Ceremony of Confirmation

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1 Ceremony of Confirmation Festival of Shavuot 6 Sivan 5770 May 18, 2010 The world stands upon three things Torah, worship and acts of loving kindness. Pirkei Avot 1:2

2 Order of the Service Entrance of the Confirmation Class Processional Welcome: Rabbi Howard J. Goldsmith Introduction: Daniel Mishkin, Coordinator of Youth & Young Adult Learning Shavuot Service: Union Book, page 183 Presentation of Confirmation Certificates Blessing of Confirmands: Rabbi David M. Posner Declaration of Faith Adoration and Kaddish: Union Book, page 210 Rabbi Amy B. Ehrlich Benediction Recessional: Cantor Lori Corrsin Oneg to follow 1

3 The Confirmation Class has chosen open mindedness as its theme. Throughout our worship together this evening, the students will share their ideas about how open mindedness relates to issues about which they care. The students were free to choose any issue, and their selections say as much about their high degree of social consciousness as they do about their sensitive souls. The students studied the following story from the Talmud to learn what our tradition says about the importance of being open minded. Their reflections in this program, which they will read from the pulpit tonight, show just how relevant these ancient texts are to contemporary life. Rabbi Elazar and the Ugly Man (Story adapted from Talmud, Ta anit 20) The Rabbis taught: (In interpersonal matters) a person should always be soft like a reed and not hard like a cedar. Once upon a time, Rabbi Elazar ben Shimon was coming from his teacher s home in Migdal Gedor. He was riding on a donkey and traveling along a riverbank. He was happy and feeling very proud of himself because he had learned a lot of Torah from his teacher. While traveling, he happened to cross paths with a very ugly man. The ugly man said to Rabbi Elazar ben Shimon, Peace be upon you, my teacher. But Rabbi Elazar ben Shimon did not return the greeting. Instead he taunted him, How ugly you are! Are all the people of your city perhaps as ugly as you? The ugly man replied: I do not know. But why don t you go and tell the Craftsman who made me? Rabbi Elazar immediately realized that he had sinned by insulting the ugly man. He got down from the donkey and bowed before him. The rabbi said to the ugly man, I have spoken arrogantly to you. Please forgive me! The ugly man replied, I will not forgive you until you go to the Craftsman who made me and tell him how ugly I am! Rabbi Elazar walked behind the ugly man seeking his forgiveness until he reached his hometown. When they arrived, the people of his city came out to greet Rabbi Elazar. They said to him, Peace be upon you, teacher, teacher, master, master! 2

4 The ugly man said to them, Whom are you calling teacher, teacher? The townspeople said to, We are addressing Rabbi Elazar, the man who is traveling behind you. If this person you are greeting is a teacher, may there not be many like him in Israel! the ugly man replied. They said to him, Why so? He told them the whole story about how Rabbi Elazar had insulted him instead of returning his greeting. The townspeople replied, Forgive him nevertheless, because he is a man of great Torah knowledge. The ugly man relented, For your sakes I forgive him provided he does not make a habit of insulting others! After gaining forgiveness, Rabbi Elazar ben Rabbi Shimon immediately entered the house of study and taught: A person should always be soft like a reed and not hard like a cedar like I was to that ugly man. And it was for this reason that the reed merited to have pens drawn from its ranks to be used to write Torah scrolls, t fillin and mezuzot. Madeline Finkel Open Mindedness is important for addressing: stereotypes. If one immediately assumes something about people due to their race, appearance, religion or cultural background, then one will never really get to know them inside. Often there is more than meets the eye, and we should get to know people before making biased or unjust assumptions. Our class s Talmudic text relates to stereotypes because Rabbi Elazar immediately assumed that the ugly man s life was worthless due to his appearance. By insulting him, Rabbi Elazar displayed bias and acted on assumptions alone. This text teaches us that just because society or an individual says a man is not pleasant to look at, it does 3

5 not mean he does not have something to offer. In this story, the rabbi was originally thought of as the teacher, but the ugly man actually taught the rabbi a lesson. You grace humans with the ability to form opinions. With these opinions, mortals sometimes label and analyze others with a lack of judgment. God, assist us all in moving beyond prejudice and bias so that we may open our eyes and hearts to make the world a more perfect place. Blessed are You, who gives us thought and allows us to think for ourselves. Katie Hartman Open Mindedness is important for addressing: worldwide education for girls. Closed mindedness relates to this problem because people being too closed minded leads them to believe that girls do not deserve an equal education. Our class s Talmudic text shows the rabbi is at fault because he judges the ugly man based solely on his appearance. Not providing equal educational opportunities for both boys and girls is a way of judging the girls based solely on the fact that they are girls. The text teaches us that a difference in appearance is not a reason to judge someone, and everyone has the ability to teach and learn. God, you have the power to control all the minds in this world, and yet You graciously give each of us the strength to control our own thoughts. Please inspire us to open our minds more every day. Blessed are You, Adonai who graces us each with minds of our own. Molly Hirshik Open Mindedness is important for addressing: gay marriage or relationship intolerance. 4

