Lesson 2 10 May Harmonious Interpersonal Relationships

Transcription

1 Lesson 2 10 May 2015 Harmonious Interpersonal Relationships Lesson Scope: Colossians 3:18-4:18 Unless otherwise stated all references are from Colossians Lesson Focus Being risen with Christ gives the believer a new perspective of his fellow men. Harmonious homelife, a God-conscious society, and a unified brotherhood become goals for every Christian. Amiable relationships give evidence that we have been born again. "He that saith he is in the light, and hateth his brother, is in darkness even until now" (1 John 2:9). Paul addressed the matter of relationships by highlighting the weaknesses peculiar to those in various levels of responsibility. The same weaknesses are issues today. Every member of the brotherhood is called to "be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility" (1 Peter 5:5). When such attitudes prevail among believers, relationships will thrive. Being risen with Christ governs every aspect of the believer's life. In the home, in society, and in the brotherhood, the Christian relates to others in an honorable, edifying manner. We should not be surprised when relationships are tested. Since this challenge is normal, the Scriptures include many references to forgiveness and forbearance. Even born-again people must choose to get along. It does not happen without conscious effort. Let us always beware of the doctrine of toleration. Surrendering personal ideas and convictions for the sake of peace may never cross established Biblical boundaries. Genuine love speaks the truth even when that is a painful rebuke for erring from the right way. Love serves others, even when we do not feel like it and beyond what we could do in our own strength. "Not by word of lip, full often, / Is the world convinced of truth, / But the deed of loving service, / From the heart, brings fullest proof." Lesson Aim: To examine the Gospel standard for wholesome interpersonal relationships.

2 Theme Verse: Romans 14:19. Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify another. Lesson Text In the Home Colossians 3: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them. 20 Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. 21 Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. In Society Colossians 3: Servants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh; not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but in singleness of heart, fearing God: 23 And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; 24 Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ. 25 But he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done: and there is no respect of persons. Colossians 4:1-6 1 Masters, give unto your servants that which is just and equal; knowing that ye also have a Master in heaven. 2 Continue in prayer, and watch in the same with thanksgiving; 3 Withal praying also for us, that God would open unto us a door of utterance, to speak the mystery of Christ, for which I am also in bonds: 4 That I may make it manifest, as I ought to speak. 5 Walk in wisdom toward them that are without, redeeming the time. 6 Let your speech be alway with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man. In the Brotherhood Colossians 4: All my state shall Tychicus declare unto you, who is a beloved brother, and a faithful minister and fellowservant in the Lord: 8 Whom I have sent unto you for the same purpose, that he might know your estate, and comfort your hearts; 9 With Onesimus, a faithful and beloved brother, who is one of you. They shall make known unto you all things which are done here. 10 Aristarchus my fellowprisoner saluteth you, and Marcus, sister's son to Barnabas, (touching whom ye received commandments: if he come unto you, receive him ;) 11 And Jesus, which is called Justus, who are of the circumcision. These only are

3 my fellowworkers unto the kingdom of God, which have been a comfort unto me. 12 Epaphras, who is one of you, a servant of Christ, saluteth you, always labouring fervently for you in prayers, that ye may stand perfect and complete in all the will of God. 13 For I bear him record, that he hath a great zeal for you, and them that are in Laodicea, and them in Hierapolis. 14 Luke, the beloved physician, and Demas, greet you. 15 Salute the brethren which are in Laodicea, and Nymphas, and the church which is in his house. 16 And when this epistle is read among you, cause that it be read also in the church of the Laodiceans; and that ye likewise read the epistle from Laodicea. 17 And say to Archippus, Take heed to the ministry which thou hast received in the Lord, that thou fulfil it. 18 The salutation by the hand of me Paul. Remember my bonds. Grace be with you. Amen. Questions for Study In the Home 1. Describe the nature of submission and the role of love in a Christian home. 2. How does a solid Christian home affect the development of children? 3. How might fathers provoke their children to anger? In Society 4. What are "eyeservice" and "singleness of heart" (3:22)? 5. What are some Gospel standards for employer employee relationships? 6. What does it mean to "walk in wisdom toward them that are without"? In the Brotherhood 7. How does open communication promote unity among believers? 8. What church-building attitudes are evident in this passage? Analyzing the Passage The believers' interest in good interpersonal relationships is based on 3: Brethren collaborate to build the Lord's church and will be accountable if relationship difficulties hinder their progress. Paul instructed wives to be submissive and husbands to be loving. These tend to be specific points of need. Husbands also need to submit, and wives need to love. Since the home is foundational to other rela-

