Prone to Wander 2 John 21:15-23 April 21, 2013 Travis Collins Prone to wander, Lord I feel it. Prone to leave the God I love. Robert Robinson wrote those words in the 1700 s. He was aware of his own tendencies, his own inclination, toward spiritual wandering. We all are prone to wander. Do you remember the song, The Wanderer? One of the verses says, I'm the type of guy that likes to roam around I'm never in one place, I roam from town to town And when I find myself fallin' for some girl I hop right into that car of mine and ride around the world 'Cause I'm a wanderer Yeah, a wanderer Perhaps some of us struggle more than others, but every Christ-follower here is prone to wander. Like Peter. On the night before Jesus died, three times Peter denied he knew and followed Jesus. Peter had bragged about how he d never do that then folded like a lawn chair under pressure. At the moment when Peter denied Jesus the third time, Jesus turned and looked at Peter. The Bible says Peter went off to himself and wept bitterly. That was Thursday night. Yet the Bible says that after his resurrection on Sunday morning the first person Jesus went to was Peter. Visiting with Peter was on the top of Jesus postresurrection to-do list. Jesus wanted Peter to know there was going to be an Easter party, and Peter was invited. So Jesus met with Peter privately. At least once; maybe twice. Though we aren t privy to those conversations we can assume, I believe, that there they took care of Peter s forgiveness. We can imagine Peter s heartfelt confession and Jesus equally heartfelt assurance of grace and mercy. But then came an opportunity for not just restoration, but also for reinstatement. Peter and six of the other disciples had reassembled up north at the Sea of Galilee. Jesus had said he d meet them there. At dawn Jesus showed up and built a fire on the shore. When Peter and the others came in from a night of fishing Jesus said, just as casually as could be, Let s have a fish fry. So they ate some of the profits from their catch for breakfast. Then Jesus had a private word with Peter: Feed my sheep. 1
I remember the late comedian Jerry Clower preaching in chapel when I was in seminary. He told a story about his grandmother (or somebody) noticing a kid carrying a kerosene lantern carelessly. She reprimanded the boy: If you re gonna tote the light, tote the light right! Clower applied that story to the call that we seminarians had to tote the light. And the truth is that sometimes those entrusted to the light don t tote the light all that well. Sometimes we re careless with it. Sometimes we drop it. One of America s greatest inventors was Thomas Edison who invented, among many other things, the light bulb. In the first days of his research, dozens of hours were required by Edison s staff to produce a light bulb. One day, after completing one of those precious bulbs, Edison turned and handed it to a young errand boy and asked him to take it upstairs to be tested. The errand boy turned around and stumbled. He fell and the precious bulb shattered into a hundred pieces. Edison didn t reprimand the boy. Didn t lose his cool. He told the boy it was all-right, turned to his staff and said, Let s make another one. When that one was completed, days later, Edison carried the new bulb to that same errand boy, handed him the bulb, and asked the young man to take the bulb to the testing room. He gave the young man another opportunity to tote the light. Jesus spoke with Peter, who had messed up dropped the light, if you will. And Jesus said, Here, I am going to entrust the light to you again. I believe you won t drop it this time. This is how it happened. After the fish fry, Jesus said to Simon Peter, Simon son of John, do you love me more than these? What did Jesus mean? Commentators all seem to agree on two possibilities. One, perhaps Jesus gestured toward the boats and nets, and asked Peter if Peter loved Jesus more than his vocation, his living. The second theory is that Jesus gestured toward the other disciples, and asked Peter, Do you love me more than they do? We can t know exactly. We can know that Jesus asked, Do you love me? Three times Peter denied Jesus. Three times Jesus asked Peter, Do you love me? Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, Do you love me? And he said, Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you. Jesus said, Feed my sheep. Jesus gave Peter the light to tote again. Sent him back out on the playing field after he d fumbled the ball. Gave him another opportunity to dance after he d fallen. Gave him a solo even though he d forgotten the words the last time. Jesus gave Peter another chance to serve. Now let s not assume reinstatement is always this quick. I believe when a minister of the gospel fails morally and I m talking about one of those sins that brings embarrassment and scandal to the church and calls his or her integrity into question 2
then that minister should be loved and to him or her grace should be extended. But I also believe that minister should resign and take some time before moving back immediately to another place of vocational service. I believe he or she needs time for reflection, correction and redirection. The same is true, I believe, of lay leaders. In a few weeks, during our Hot Topics, we re going to talk about church discipline. Within that discussion will be a consideration of what happens when a church leader falls. In the New Testament discipline is exercised for the sins of sexual immorality, divisive behavior, and heretical (unbiblical) teaching. So when something like that happens, it s appropriate for that church leader to step down, at least temporarily. The apparent New Testament line of thinking is that nothing should be allowed to harm the reputation of the church, the health of the church or teaching of the church without consequences. Then, after reflection, correction and redirection the leader can serve again. So all restitution won t be as quick as Peter s. Peter s sin, though egregious, did not fit into the take some significant time before you come back category. Peter s sin was big news in the small circle of Jesus friends. It was awful. It was shameful. To deny Jesus when Jesus was at his most lovingly vulnerable. But it was not the kind of scandal that would have wounded the reputation of Jesus followers among outsiders. Therefore, with