Your. Life. Speaks. Fine Tuning Your Communication with your church, your group and your team

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Shavonne Phelps
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1 Fine Tuning Communication with your church, your group and your team

2 Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains. Pray that I may proclaim it clearly, as I should. Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grave, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone. Colossians 4:2-6 (NIV) Welcome to. A multi-speaker, practical training opportunity developed just for you the MOPS leader. We will focus on fine tuning your communication with your pastor, your team and your group. These outlines go with the web event available at Watch our speakers all at once or watch them a few at a time. Watch them alone and discuss them at your next Leadership team meeting or watch them with your team and discuss them right there. However you watch, we know you ll want to watch them all., Leader. So what is it saying? 2

3 Order of Videos (Number in parentheses is the location on the video.) Intro: Andrea Jones (02:18) Effectively Communicating with your Pastor (14:12) Understanding Pastor s Involvement Style: Bethany Ramse (14:13) Communicating with your MOPS Church: Jennifer Martin (20:17) Effectively Communicating with your Team (25:30) Communicating Through Conflict: Bonnie Smith (26:26) It s Not All About You: Lori Emery (31:15) Communicating Reasonable Expectations: Esther Feng (36:38) Leading Leaders: Michelle Oaks (42:07) Effectively Communicating with your Group (46:55) Use Words Practical Communication Tips : Melodi Leih (48:03) Memorable Presentations: Kelli Jordan (59:04) Keeping Communication Welcome: Alexandra Kuykendall (1:06:54) Moms of Children with Special Needs: Gillian Merchenko (1:11:08) Answering the So What? : Sherry Surratt (1:18:00) 3

4 Andrea Jones Director of Leadership Development and Events How do you communicate? Colossians 4:2-6 (NIV) - Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains. Pray that I may proclaim it clearly, as I should. Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grave, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone. Be devoted in prayer that is watchful and thankful. Prayer prepares our hearts Prayer paves the path with people Prayer pries open closed doors and opens opportunities and keeps us outreach focused Prayer purposes our words Be wise in the way we act and make the most of every opportunity. Full of grace. Seasoned with salt. Two Questions to Consider: Is there someone in your life, ministry or family that challenges your ability to respond full of grace? Are there individuals in your life who you need to have a grace-filled, salty conversation with?

5 Understanding Pastor s Involvement Style Bethany Ramse Regional Outreach Representative 1. The difference between an extrovert and an introvert Extrovert Introvert 2. How to tell if your pastor is an extrovert or an introvert Extrovert Introvert 3. Tip for communicating with an extroverted pastor 4. Tips for communicating with an introverted pastor

6 Communicating with your MOPS church Jennifer Martin, Regional Developer 1. Make an appointment to meet face to face with the Pastor and/or Ministry Staff 2. Be prepared for the meeting make notes of what you want to say, allow time for questions. 3. Share from your heart let them know what MOPS means to you and the Moms in your group 4. Keep the conversation going set up a time to meet again

7 Communicating through Conflict Bonnie Smith, Field Manager If people are thinking and engaged, there will be different opinions and perspectives. Lack of conflict could mean something else is wrong. We can avoid conflict, we can face it and handle it poorly or we can face it and handle it well. The Bible s perspective: Matthew 18:18 go to the person directly. Take a breath. Discern the conflict, what is my part and what are my motives. Address the issue. 1. Set the scene. Start with prayer. Acknowledge your part. Use active listening skills. Come to the table committed to the friendship, the ministry and the situation. 2. Gather information Get the other s viewpoint. Aim for cooperation. Understand the other s motivations and goals. Understand the effect. Identify issues clearly Use I statements Clarify feelings. 3. Agree on the problem. 4. Brainstorm possible solutions. Be open to all ideas. 5. Negotiate a solution. Conflict Resolution increases understanding, increases group cohesion, and increases selfknowledge. Successful leaders manage conflict.

8 It s Not All About You Lori Emery, Regional Outreach Team Lead Ask lots of questions. Smile. Don't try to win the argument. People need to be heard. Begin with the statement, "I might be wrong here but let's just examine the facts."

9 Communicating Reasonable Expectations Esther Feng, Fund Development Strategist Clearly communicate expectations. This begins when recruiting. Be up front and be positive. Continuously communicate expectations. Incorporate into meetings and s. Compassionately communicate when an expectation is breached. Look for win-win solution. Seek counsel when necessary. Don t ignore the situation. What s at stake? Moms and families who need Jesus.

10 Leading Leaders Michelle Okes, MOPS Mentor Look at leading leaders from a different perspective, following Jesus example. The good news is you don t have to have all the answers. In fact, you don t have to have ANY of the answers. Listen. Just listen. Ask powerful questions. What do you think needs to happen? Can you do that? Is there anything I can do to help you make that happen? Encourage them. Support them. Knit them together as a team. Pray with them. They will remember they were well loved and encouraged and they grew in their faith as they served alongside you.

11 Use your Words Practical Communication Tips Melodi Leih, Regional Developer W Words have a lasting affect on people O Opportunity for encouragement R Respond don t react D Direct Conversation S Spend time connecting, speak truth, serve Resources: Surprised by Worship, Travis Cottrell

12 Memorable Presentations Kelli Jordan Leadership Development Manager Be picky. Be prepared. Plan Practice Be engaging. Be yourself. Be confident. Learn something.

13 Keeping your Communication Welcoming Alexandra Kuykendall We are trying to convey a specific message to a specific audience. What is our message at MOPS? To think about: Avoid assumptions. Avoid church and MOPS language. Make your actions match your words.

14 Communicating with Moms of Children with Special Needs Gillian Merchenko Questions moms ask: Am I welcome here? Is there a place for me and my child in this group? Will my child be safe at MOPS? Are MOPPETS workers willing and excited to have my child? Will I fit in? Will moms want to talk to me? Will I be judged because of my child? Will I be worshipped because of my child? Who is the child with special needs? It is any child facing any challenge some are hidden, some are visible. To welcome the mom: Welcome them! Look the mom in the eye. Look the child in the eye, if he is willing. Provide an extra set of hands at the door. Use People First language. Put the person before the disability. Talk with the MOPPETS workers before hand. Ask the mom to share her story.

15 Answering the So What? Sherry Surratt, CEO What is it you wanted the listeners to do with the story you shared? The So What factor. What does it mean to the listener? How can it impact them? To think about as you speak: Think through the benefits of what I m sharing. Is there some learning I can share that they can apply? Is there something that will encourage them? How can they grow from what I m saying?

16 Share your comments and ideas at Follow MOPS Leaders on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram Thank you to Michelle Pietanza, Dawn Beavers and Deann Sickels for their help with these outlines and workbook. And thank you, leader, for all you do to support MOPS and the moms in your community. From your Leadership Development Team: Kelli Jordan, Jennifer Iverson and Andrea Jones 16

Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. 3

Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful. 3 And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ, for which I am in chains. 4 Pray