ONCE UPON A TIME there was a man who was a minister who had lost touch

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1 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 THE SETUP CHAPTER ONE- Monday morning ONCE UPON A TIME there was a man who was a minister who had lost touch with the meaning of life. This seems impossible because ministers are in charge of the meaning of life, but nonetheless, it happened to him. He had graduated from Seminary 20 years before and worked hard within the system. He had been promoted to increasingly more challenging positions. He had volunteered the little free time he had each week in working as a volunteer in his denomination and in the community. He had done everything he was supposed to do, and it wasn't working. So he worked even harder, assuming that the problem was a lack of effort and that, by sheer investment of energy, he could break through the walls which seemed to enclose him. He would prowl through the bookstores buying manuals on time management, success and motivation. He felt envious and angry toward colleagues who seemed to him to be less talented but achieved more in their work. He spoke less and less with his wife about what he was feeling because he did not like her answers. He came home tired and couldn't sleep. He would rise in the night and channel zap through 133 channels on his cable TV, looking for something that could hold his interest. One night when he came back to bed, his wife woke up and she sleepily began to pat him the shoulder and murmur into his ear: "It will be OK, honey, it will be OK." He began to cry. She woke up and comforted him, and he couldn't stop crying. After about an hour she whispered the words into his ear that would change their lives:

2 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 THIS IS TOO HARD FOR YOU TO DO ALONE. "You're right" he agreed, surrendering, and immediately feel into a deep sleep. The next morning at coffee he was embarrassed. "Admitting that I am in a position where my life is unmanageable is one thing, and admitting that I have no clue as to how to solve it is another. It's obvious that I need someone with a fresh perspective to show me the way that I can't find for myself anymore." "I agree," she said, pouring him a second cup of coffee. "That's why I've already called my brother Frank. He'll call you at the office today." Frank was the head of personnel for a rapidly growing corporation in Capitol City, about 30 miles away. "Why Frank?" he asked. "Honey, if you were unique, your problem would be unique, and it would have no solution. But it's not unique, and, as troubled personnel is his business, Frank has probably seen it before." She bent over and kissed his forehead. "And you're never going to shut me out of that part of your life again." "Amen," he said, and kissed her thoroughly.

3 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 CHAPTER TWO - Doing Something About Mondays "Carol and I have been worried about you," his brother-in-law Frank said over the phone after hearing about his frustrations. "The dark night of the soul, eh? That's rough." The troubled minister found it easy to talk with him. "Frank, what should I do about this?" "Well," his brother-in-law began slowly, "I wish I could tell you that your problem is unusual, but it is not. Now that big business is turning to the model of volunteer for employees, we are getting a lot of the same problems in business. A volunteer works hard, doesn't worry about overtime, and passionately cares about a job. But if a volunteer begins to feel used and taken advantage of, that volunteer quits or decreases the work they accept; an employee doesn't have that choice. The fuel for those extra hours is the passion and excitement; when that motivation is used up, our employees are crashing in patterns similar to what you are experiencing." "What are you doing about it?" "Right now, we're just trying to define it. We're calling it burnout although that word is inadequate. Our first thought was to educate our managers, but many of our employees burn out in response to their own volunteering in the workplace, not because anything imbalanced is asked of them by management." "You mean they do it to themselves?" "Yes, to a large degree." "Well, I certainly have volunteered for my burnout; I don't have a boss who is looking over my shoulder every minute acting like a slavedriver."

4 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 "Are you sure about that?" Frank asked. "If you've been working like a slave, how can you be certain there is no slavedriver?" The troubled minister had no answer for that question. We re seeing two interlocking concepts as people break down: doing the wrong thing and trying harder and doing the right thing without enough help. I know the last one is my problem, the minister said. They probably both are, but without enough help - and the idea of enough includes the right kind of help - any task will fail to be accomplished. Enough help is enough to not only get it done, but in a way that leaves everyone involved healthy. I know I m rushing from one thing to another and always having to cut corners. Frank changed the subject. "You know I attend First Church here. About a year ago our minister started talking about this subject and has changed a lot of his working habits as a result. I would like to invite you to a meeting this Wednesday night to meet with him and talk about it." First Church in Capital City had steadily grown over the past 20 years under Frank's minister, and significantly in the past few years. It had gone from being a church a little larger than the one he had now to the largest church in their denomination in the state. There was a lot of envy and criticism among the ministers about that, but a lot of curiosity as well. Certainly if anyone knew how to deal with being overwhelmed, it would be the minister of First Church, Capital City. "Let me get my calendar." Frank heard the shuffling of pages. "I have a meeting this Wednesday evening. Perhaps he would meet with me during the day." Frank laughed. "I don't think he would; I'm sure he'd tell you to come Wednesday

