Dear Disciple Life Leaders,

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3 Dear Disciple Life Leaders, I m very excited to introduce you to a new church-wide series that we will be starting in late January. Over the past few months, my team and I have surveyed adults in our congregation. The question we asked across all of our areas of ministry was, What is your family s biggest challenge? When we got together and compared responses from our church family, we saw many commonalities. Many are struggling with making Christ the center of their homes and families in the fast-paced, busy world in which we live. As a result, we have been working on a three-week series called Priorities. In this series, we will be focusing on making Christ the center of our lives in three main areas: our time, material possessions (or stuff ), and communication. We have written curriculum that we are asking Sunday School classes and Life Groups to use during this series on January 26, February 2, and February 9 (or during the corresponding week if your group doesn t meet on Sundays). Children s and Student ministries will also be doing a version of this material that s tailored to their age groups. On these Sundays, we will also be using this curriculum as a basis for a church-wide sermon series. Additionally, Catherine Hickem will be joining us on Wednesday nights (January 22, January 29, and February 5) for a three-week seminar series entitled Priorities: Participating with God. Each week, she will focus on one of these topics and will be presenting practical ideas that will help us implement changes to help our homes and families become more Christ-centered. I would like to invite you to join us as we embark on this journey as a church family. Please help us spread the word about this series within your sphere of influence. No matter what stage of life you re in, I think you ll find God speaking to you through this series. Sincerely, Rev. Steven Brumbeloe Associate Pastor Mt. Bethel UMC steven.brumbeloe@mtbethel.org 1

4 Priorities Series Week 1: Time Scripture Focus: Deuteronomy 6:4-9 Hear, O Israel: The Lord is our God, the Lord alone. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your might. Keep these words that I am commanding you today in your heart. Recite them to your children and talk about them when you are at home and when you are away, when you lie down and when you rise. Bind them as a sign on your hand, fix them as an emblem on your forehead, and write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. INTRODUCTION For many years, Christian parents have seen the church as the chief place in which their families have been taught the truths of the Christian faith. It is sad to say, but many parents have neglected their responsibility to lead their children into a relationship with Christ and have laid that entire responsibility on the church. The church has a part to play in nurturing and supporting the family in spiritual development, but the full responsibility doesn t rest on the church. According to a survey conducted by the Search Institute on the most significant religious influences in the lives of children, parents are first on the list. Pastors don t even come in second or third. As a matter of fact, the top five are all family members: 1. Mother 2. Father 3. Grandparent 4. Another relative 5. Siblings 6. Friends 7. Pastor As we see in this passage in Deuteronomy, before there was the church, there was the family. God established the family as the place in which our faith should be taught, nurtured, and grown. For many of today s families, time is the issue. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, in 2012, the average American (ages 25 to 54 with children) spent their time each day doing the following: 8.8 hours working 7.7 hours sleeping 2.6 hours doing leisure and sports activities 1.0 hours doing household activities 1.1 hours eating and drinking 1.2 hours caring for others 1.6 hours doing miscellaneous activities including eating and drinking, attending school, and shopping 2

5 Those 55 years old and older, spent their time doing the following: 9 hours sleeping 7 hours doing leisure and sports activities 3 hours doing household activities 3 hours doing miscellaneous activities 2 hours working and related activities QUESTIONS TO DISCUSS 1. How does it make you feel when you see these statistics and compare them to the way you spend your time every day? 2. If someone looked at your life and the way you spend your time from the outside, what would they say you value? The world sends us a lot of messages about how we should spend our time. But as followers of Christ, our lives should look different from the priorities of the world. The way we spend our time determines our priorities. In other words, the way you spend your time shows others what you value. Today, ask yourself the following questions: 1. What do I need to reprioritize in my life? 2. How can God s Word help me focus on what my priorities need to be? EXAMINING SCRIPTURE About the Scripture: In Deuteronomy, we find Moses and the people of Israel wandering in the desert of Sinai. They have spent 40 years between their journey from Egypt to Sinai, the time they spent at Sinai, and the time on the journey to Kadesh Barnea. This journey should have only taken a few days, but because Israel did not obey the Lord s commands, He turned them back into the desert, and it took 40 years! In Deuteronomy 5, Moses addresses the people of Israel and reminds them of the covenant they made with God at Horeb, known as the Ten Commandments. Moses continues as God s spokesman to the people of Israel in Deuteronomy 6. This text is known as the Shema (translated as hear! ). The Shema has served as a confession of faith in God for the nation of Israel through the centuries. There was an expectation given by the Rabbis that the people of Israel would recite the Shema every morning and evening. This commandment was a vital part of what it meant to be a part of the nation of Israel. These were not just words to be recited; the intention was for people to shape their daily conduct and order their lives around the principles found in the Shema. 3

