Secrets of Communication and Self Development

Transcription

1 Secrets of Communication and Self Development The following publications highlight Dr. Dilip Abayasekara's remarkable work in the field of speech consultation. They are provided free as our way of saying, "Thank you for touring our site." Our hope is that they will help you achieve your goals for effective public speaking and self development. Dilip Abayasekara, Ph.D., Accredited Speaker is a professional speaker, trainer, and speech coach. His focus, through his training company, Speaker Services Unlimited, is to help people discover their own genius and find their path of fulfillment. Free Articles by Dr. Dilip Abayasekara, Ph.D., A.S. Eight Principles for Powerful Inspirational Speaking In the article titled, Essentials Elements of Effective Inspirational Speaking, I described the foundation of all great inspirational speeches. Now let s discuss, from a speaker s point of view, the eight principles that that are common to highly effective inspirational speakers. 1. The Road to Inspiration Goes Through the Heart Think back to a time when a speaker really inspired you what do you remember? I bet you remember the powerful positive feelings you had. You won t recall facts that the speaker poured into you, but you will remember the warm glow, the wider vision, the glimmering hope that was triggered in your heart. The Irish playwright William Butler Yeats said it so clearly: Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire. Inspiration is the education of the heart. Keeping the above fact in mind, you the speaker will look for speech material that will add tinder and create sparks in the fireplace of the human heart. Absorb these words of former Israeli Prime Minister, Yitzhak Rabin: Yitzhak Rabin, Excerpt from Remarks on the Signing of the Israel-Palestinian Declaration of Principles, Washington, DC, September 13, 1993 We have come from a people, a home, a family, that has not known a single year, not a single month, in which mothers have not wept for their sons. We have come to try and put an end to the hostilities, so that our children, our children s children, will no longer experience the painful cost of war, violence, and terror. We have come to secure their lives and to erase the sorrow and the painful memories of the past to hope and pray for peace. Let me say to you, the Palestinians: We are destined to live together on the same soil, in the same land We, like you, are people who want to build a home, to plant a tree, to love, to live side by side with you in dignity, in empathy, as human beings, as free men. We are today giving peace a chance, and saying again to you: Enough. Let us pray that a day will come when we all will say: Farewell to arms 2. Key In on the Deep Yearnings That Are Common to Your Listeners If you are going to reach your listeners at a deep level, you must address their yearnings. One of the greatest compliments you can receive as an inspirational speaker is that you put into words what the listeners felt but had been unable to articulate. When you, the speaker, do that, you can move your audience; you can command their hearts; and you can rule their minds. It is at those Page 1

2 moments that great good as well as great harm can be done. World War II had two orators, Churchill on one side, and Hitler on the other, using their command of inspirational speaking to effect great good on one side and great harm on the other. Open yourself to these stirring words of Churchill, at the time of Britain s greatest peril: Winston Churchill, Excerpt from Speech to House of Commons, June 18, 1940 The Battle of France is over. I expect that the Battle of Britain is about to begin. Upon this battle depends the survival of Christian civilization. Upon it depends our own British life, and the long continuity of our institutions and our Empire. The whole fury and might of the enemy must very soon be turned on us. Hitler knows that he will have to break us in this Island or lose the war. If we can stand up to him, all Europe may be free and the life of the world may move forward into broad, sunlit uplands. But if we fail, then the whole world, including the United States, including all that we have known and cared for, will sink into the abyss of a new Dark Age made more sinister, and perhaps more protracted, by the lights of perverted science. Let us therefore brace ourselves to our duties, and so bear ourselves, that if the British Empire and its Commonwealth last for a thousand years, men will still say, This was their finest hour. 3. Appeal to the Highest Values of Your Listeners Some years ago, there was a television advertisement for tires that showed a picture of a baby, sitting on a tire, followed by the question, What s riding on your tires? Judging from the many times that advertisement was shown, it must have been very successful. Why was that advertisement able to connect with so many people? In trying to sell tires, the company could have extolled the features and benefits of the materials that go into the making of the tires, it could have cited statistics that showed the number of miles safely driven on those tires by thousands of satisfied customers, or it could have had actors toasting the beauty and value of the tires. Instead, it showed a defenseless human being, a little baby, happily sitting on it, reminding us of one of our highest values children and family. That message would prompt any family member in the market for a new set of tires to put the safety of his family ahead of the price. More important, it would imply an unstated but almost tangible connection between the brand of tire and the safety of families using that brand. It is that same appeal to higher values that is inherent in every great inspirational speech. Such a speech skips the mundane and goes to the core of what is greater than any one individual. As you prepare for your next inspirational speech, ask yourself, What are the values that are most important to my audience? What gives them sublime pride? What gives meaning to their lives? Then work those ideas into your speech, consistent with the theme and the specific purpose of the speech. See how the Great Communicator, President Ronald Reagan, appealed to our highest values at a time of great national pain and sorrow: Ronald Reagan, Excerpt from Address to the nation on the Challenger disaster, Oval Office, January 28, 1986 Nineteen years ago, almost to the day, we lost three astronauts in a terrible accident on the ground. But we've never lost an astronaut in flight; we've never had a tragedy like this. And perhaps we've forgotten the courage it took for the crew of the shuttle; but they, the Challenger Seven, were aware of the dangers, but overcame them and did their jobs brilliantly. We mourn seven heroes: Michael Smith, Dick Scobee, Judith Resnik, Ronald McNair, Ellison Onizuka, Gregory Jarvis, and Christa McAuliffe. We mourn their loss as a nation together. For the families of the seven, we cannot bear, as you do, the full impact of this tragedy. But we feel the loss, and we're thinking about you so very much. Your loved ones were daring Page 2