4 tionships, it is imperative that these qualities are established there. Servants and masters at the time of Paul's writing referred to slaves and slaveholders. In our day, however, it is fair to apply these admonitions to employer employee relationships. This Scripture implies that some brethren will employ others in the brotherhood. This need not produce social or spiritual inequality. In 4:7-9 Paul went to great lengths to inform others what he was doing and to tell others what they ought to do. God-fearing church leaders communicate openly and freely with their members, welcoming questions and concerns. Members need to welcome questions and concerns from their leaders as well. Demas (4:14) reappears in 2 Timothy 4 as one who fell away, "having loved this present world." Principles and Applications In the Home 1. Submission by the wife and love by the husband are God's order for Christian homes (3:18-19). Wives are called to submit to their husbands as the church submits to Christ. The key to making submission enjoyable is reverence (Ephesians 5:33). Submission implies that someone is giving direction and someone else is giving in to what he or she might not have chosen. Submission is not slavery or inferiority. It is simply standing in God's assigned position. A wife's submission includes trusting her husband's judgment and supporting and defending his decisions as it is fit in the Lord. Submission is a grace that gives dignity to all Christian women. The Christian husband holds his wife in high esteem, as queen of his heart and home. To love his wife as Christ loves the church puts a husband under heavy obligation. Every husband's native selfishness must be countered, by God's grace, with a choice to sacrifice his own interests for the good of his wife. True love lives to give. Love takes time to listen and encourage, to help tend the children, and to assist when the housework is overwhelming. A husband who showers love and support on his wife will likely discover that she adores and reverences him. When things are going well at home, we can better weather outward storms. 2. For God to bless homelife, children must be required to obey their

5 parents (3:20). Christian parents teach their children what is right and then require right conduct. Beginning this teaching and discipline very early in a child's life gives him an emotional security that contributes greatly to his spiritual and intellectual development. Even upperteenage children should not be free to make all their own choices, but they are called to voluntarily obey their parents. 3. Fathers are to guide their children with integrity and consideration (3:21). Fathers must find the proper blend of firm requirement and compassionate guidance. Consistency of requirements and discipline contributes directly to happy home life. We must not require our children to perform above their abilities. Unnecessarily severe punishment erodes a healthy respect for authority. Lack of communication leaves a child frustrated and lonely. Constant criticism crushes the spirit. A godly father encourages his children by word and example, and as necessary, corrects them in love. In Society 4. Employees who fear God will work for the good of their employer (3:22, 23). They work as honestly, honorably, and diligently as they would in their own business. The Christian chooses a job that will be of service to society and provide sufficient income for present needs. Can we willingly follow the foreman's directions, or do we hinder progress by trying to show everyone a better idea? God's standard of the Golden Rule applies to both employers and employees without respect of persons. 5. Anyone exercising authority must recognize that he is also under authority (3:24-4: 1). All masters must be gentle, easy to be entreated, full of mercy, and without partiality. The greater our earthly responsibilities, the greater our accountability before God. To be a strong leader and yet blend with our brethren requires humility. 6. Watchfulness and prayer are necessary to build the church and to witness to the world (4:2-4). The devil is seeking whom he may devour, trying to deceive even the very elect. Hence, we must pray without ceasing. All our prayers should be laced with thankfulness. We pray for our ordained leaders, who have been commissioned to preach the "mystery of Christ." We pray that the lost might see the light. We pray for endurance, that we and our brethren may be steadfast. The effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous man conditions him to be used of the Lord

