Marriage In Islam MUFTI FARAZ ADAM AL-MAHMUDI

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1 Marriage In Islam MUFTI FARAZ ADAM AL-MAHMUDI

2 Importance of Learning About Marriage Recent study shows 1 in every 4 couples are no longer in love Rights are left unfulfilled and neglected Importance of Studying about Marriage Domestic violence and abuse Divorce rates are higher than ever

3 Why Should I Marry? Marriage is worship Marriage is a Sunnah of the Prophets Natural need of a human Children Means of chastity Celibacy is prohibited in Islam

4 Why Some Evade Marriage Why some do not marry 1) Do not want commitment 2) Do not want responsibilities 3) Really fussy in choosing 4) Career is more beloved 5) Society and custom stops them 6) Suffering from inferiority complex

5 What To Look For in A Spouse Piety Similar mindset Good Character Similar lifestyles Loving Looks

6 7 Steps To Finding A Spouse Work upon yourself - Advance in your closeness to Allah and improve your character Make dua' Put yourself in the limelight- speak to parents, scholars, friends and relatives Thorough homework on any prospective spouses Istikharah Make the move - One should adopt the most modest and genuine manner when 'putting a word across' Look at the prospective spouse.

7 Duas To Read When Looking For a Spouse / ا لية )201 ر ب ن ا آت ن ا ف ي الد ن ي ا ح س ن ة و ف ي ا ل خ ر ة ح س ن ة و ق ن ا ع ذ اب الن ار )سورة البقرة Translation: Oh Allah! Grant us goodness in this world and goodness in the Hereafter and protect us from the punishment of the Hellfire ر ب إ ن ي ل م ا أ ن ز ل ت إ ل ي م ن خ ي ر ف ق ير )سورة القصص/ ا لية 24( O My Lord! I am in need of all goodness you give to me. ا لية 74( ر ب ن ا ه ب ل ن ا م ن أ ز و اج ن ا و ذ ر ي ات ن ا ق ر ة أ ع ي ن و اج ع ل ن ا ل ل م ت ق ين إ م ام ا )سورة الفرقان/ "Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous."

8 Looking At A Prospective Spouse Go and look at her, for there is something in the eyes of the Ansar. (Muslim) Look at her, for it may produce love between you. (Tirmidhi) When one of you proposes to a woman for marriage, then if he is able to look at what will induce him to marry her, he should do so. (Abu Dawud)

9 Istikharah Istikhārah is to seek good from Allah. Istikhārah is not a coin toss! Istikhārah is not dependent on dreams Istikhārah is merely asking Allah for good in whatever you decide.

10 The Istikharah Supplication الل ه م إ ن ي أ س ت خ ير ك ب ع ل م ك و أ س ت ق د ر ك ب ق د ر ت ك و أ س أ ل ك م ن ف ض ل ك الع ظ يم ف إ ن ك ت ق در و ال أ ق د ر و ت ع ل م و ال أ ع ل م و أ ن ت ع ل م الغ ي وب الل ه م إ ن ك ن ت ت ع ل م أ ن ه ذ ا األ م ر خ ي ر ل ي ف ي د ين ي و م ع اش ي و ع اق ب ة أ م ر ف اق د ر ه ل ي و ي س ر ه ل ي ث م ب ار ك ل ي ف يه و إ ن ك ن ت ت ع ل م أ ن ه ذ ا األ م ر ش ر ل ي ف ي د ين ي و م ع اش ي و ع اق ب ة أ م ر ف اص ر ف ه عن ي واص ر ف ن ي ع ن ه و اق د ر ل ي الخ ي ر ح ي ث ك ان ث م أ ر ض ن ي Translation: O Allah! I seek from You a decision by virtue of Your Knowledge (of what is best), and I seek from You the ability (to realize my object) by virtue of Your Power, and I ask You (to grant me) from Your Great Bounty, for indeed You have power and I do not have power, and You know and I do not know, and You are the Knower of the unseen. Oh Allah! If, according you Your Knowledge, this matter is good for me with regards to my religious affairs, my worldly life and my final outcome (i.e. in the Hearafter), then direct it towards me and ease it for me, thereafter grant me blessing in it. And if according to Your Knowledge, this matter is evil for me with regards to my religious affairs, my worldly life and my final outcome (i.e. Hearafter), then turn it away from me and turn me away from it. And direct towards me that which is good, no matter where it is, thereafter make me pleased with it (i.e. that good.)