3 and brave, and they had that special grace, that special spirit that says, "Give me a challenge and I'll meet it with joy." They had a hunger to explore the universe and discover its truths. They wished to serve, and they did. They served all of us And I want to say something to the school children of America who were watching the live coverage of the shuttle's takeoff. I know it is hard to understand, but sometimes painful things like this happen. It's all part of the process of exploration and discovery. It's all part of taking a chance and expanding man's horizons. The future doesn't belong to the fainthearted; it belongs to the brave. The Challenger crew was pulling us into the future, and we'll continue to follow them. I've always had great faith in and respect for our space program, and what happened today does nothing to diminish it. We don't hide our space program. We don't keep secrets and cover things up. We do it all up front and in public. That's the way freedom is, and we wouldn't change it for a minute. We'll continue our quest in space. There will be more shuttle flights and more shuttle crews and yes, more volunteers, more civilians, more teachers in space. Nothing ends here; our hopes and our journeys continue There's a coincidence today. On this day 390 years ago, the great explorer Sir Francis Drake died aboard ship off the coast of Panama. In his lifetime the great frontiers were the oceans, and a historian later said, "He lived by the sea, died on it, and was buried in it." Well, today we can say of the Challenger crew: Their dedication was, like Drake's, complete. The crew of the space shuttle Challenger honored us by the manner in which they lived their lives. We will never forget them, nor the last time we saw them, this morning, as they prepared for their journey and waved good-bye and "slipped the surly bonds of earth" to "touch the face of God." 4. Eloquence Sparks Inspiration Understanding the deep yearnings of your audience members and appealing to their highest values will not make your speech inspirational unless you are eloquent in word choice and language. The use of language that awakens the audience s imagination and moves it in parallel with your speech makes the audience co-creators of your message and they become captured by the emotions the speech evokes. Similes, metaphors, analogies, antitheses, alliteration, repetition, and picturesque speech are powerful tools in the arsenal of the inspirational speaker. When these speech devices are coupled with masterful delivery, the effect can be electrifying. If you doubt me that eloquence must be present for inspiration to occur, listen to a speech by any expert or notable person who is uninspiring. They may have great hearts, a deep understanding of their audiences, and great credibility in their occupations, but if they are unable to string together words that sparkle and deliver the speech with passion, they will leave you uninspired. The best way to describe the inspirational state is passionate eloquence. Passionate eloquence has two components the words in the speech and how those words are delivered. Speeches are meant for the ear, not for the eye, and therefore lose a significant portion of their power when they are read instead of heard. However, when I read any great inspirational speech, I find that I am stirred, moved, and inspired. When I read a speech that lacks this eloquence, it may inform or teach me, but it does not inspire. If feelings are the fuel, passionate eloquence is the spark that sets the bonfire of inspiration ablaze. I invite you to feel the passionate eloquence of the speaker and her message by reading the excerpt below: Excerpt from Remarks of Elizabeth Dole, Republican National Convention, Tuesday, August 1, 2000 I, too, wish to address our nation's security tonight. I speak not of military weapons, but of moral ones, of the defense of values as well as territory. Page 3