6 to bring an answer to his own prayers. 7. The Christian's life and speech manifest wisdom and courtesy (4:5-6). The Christian goes the second mile in neighborhood relations. He tries to avoid offending others, is a good steward of his possessions, and complies cheerfully with government regulations. Can the world see Jesus when they look at your life? A cheerful disposition is a beacon in this gloomy world. In the Brotherhood 8. Communication and openness build wholesome interpersonal relationships (4:7-9). A clear conscience, an open life, and an approachable attitude make communication possible. Freely discussing the work of the church and seeking counsel from the brotherhood help all to feel included. Such sharing prevents suspicion and builds confidence in one another. At the same time, we must use discretion concerning with whom and about whom we share sensitive information. Sometimes spiritual mountains remain unconquered because we fear to expose our own struggles. Remember that our temptations are common to man. Trustworthy brethren of the church can help us sort through life's perplexities. 9. We need to recognize and appreciate the labors of our brethren (4:11-18). The Spirit has endowed the church with many gifts; some of them are refined while others still need to be developed. All who are making their contribution "heartily, as to the Lord" deserve our encouragement to faithfully continue their good work. The member who gives himself to fervent intercessory prayer (4:12) is no less important than the leader who is instrumental in healing rifts among brethren (4:10). Important Teachings 1. Submission by the wife and love by the husband are God's order for Christian homes (3:18-19). 2. For God to bless homelife, children must be required to obey their parents (3:20). 3. Fathers are to guide their children with integrity and consideration (3:21). 4. Employees who fear God will work for the good of their employer (3:22-23). 5. Anyone exercising authority must recognize that he is also under au-

7 thority (3:24-4:1). 6. Watchfulness and prayer are necessary to build the church and to witness to the world (4:2-4). 7. The Christian's life and speech manifest wisdom and courtesy (4:5-6). 8. Communication and openness build wholesome interpersonal relationships (4:7-9). 9. We need to recognize and appreciate the labors of our brethren (4:11-18). Answers to Questions 1. Describe the nature of submission and the role of love in a Christian home. To submit is to surrender one's independence to the leadership of another. Submission is cheerfully accepting another's judgment and making the best of the situation. The key to making submission enjoyable is reverence (Ephesians 5:33). Agape love is sacrificing and giving "even as Christ also loved the church" (Ephesians 5:25). The Christian husband holds his wife in high esteem and gives dignity to her position (1 Peter 3:7). True love lives to give. 2. How does a solid Christian home affect the development of children? It provides them with a Biblical frame of reference for responding to life's challenges. It gives them a concept of God's holiness and what He expects of us. It begins a pattern of discipline that aids in mastering self-discipline. 3. How might fathers provoke their children to anger? Fathers might provoke their children to anger by unreasonable demands, lack of communication, or abusive punishment. A father's inconsistent life frustrates his children and produces adverse effects. 4. What are "eyeservice" and "singleness of heart" (3:22)? Eyeservice is working only when under a watchful eye or working for the praise of men. Singleness means "sincerity." A person without singleness of heart needs prodding because he lacks personal motivation. 5. What are some Gospel standards for employer employee relationships? Gospel standards include following the Golden Rule, avoiding social

8 class distinctions, respecting everyone's efforts, being patient, not being quick to jump to conclusions, and open, regular communication. Employees must be willing to take direction, and employers must be willing to give credit where it is due. 6. What does it mean to "walk in wisdom toward them that are without"? Go the second mile in neighborhood relationships. Try to avoid offending others on sensitive issues. Be careful that our conduct lines up with our Gospel message. Our goal is to bring the world to Jesus. 7. How does open communication promote unity among believers? Open communication helps us to know how to pray for each other. It prevents suspicion and builds both confidence and accountability. We must communicate if we are to feel that our brethren are our spiritual family. 8. What church-building attitudes are evident in this passage? Prayerful concern for leadership is evident in 4:3. Verses 7-9 portray teamwork and appreciation for each other. Verse 10 implies a willingness to change one's opinion of another. Verse 12 shows the importance of fervent prayer for each other. Verses 13 and 14 could suggest an appreciation for gifts in others that I do not have. Verse 17 illustrates a proper use of the brotherly address, encouraging others to be faithful in their roles. Summarizing the Lesson "This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you" (John 15:12). "Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil" (1 Corinthians 13:4-5). "Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God" (1 John 4:7) Research Guide 1. The book Relationships That Bless (Rod and Staff Publishers) gives many practical helps for applying the teachings of this lesson.

9 2. Building Christian Homes (Eastern Mennonite Publications) gives practical direction for harmonious homelife.