Real Wisdom A Look Into Proverbs

Transcription

1 Real Wisdom A Look Into Proverbs Lesson Two Proverbs 4 Wise Children and Parents In our first lesson, we broke introductory ground in our studies in Proverbs. We saw that the purpose of Proverbs was to bring wisdom, instruction, and understanding, which will give us prudence, discretion, and knowledge for our daily lives. Anyone, whether they are young, simple minded, or already growing in wisdom, can benefit from taking these truths to heart. The heart of Proverbs itself is the fear of God. Only a fool will despise the wisdom He has for us. Proverbs 1 also introduced us to: 1. The dangers of evil. 2. The dangers of giving into temptations we find all around us. 3. The dangers of compromise or succumbing to worldly pressures. The warnings of Wisdom, personified as a woman, beckoned us to seek wisdom and have the Spirit poured out in our lives to lead us in the words and the ways of wisdom. Those who reject God s wisdom have little to hope for, once it is too late. Whoever listens to and applies God s wisdom to their daily situations will dwell safely, being secure, and without fear of the things of this world as we learn to truly fear the Lord! This week we are turning to our first topical study, covering the parent-child relationship. There is little else more important in this life than being the type of parent we are called to be, and for children to be responsive to their end of the relationship as well. Oswald Chambers well said, The greatest benefits conferred on human life, fatherhood, motherhood, childhood, home, become the greatest curse if Jesus Christ is not the head. 1 Let s seek God s wisdom now toward being wise children and parents. Day One: A Father s Instruction Please carefully read Proverbs 4:1-9 and answer the following questions. 1. Several passages in Proverbs address the parent-child relationship. What admonition did Solomon give to his son, and why (verses 1-2)? Note: Good doctrine has been translated elsewhere as sound teaching ( NASB ), good guidance ( NLT ), or sound learning ( NIV ). 2. What example did Solomon himself learn from, and what message did he glean for himself and his own children (verses 3-4)? 3. How did David intensely charge Solomon in 1 Chronicles 28:9-10? 1

2 4. What urgency did Solomon share in instructing his own son in God s wisdom (verses 5-7)? Notes: The Message well paraphrases verse 5 as Sell everything and buy wisdom! Forage for understanding! Don t forget one word! Don t deviate an inch! The principle thing refers to the beginning of wisdom (NASB), the most important thing you can do (NLT); in the Hebrew it is actually just one word meaning first in rank, time, place dignity, a starting place and not the ending, but a beginning What will be the results for those who make wisdom their pursuit, and likewise instruct their children (verses 8-9)? Note: We should be instructing our children to prize and esteem wisdom ( NASB, NIV ), to throw your arms around her ( THE MESSAGE ). 6. What does Proverbs 17:6 also add about this? Scripture Memory: This week we will be memorizing Proverbs 4:11. Review the passage several times throughout each day and by the end of the week, you should have it memorized completely. I have taught you in the way of wisdom; I have led you in right paths. (Proverbs 4:11 NKJV ) Day Two: A Father s Impartation Please carefully read Proverbs 4:10-13 and answer the following questions. 1. What else will be the benefit of imparting godly wisdom to our children (verse 10)? What does this mean? Note: Receive means to listen to, accept, or literally, to take hold of something In what two-fold way are parents to impart God s wisdom to their children according to verse 11? Notes: Taught means to lay a foundation, establish, also aiming and controlling something or someone. Led means to walk and tread along with, and comes from a word meaning to string a bow What further confidence will our children have as we both teach and lead them in the ways of wisdom (verse 12)? 2

3 Note: The NLT translates this verse, If you live a life guided by wisdom, you won t limp or stumble as you run. Hindered literally means narrowed and cramped by the crooked paths of sin.v 4. How important is it for our children to receive this type of instruction (verse 13)? Note: Take firm hold means to be bound fast, to attach, be firm and valiant, and is frequently used to describe an attitude in the midst of battle scenes. 5. God related through Moses some important truths about imparting the ways and the words of wisdom to our children. According to these selected verses in Deuteronomy 6, what should we be teaching our children: About making Him preeminent (verses 4-5): The extent we should proclaim His ways (verses 6-7): To establish reminders of His Word in their lives (verses 8-9): Scripture Memory: By memory, try to fill in the missing words in the blanks, and then review the passage several times today. I have taught you in the way of ; I have led you in paths. (Proverbs 4:11 NKJV) Day Three: The Child s Response Please carefully read the passages below and answer the following questions. 1. The child also has a responsibility to respond to God s Word and His ways of wisdom. How did Solomon exhort his son in this, and what would the results of this be (see Proverbs 3:1-2)? Note: The Hebrew word forget means to misplace, be oblivious to something from lack of memory or attention; 6 it is referring to the child deliberately forgetting, not just a lapse of memory. 7 Keep means guard, protect, and maintain, or to besiege like a city. 2. What kind of impact can a child s response to the wise instructions of his or her parents have, both good and bad? Proverbs 10:1 Proverbs 15:20 Proverbs 17:25 3

