Maryland DeMolay Chapter Sweetheart Manual

Transcription

1 Maryland DeMolay Chapter Sweetheart Manual

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3 What is DeMolay? This section of your manual is devoted to basic knowledge about the Order of DeMolay. As a Sweetheart, it is important for you to understand the organization that you are representing. You need to be able to explain the order to prospective members, parents, and those who simply wish to learn more about DeMolay. The information included will help you to be more prepared for these situations, but know that there is always more to learn. It is strongly encouraged that you go beyond this manual. Research other available DeMolay resources. And always be open to learn more.

4 DeMolay is the world s largest fraternal organization for young men between the ages of 12 and a character building organization which prepares young men for civic, business, religious, fraternal and social activities an organization that teaches a young man to love and serve his God, his country, and his fellow man an organization that provides wholesome recreational and social activities with his peers an organization which instills leadership qualities and organizational skills that can be used for a lifetime. A LITTLE HISTORY DeMolay was founded in 1919 in Kansas City, Missouri. Frank S. Land was first drawn to organize DeMolay when he found himself in a position to assist a fatherless young man named Louis Lower. Dad Land, along with Louis and eight of his friends decided to form a group that brought young men together for the purpose of good with positive male role models. They decided to name their new group after Jacques DeMolay, the last leader of the Knights Templar. DeMolay was burned at the stake in DeMolay was particularly known for his devotion to loyalty and friendship. The Order of DeMolay grew and by March of 1922, chapter had been established in 39 of the then 48 states and the District of Columbia. The organization had gained so much popularity that on February 12, 1923, the Templar Chapter in Pittsburg, PA initiated 1,099 new members, the largest class in DeMolay history. Master Masons have supported the order since its inception, but support became official in 1963 with the signing of a Declaration of Principles by leaders of Freemasonry. Although DeMolay ritual and meetings are serious and reverent, the organization does not advocate any particular creed, but teaches only profound faith n one living and true God. DeMolay does not attempt to take the place of home or church but rather be a supplement them. Today DeMolay has over one million active and senior members including Hall of Fame members such as Mel Blanc, Col. Frank Borman, Walt Disney, Paul Harvey, Burl Ives, John Steinbeck, Bill Clinton, and John Wayne. Membership now spans the worldwide, including membership in Canada, Brazil, Bolivia, Aruba, Portugal, Panama, Italy, Germany, Australia, Philippines, Japan, and Columbia.

5 Mother Chapter at the Institution and Initiation Ceremony Mother Chapter traveled east in 1921 to institute new chapters. Mr. George Fleming Moore who was a very active Mason in Alabama in 1914, as Acting Grand Commander of the Supreme Council, was very helpful in starting DeMolay in the East. It was during this trip that the first DeMolay Chapter in Maryland, George Fleming Moore Chapter was instituted in Hyattsville on August 3, Mr. George Fleming Moore was present when Mother Chapter initiated the first class of twenty-five members of G. F. M. chapter which was the first chapter in DeMolay that was named after a living man. While in the area, the team also instituted Robert LeBruce Chapter on August 4th, in Washington, D. C., once part of Maryland DeMolay, and Baltimore Chapter in Baltimore, MD on August 5th. Mr. George Fleming Moore George Fleming Moore Chapter's First Initiation Class These pioneer chapters multiplied until the number of chapters in the state reached 21 thriving chapters and over 500 members and advisors. Currently we have seven chapters and over 200 members and advisors. Our Chapters have been named after beautiful cities in which they are a part of the community, famous and prestigious men of the community, and of Freemasonry, and their sponsoring bodies. Our Conclaves (conventions) have been hosted by our member chapters where able and have been held through out the state including the famous Lord Baltimore Hotel in the city of Baltimore, Maryland, and Salisbury State University on the Eastern Shore of Maryland. We feel, with the support of members, advisors, their communities in which they meet, and more importantly from our Masonic family, Maryland DeMolay will continue to offer a wide range of activities. It is through these activities of opportunities of leadership that the young men of DeMolay will receive the responsibility and the skills, to become the leaders of tomorrow.

6 THE SEVEN CARDINAL VIRTUES OF DeMOLAY As you probably have noticed, there are seven candles in the DeMolay Chapter room standing around the east side of the Altar. These candles are symbolic of the Seven Cardinal Virtues of DeMolay the principles that each DeMolay member strives to live by in his daily life. They are: Filial Love (Love of Parents) Reverence for Sacred Things Courtesy Comradeship Fidelity (Faithfulness) Cleanness Patriotism In addition to the Cardinal Virtues, DeMolay also try to live by a Code of Ethics. DeMOLAY CODE OF ETHICS A DeMolay serves God. A DeMolay honors all womanhood. A DeMolay loves and honors his parents. A DeMolay is honest. A DeMolay is loyal to ideals and friends. A DeMolay practices honest toil. A DeMolay s word is as good as his bond. A DeMolay is courteous. A DeMolay is at all times a gentleman. A DeMolay is a patriot in peace as well as in times of war. A DeMolay is clean in mind and body. A DeMolay stands unswervingly for public schools. A DeMolay always bears the reputation of a good and law-abiding citizen. A DeMolay by precept and example must preserve the high standards to which he has pledged himself.