6 Let s read this passage together. Deuteronomy 6:4-9 Hear, O Israel: The Lord is our God, the Lord alone. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your might. Keep these words that I am commanding you today in your heart. Recite them to your children and talk about them when you are at home and when you are away, when you lie down and when you rise. Bind them as a sign on your hand, fix them as an emblem on your forehead, and write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. When we get to the New Testament, this text is identified in the Gospels as the Great Commandment (Matthew 22:34-40; Mark 12:28-34; Luke 10:25-28). One of the key words in this text, the word that is repeated the most is the word your. You have One God who is Father, Son, and Holy Spirit who created you and longs to have a relationship with you. This One God didn t create you only; He created others. But the faith of your family resides first in YOU. Question to Discuss: List all of the verbs Moses uses in verses 7-9. How can you actively spend your time living out this commandment in your daily life? APPLICATION In this passage, we find three principles to hone in on as we focus on prioritizing our lives and putting God first: 1. Keep (v. 6) - Moses begins with an undeniable, non-negotiable understanding that there is one God, and He is God alone. This is the beginning of spiritual formation and the first step in our faith. He doesn t just ask the people of Israel to tell their children about God. He commands them to put God first in their lives by loving the Lord with all of their heart, all of their soul, and all of their might. So the question to ask yourself first today is: Define your relationship with God. What is it like? Knowing that YOU are the chief person responsible for your family s spiritual life, YOUR priorities must be in order before you can teach them to others. Question to Discuss: How does God want you to repriortize your life in a way that shows you love Him more? 2. Teach (v. 7) - In our fast-paced, busy world, time is one of our most precious commodities. It s easy to let our demanding daily schedules determine how we spend our time. What if we could shift our idle time to become more intentional with it? In Mark Holmen s book Faith Begins At Home, he lists some opportunities Dr. Roland Martinson identifies as ways to nurture and grow our faith and the faith of the next generation in today s world. 4

7 Car Time. Much of the time you spend with your family may be in your car on your way to the next thing you have to do. Try turning off the radio, cell phone, and DVD player and talk with your children about their highs and lows during the day. Then stop and pray for the event you re headed to next. Sick Time. Another significant block of time you have with your kids is when they re home sick from school. While no one looks forward to their children being sick, this time is invaluable when it comes to providing the opportunity to have healthy conversations. You may also spend time watching television shows, movies, or listening to music together. Find media that will naturally lead to issues of life and faith. Bed Time. This might be the most consistent, valuable time to talk about faith. Share your highs and lows from the day and then take time to pray for each other. With teenagers you can ask, What s on your schedule tomorrow that I can pray for? Do any of your friends need prayer for anything? Meal Time. Taking time out to give God thanks and praise before every meal established a habit that will remain with children into adulthood. Here are a variety of mealtime prayers to choose from: > Johnny Appleseed Oh the Lord is good to me/and so I thank the Lord/for giving me the things I need/the sun and the rain and the apple seed. /The Lord is good to me. /Amen. > God is Great God is great, God is good, and we thank Him for our food. We re gonna thank Him in the morning, noon, and night. We re gonna thank our God cause He s out of sight. We re gonna thank our God cause He s dynamite. Amen. > God Beloved (sing to the tune of Are You Sleeping? ) God beloved/god beloved/once again/once again/thank You for our blessings/thank you for our blessings/ A-A-men/A-A-men. > Doxology Be present at our table, Lord/Be here and everywhere adored./ These mercies bless and grant that we/may strengthened for Thy service be./ Amen. > Come, Lord Jesus Come, Lord Jesus, be our guest and let these gifts to us be blessed. Amen. Vacation Time. Traveling together can be a great time to reestablish faith-talks in your family. Tithe 10 percent of your vacation time to God. Do a family service project, take some quiet time to read the Bible together, or have a family devotion each day. Visit another church and discuss what you liked and disliked. On the final evening of your vacation, spend time in prayer and worship. Simply listen to a few worship songs and take time to give thanks for the time you ve spend together. Take turns sharing one thing that you were thankful for on the trip and one thing you look forward to when you get home. 5