5 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 night. Tell me about your Wednesday night meeting. Are you chairing a committee?" "No, it's one of our women's circles. I like to make as many of their meetings as I can to keep in touch." "So your presence is appreciated but not truly necessary?" "When you put it that way, I guess you would say that it's not necessary." "So you will have to decide which is the best use of your time: learning about a new way to work and live, or perpetuating your old ways." "When you put it that way, I guess I will see you Wednesday." Frank gave him the details of where they would meet next Wednesday and that he would send him a copy of a test he was using to help identify burnout. "Would you like a tip that would increase the value of your experience?" "Sure." "Come a couple of hours early, grab some food and take it to a park. Use the time to stroll, relax, think about your situation. Sit on a bench and don't move for a while. Then come to the meeting." "That makes no sense at all." "Just try it. Give yourself an hour to think." "OK, OK! I promise!" the minister said, laughing, as he disconnected. Frank was pushy, but he could tell that Frank really cared about him.

6 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 CHAPTER THREE - An Hour To Think It was raining hard the following Wednesday, so that meant the park would not be that pleasant a place to spend an hour. He decided to keep his promise by going to the mall; it wasn't quiet but it would be sufficient. He would just be surrounded by human nature rather than nature. He picked up a tray of his favorite food at the food court and began to observe the river of people flowing down the walkways of the mall. The burnout test from Frank 1 lay beside him on the table. His score put him in the danger zone, with the only blessing being that his marriage and health had not yet been significantly affected - yet. He had far too many 5" answers for Usually true. He definitely had a problem and he definitely had to do something. The test was pretty straightforward and convincing. He reviewed the questions and his answers again. 1. I feel tired when I've gotten adequate sleep. 2. I am dissatisfied with my work. 3. I feel sad for no apparent reason. 4. I am forgetful. 5. I am irritable and snap at people. 6. I avoid people at work and in my private life. 7. I have trouble sleeping due to worrying about work. 8. I get sick more than I used to. 1

7 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of My attitude about work is "why bother?" 10. I often get into conflicts. 11. My job performance is not up to par. 12. I use alcohol and/or drugs to feel better. 13. Communicating with others is a strain. 14. I can't concentrate on my work as I once could. 15. I am easily bored with my work. 16. I work hard but accomplish little. 17. I feel frustrated with my work. 18. I don't like going to work. 19. Social activities are draining. 20. Sex is not worth the effort. 21. I watch TV most of the time when not working. 22. I don't have much to look forward to in my work. 23. I worry about work during my off hours. 24. Feelings about work interfere with my personal life. 25. My work seems pointless. Total: Scoring: You are doing well.

8 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of You are OK if you take preventive action You are a candidate for burnout You are burning out. You are burning out. He got a refill on his drink and watched people for a while. He suddenly noticed how few of them showed any signs of happiness or enjoyment. Their faces were either set in a look of grim determination or lost in a vacant passivity. The passive ambled as if unsure of their direction. You are burning out. The grim ones marched forward as if expecting a battle at any moment. He found it amusing until he realized that they seemed to be mirroring his dissatisfaction in life. After a while, without consciously realizing it, he began to pray for them and, eventually, also for himself. You are burning out. The hour passed very quickly.