7 WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? Like many groups, DeMolay is full of abbreviations, acronyms, and for shorts. shorthand can get confusing so here is a key to some of these code words. This DeMolay Codes: AHK Advisor s Honor Key AWP Adult Worker Profile BHK Blue Honor Key Chev Degree of Chevalier DAD The DeMolay Advisor Development training course, not to be confused with Dad a form of address for male advisors or parents. DI DeMolay International EO Executive Officer ES Executive Secretary ICS International Congress Secretary IMC International Master Councilor ISC The International Supreme Council, aka DeMolay International LCC Leadership Correspondence Course LOH Legion of Honor Degree MATOC Mid Atlantic Tournament of Champions Competition MSADC Maryland State Association of DeMolay Chapters PHK Pink Honor Key PMC Past Master Councilor PMC-MSA Past Master Councilor Meritorious Service Award PSMC Past State Master Councilor RD Representative DeMolay SMC State Master Councilor Common Masonic Codes: AF&AM Boumi IOJD IORG MM OES WM Ancient Free and Accepted Masons Boumi Temple - Baltimore Shriners International Order of Job s Daughters (HQ Honored Queen) International Order of Rainbow Girls (WA Worthy Advisor) Master Mason Order of the Eastern Star (WM Worthy Matron; WP Worthy Patron) Worshipful Master

8 THE AWARDS ADVISOR Find below a list of common DeMolay awards and ceremonies: LEGION OF HONOR (LOH) The highest award a Senior DeMolay can receive for outstanding service to humanity or success in his profession. Regalia is red Cordon and Medallion. HONORARY LEGION OF HONOR (HLOH) Citation of honor is conferred upon a Master Mason who has shown active civic leadership and who has performed unusual meritorious service for the Order of DeMolay. Regalia is white Cordon with Medallion. CROSS OF HONOR (COH) The highest award given for service as an Advisory Council member or a personal representative of an Executive Officer. Regalia is Medallion with DeMolay emblem. CHEVALIER DEGREE (Chev) The highest honor an active or senior DeMolay can receive for DeMolay service. Regalia is gold Cordon with Medallion. REPRESENTATIVE DEMOLAY (RD) The highest award a DeMolay can petition for and receive for self evaluation. BLUE HONOR KEY (BHK) An award giving recognition to a DeMolay who has been the first line signer on ten petitions. PINK HONOR KEY (PHK) An award given to a Job s Daughter or Rainbow Girl for being instrumental in securing five new members to DeMolay. PAST MASTER COUNSILOR MERITORIOUS SERVICE AWARD An award earned for outstanding service as a Master Councilor. HATS OFF AWARD An award given to a non-demolay recognizing service above and beyond the call to the Order. FLOWER TALK A beautiful open ceremony, once a part of the DeMolay initiation, to honor the mothers of DeMolay CEREMONY OF LIGHT An inspiring ceremony that centers itself around the Seven Cardinal Virtues represented by the seven DeMolay candles.

9 What is a Chapter Sweetheart? Congratulations! You have been selected for a very honorable position. The members of the chapter have chosen you to be their representative. Many girls before you have been elected to this position. While it is an honor to be chosen, many girls do not fully understand what the title signifies. It is more than a tiara and a sash, there is much responsibility required of this position. This section of your manual will lay out guidelines and expectations of you as a Sweetheart. Take time to review all that is provided. You will find that it will assist you greatly during your term. If there is a time that you need additional assistance, do you hesitate to contact your State Sweetheart Coordinator.