8 Memory-Making Time. If your family is having relational conflicts, consider doing a service project together. The shared experience of helping those less fortunate than yourselves will probably give you a new perspective on the problems your family is facing. One-On-One Time. Just about every parent says the same thing about their kids: They grow up so fast. Soon, you ll be wondering where the time went. One of the best things you can do as a parent is to establish the ritual of one-on-one time with each of your children. It can be weekly or monthly, but it needs to be built into your life rhythm. Spend a weekend alone with each of your children or establish a monthly date night when you see a movie or have dinner together. The activity you choose to do is much less important than your commitment to spend time together. Question to Discuss: Discuss other ways that you talk about and teach God to your family or the next generation. How is God speaking to you in this area? 3. Wear (v. 8) The people of Israel took the Shema very seriously. So seriously that they physically wore a small box with this Scripture in it around their necks and/or on their foreheads. We would receive some strange looks if we walked around like this today, but that doesn t lessen the importance of taking these commandments to heart. The fact that the people of Israel literally wore these commandments visibly on their bodies shows that they were serious about implementing them into their lives in such a way that they were visible to others. Question to Discuss: How can you and your family be intentional about participating with God together in order to show others the love of God through your everyday lives? PARTICIPATING WITH GOD This week, the challenge is to put what you ve learned today into practice. At home, come up with an action plan for your family or home. This week, discuss your family s plan to: 1. Keep the Great Commandment 2. Teach the Great Commandment 3. Wear the Great Commandment As a family, discuss how these changes might affect the way you spend your time. Pray and ask God to help guide your family as you attempt to reprioritize this week. 6

9 Priorities Series Week 2: Stuff Scripture Focus: Luke 12:13-21 Then someone called from the crowd, Teacher, please tell my brother to divide our father s estate with me. Jesus replied, Friend, who made me a judge over you to decide such things as that? Then he said, Beware! Guard against every kind of greed. Life is not measured by how much you own. Then he told them a story: A rich man had a fertile farm that produced fine crops. He said to himself, What should I do? I don t have room for all my crops. Then he said, I know! I ll tear down my barns and build bigger ones. Then I ll have room enough to store all my wheat and other goods. And I ll sit back and say to myself, My friend, you have enough stored away for years to come. Now take it easy! Eat, drink, and be merry! But God said to him, You fool! You will die this very night. Then who will get everything you worked for? Yes, a person is a fool to store up earthly wealth but not have a rich relationship with God. INTRODUCTION We live in a culture that encourages us to buy more and more stuff. In fact, our society is so fixated on possessions that our identity as a country rests in the pursuit of happiness through money, power, and worldly success. For so many Americans, our struggle is caught up in how successful we are in the business world, our status in our community, and how much stuff we are able to provide for our families. We think that stuff - money and material possessions - will make us happy. Even if you aren t consciously choosing to pursue money and possessions in order to find happiness, your struggle may be unconscious. This struggle has made America one of the most in debt nations in the world. According to the Survey of Consumer Finances, the total debt of consumers in the U.S. adds up to more than $848 billion. In fact, our debt is also making us one of the most unhappy countries in the world because we re having to work harder than ever before to get out of this debt that we ve accumulated. The consumer-driven focus of our society leaves many American households asking the question, How much is enough? Where does our family draw the line when it comes to how big of a house to buy, how many electronics and toys to buy our kids, or how much we should spend on an extravagant vacation? Question to Discuss: How do we define the term enough? If we profess to be a follower of Jesus, this is a constant struggle. There is an unending battle between the way the world tells us to live and the way God calls us to live. God s Word is pretty clear about where seeking earthly riches will lead us. 7

