UUSB December 2010 In this Issue: Chalica, Chalica, Chalica! Seven Days to Celebrate UU ism with your Family!!!

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1 RE at the UUSB December 2010 The religious education program of the Unitarian Universalist Society of Bangor inspires all participants to grow spiritually, develop a sense of personal and social responsibility, and experience joy in a loving Unitarian Universalist community. Special CHALICA EDITION!!! A UU Holiday!!! In this Issue: Chalica, Chalica, Chalica! Seven Days to Celebrate UU ism with your Family!!! Also, Letters from Diane, our DRE, and Reverend Becky; Taking it Home - UU Parenting during the Holiday Season What s happening in December, and The Family Choir is going A Caroling Join Us! As the holiday season approaches, we all feel pulled to do more, to be more, to give more even our kids. Diane, our DRE, suggests another approach to the impending frenzy of more that hits us through the winter and turn of the New Year. Diane s opening question is a great start for a family discussion about what is enough Are you enough? Do you have enough? Have you done enough???? Enough! I have ultimate faith that each of us is enough. This is not to say that there aren t years of things yet to be accomplished, or simply done, or otherwise acquired for some reason. Writing these questions down points out the quiet, twisted reality of the questions, because under the questions lying as still and flat as a braided rug is the implied judgment that NO, you aren t! / No, you don t! / No, you haven t!... and YES, you need to be / Yes, you need to have / and Yes, by all means, you need to do MORE! ENOUGH! Clearly the fate of the world rests on doing LESS of so many things. I invite you to do less this season. Take stock of what you have, an inventory that draws attention to what is. There is always more we want and need for so many different reasons. Sometimes this need for more is because we fail to notice what we HAVE. But, what is it you really need? How can you get it? How can you give it? Each of us is enough, just as we are right now. Learning, growing, making mistakes over and over, but enough at each turn and in each moment, perfectly flawed, beautifully imperfect each of us is a gift of what is. When the needing, doubting, fearing machine churns in your mind it is time to say: ENOUGH! Your offering, your being is enough. How can you share it? May the Warmth of this season be yours to share. Diane Forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in. -Leonard Cohen

2 COMMUNITY CONNECTIONS What brings you JOY? I love Christmas music. It is the thing about this time of year that I most appreciate. For me, it isn t Christmas if I am not hearing the carols and songs of the season. I grew up in a small town in Utah. Beginning the Friday after Thanksgiving the downtown square was filled with Christmas carols that were piped into speakers placed all over town. This was long before high tech computers and digital recordings. The town paid a person to put records on a record player and change them when the record was done. The town was filled with music from eight in the morning until six or seven at night. I loved it. I would walk the streets singing along with all of those carols and I knew all the words to all of the verses of the carols. We also did caroling just like the Family Choir is going to do this year. We gathered at the church, practiced for awhile although we all knew the carols, and then walked our neighborhood, holding candles, stopping in front of each house. Some people offered us hot chocolate, some just listened, some applauded, some sang along. It was a wonderful feeling and we especially loved it when it was lightly snowing. We did it a couple of times in December and those times are some of my most precious memories. I know that this season is about a great many holidays Hanukkah, Solstice, Kwanza, and Christmas. And, music is associated with each of these holidays. But, from my childhood it is the Christmas carols that I remember. Away in the Manager I think was my favorite. Do you have a favorite carol or Christmas song? Do you know of some songs for the other holidays? For this holiday season, I hope that your days are filled with the music of the season and the music of love and life. In UU faith, Rev. Becky ASK THE ELDERS When asked for some wise words, Christina Diebold said, Try not to buy into all the pressure, that you should write Christmas cards, bake, buy gifts, sing carols, wrap gifts, decorate - - so many things. Instead, decide what really gives you pleasure and focus on that, as much as possible. Let the perfectionism go and let the joy in! (Easier said than done, I know.) Using Christina s words as a spring board, you might ask yourself and your kids, What is really important to us during the holidays? Then, make a list of all the things you do now and again, ask yourself and your kids, If I could only do one thing, what would it be? Want to go Christmas Caroling with the FAMILY CHOIR??? The family choir will be meeting at the Childs Family s house at 1 pm on Dec. 11 th to carol for about an hour to an hour and a half. Parking is limited, so you might need to park at Fruit Street School or the Hospital (the hospital seems closer). If weather is bad, there will not be a rain date. Contact Jill Packard at or jillpackard@gmail.com for more information Volume 1, Issue 4 Jill Packard, Editor jillpackard@gmail.com,

