The Danger of Unforgiveness Matthew 18:21-35 January 12, Pastor Troy Dobbs Grace Church of Eden Prairie

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1 The Danger of Unforgiveness Matthew 18:21-35 January 12, 2014 Pastor Troy Dobbs Grace Church of Eden Prairie Lewis Smedes is as close to being an expert on forgiveness that I know and he said this regarding forgiveness: When you forgive someone, you are dancing to the rhythm of the divine heartbeat God invented forgiveness as the only way to keep His relationship with the human race alive. God invented forgiveness! And although God gets credit for inventing FORGIVENESS humans have an invention of their own called REVENGE. 1

2 Revenge says: You hurt me and I ll hurt you right back! You hit me and I ll hit you! In our culture, there s kind of a relational Newtonian law of gravity that says: for every infliction of pain there must be an equal and opposite act of vengeance. We are a payback society for sure! Interestingly, in the book of book of Genesis there s a man named Lamech (who I ll talk more about in a minute) that takes this concept to its ultimate extreme. Lamech kills a man for wounding him & says he will seek revenge seventy-seven times over against anyone who hurts him in the future. (Genesis 4:24) This is the Law of Lamech: 2

3 Hurt me and I will make you pay. Additionally, one of the most sobering statements in Scripture comes shortly after the Lamech episode - as God assesses the violence and sin / corruption that has spread like an epidemic through the people He loves: The Bible says: The Lord was grieved that he had made man on earth, and his heart was filled with pain. i (Genesis 6:6) It is as if: God keeps giving his heart to the human race, and they keep showing up at the prom on somebody else s arm. So God, who created the heavens and the earth in six days, spares Noah and his family but destroys the earth via a flood and begins again. 3

4 And He invents a kind of spiritual surgery that can make dead relationships live again. This new creation is called forgiveness. Truth be told - it is the only force strong enough to heal relationships damaged by hatred and betrayal. Now in our text for the day Peter comes to Jesus and asks the question: How many times do I have to forgive a person who sins against me? Remember in vv Jesus has just outlined the steps to take when someone sins against you. So Peter brazenly says: 4

5 How many times am I going to have to do this forgiveness thing? He says it (too) like everyone else BUT HIM will need forgiveness in the future. So let s read the text and get to work. Matthew 18: Then Peter came up and said to him, Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times? 22 Jesus said to him, I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times. 23 Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. 24 When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. 5

6 25 And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. 26 So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything. 27 And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. 28 But when that same servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii, and seizing him, he began to choke him, saying, Pay what you owe. 29 So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, Have patience with me, and I will pay you. 30 He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay the debt. 6

7 31 When his fellow servants saw what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they went and reported to their master all that had taken place. 32 Then his master summoned him and said to him, You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. 33 And should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I had mercy on you? 34 And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt. 35 So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart. ii Now let me make 3 remarks about the first section of this passage before I explain the parable. 7

8 FIRST The Rabbi s in Christ s day taught that God forgives 3 times and punishes on the 4 th. SECOND Thus, Peter s do I forgive 7 times, question is quite the generous response as it doubled the standard 3 exemptions and added 1 more. THIRD - Jesus response of seventy-seven times would have blown Peter out of the water. Jesus eclipsed Peter s graciousness with a mind-blowing standard. Now if you ll think back for a moment, the phrase seventy times seven was first made famous by Lamech, the father of Noah; he bragged if Cain s revenge is seven-fold, then Lamech is seventy-fold (Gen 4:24) His statement was as arrogant as it was outrageous. 8

9 Lamech was suggesting his revenge would be unending & without limit. And that is exactly what Jesus says in Matthew 18 but he doesn t say it about revenge; he says it about forgiveness. Jesus point is not to ratchet-up the number of times a person should practice forgiveness from three to seven to 490 times. His point is that the disciples should not be Lamech-like in their lust for revenge but rather Jesus-like in their extension of forgiveness. So if you are counting or keeping track (of the number of times you ve forgiven a person) you are off track completely. Now in this parable we see 4 scenes unfold. 9

10 OUTLINES In Scene 1 An unbelievable debt is canceled. In Scene 2- An undeserved pardon is extended. In Scene 3 An unthinkable response is exposed. Scene 4 An unrelenting punishment is given. Scene 1 An unbelievable debt is canceled. Verse 23 begins by telling us that the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. 10

11 This person was probably some kind of big wig since he was entrusted with so much money, and the king was calling in his debts. And this was one particular servant owed an outrageously large debt. The text tells us that he owed ten thousand talents. Now a typical worker earned one denarius a day and a talent was worth about 6,000 denarii. So this guy was about 60 million and some change in debt. According to 1 st Century metrics, this man would need to work about 193,000 years to earn this amount of money. 11

12 However, the point is not the mind-boggling number of years but the overwhelmingly impossible amount. Jesus uses hyperbole here. In our culture we say, I m not going to forgive him in a million years! OR he s done that to me thousands of times. The point is not the accuracy of the number, but the emotions of the accounting. Obviously, the man could not pay the debt (now or ever). Therefore, the king ordered that he and his family be sold into slavery. So everything the man had, including his family, was on the line here. 12

13 His insurmountable debt, had now cost him everything including his family and freedom! In Scene 2 - An Undeserved Pardon is extended. So the man realizes he s done! So according to verse 26, he fell on his knees and begged for the king to be patient with him, telling him that he would pay him everything he owed. Now the king and the servant both knew that was a ridiculous promise. But it is his only chance. Surprisingly & amazingly, the king is moved by the man s pleading. 13