9 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 CHAPTER FOUR - Solomon s Porch Upon arriving at the church, he found Frank sitting at a table in the church fellowship hall with several people he did not know; everyone was wearing name tags. Frank introduced them and led him over to the table with laden with cookies, fruit and vegetables. There was coffee, iced tea, juice, ice water and hot water for tea or cocoa. Frank laughed in response to his unspoken question: "The coffee is decaf; if you want caffeine you'll need to drink tea. Caffeine's one of the problems with burnout." He grabbed a regular tea bag, made tea and came back to the table. "What's going on here tonight?" he asked Frank. The room was set up with 20 or so tables; some were crowded, some were empty, at others individuals were reading through notebooks or other materials. Each table had a small basket; he could see the one on their table held a dozen clothes pins in a variety of bright colors. "We call this Solomon's Porch," Frank explained. "It's modeled on two concepts: the verse in Acts 5:12 where the Apostles gathered daily in the New Testament version of a public park called Solomon's Portico, and also on the traditional Friday beer blasts at Silicon Valley startups - minus the beer, of course." "What is the purpose?" "Organizations are living systems built out of people. The Bible identifies the church as such: we are the body of Christ. Every part of a system is linked to every other part, and every part has a need from time to time to communicate with other parts. Solomon's Porch is that communication time. Any leader in our church can drop by on Wednesday night and find out what he or she needs to know. They can stay for the full three hours or just a few minutes."

10 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 "What's going on tonight?" "That group over there is studying the book of Proverbs. The group in that corner is a class led by one of our associate pastors on how to lead a meeting." Frank pointed to a man sitting at a table alone. A little stand on the table held a card where all could see it; printed on the card was the word Missions. "That's our missions committee chair. The fact that he's claimed a table indicates that there will be some sort of committee meeting tonight." Across the room was a card printed "Youth Camping Trip" and a boisterous crowd of teenagers. One of the teens put a bright red clothespin on the card and Frank rose from the table. "That red clothespin is a request for input from the Finance Committee, and I'm representing them tonight. See you in a bit." It was disorganized, but there was a lot of energy in the room, quite a difference from the mall. People were having fun. He looked at the two left with him at the table. "What table are we?" he asked jokingly. The woman, identified as "Angel" by her name tag, said, "We are a pet project of Frank and the senior minister. Bill and I call this the burnout table but Frank and the senior pastor call it the OMM table." "Burnout table?" "We are both survivors of professional burnout. Pretty severe cases. Frank told us you would be here tonight, so we came to meet you. Our main group normally meets on the fourth Wednesday, but we are clergy." "Why do you call him Bill and his name tag says 'Oscar'?"

11 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 "It's short for Oscar the Grouch, Bill answered. From Sesame Street. My burnout manifested itself as anger and complaining. So the group labeled me as 'Oscar'. Whenever I get out of line somebody calls me Oscar and that wakes me up from being a grouch." "I compensated by pretending to be perfect and flawless so my nickname became Angel' - which we all know none of us are." What s Frank s nickname? They snickered. Frank! "What does OMM stand for?" "That's what the senior pastor calls his cure for burnout. He now prefers to call himself the One Minute Minister. He even has that as the title on his business card." "Why the One Minute Minister?" "Because it only takes a minute to change direction," Bill said. "Because it only takes a minute to ask God for guidance, " Angel said. "Because it only takes a minute to show people you care," Bill said. "Because it only takes a minute to get started on your paperwork!" Frank said, laughing, as he returned to the table. Bill crumpled up a piece of paper and threw it at him. "Because it only takes a minute to be honest about your imperfections." "Because it only takes a minute to recognize that you're acting like a grouch." "Because we clean up our messes one minute at a time," Frank said, throwing the paper back at Bill. "Because we relate to God one minute at a time," Angel said.