4 Before there was an American dream, there was a dream of America as liberty's home and refuge. It was for this, that a million heroes fought and bled and died. Not alone to protect land on a map, much as they might cherish their home and hearth; nor to encroach on other lands or menace other peoples, or impose our way of life on anyone -- but merely, heroically, to ensure freedom's survival in a hostile world. Let us be clear: the success of freedom can never be measured in material terms alone. For one day, each of us will be held to account not for the money we made, but for the difference we made. Not for the worldly status we may have enjoyed, but for the stewardship we provided. Freedom empowers the heart. It levels walls and shatters ceilings -- including glass ceilings. Ladies and gentlemen, in my eight years as President of the American Red Cross, I saw things that will haunt me the rest of my life -- the evil that humans can inflict on one another --saw it in the dim eyes of starving children in Somalia and in the paralyzing grief of parents in Oklahoma City. But I have also been uplifted by the extraordinary power of the American heart -- by those armies of compassion, who are willing to cross town or cross the globe to minister to those they've never met and will never see again. People who go where government cannot, and others will not, who carry our values of peace and democracy around the world, putting service before self. Such kindness and generosity are not legislated by any Congress. They arise from faith, neighborliness, and yes, occasional saintliness. Indeed, I learned long ago that you don't have to be a missionary to be filled with a sense of mission. The 20th century was America's century -- not because of our power, but because of our purpose. Today, millions of Americans -- of both parties and of no party -- are seeking a politics of purpose For these timeless values form our first line of defense. Let this be our mission and our mandate - to defend frontiers of the heart, armed with faith and steeled by conviction. Today, America resembles nothing so much as Joseph s many-colored coat, and in our diversity lies our strength. With that strength comes a matching responsibility -- to make wrong into right hope into reality in the old, biblical words, to let justice roll down like waters and righteousness like a mighty stream. Here, my friends, is the standard we raise. This is the faith of our fathers and mothers, the American cause we hold sacred, our politics of purpose. In the words of that great hymn: America! America! May God thy gold refine, till all success be nobleness and every gain divine! 5. Speak to the Audience Members Not As They Are, but As They Could Be In order to inspire, you must help the audience see themselves as they could be, far beyond any limiting realities of their present struggles. The effective inspirational speaker reminds the listeners of their high calling and challenges them to claim their birthright by rising to live at a higher level. To paraphrase the philosopher Goethe, Treat others not as they are, but as they could be, and they will become who they should be. When expressed with eloquence, sincerity, and passion, such language begins to work on the human heart. Eloquence can sometimes be found in the closing summation of a lawyer before a jury. This is not Page 4

