home, to allow the cycle of vengeance and revenge to cease but in his case Absalom must continue to be banned from the royal city. 2 Samuel 14:21 Then the king said to Joab, Behold now, and I will surely do this thing. Go, therefore, and bring back the young man Absalom. In reality, it is hard to forgive and forget, isn t it? It s hard to want to move on. There are some of you here this morning your whole life has been lived in competition with someone else the competition of one-upmanship, the competition of getting even. Your decisions, your desires, your mental time, your thought processes are dominated by trying to take advantage of the other, to get revenge, to even the score. Like Absalom, who could do nothing but daydream for two years about killing Amnon, you sit and you think in the quietness of your own mind about how to make things right again! To be sure, you haven t crossed the line like Absalom. Your revenge is not the size of an oak tree. But, it s a seedling and it will grow until you take it to the cross of Christ Jesus and leave it there, knowing that because Jesus died on the cross for our sins we do not have to even the score. As God let our sins go, we are commanded to let the sins of others go by the wayside. I know it s not easy. It wasn t easy for David. In fact, if we read on in the story we realize that while he invited Absalom to come back to Jerusalem look at 14:24 he didn t let his son see his face. Verse 28 for two years he lived in Jerusalem and did not see the king s face. He called Joab, and Joab wouldn t return his calls. Finally, he has to set Joab s field on fire so that he will come out and talk to him. Verse 32

5 Behold, I sent for you saying, Come here that I may send you to the king to say, Why have I come here from Geshur? It would be better for me to be there. Now, therefore, let me see the king s face, and if there is iniquity in me, let him put me to death. Finally look at verse 33 all things are made right for a moment when Absalom and David embrace. Last week, I conducted the funeral for my friend, Arvis Stewart. Arvis s handiwork is all around our campus, from the stained glass in the rotunda, the chandeliers in the foyer, artwork in the hallway. He was a master stained glass maker. As I sat with the family and asked them to share their memories of their dad, his daughter Holly said she remembered her father would never really argue with her. Oh, she said, early on in life, he d been a little bit of a hothead. In his younger days, you could see steam coming out of his ears. But he didn t want to be that kind of person. So he was transformed I believe by God s Spirit to be a person of grace and patience. His daughter Holly says, On more than one occasion, I let him have my side of the story, but he just wouldn t fight back. She even wrote him a letter, letting him have it. He wrote back, speaking of her glorious birth and what a joy it was to watch her learn to ride her bicycle, and how she was one of the apples of his eye. No matter what she said, Arvis would not retaliate. I was reminded of Galatians 5. If someone is actually filled with the spirit of God, this is what Paul says they become. The fruit of the Spirit if love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law (vs ). In contrast, Paul says those who live by the flesh are filled with enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions (5:20). Anger, outbursts, disputes, dissensions deeds of the flesh. Love, joy, peace, kindness, gentleness the fruit of the Spirit. Arvis had been one, but he became the other through the indwelling of the Spirit of God. Who is it in your life who needs to come home someone banished far away? Where do you find yourself in the story today? Are you Absalom, who is so eaten away with the need for revenge that you plan and plot for two years, always looking for the opportunity to strike, to even the score? There are some of you who are where Absalom was. Someone in your family, like his sister, has been abused or mistreated by another, and your heart hurts with hate. How could they? They are awful, like Amnon was awful. And, even more than seeking justice though our court system, you just want downright revenge. The cross calls you to freedom - the freedom of forgiveness. There are some of you who play the part of David. There is a son, there is a daughter, there is a family member who you have banished. Yet, you know it s time for the boy, for the girl, to come home.

6 Remain vengeful and you ll realize you are eaten alive from the inside out. To you, the unknown wise woman from Tekoa comes, and she calls you to see life in a different way.

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