little delay, Jesus said, Peter, get back to work. Peter s experience opened the door for ministry to fellow strugglers. One of the most interesting points in this story is what Jesus told Peter during what we call the Last Supper. Jesus knew that Peter was going to wander and said to Peter, You are going to sin, but when you have returned to me, strengthen the brethren. That reminds me of David s prayer for forgiveness in Psalm 51, Clean me up, then I will teach transgressors your ways. Peter would return, Jesus predicted, to a position in which he could be a leader and encourager of his fellow followers of Jesus. In fact, his own fallibility would enable him to understand the weaknesses of others. To one who had fallen, Peter could say, Man, I ve been there. There was a young pastor who accepted his first church in the mountains of eastern Kentucky. One of the ladies in the church didn t like the new pastor and made no bones about it. The youthful minister went to see her to find out why he didn t have her support. She told him, You ain t old enough to have sinned enough to have repented enough to be able to preach about it! Peter could say, I have sinned and repented. I ve been there. I can preach about it. For all of us our own sins ought to make us somewhat more understanding of our fellow strugglers. That doesn t mean we should condone immorality, unethical behavior, or wrongdoings. Our imperfection does not demand that we, in the spirit of understanding, overlook sinful acts. But our judgment of others must always be somewhat tempered by our reminders of our own sinfulness. 3
One of the best examples I know of falling, then eventually feeding the sheep again, is Gordon MacDonald. Gordon MacDonald was a pastor of the largest church in New England. Then he became president of Inter Varsity, the wonderful campus-based discipleship ministry for young adults. Then something happened. I don t know the details. But he was unfaithful to his wife. He then stepped down from his role at Inter Varsity and took a lot of time off. His wife remained with him and they rebuilt their marriage. Then, years later, he wrote, Rebuilding Your Broken World. He is feeding the Lord s sheep. In the book he assumes full responsibility for his wandering and warns his readers against the victim mentality that blames our sins on our circumstances. He also speaks of grace: My perception is that broken-world people exist in large numbers, and they ask similar questions over and over again. Can my world ever be rebuilt? Do I have any value? Can I be useful again? Is there life after misbehavior? My answer is yes. That is what grace is all about. A marvelous, forgiving, healing grace says that all things can be new. Although some will always remember Gordon MacDonald as the minister who cheated on his wife, that act does not define him. Although Peter will always be remembered as the one who denied Jesus, that wandering does not define him. Years after this reinstatement on the shore Peter wrote, in what we call 1 Peter 2:24, He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; by his wounds you have been healed. Peter knew he was not defined by that night when he betrayed Jesus. He was defined by what God made possible for him in Jesus when Jesus took upon himself our sins and died. You are not defined by the scars of a difficult past, either. You are not defined by your poor choices along the way. Peter said it: We are defined by what Jesus did on a cross two thousand years ago. You are not a product of your past. You are a product of God s love and lifechanging and life-healing power unleashed on the cross when Jesus died on your behalf. If you have trusted your life to Jesus you have been redeemed and you can be reinstated. The steps to reinstatement. We don t know the whole story with Peter and his reinstatement. Did he ever say, Guys, I let the Lord down. And I let you down. And I m deeply sorry. We don t know those details. But we do know this: Reinstatement always requires repentance. The biblical word for repentance is metanoia in the Greek language, Metanoia is the combination of two Greek words: meta, which means "change" (as in metamorphosis); and noia, which means mind. Repentance is not just contrition, and not just a U-turn. It s also a new way of thinking. Thinking that goes like this: 1. I am responsible for my sinful choices; not a victim of my circumstances. 4
2. I ask for forgiveness because God is forgiving and I am forgivable. 3. I have a holy identity as a follower of Jesus and I choose to live up to that identity. 4. I still have a mission and by God s grace I will fulfill it. A legend from the Old Country tells of two men who were arrested for and convicted of stealing sheep. Their sentences included several years in prison and, and the burning of the letter S into their foreheads with a hot branding iron. The judge thus wanted to make sure that no one ever forgot their crime. When their prison terms had ended, one of the two left the area and never was heard from again. The other, however, terribly sorry for his actions and having dedicated his life to God, chose to remain in the community where he d stolen from people, and do what he could to serve the people he d wronged. He was faithful to his decision, and faithfully served the people of his community. He pitched in when they needed help with their chores, he nursed them in their sickness, and he comforted them in their crises. Eventually, no one spoke of his crime anymore. They spoke of his heart. Of his service. Of his love for them. So one day two little boys, too young to know of the crime of the man with the S on his forehead and never having heard why it was there, wondered about that strange brand. One of the boys asked the other, Why do you think he has an S on his forehead? I m not sure, answered the second boy, but from what my mum says about him, I think it must mean Saint. (from Rebuilding Your Broken World, Gordon MacDonald) You don t have to be identified by your wanderings. You can be identified by your service. If you ve wandered yet you could answer yes to Jesus if he were to ask if you love him then it s probably time for you to take your place in service again. To tote the light again. To get in the game again. To declare with humble gratitude, I still have a mission and by God s grace I will fulfill it. 5