12 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 "Because we relate to our people one minute at a time," Bill said. "Because we tie up our loose ends one minute at a time," Frank said, clipping a green clothespin to the placard. "How long did you rehearse that? the minister asked. And who's the comedy routine for?" They just looked at him and smiled. Frank nodded toward the table of teenagers where an older man excused himself and walked toward them. Dressed casually in khaki's and a polo shirt, he radiated calmness, competence and confidence. "Hello," he greeted him. "I'm the One Minute Minister. As the One Minute Minister sat down at their table, Bill took an index card out of a shirt pocket filled with them. "Would you mind sharing with us how we can be in contact with you... name, address, phone, , etc.?" As he wrote his information down on the card he listened while they chatted with one another. An interesting thing happened when he slid the card across the table. Angel got a bound record book out of her purse and made a note of his information, while the One Minute Minister dictated his information into a digital recorder smaller than a cell phone. Frank already had the information in his day planner. "I've known of you for many years," the One Minute Minister said to him, "but I'm glad to finally meet you." Upon seeing the look in his face, the One Minute Minister explained, "Oh, we've shook hands and passed the time at denominational meetings, but that's a far cry from sitting at this table tonight. That's pseudocommunity, the imitation of the real thing; hopefully, here we strive for the real thing. No one sits at this

13 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 table, including me, if they don't at one time or another need real help. I needed it once, and I received it, and now I'm a One Minute Minister and I'm trying to return the favor." "What is the 'one minute' thing?" "Things go wrong one minute at a time. And it only takes a minute to start to turn them right again. Consider a jet airliner flying from New York to Los Angeles. It will constantly drift off course in its journey. It takes less than a minute, however, to get it back on course. Every minute between course corrections puts it farther and farther away from the quickest path to the true destination. I'm a One Minute Minister because I frequently take a minute to get back on course in my life." "I don't think I have a problem staying on course; my problem feels like I've forgotten where I'm going. I'm no longer sure what is off course and on course." "That's a common problem," said the One Minute Minister. "But it's a deceptive one. The wandering you've just described to me is the situation of a pilot who is either lost or who is confused as to which destination is best. The minute you choose a destination, you are not lost; you are only on course or off course." "I think I understand what you are saying." "Let's talk about our careers as pastors. When we woke up and realized that we had a call to the ministry, we were excited to be doing God's work and working for God. Our calling was a beacon that led us in a direction. Our goal was to please God and fulfill our calling. And then what happened?" "They told us to go to a seminary." "Exactly; what a subtle shift in the goal, but it took us off course. Now we had a new course: finish seminary. And how do we do that?"

14 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 When he looked blank, Angel supplied the answer: "Please the professors." "And this change of course led to another after graduation. We were sent to a small church, eager to prove ourselves by doing what?" "Please the people!" Bill interjected. "Exactly. And how do you please the people?" "You do it their way." "Or?" "You lose your job." "So here is the new course: please everybody. And how many people is it possible for one minister to please?" "In seminary they said that you needed more staff to serve a church of more than 100 in average worship attendance." "And how many people do you have now?" "Close to 200." "You must be good at this job of pleasing people. So how does it feel, racing from one person to another, trying to please all of them?" "Exhausting." "So the meaning of on course has been changing all these years, to where now to be on course means to please all your people. How long has it been, honestly, since your only goal was to please God?" "Years." "What would happen if you stopped trying to please everybody and set a course to please God?"

15 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 "I would lose everything I've worked for all these years." "Ah! Not necessarily so, but it feels like that, doesn't it? But at the same time, isn't there a part of you that dreams of exactly that? Doing some other work? Aren't you already fantasizing of letting go of it all anyway? Isn't it becoming too great a burden to carry?" "Yes." "So, what does this mean, when Jesus says to us: Come to Me all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke on you and learn of Me, for I am meek and lowly in heart, and you shall find rest to your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light." "It's not that easy." "Oh, but it is. You were called to pull the yoke of Christ, and you have all you need to pull that yoke, for His yoke is easy and His burden is light. Over the years you have taken upon yourself many other yokes; they are the problem. Remove them one by one - and with as little fuss as possible - and you will find that you have returned to your original calling: to please God." "It sounds too good to be true." "It's what being a One Minute Minister means to me: one minute at a time, I yield myself to God, then seek to learn and do what pleases Jesus Christ. That's my primary course correction." The One Minute Minister took his hand and looked him in the eyes. "Are you ready for something different?" He nodded. "We can help, act as guides, but are you willing to do the work necessary to change?"

16 THE ONE MINUTE MINISTER by David O. Kueker October 9, of 16 "Yes." The minister was certain that he wanted a change. "OK. Remember your calling." The One Minute Minister rose to go to another table. "He s ready. Show him the money.