10 1 Timothy 6:6-10 says, A devout life does bring wealth, but it s the rich simplicity of being yourself before God. Since we entered the world penniless and will leave it penniless, if we have bread on the table and shoes on our feet, that s enough. But if it s only money these leaders are after, they ll self-destruct in no time. Lust for money brings trouble and nothing but trouble. Going down that path, some lose their footing in the faith completely and live to regret it bitterly ever after. (The Message) Question to Discuss: Scripture tells us that if we have bread on the table and shoes on our feet, that s enough. What does that mean for Christians today? How do we determine how much stuff is enough? EXAMINING SCRIPTURE Today, we re going to look at a Scripture where Jesus talks about how we should respond to the pressure to obtain more money and material possessions. In Luke 12, we find Jesus talking with a crowd. Luke tells us that there is a crowd of thousands following Him around when someone in the crowd says, Teacher, please tell my brother to divide our father s estate with me. [Note to Teacher: In ancient Israel, the family was patrilineal, meaning the inheritances were passed through the male line. The patriarch of the family had authority over the entire household. Upon the patriarch s death, the firstborn son became the new head of the family and inherited the patriarch s estate. In Luke 12:13, we see that the man who comes to Jesus is struggling with his older brother receiving the family inheritance.] Does this sound familiar? This is a very real issue in our world today. It s a struggle over stuff. But as we re going to see, Jesus tells us that this struggle is with a matter of the heart. Let s read this passage together. Luke 12:13-21 (NLT) Then someone called from the crowd, Teacher, please tell my brother to divide our father s estate with me. Jesus replied, Friend, who made me a judge over you to decide such things as that? Then he said, Beware! Guard against every kind of greed. Life is not measured by how much you own. Then he told them a story: A rich man had a fertile farm that produced fine crops. He said to himself, What should I do? I don t have room for all my crops. Then he said, I know! I ll tear down my barns and build bigger ones. Then I ll have room enough to store all my wheat and other goods. And I ll sit back and say to myself, My friend, you have enough stored away for years to come. Now take it easy! Eat, drink, and be merry! But God said to him, You fool! You will die this very night. Then who will get everything you worked for? Yes, a person is a fool to store up earthly wealth but not have a rich relationship with God. 8

11 Before we talk about the parable Jesus tells, let s talk about Jesus immediate response to this man s concern. The man is asking Jesus to help resolve a family conflict, and Jesus tells him it s not His place to make a decision like this. However, He does offer him a warning in verse 15: Then he said, Beware! Guard against every kind of greed. Life is not measured by how much you own. Jesus always has a way of cutting straight to the heart of the matter! Jesus response reveals a heart issue that s much greater than the man s question suggests. Jesus follows up His warning with a parable, or story, about a rich farmer. What do we learn about the farmer? 1. He s rich. 2. He owns a farm that successfully produces many crops. 3. He doesn t have enough room to store his crops in his existing barns. 4. He tears down his barns and builds bigger ones to store his crops. 5. He plans to eat, drink, and be merry because he has stored enough away for years to come. At first glance, the farmer sounds smart and successful, much like many of the people we re surrounded by. He has a problem, and he comes up with a logical way to solve it. However, verse 19 gives us a sneak peak into the motives of his heart when it says, And I ll sit back and say to myself, My friend, you have enough stored away for years to come. Now take it easy! Eat, drink, and be merry! In this parable, Jesus is talking about faithfulness concerning possessions and money. It appears that the rich farmer in the passage never asked the question, How much stuff is enough? This man is a great example of one whose inner condition of the heart needed to change. The parable of this rich farmer is full of personal pronouns loaded with I, me, my and mine. The farmer could not see beyond himself because his heart was so inwardly focused. [Note to Teacher: This passage is a parable or a story that s told in a way that puts the reader inside of the story. When Jesus tells a parable, His intention is that we examine the story and identify with someone in it. He wants us to examine our lives in light of the truth of the parable.] QUESTIONS TO DISCUSS: 1. In what ways do you identify with the man in the crowd who comes to Jesus? 2. How can you relate to the farmer in this story? God s Word doesn t say anything is wrong with being wealthy, but it does warn us that greed is a sin, and it can quickly overtake us and steer us away from putting God first in our lives. Let s look at some Scriptures that talk about greed. 9