5 surprising. Eloquence is inspiration and inspiration is influence at a deep level. Clarence Darrow ( ) was a lawyer renowned for his eloquence and brilliant legal mind. He was a militant agnostic, an extreme humanitarian, a vociferous opponent of capital punishment, and a fierce defender of the underdog. At the age of sixty-nine, he was the lawyer for the defense in a case to do with a young Black man who had helped defend his home from attack by a White mob which resulted in a White man being killed by a gunshot. We pick up in the closing paragraphs of Darrow s summation before the jury. Excerpts from Speech by Clarence Darrow, Plea to Jury for Justice, Detroit, May 19, 1926 So, gentlemen, I am justified in saying, that this boy is as kindly, as well disposed, as decent a man as one of you twelve. Do you think he ought to be taken out of school and sent to the penitentiary? All right, gentlemen, if you think so, do it. It is your job, not mine. If you think so, do it. But if you do, gentlemen, if you should ever look into the face of your own boy, or your own brother, or look into your own heart, you will regret it in sackcloth and ashes. You know, if he committed any offense, it was being loyal and true to his brother whom he loved. I know where you will send him and it will not be to a penitentiary. Now, gentlemen, just one more word, and I am through with this case. I do not live in Detroit. But I have no feeling against this city. In fact, I shall always have the kindest remembrance of it, especially if this case results as I think and fell it will. I am the last one to come here to stir up race hatred, or any other hatred. I do not believe in the law of hate. I may not be true to my ideals always, but I believe in the law of love, and I believe you can do nothing with hatred. I would like to see a time when man loves his fellow man and forgets his color or his creed. We will never be civilized until that time comes. I know that the Negro race has a long road to go. I believe that the life of the Negro race has been a life of tragedy, of injustice, of oppression. The law has made him equal, but man has not. And, after all, the last analysis is: what has man done? and not what has the law done? I know that there is a long road ahead of him before he can take the place, which I believe he should take. I know that before him there is sorrow, tribulation, and death among the blacks, and perhaps the whites. I am sorry. I would do what I could to avert it. I would advise patience; I would advise tolerance; I would advise understanding; I would advise all these things which are necessary for men who live together. Gentlemen, what do you think of your duty in this case? I have watched day after day these black, tense faces that have crowded this court. These black faces that are now looking to you twelve whites, feeling that the hopes and fears of a race are in your keeping. This case is about to end, gentlemen. To them, it is life. Not one of their color sits in this jury. Their fate is in the hands of twelve whites. Their eyes are fixed on you, their hearts go out to you, and their hopes hang on your verdict. This is all. I ask you, on behalf of this defendant, on behalf of these helpless ones who turn to you, and more than that on behalf of this great state, and this great city, which must face this problem and face it fairly I ask you, in the name of progress and of the human race, to return a verdict of not guilty in this case! [The jury quickly returned a verdict for acquittal. Judge Frank Murphy, as he left the bench, said to a friend This is the greatest experience of my life. That was Clarence Darrow at his best. I will never hear anything like that again. He is the most Christ-like man I have ever met.] 6. Be on Fire with Enthusiasm for Your Audience and Your Message There s an old saying about sales jobs, which goes, If you are not on fire with enthusiasm, you may be fired with enthusiasm! The same thing could be said of inspirational speakers. Page 5

6 First, the inspirational speaker must be enthusiastic about his or her audience. You must believe in the potential and the possibilities of your audience. Believe in them, feel their yearnings, and see their greatness. Second, be sold on the message you are sharing with your audience. If you are not sold on it, if you are not fired up with enthusiasm for what you are sharing, your message will merely be words but will not inspire. Enthusiasm is needed for both your audience and your message. When you have a deep belief and enthusiasm for your audience and your message, your inner beliefs will be transparently conveyed to them in your body language and your tone of voice. According to many research studies, 93% of the believability of a message stems from a combination of the visual cues of the speaker and the vocal nuances of the speakers voice. These visual cues and vocal nuances can t be easily consciously controlled. They spill out from the internal attitudes of the speaker and connect with the audience. So if you want to inspire your audience, first get inspired! Consider some of the great inspirational speakers of our day: Zig Ziglar, Les Brown, Jim Rohn, Brian Tracy, Patricia Fripp, Mark Sanborn, Toastmasters World Champion speakers and others you will see that although their areas of specialty may differ, they are always fired up with enthusiasm for their audiences and their messages. 7. Connect the Audience with Great Themes Speeches are inspirational because they touch on great themes that cause listeners to feel deeply and emotionally move toward greatness. Following are twenty-two themes that I have run across in great inspirational speeches: Destiny Calling Heritage Forebears Pioneers -- Courage Freedom/Liberty Service Sacrifice Birthright Heroes Love of Country/Organization/Family Human Race Humanity Charity Vision/Dreams Greatness Unity Values Significance Spirit God s Blessings If you want to make your speech soar to inspirational heights, the speech must move the audience from mundane matters to great and noble feelings that connect them to greatness. When Theodore (Ted) Sorensen wrote the inaugural speech for President John F. Kennedy, he was very much aware of how ideas expressed with eloquence, touching on great themes, and calling on noble impulses could inspire an audience. John Kennedy s passionate delivery of that speech made it go down in the annals of inspirational inaugural speeches as one of the great ones. John F. Kennedy -- Excerpt from Inaugural Address. Washington, DC, January 20, 1961 Vice President Johnson, Mr. Speaker, Mr. Chief Justice, President Eisenhower, Vice President Nixon, President Truman, reverend clergy, fellow citizens, we observe today not a victory of party, but a celebration of freedom symbolizing an end, as well as a beginning signifying renewal, as well as change. For I have sworn before you and Almighty God the same solemn oath our forebears prescribed nearly a century and three quarters ago. The world is very different now. For man holds in his mortal hands the power to abolish all forms of human poverty and all forms of human life. And yet the same revolutionary beliefs for which our forebears fought are still at issue around the globe -- the belief that the rights of man come not from the generosity of the state, but from the hand of God. We dare not forget today that we are the heirs of that first revolution. Let the word go forth from this time and place, to friend and foe alike, that the torch has been passed to a new generation of Americans born in this century, tempered by war, disciplined by a hard and bitter peace, proud of our ancient heritage and unwilling to witness or permit the slow undoing of those human rights to which this Nation has always been committed, and to which we are committed today at home and around the world. Page 6