3 CHALICA, CHALICA, CHALICA!!! Chalica A New tradition is underway! Started by Daylene Marshall, Chalica is seven days long and runs from the first Monday in December through to Sunday. Each day represents a different Unitarian Principle, a chalice is lit each day and gift(s) are given and received. Gifts can be made, bought, verbal, written, acts, shared/personal celebrations. One can have seven different chalices or one common chalice. Monday: We light our chalice for the inherent worth and dignity of every person. Daylene suggests giving gift(s) to honor those you do not understand / agree with / like. Examples: a thank-you card celebrating differences - words of forgiveness / apology - a peace offering such as inviting someone to diner - help someone in need Tuesday: We light our chalice for justice, equity and compassion in human relations. Give gift(s) to honor those in your local community that are less fortunate. Examples: spend time in a soup kitchen - donate clothes to a worthy organization - display kindness and care to those around you - take part in a political demonstration at city hall Wednesday: We light our chalice for acceptance of one another and encouragement to spiritual growth in our congregations. Give gift(s) to honor fellow Unitarians and their spiritual journey. Examples: a chalice / book / hymnal - extend words of peace or forgiveness to a fellow Unitarian with whom you may have hurt / not understood in the past - offer / take part in an event at your church / with your congregation - church potluck Thursday: We light our chalice for a free and responsible search for truth and meaning. Give gift(s) to honor another tradition, to honor education. Examples: offer / take part in an event that celebrates another religion / tradition- teach someone something you know and love - learn something new from someone else - give a book / read a book Friday: We light our chalice for the right of conscious and the use of the democratic process within our congregations and in society at large. Give gift(s) to honor democracy. Examples: help a political party - write your government - help a committee at church - host a dinner / party to celebrate democracy Saturday: We light our chalice for the goal of world peace, liberty and justice for all. Give gift(s) to honor our global community Examples: volunteer with an organization that has global influence - write a letter for amnesty international - help your social justice committee - hold a fundraiser - donate to a cause such as UNICEF, Doctors without Borders, etc. Sunday: We light our chalice for respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part. Give gift(s) to our earth and/or its creatures Examples: start a composting system - recycle bottles and cans and donate the money to an environmental / animal aid society - rescue an animal from a shelter - hold an outdoor worship service (dress warm/bonfire) For more information, you can visit and click on the RITUALS page, where you will find Daylene s article. You can also go to the facebook page at: Gallactica/ #!/UU.Chalica and See an article about it at: Page 3