12 1. Proverbs actually warns us that greed robs us of life. Proverbs 1: But these people set an ambush for themselves; they are trying to get themselves killed. Such is the fate of all who are greedy for money; it robs them of life. 2. In Isaiah, we see that God actually removed His hand from the people because of their greed. Isaiah 57:17 - I was angry, so I punished these greedy people. I withdrew from them, but they kept going on their own stubborn way. 3. In Ephesians, Paul warns the church at Ephesus that greed has no place among the people of God. Ephesians 5:3 - Let there be no sexual immorality, impurity, or greed among you. Such sins have no place among God s people. 4. Finally, Paul tells us in Colossians that greed leads to idolatry. Colossians 3:5 - So put to death the sinful, earthly things lurking within you. Have nothing to do with sexual immorality, impurity, lust, and evil desires. Don t be greedy, for a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world. APPLICATION Going back to the parable in Luke 12, the story ends in verse 21 with: Yes, a person is a fool to store up earthly wealth but not have a rich relationship with God. The rich farmer felt that the meaning of his life came from his material possessions. However, through this parable, we see that Jesus definition of the meaning of life is having a rich relationship with Him. QUESTIONS TO DISCUSS: 1. Read John 10:10. Whose definition of the meaning of life are you living by - the thief s or Jesus? 2. How do you need to make changes in your life this week to be sure that your focus is on putting God first and not letting a struggle with greed rob you of truly living life abundantly? 3. What are some specific ways that we can pray for you and your struggle with greed this week? PARTICIPATING WITH GOD This week, sit down with your family and discuss your answer to the question, How much stuff is enough? Allow each family member to participate in answering this question. Come up with a family plan that will help guide your family when you re trying to decide if you need to purchase something. Talk about ways that your family may need to make sacrifices so that you can give to others who are in need and not let material possessions control your family life. Pray together and ask God to reveal and help you identify areas of greed in your lives this week. 10

13 Priorities Series Week 3: Communication Scripture Focus: John 21:15-17 When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, Simon son of John, do you love me more than these? He said to him, Yes, Lord; you know that I love you. Jesus said to him, Feed my lambs. A second time he said to him, Simon son of John, do you love me? He said to him, Yes, Lord; you know that I love you. Jesus said to him, Tend my sheep. He said to him the third time, Simon son of John, do you love me? Peter felt hurt because he said to him the third time, Do you love me? And he said to him, Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you. Jesus said to him, Feed my sheep. INTRODUCTION Connection is why we re here. We are hardwired to connect with others; it s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives, and without it there is suffering. Brene Brown Do you agree with the statement above by Brene Brown? The truth is that God designed us with a need for connection both with God and with each other. And if you were to take this statement one step deeper, you would find out that at the deepest root of connection is intimacy. People long to connect in an intimate way not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually as well. God really wants to be known by us, and though it may be hard to imagine, we truly want to be known by others. True intimacy requires us to be vulnerable with God and with our families and loved ones. This is hard for us because vulnerability makes us feel like we are weak. The opposite is true. Vulnerability is a sign of strength, and it is a must if we want to build strong families and build clear lines of communication with God and family. QUESTIONS TO DISCUSS: 1. When you were growing up, how did your family communicate? 2. How has your childhood experience of vulnerability affected your ability to be vulnerable as an adult? EXAMINING SCRIPTURE Jesus spent three years of His life in ministry with a group of men known as the disciples. He got to know them, travelled with them, performed miracles in front of them, prayed over them, broke bread with them, and did life with them. It s safe to say that Jesus and these twelve men reached a deep level of intimacy during the time they spent together. Aside from the fact that Jesus knew everything about them because He was God, Jesus truly loved them for who they were, and they loved Him in return for who He was. He taught them what it looks like to love Him and each other more in their time together. Their pasts didn t matter; their futures were of no concern. For the most part, they lived in the present and were able to enjoy the benefits of having an intimate connection with God through Jesus Christ and with each other. What a picture of true intimacy. 11

