THE CREATION AND MANIFESTATION OF REALITY THROUGH THE RE-ENACTMENT OF SUBCONSCIOUS CONCLUSIONS AND DECISIONS MICHIEL CHRISTIAAN OPPERMAN

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1 THE CREATION AND MANIFESTATION OF REALITY THROUGH THE RE-ENACTMENT OF SUBCONSCIOUS CONCLUSIONS AND DECISIONS by MICHIEL CHRISTIAAN OPPERMAN Submitted in accordance with the requirements for the degree of DOCTOR OF EDUCATION in the subject PSYCHOLOGY OF EDUCATION at the UNIVERSITY OF SOUTH AFRICA PROMOTOR: PROF. H. E. ROETS March 2005

2 ii DECLARATION Student Number: I declare that THE CREATION AND MANIFESTATION OF REALITY THROUGH THE RE- ENACTMENT OF SUBCONSCIOUS CONCLUSIONS AND DECISIONS is my own work and that all the sources that I have used or quoted have been indicated and acknowledged by means of complete references. M. C. OPPERMAN March 2005

3 iii ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS My life has been enriched by beings and people who bless me with their love and assistance. I wish to express my deepest gratitude to the following people and beings who touched my life in a significant way, influencing the subconscious decisions and conclusions I made, and helping me in replacing these with becoming more aware and alive, more feeling and more whole: Due to my experiences with the divine, I came to the erroneous belief that God is a cruel vindictive old man, being cast in the role of the great Punisher of the sinful me. Through my work I came deeply under the impression that we create our God, as He has created us. My real God is kind, loving, supportive, healing, forgiving in direct relation with how kind and gentle I could become and be with myself. To my patients, who allowed me to use their case studies for this research project. To all my patients, who have blessed my life, who I could help and who helped me become a healer and psychologist. In direct outflow, I serendipitously discovered my promoter, Professor H. E. Roets, who was sent on my road in my quest to discover kindness in academic support, backed up with firm direction. Without you this would not have been possible; you are an angel. My previous forays into academia were met with very challenging and difficult experiences which, I now realise, were part of the reality I needed to create at that time in my life. You are a mirror of how much my life has been transformed. Honour and respect are what you have meant to me, both on an academic and personal level. My life partner, Henk Mostert, for his love, support and understanding. As I already intimated, you are part of my new reality of being kind to myself. Without you, my life will be considerably less meaningful and loving. I revere the fact that you came into my life. I have learnt from your kindness and gentleness. My parents, Evert and Trix Opperman, for endless hours of reading stories with me as a child and exposing me to books and literature, laying the foundation for a love of books and a love of learning. And for all the other lessons we contracted on, as my primary caregivers, you had the

4 iv most powerful impact on my being, on my selfhood. The farm I grew up on, my brothers and school friends, my dogs and horses. I just love being alive. Thank you. To my brothers, Evert and Ryno, and Nickey for their love, support, encouragement and friendship. To the people that I learnt the most from, my healers and teachers, Dianne Zimberoff (and her partner David Hartman) and Hedi Schleiffer (and her husband Yumi). Without you, I would not have had the personal growth I experienced, or developed the theory that I did. I stand on the shoulders of giants and hope I do you justice. The creator of Imago, Dr. Harville Hendrix, also needs to be acknowledged for his research into Imago Relationship Therapy. Without these people, the world would be considerably poorer. You changed my world. My secretary, receptionist, office manager and friend, Carmen Sear, who helped with typing, printing, creating graphs and tables. Thank you for your significant contribution toward completing this assignment. Thank you for your loyalty, kindness and dedication. You smooth the edges of my world. Without you this doctorate would have been considerably more difficult. My former business partner, Eleanor Bubb, for her support and the influence she had on my life. Dr. Cecile Gericke, who agreed, in spite of an extremely busy program, to read my thesis and made valuable contributions. Thank you for your kind assistance and friendship. To Debbie de Jongh, who took on the complex and onerous task of pruning my thesis into a workable format. As the doctorate represented my thinking and contributions of twenty years of work and personal experiences I held dear, it was so precious to me that I was unable to determine which parts are less essential parts, as it felt like disloyalty, similar to favouring one child above another. By being stringent with her editing and pruning, she provided me with clarity as to what I really attempted to communicate, and in the process shaped a more concise, stronger and to-thepoint body of work. To my friend, Sue Ivins, who stepped in to take over the role of editor on short notice, thank you for your prolific input into my thesis and the help you provided. Thank you Gerhard Hope who, at very short notice, agreed to do the final proofreading and editing.

5 v Dedication I would like to dedicate this work to my two wonderful and amazing god children, Megan and Damian Opperman. I watch the unfolding of your lives with wonder and intense gratitude. May your will be done. My baby brother, Jacques Opperman, whose exciting and fulfilling life came to a tragic and cruel end during the writing of this thesis. I learnt from your generous and life loving spirit. I miss your presence.