a taste of rainbow Tan Wai Jia Faith is being sure of what we hope for, and certain of what we do not see. ~ Hebrews 11:1 Written and Illustrated by

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1 a taste of rainbow Faith is being sure of what we hope for, and certain of what we do not see. ~ Hebrews 11:1 Written and Illustrated by Tan Wai Jia

2 for those who know the taste of sadness, and my loved ones, for your faith in me. Copyright Tan Wai Jia 2011 All rights reserved ISBN

3 i love ice-cream,

4 especially ice-cream with rainbow sprinkles.

5 When i was a little girl, daddy would buy me my favourite ice-cream with rainbow sprinkles whenever i was a good girl.

6 Rainbow sprinkles are the BEST THINGS in the world!

7 When i was bigger, daddy let me buy my own ice-cream with rainbow sprinkles but only when i thought i was a good girl.

8 Good girls are thin and smart and very, very beautiful. i don t think i m a good enough girl.

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10 Someone once told me i was not thin, or pretty enough.

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12 Rainbow sprinkles don t taste so good anymore.

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14 Sometimes i think i d die

15 just to be a little bit taller, and thinner,

16 and a little bit more beautiful.

17 Good girls never get mad or sad.

18 Why is it so hard to be perfect? or to be me?

19 i think i ve lost a part of me. Someone stole it in the night.

20 i ve searched high far, and wide. and low,

21 Still, I could not find my mouth. The heart is a hungry place.

22 Sometimes, you feel like giving up

23 and it feels like the storm will never end.

24 But it will.

25 Faith, never lets you down. Hold on.

26 Finding your mouth takes courage.

27 it means being brave to ask for help,

28 and being brave to say you re feeling i n s e c u r e, worth less s a d, a n s c a g r y, r e d,

29 It s okay to say you re, br o ke n weak, or fla ed. w We all are.

30 If you really look, you will find something so beautiful inside of you.

31 Beautiful child, what is beautiful is what the eye cannot see.

32 Everybody deserves a taste of rainbow

33 including me. Sadness and hurt are difficult emotions. They bring about shame, guilt and pain. But you don t have to battle them alone. Angels are here to help you find your mouth. By being brave to share your story and seek help, you too can taste your rainbow and help others find theirs too. Take courage. Have faith. There is sunshine after the rain.

34 Eating Disorders are complicated conditions that can cost you your life. They come in various forms like anorexia (starvation), binge eating (uncontrollable eating) and bulimia (starvation followed by overeating). People with eating disorders often deny being unwell. Very often, it starts off simply as an innocent desire to lose weight. Unlike what many people think, it is not about vanity. Rather, they feel bad about their bodies and themselves because they are hurting inside. Eating disorders are increasing all over the world among younger people at an alarming rate. The good news is that they are very treatable conditions, especially when treated early. The best treatment deals with addressing one s psychological, medical and nutritional needs. Full recovery is definitely possible. Nonetheless, the hardest part may be to admit that help is needed and to reach out to seek professional help. So, if you are hurting, be brave and tell somebody. And if you know someone suffering, share this message with them. It s not too late to get help. For more information, visit:

35 With special thanks to: my family, for your support and unconditional love, all my friends, especially Jo, Ther, Jeslyn, Aunty Audrey, Eck Kheng & Aunty Anita, and many others, for your patience, unceasing prayer and faith in me, the team at Singapore General Hospital, especially Ms Evelyn Boon and Anita Foo, for your tough love, Jacqueline, both Angelas, Angeline, Lena, Zahra, Janet, Dr Lee E.L and Dr Lee H.Y, for your encouragement, SingHealth and JC Trust Ltd, for your support, Cornerstone Community Church, especially Pastor Yang Tuck Yoong, Ps Daphne and Ps Wenhui, who ve taught me God s word with such power. It changes and inspires me constantly, my triathlon and cycling buddies, for teaching me how to bike, and to enjoy food and life. You ve impacted my life in ways you don t know, and God, for healing me, for walking with me through the storm, and for rainbows. Wai Jia is a 24-year old girl who likes painting, cycling and rainbows. Having been through and overcome depression and anorexia, she wrote this book with the hope of helping others overcome their fears of stigma. By sharing her story, she hopes those suffering will find courage to seek help. Depression is not a failing, but a season of life to be walked through with others. Recovery is possible. She is a final-year medical student who dreams of becoming a medical missionary. To find out more, visit