14 In John 21, we find Jesus appearing to His disciples after the resurrection. Peter is the third of the disciples who Jesus appears to. The reason He seems to appear to him is to let him know that He still loves him and has not cast him out after he denied Him before His death. [Note: For more background on this, see John 18 where Peter denies Jesus.] Let s read this passage of Scripture together. John 21:15-17 When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, Simon son of John, do you love me more than these? He said to him, Yes, Lord; you know that I love you. Jesus said to him, Feed my lambs. A second time he said to him, Simon son of John, do you love me? He said to him, Yes, Lord; you know that I love you. Jesus said to him, Tend my sheep. He said to him the third time, Simon son of John, do you love me? Peter felt hurt because he said to him the third time, Do you love me? And he said to him, Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you. Jesus said to him, Feed my sheep. COMMUNICATING WITH GRACE We don t know if Peter sought forgiveness prior to this encounter, but what we do know is that Jesus came to Peter and offered forgiveness, even after Peter had denied him three times. That s grace. When our family members do something that hurts us, and we don t know how to respond, maybe we should look at this model of Jesus and extend grace first. Grace extended and forgiveness offered may be the key to building a strong family. Question to Discuss: When have you found it difficult to communicate with grace to your family? COMMUNICATING WITH WORDS This exchange between Jesus and Peter reveals the importance of words. Jesus wanted to hear the words from Peter, and he also wanted Peter to use the words openly. I love you are three words that are hard for some people to say. One may say, I show my love so I don t have to say it. Words are powerful and need to be spoken. The words we speak to our families make a great impact on them. I love you can never be said enough. Question to Discuss: How do I need to do a better job of communicating my love to my family? COMMUNICATING WITH MORE THAN WORDS An important way in which we communicate with our families is through non-verbal communication. Sometimes our body language and gestures speak louder than our words. Sometimes the actions we perform scream how we feel even though our words say something different. Three times Jesus ask Peter IF he loved Him. The three times are significant in the fact that Jesus wanted to make sure Peter took the right action in taking care of God s people. Question to Discuss: Do your actions show that you (1) love God? and (2) love others, especially your family? 12

15 Sometimes the most difficult flock to care for is our family. No matter what stage of life we re in - single, a parent with young children at home, or an empty nester we all have family. Our families know the intimate details good and bad about our lives. They see us at our best and at our worst. They get the brunt of our frustration when we re struggling or having a bad day. But before God gave us anyone else, He gave us our families. Question to Discuss: When is it easiest to show grace and love to my family? When is it hardest? APPLICATION Look at John 10:11-18: I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep. The hired hand, who is not the shepherd and does not own the sheep, sees the wolf coming and leaves the sheep and runs away and the wolf snatches them and scatters them. The hired hand runs away because a hired hand does not care for the sheep. I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me, just as the Father knows me and I know the Father. And I lay down my life for the sheep. I have other sheep that do not belong to this fold. I must bring them also, and they will listen to my voice. So there will be one flock, one shepherd. For this reason the Father loves me, because I lay down my life in order to take it up again. No one takes it from me, but I lay it down of my own accord. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it up again. I have received this command from my Father. QUESTIONS TO DISCUSS: 1. If Jesus was willing to lay down His life for His sheep, then how is He calling me to lay down my life in the way that I love my family? 2. How do I need to reprioritize my life in a way that communicates to my family that I love them in the same sacrificial way that Jesus loves me? PARTICIPATING WITH GOD Spend some time with your family being honest about where you re at. Do you have trouble communicating with love and grace to one another? How are you going to make an effort to communicate with Christ-like love to each other? Spend some time in prayer asking God to reveal how your family needs to put this into action. 13

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