11 Engagement Engagement is merely an agreement and promise to marry in the near future. Engagement is does not permit interaction between the engaged.

12 How A Nikah Is Complete In Islam Offer and Acceptance Witnesses Nikah

13 The Common Dower/Mahr al-mahr al-fatimi: Mahr Fatimi is that dowry stipulated for Sayyidah Fatima radhiallahu anha. The preferred opinion is that the amount was 480 Dirhams. Mahr al-azwāj al-nabī (Mahr of Wives of Rasulullah salallahu alayhi wasallam): The Mahr Rasulullah salallahu alayhi wasallam gave to his wives. The value is calculated at 500 dirhams of silver.

14 Zakat & Mahr Indices -Updated Daily 35 Major World Currencies

15 Walimah The Messenger of Allah salallahu alayhi wasallam said (to Abdur Rahman ibn Awf): May Allah bless you (in your marriage), offer a feast, even if it is only with a goat. (Sahih al-bukhari no. 4872) The groom is responsible to provide the Walīmah.

16 How To Be An Ideal Spouse Know the feelings and thoughts of your spouse The Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam was telling Sayyidah Aisha radhiallahu anha : "I know well when you are pleased or angry with me. Aisha replied: How you know that? He said: When you are pleased with me you swear by saying "By the God of Mohammad" but when you are angry you swear by saying "By the God of Ibrahim". She said: You are right, I don t mention your name. (Sahih al-bukhārī) Console and support Sayyidah Safiyah radhiallahu anha was on a journey with the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam. She was late so the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam received her while she was crying. The Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam wiped her tears with his own hands and tried his utmost to calm her down. (al-sunan al-kubrā) Be loving and romantic The Prophet salallahu alaihi wasallam would recline in the lap of our beloved mother Sayyidah Aisha radaillahu anha even in the state when she would be menstruating. (Sahih al-bukhārī) The Prophet salallahu alaihi wasallam would recite the Qur ān whilst reclining in his wife s lap. (Sahih al-bukhārī) The Prophet salallahu alaihi wasallam would put his lips on the very same place his beloved wife drank from. He would then drink the contents of the cup. (Nasa i)

17 How To Be An Ideal Spouse Help at home! The Prophet salallahu alaihi wasallam would clean and help at home. He would see to his needs himself rather than demanding his wife. He would clean and see to his clothing himself. (Sahih Ibn Hibban) Spend time together The Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam would go for walk at night with his beloved wife. (Sahih al-bukhārī) Play and have fun with spouse The Prophet salallahu alaihi wasallam would exercise and play with his wife also. The famous incident of the Prophet salallahu alaihi wasallam challenging his wife to race is well known.

18 How To Be An Ideal Spouse Dress for your spouse Sayyiduna Ibn Abbās radiallahu anhu said: "As my wife adorns herself for me, I adorn myself for her. (Musannaf Ibn Abi Shaybah) Smell nice The Prophet salallahu alaihi wasallam would have a container for perfume. He would use perfume constantly. (Abu Dawud) Protect the secrets of your spouse The Prophet salallahu alaihi wasallam described the one who discloses his wife s affairs to others as amongst the worst of people. (Sahih Muslim) Love and respect your in-laws The Prophet salallahu alaihi wasallam was once asked whom he loved the most. He replied, Aisha. When the questioner rephrased his question and asked from amongst the men, he replied, Her father.

19 Session 2 Talaq (Divorce)

20 What Is Talaq? Ṭalāq Amputation

21 Factors Leading To Talaq Conflict & discord Domestic violence disobeying & opposing spouse Financial disagree ments A lack of intimacy and love between the spouses Lack of compatibility Ṭalāq Answering back by spouse

22 Qur anic Guidelines To Prevent Divorce speech! - Communicate with positive ف ع ظ وه ن Temporary physical separation - و اه ج ر وه ن ف ي ال م ض اج ع - Light discipline و اض ر ب وه ن - Mediation ح ك م ا م ن أ ه ل ه و ح ك م ا م ن أ ه ل ه ا - Settlement with ف ل ج ن اح ع ل ي ه م ا أ ن ي ص ل ح ا ب ي ن ه م ا ص ل ح ا ultimatum

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