14 And even more remarkable is the fact that the king rejects the man s offer of repayment! Actually He does two things: 1. He releases him of the consequences 2. He pardons him from any future payment. The king forgives the debt completely with no consequences whatsoever! Now just stop here and think about what this means. In one moment this man went from: being completely ruined to completely redeemed being absolutely hopeless to entirely debt-free 14

15 having an insurmountable debt (that ruined his life) to an undeserved pardon (that changed his life). Equally important, think of what this means for the king. Releasing the man and his family from jail to allow him to work for the rest of his life to pay a debt (he could never pay) would have been gracious and then some. After all everyone who heard this story knew it would be impossible for this man to actually pay the debt. But the king goes even further! The king releases the slave and cancels his future debt. 15

16 Now (don t miss) that when a debt is forgiven, someone still has to pay! Someone still has to suffer and absorb the loss. The debt doesn t magically disappear someone has to take care of it! So the king (by forgiving) this man pays the debt himself. His generosity is GREATER than the man s debt. Now this moment is meant to take your breath away. It is a foreshadowing of the gospel! 16

17 All human beings have an insurmountable sindebt that (God is just in collecting) through punishment, and yet the beauty of the gospel says God covers our: past sin pays the sin debt himself through the death of his own Son and then pardons us from all future consequences AMAZING! In Scene 3 - We see an unthinkable response is exposed Post forgiveness - the text tells us that this same servant went out and found a fellow servant who owed him some money. The man apparently owed him a hundred denarii - which was about four months of 17

18 wages, and he demanded that the debt be paid in full! Mind you - He demands this even though he has just been forgiven 579 times that amount. And in an ironic twist the indebted man pleads with the servant using the identical words that we just heard: have patience with me, and I will pay you. Now this man could have repaid his debt. It was actually possible and within reason. But the king s servant was not moved. He refused. 18

19 Then he did the unthinkable: he choked him and had him tossed in prison. Despite having himself received an incredible pardon - he treats this man with contempt and cruelty. Now the injustice of this moment is crystal clear to everyone! The fellow servants who saw the actions of the previously forgiven man were greatly distressed (v 31). The word means that they were very grieved. I mean - his actions were the epitome of ingratitude and injustice. The tragic irony is stunningly obvious! 19

20 A king was generous when he didn t have to be! A servant was forgiven when he didn t deserve to be! And (yet) the same servant refuses to forgive, in spite of all that he has just experienced. FLABBERGASTING! In Scene 4 - An unrelenting punishment is administered Well the king heard of this great injustice and brought the formerly forgiven servant back into his court and rebuked him: You wicked servant! I forgave all your debt because you pleaded with me and yet you would not have mercy on your fellow servant, like I had on you? 20

21 (Matt 18:32-33) Then the parable ends with a horrifying climax. And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers, until he should pay all his debt (Matt 18:34) iii In other words he would be in prison forever. He would never be able to repay his debt. Now Jesus wants to be absolutely sure that no one misses his point. So He makes one last statement that should make every grace-comprehending person shudder: 21

22 So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart. (Matt 18:35) iv So what is God saying to us? OUTLINES We see from this text that we need to be: 1. Extravagant in extending forgiveness to others. (vv21-27) It is dangerous to think we can receive forgiveness from God without having to extend it to others. Note Jesus doesn t say this is a bad idea He calls it impossible. God will not let it happen there will be repercussions. 22

23 So make sure you understand that - Jesus can require extravagant forgiveness from us because God has given extravagant forgiveness to us! You see I am convinced the less we appreciate the King s forgiveness the less we will forgive! The less we understand our debt before the less we ll be motivated to forgive. So think of it like this. The servant in the story got a zillion dollar gift of forgiveness from the king and yet it didn t produce a zillion dollar patience in the one forgiven. Listen until you understand our debt before God is unendingly greater than any other person s debt is before us then you will not forgive like you should. 23

24 And sadly, this man not only lacks an appreciation of the King s forgiveness in the past; but he also lacks a fear of the King s judgment in the future! Which leads to #2. From this passage we learn we need to be: 2. Ensured that God will judge our lack of forgiveness toward others. (vv28-35) Said negatively: If you fail to forgive others, you are not really forgiven. Said positively: Those who really understand the beauty, scope, depth, and power of God s forgiveness through Christ will be forgiving people. 24

25 Now in Matthew s gospel (free pardon) does not mean canceled judgment. It is a theological misunderstanding when the eternal security of believers (which is impressively taught in the Bible) is used to teach believers that there is no responsibility at judgment! I think Jesus is saying here that bogus Christianity is marked by a cavalier disregard of judgment which then leads to a cavalier treatment of people. So if you don t know you are going to be held accountable by God it is very likely you won t treat people in the way God expects. Because Jesus said very clearly in Matthew 6:15 25

26 but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses. v Now I love how verse 35 ends 35 So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart. vi Often times people will say: I will forgive but I won t forget I will love him but I won t like him Well Jesus forgive from the bottom of your heart calls out that kind of misguided thinking! We are to be all in with our forgiveness! 26

27 Thus, you are going to have to decide today am I going to be a person of: Vengeance or mercy Bondage or freedom Stinginess or extravagance Hatred or grace An unforgiving person or a forgiving person So choose wisely like your life depends on it. Because in reality it does! 27

28 i Genesis 6:6 ii Matthew 18:21-35 iii Matthew 18:34 iv Matthew 18:35 v Matthew 6:15 vi Matthew 18:35 28

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