4 Notes: Makes glad means to brighten up, make joyful and cause rejoicing. 8 Grief means depression of spirit, grief, heaviness, and sorrow What further warning does Proverbs 13:1 and 15:5 give children about their response to a father s instructions? Note: The Message paraphrases Proverbs 15:5 as Moral dropouts won t listen to their elders; welcoming correction is a mark of good sense. 4. What else does Proverbs 19:26-27 warn those children who choose to disobey or ignore God s Word and their parents guidance? 5. What further calling is given to children to practice the things their godly parents instruct them in (see Proverbs 23:22-23)? 6. What effect does a child s godly and wise choices produce in the hearts of their parents (see Proverbs 23:24-25)? Scripture Memory: By memory, try to fill in the missing words in the blanks, and then review the passage several times today. I have you in the way of ; I have you in paths. (Proverbs 4:11 NKJV ) Day Four: Biblical Discipline Please carefully read the passages below and answer the following questions. As parents, we can imitate our heavenly Father in disciplining our own children. It also helps to prepare our children for their adult lives, for when they will leave the home. It takes a balance in our approach to discipline effectively, giving them room to grow. Let s see what Proverbs tells us about wise discipline. 1. What attitude should we have when undergoing the training God gives us (see Proverbs 3:11)? Notes: Despise means to reject or ignore; it is something that flows or runs out and is loathsome, and is the same term describing Job s loathsome sores. Detest means to be disgusted, feeling displeasure and alarm, a deep emotional reaction of revulsion. 4

5 2. What do we need to realize about God s discipline, and our discipline of our own children (see Proverbs 3:12)? 3. What important truth did Solomon relate about disciplining our children in Proverbs 13:24? What does Proverbs 19:18 add to this? Notes: Discipline means punishment, chastisement, correction, instruction, always for the purpose of educating, and is often oral, not just corporal in nature. Promptly has been translated diligently ( NASB ), carefully ( NIV ), and quickly ( KJV ). The main idea is to do it early on after a violation; literally be up at dawn, earnestly and diligently. 10 Do not set your heart on his destruction has been translated you ll ruin their lives ( NLT ) and don t be a willing party to his death ( NIV ). 4. In what positive ways can we discipline and train our children according to Proverbs 22:6? Notes: This is one of those passages in Proverbs that is generalized, not necessarily a guaranteed promise. Train up means literally to dedicate. It is setting aside, warning, hedging in, away from sin and toward godliness, starting them in the right direction and preparing them for the future. 11 The way he should go is literally according to his way, what is proper for the child. Perhaps this verse could be translated train a child in a manner befitting a child, and even as he grows old he will not turn from it What does Proverbs 23:13-16 tell us about the process and product of godly discipline? 6. What else does Proverbs 29:15, 17 add to all this? Scripture Memory: Try to fill in the missing words in the blanks below, by memory if at all possible, and then review the passage several times today. I have you in the of ; I have you in. (Proverbs 4:11 NKJV ) Day Five: New Testament Parallels Please carefully read the passages below and answer the following questions. 1. As we saw on Day One, we learn to properly discipline our own children through experiencing how God deals with us as His. The author of Hebrews expanded in Proverbs 3:11-12 to describe the parallels between earthly fathers and our Heavenly Father. What important thing does Hebrews 12:5-8 relate to us in the area of discipline? What does Revelation 3:19 also remind us? 5

6 2. What is going to be the product of godly discipline in our lives and the lives of our children (see Hebrews 12:9-11)? 3. The Apostle Paul also wrote extensively about the family relationship in Ephesians and Colossians. After discussing the roles of husbands and wives, he turned his focus onto the parent-child relationship. How did Paul direct children about their own responsibilities? What does that mean to you (see Ephesians 6:1-3; Colossians 3:20)? 4. What are fathers in particular challenged to avoid, and to do instead (see Ephesians 6:4, Colossians 3:21)? Note: Provoke means to cause the child to begin to seethe with anger, resentment, and irritation; to goad them on to resentment. 13 To bring them up means to nourish and feed them, letting them be kindly cherished. 14 Discipline of our children begins with self-discipline. 5. The greatest tool at our disposal in disciplined training of our children is the living Word of God. How was Timothy raised and disciplined by his godly mother and grandmother (see 2 Timothy 1:5; 3:14-15)? 6. How will the Scriptures prove to be invaluable in training and disciplining our children (2 Timothy 3:16-17)? 6