7 Let every nation know, whether it wishes us well or ill, that we shall pay any price, bear any burden, meet any hardship, support any friend, oppose any foe, in order to assure the survival and the success of liberty. This much we pledge and more 8. Leave the Audience on a High The conclusion of your speech is the last opportunity you have to reinforce your message and move your audience. Listeners have a tendency to remember the first thing they hear and the last thing they hear. This fact gives added importance to the introduction and the conclusion of your speech. Most speakers spend some time planning the beginning of their speech but they sometimes undo the good they ve done during the speech by giving a poor ending that sabotages or weakens the speech purpose. If you want to make your speech inspirational, it is vital that you plan your speech ending purposefully. During the body of your speech, you may have made the audience feel deep emotions, made them laugh, and made them cry. Humor has its place but entertainment is just that: it cannot substitute for inspiration. Although you may make the audience sad during the body of the speech, the emotion of sadness does not usually inspire people. A tried and tested formula is, If you take the audience down (in emotion), bring them back up before you end the speech. How do you leave the audience on a high? Here are some proven ways: Build to a crescendo of feeling Use a song or poem that is appropriate and inspiring Involve the audience in vocalizing an inspiring sentiment such as love of freedom, country, etc. Challenge the audience to act on the great and noble sentiments that you have stirred up Re-state the inspiring theme of your speech and ask for a commitment from your audience A classic example of leaving the audience on a high can be found in Martin Luther King s famous I Have a Dream Speech. Consider the conclusion: Martin Luther King, Jr., Conclusion of I Have a Dream, Lincoln Memorial, Washington, DC, August 28, 1963 This will be the day when all of God's children will be able to sing with a new meaning, "My country, 'tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the pilgrim's pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring." And if America is to be a great nation this must become true. So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania! Let freedom ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado! Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California! But not only that; let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia! Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee! Page 7

8 Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring. And when this happens, When we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, "Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!" Apply these eight principles to your inspirational speaking and you will be counted among the great because you inspire others to greatness and then you will have earned the speaker s greatest reward: the knowledge that you have contributed to enriching and ennobling life [For further information on inspirational speaking, see Dr. Dilip Abayasekara s articles titled, Essential Elements of Effective Inspirational Speaking and Motivational Speaking versus Inspirational Speaking ] Dilip Abayasekara, Ph.D., Accredited Speaker, is a professional speaker, trainer, and speech coach. His focus, through his training company, Speaker Services Unlimited, is to help people discover their own genius and find their path of fulfillment. Dr. Abayasekara is also an adjunct faculty member of Central Pennsylvania College in Oral Communications and is an adjunct faculty member of Eastern University's School of Professional Studies in the area of Managerial and Interpersonal Communications. He is the author of the book, The Path of the Genie, Your Journey to Your Heart s Desire. In he served as President of Toastmasters International, the world's leading organization that helps people improve their communication and leadership skills. Dr. Dilip, as he is known to most clients, specializes in private speech coaching. Among his clients have been company presidents, business executives, university professors, scientists, engineers, physicians, elected city officials, members of the clergy, leaders of volunteer organization, and speech contestants. Dr. Dilip Abayasekara PO Box 405, Enola, PA Ph: drdilip@drdilip.com Web Site: Page 8