6 When people are closed minded to gay marriage it limits other peoples happiness and makes it difficult for people to be in loving, happy relationships. Our class s Talmudic text relates to this issue because it has many parallels. People like Rabbi Elazar can have very strong opinions and voice them in a somewhat closed minded way. Some people might not realize that they are not accepting of people who are different from themselves. They do not listen to the other side of the argument. In this story, Rabbi Elazar judges someone without knowing his true character, and that is what people who are against gay marriage do. In the end, Rabbi Elazar changes his mind teaching that all people can change and open their minds. It takes a little persuasion, but when we are open minded, we can listen and realize our own faults. You allow us to free ourselves of closed mindedness and accept others for who they are. God, please give those with closed minds the ability to be enlightened. Praised are You for giving the gift of acceptance. Julia Slaff Open Mindedness is important for addressing: judging a book by its cover. When we do this, we judge people unfairly. A person may then be judged by the general public based only on appearances. Our class s Talmudic text relates to judging a book by its cover because the rabbi judges the man based on appearance. He calls him ugly, and the people call him ugly. This is a problem that could be resolved by listening to our teaching because we would not judge people on looks but rather personality. I hope that we all listen to the lesson of this story and change our superficial opinions of others based on what they look like on the outside. God, You have given us very open minded people to look up to such as President Obama and Oprah Winfrey. 5

7 May You grant us the energy and strength to be more open minded. Thank You God for this wonderful gift, a spirit of open mindedness. Sam Weintraub Open Mindedness is important for addressing: gay marriage. Some people think gay marriage is a sin and look down upon those who are gay. Our class s Talmudic text relates to gay marriage because it shows that if someone has a quality that is looked down upon, then they will not be listened to. Homosexuality is one example of this and might be one of the reasons why gay marriage is not legal in many states. This text can teach others that it is never okay to judge someone by appearance on the outside, as they may be a great person or couple on the inside. God gives us the ability to look upon situations clearly and with an open mind, allowing the possibility of bringing peace to this world. Please God, get those who start conflicts and wars to be more open minded towards their enemy. Thank You God for opening our minds in tough situations. Lauren Feiner Open Mindedness is important for addressing: intolerance and diversity of perspectives. If someone is intolerant of different people having different perspectives, then they cannot understand how people react differently to different things. When we do this, we make assumptions based on a person s reaction to a situation and do not factor in the fact that we may look at the same situation from completely different perspectives based on our previous life experiences. 6

8 Our class s Talmudic text tells that the townspeople do not tolerate the ugly man s perspective of Rabbi Elazar. The ugly man sees Rabbi Elazar as a person who insulted him, while the townspeople see him as a great teacher. The townspeople, in this instance, were too closed minded to see that the rabbi was acting as an ugly man, while the ugly man was being a teacher. This text can teach others that compromises must be made in order to accept the perspective of another person. The ugly man did, in fact, eventually partly accept the perspective of the townspeople in regards to Rabbi Elazar. However, he was able to hold on to his own perspective also and teach the townspeople an important lesson about perspective. You grant each person with the ability to reason and learn. God, grant us strength and will to put these gifts to use in every situation we encounter. Blessed are you, Adonai our God, who graces us with the ability to accept and forgive. Sacha Gross Open Mindedness is important for addressing: same-sex marriage. People should be more open to gay and lesbian marriage. Those who are closed minded escalate this problem because people are just obsessed with one religious understanding of marriage, and they can only see one way for a marriage to look and cannot accept other forms of marriage. Our class s Talmudic text tells that the rabbi judged the ugly man based on his looks, he didn t see anything beyond his ugliness. When we act closed minded we only see gay or lesbian as other rather than as loving couples who deserves rights. This text can really show us not to judge people by the way they look, but rather by the way they act. In this world there are people who do believe in equal rights for everybody. 7

9 Please God, may the people see the lesbian and gay community as equals to everyone else. Bless are You, who brings blessing to people who are open minded about everybody s equal rights. Lara Nisonoff Open Mindedness is important for addressing homelessness. In society, the homeless community is often looked upon as being unworthy because of their physical demeanor and unfortunate circumstances. Closed mindedness only escalates this problem because without an open mindset, the problem won t go away. In fact, the problem will continue to get worse. By staying soft like a reed we can think more positively about what we can do to positively change the conditions and circumstances the homeless face on a daily basis. By switching the closed mindset that might be our initial reaction, our open mind will motivated us to take the first steps to change the conditions of the homeless. Our class s Talmudic text tells that just as the ugly man was judged by the Rabbi solely on the basis of his physical appearance, so is the homeless community judged because of the way they may look or the poor conditions under which they live. However, the Rabbi was able to quickly switch his mindset when he realized how much he had hurt the man. Even though he was considered to be a wise teacher he too was showing his closed mindedness by reacting to the man s unpleasant physical presence. The Rabbi s strength was shown by his ability to realize his mistake. The Rabbi was able to admit that his initial reaction was completely wrong and that he needed to ask the man for his forgiveness. By remembering to be soft like a reed and not hard like a cedar, he was able to put the situation into perspective and see the man as one of God s children. You grant us with an open world and the ability to come together to share understanding of what we know. We ask you to give us the strength to initiate one good deed each day. Thank You God for giving us the tools and perspectives on the world that allow us to reach out to others and make a difference. 8

10 Confirmation 5770 Declaration of Faith We, the Congregation Emanu-El Confirmation Class of 5770, stand at the foot of Sinai and hear the call of our tradition and our God. The Talmud teaches us to be soft like a reed, not hard like a cedar. This verse challenges us to be open minded about the issues that affect us personally and those around us. These issues include: Fighting Stereotypes Equal Education for Girls Equal Marriage Rights for All Judging a Book by Its Cover Intolerance Embracing a Diversity of Perspectives Homelessness We affirm that Torah, avodah and g milut chasadim help us keep an open mind and connect with our tradition. We hereby use ancient words from Torah to declare our faith: Here O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is One. 9

11 High School Confirmation Program /5770 Congregation Emanu-El of the City of New York Confirmands Lauren Feiner Madeline Finkel Sacha Gross Katie Hartman Molly Hirshik Lara Nisonoff Julia Slaff Samuel Weintraub 10

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