7 Scripture Memory: Can you write out this week s passage by memory here? Give it a try and keep reviewing the passage several times throughout the day. Proverbs 4:11: Day Six Wise Walking 1. These passages are convicting for parent and child alike! A father first has to instruct his children in the ways and words of wisdom. This insures that they can t claim that they hadn t been taught to acquire Wisdom, to embrace and love her, and not forsake the ways she teaches. What are some practical ways that you, as a parent, can instruct your children in the words and ways of wisdom? What are some creative ideas about how to do this in an everyday setting? As Deuteronomy 6:7 exhorts: You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. ( NKJV ) Record some of your thoughts and personal experiences here, and then brainstorm together with your group on how to better do this. 2. The father is not just to be an instructor, but an imparter not just saying do as I say, but demonstrating do as I do. Can you say to your children today, Imitate me, just as I also imitate Christ (1Corinthians 11:1 NKJV )? Are you aiming their lives toward the goal, laying the foundation of a godly example before them? What are some areas of your life that need refining to be more of the parent God has called you to be? How can your group pray for you in this? 3. The child does have responsibility in all this. We are called to faithfully train up the child in the way he is to go, trust him to the Lord s care, and work to keep on that path. Even as adults, we need to set an example for our kids in honoring our own parents, or their memory if they are no longer with us. What are some practical ways we can set an example for them in showing honor to our own parents? What if your parents lives were indeed lacking honor, not leading you in ways that were godly? How can you be different in view of your own children? 7

8 4. R. Kent Hughes, in his book Disciplines of a Godly Man, has an excellent chapter on the Discipline of Fatherhood. xv He pointed out the serious danger of exasperating or provoking our children to the point that we potentially can drive them away from, rather than toward, the type of person God wants them to be. Think about these common mistakes fathers make, and list here how you can avoid them in your own parenting: Being overly critical, bringing them to discouragement: Being overly strict and controlling: Being irritable, letting our pressures interfere: Being inconsistent with them: Showing favoritism toward one child over another: 5. Lastly, we should discuss Proverbs 22:6 a little more. Many parents cling to this verse when they have children who stray from the Lord, hoping that the promise of this verse will bring their children back to Him. Yet as we saw, the passage is a generalization, not a specific guarantee. There is nothing more tragic to us than when a child willingly turns from the path of wise Christian living. There are two things you can do to find relief when your child rebels against the ways of God. One is to be assured that you have done all you can to let them know the way of righteousness and the gospel. Have you clearly done that for each of your children? Can you stand like Paul and say, For I have not shunned to declare to you the whole counsel of God (Acts 20:27 NKJV)? The second thing is committing them over to the Lord in regular prayer for their salvation or rededication to Him and His ways. Our children can run from us and our commitment to Christ, but they sure can t escape our prayers and the planted seeds God is working on in their hearts. Let s take on a prayer project this year in our groups: If you have a prodigal child, maybe more than one, let s pray as a group for them throughout this year, and see what happens in their lives. Let s not forget to pray for one another s children who are walking with the Lord, and ask Him to make us all the better fathers, husbands, and examples to all of those around us. List your children s names here, a request for their specific situation, and share it with your group. 8

9 Scripture Memory: Hopefully you now can write out this week s passage completely by memory. Do so now, and keep on reviewing it so you will be ready to share it with others in your group time. Proverbs 4:11: NOTES 1 John Blanchard, Sifted Silver (Darlington, England: Evangelical Press, 1995), p Unless otherwise noted, word definitions in this study are based on Spiros Zodhiates, ed., The Complete Word Study Old Testament (Chattanooga, Tenn.: AMG Publishers, 1994), and in order the definitions can be found on pp. 2364, 2323, 2314, 2342, 2329, 2361, 2330, James Strong, A Concise Dictionary of the Words in the Hebrew Bible with Their Renderings in the Authorized English Version, in Strong s Exhaustive Concordance of the Bible (Nashville: Abingdon, 1890 Reprint), p Ibid, p Sid S. Buzzell, Proverbs, in The Bible Knowledge Commentary Old Testament, ed. John F. Walvoord and Roy B. Zuck (Wheaton, Ill.: Victor Books/SP Publications, 1985), p Strong, A Concise Dictionary, p Charles Bridges, Proverbs, in The Crossway Classic Commentary Series, ed. Alistair McGrath and J. I. Packer (Wheaton, Ill.: Crossway Books, 2001), p Strong, A Concise Dictionary, p Ibid., p Strong, A Concise Dictionary, p Buzzell, Proverbs, p Duane A. Garrett, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, Song of Solomon, in The New American Commentary, vol. 14, ed. E. R. Clenedon (Nashville: Broadman Press, 1993), p R. Kent Hughes, Disciplines of a Godly Man (Wheaton, Ill.: Crossway Books, 1991), p Ibid., p Ibid., pp by Harvest Christian Fellowship. All rights reserved. Written by Thomas Klock 9