4 TAKE IT HOME WITH YOU Make Unitarian Universalism an Integrated Part of Your Family s Daily Life What do we do about holidays? Christmas and Easter are quintessential Christian holidays that most Unitarian Universalist families celebrate in their own fashion, and in a way that generally fits their theology. People who share a Jewish heritage may celebrate Hanukkah, Passover, Yom Kippur, and Rosh Hashanah. Muslims have high holy days, too particularly Eid al-fitr, which commemorates the end of Ramadan. Hindus have a festival of light they call Divali, and many Buddhists celebrate Buddha s birthday or the day he is believed to have reached enlightenment. Name a religious tradition, and you ll find that there are special holidays or holy days associated with it. But not ours. Sometimes it seems as if all the holidays we UUs celebrate derive from some other religious tradition! But how do we build a value of Unitarian Universalist identity in our children if all we do is convert the holidays of other faiths into ones we can support? There may not be a single, solitary religious celebration that currently exists for all Unitarian Universalist families to celebrate. (Some UUs have started celebrating Chalica in early December, to celebrate the UUA s Seven Principles, or holding Sources Suppers, which celebrate the UUA s Six Sources.) But there are holidays some of which seem exclusively secular on the surface that merit celebration because they fit our values and our Principles. We can claim these holidays as particularly meaningful to our faith and add a religious element to them if we choose to do so. For instance, Martin Luther King Day (January 18) is a holiday that focuses upon service to others. Since social justice is a spiritual practice for so many Unitarian Universalists, intentionally commemorating this holiday as a family lifts up the value we place upon helping others. There are other opportunities to celebrate occasions, people, and events that are important to us. And while it would be rather burdensome to celebrate them all, as Unitarian Universalists we can see such celebrations as opportunities to express our individual family beliefs and guiding values. (See Meg Cox s UU World article, New Family Traditions, for a good guide to creating your own family rituals.) Darwin Day (February 12) is not exclusively for Unitarian Universalists, for instance, but its celebration of the wonder of science meshes well with our beliefs: We often turn to science and reason for inspiration as well as holy books and sacred texts. And then, of course, there s Earth Day (April 22). While Unitarian Universalists pride themselves on being green all year round, we can make a special effort on this day to celebrate the gains we have made in the areas of conservation and environmental protection while at the same time recognizing how far we have yet to go. Then there is John Murray Day, celebrated on or around September 30, a time when Unitarian Universalist families can celebrate the arrival of Universalist John Murray on the New Jersey shore. His Universalist message of a loving God who would not damn anyone to hell the idea of universal salvation caught fire in America and the rest (they say) is history. If we want to give our children a special sense of what it means to be a Unitarian Universalist, we may want to add some holidays like these into the mix. I don t think it s a stretch to call them holy days. Whether they are national days of service, ways of commemorating environmental protection efforts, celebrating science or our Unitarian Universalist heritage families can affirm their shared beliefs by the special days they choose to celebrate together. For my family, the most meaningful holy day of the year is celebrated on the evening of the Winter Solstice, December 21. We call it the Longest Night, and we observe it by not using electric lights or other electricity (besides heating) after sundown. It helps us to remember how important the sunlight was to our northern European ancestors and how the shorter days and longer nights made daily living a challenge. How do the holidays your family celebrates reflect your UU values and identity? What holiday traditions have you developed or adopted? Reprinted with permission by author, Michelle Richards available at ng/page/7/ Accessed November 30, 2010 Page 4

5 What s going on DOWNSTAIRS Would YOU like to hold THE BABY? Get Ready! For the month of December, the youth will be spending their time working on a program to share with the congregation. On December 19 th the RE Youth will be hosting an intergenerational worship service featuring the Nativity Pageant with the addition of a new character a young stable girl. As Mary invites the little girl to hold her baby, we are invited to embrace the deepest meaning Christmas holds for each of us. ~ UUA Bookstore A HUGE thanks to Linda Koehler and Rissa Moore for their help with the music practice CD s will be out next week. Diane is still looking for someone willing to Video Record the service. If you are willing, please contact her. This Sunday, our youth will be making ornaments and practicing songs during the Congregational meeting. Teens are needed to help with child care, so if you know any interested, please have them talk to Diane. There will be a rehearsal on the 12 th of December, and another BRIEF practice on the 18 th of December (Saturday) from AM. Remember, on Dec. 26 th, there will be no formal RE classes, and Diane will be off, but there will be a project where the youth will write a letter that they will keep for a year. Other information to pass on is that the Hersey Bequest information will be coming out soon. RE attendance of 50% or greater is required to qualify for bequest funds to attend Ferry Beach. Also the 2-5th class is splitting in to 2-3 and 4-5 we need additional teachers to make this work. Last but not least, the HS group needs chairs and a rug to make the stage a "home". Donations happily accepted! The mission of RE at the UUSB: To inform and enrich the lives of the children, parents, and families of the youth enrolled in the UUSB RE program; To make the RE Program more visible in the UUSB community; To make intergenerational connections within the UUSB community. Director of Religious Education Diane D Amour McClellan Phone: uubangorre@gmail.com Editor : Jill Packard Phone: (207) jillpackard@gmail.com The RE Program would not be the same without the dedication and hard work of the RE Committee. Karen Childs karenchilds75@gmail.com Maureen Smith - maureens@maine.edu Laura Santilli - Laurabngr@aol.com Susan MacKay - smackay@zmtrx.com Sueann Gaitings - sagaitings@toast.net "Children will not remember you for the material things you provided but for the feeling that you cherished them." ~ Richard L. Evans Please Send Submissions! If you have something you d like to share with the Religious Education community, or have a topic of interest that would be for the benefit of the congregation that relates to the mission of the Religious Education program here at the UUSB, please forward your ideas or written work to jillpackard@gmail.com Page 5

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