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11 THE MODEL SWEETHEART When you were elected, the Chapter members liked the person you really are. They enjoyed your charm and your company. Never try to be something that you are not that is not what you were elected for. Always show your best side. Smile, a pretty smile tells everyone that you like what you are doing. A Sweetheart is made up of many parts: a good listener, a good speaker, a hostess, a guest, a volunteer, and a leader, but most of all, a LADY!! Sweethearts should learn to approach every aspect of their term with an open mind. There are always changes, new ideas to learn, and problems to deal with. The Sweetheart should exemplify the highest ideals of womanhood. She is under constant observation and must always conduct herself in a lady-like manner. A Sweetheart is neat, well groomed, and sincerely dedicated to the order of DeMolay. Her aim should be to boost morale by adding beauty, charm, and excitement to all functions she attends. She should go out of her way to pay attention to EACH chapter member, to be friendly to all, and not forget the younger or more shy members who may be a bit reluctant to receive attention. You must remember that your warm smile and friendly manner are important to the promotion of your chapter. A Sweethearts duty is to be involved, to care and show pride in representing her chapter. She should learn more about the member in her chapter and take time to give encouragement and support when they need it. She will encourage the members to act as gentlemen. Her term is important to both herself and her chapter, so she should take care to handle it well, wisely, and with love. There are many positive and substantial efforts that a Sweetheart can make to demonstrate her commitment. If you are prepared and positive you will have a successful and memorable term, as well as a very appreciative chapter.

12 SMILE Everyone likes to see a smile TIPS FOR THE SUCCESSFUL SWEETHEART BE YOURSELF You were elected because the members wanted you, not someone else. GET TO KNOW YOUR CHAPTER You were elected by them, let them know that you care! SPEAK They know you can talk! Say something! Train yourself to speak (without shouting) so you can be heard. ASK QUESTIONS if you don t know something or are in doubt, please ask! LISTEN Sometimes you are needed to just be a sympathetic ear. Encourage members to talk to you, show you care. Let them know you are interested. VOLUNTEER There is always something you can do to help; ASK! ATTEND WORKSHOPS You can always learn something new. GET TO KNOW THE ADVISORS They can help you in all aspects of your term. They are there to help and they want you to have a good term, lean on them. SEND CARDS Send cards to your Chapter and to the members on holidays and special occasions. Pay attention to the special and difficult times that are occurring in member s lives. HELP Help with your Chapter s projects, dinners, publications, etc.. COMMUNICATE Be the liaison between the Chapter and Job s Daughters and Rainbow. PROMOTE Vigorously seek to enhance the membership of DeMolay DEDICATED Be sincerely dedicated to the Order. TAKE THE LEADERSHIP CORRESPONDENCE COURSE The LCC is a great way to learn more about the organization that your are representing. Course one is required to be completed to run for State Sweetheart. BE EXCITED As Chapter Sweetheart you can help to set the mood of the entire term. If you are excited to be a part of the Chapter rather than just the girl that gets to wear the tiara and sash you will find that the members are glad that they chose you and will be here for you as much as you can be there for them. GET READY, YOUR ABOUT TO HAVE A MEMORABLE YEAR!!!

13 SWEETHEART GUIDELINES ELIGIBILTY CRITERIA 1. Any young lady wishing to compete for the title of Chapter Sweetheart may submit an application to the Sweetheart Advisor or the Chapter Advisor when a Chapter does not have a Sweetheart Advisor 2. Sweethearts do not have to be members of Job s Daughters or Rainbow Girls. 3. A Chapter Sweetheart applicant must have permission of her parents/guardians to serve. 4. Each Chapter Sweetheart must maintain a C average in school during her term. (to be discreetly reviewed by the Chapter Dad on a regular basis) 5. A Sweetheart applicant must be willing to travel with her Chapter and chaperone. 6. Each Chapter will determine the age requirement for eligibility for their chapter competition. 7. No applicant may have reached the age of 21 at the time of election. 8. Each Chapter will determine when their Chapter will elect and install a new Chapter Sweetheart. Generally Sweethearts are elected for a one year term beginning at the January Installation (check with the Bylaws of your local chapter for details). 9. There are no term limits for Chapter Sweethearts and a Sweetheart may be permitted to run again for the position, subject to the approval of the Chapter Advisory Council. Applications for Sweetheart are found in this manual as Sweetheart you will provide a copy of this application to any young lady wishing to run. 10. If a Chapter Sweetheart fails to fulfill her duties and responsibilities outlined by this manual, she may be replaced by decision of her Chapter, the Advisory Council, the State Sweetheart Coordinator and/or the Executive Officer. 11. A Chapter Sweetheart cannot be married, pregnant, nor have a child. A Sweetheart that becomes pregnant or marries during her term will be immediately removed from office and is ineligible to receive the title of Past Sweetheart or receive a Past Sweetheart pin or other emblem. First runner-up will automatically assume the title. 12. When a Chapter Sweetheart is elected as State Sweetheart, her Chapter title will automatically be transferred to the first runner-up during the most recent election. Should there be no runner-up, the Chapter will decide whether to hold new elections. 13. No Chapter Sweetheart may run for or serve as State Sweetheart if serving as the Grand Worthy Advisor, Grand Bethel Honored Queen or Miss Maryland Job s Daughters. 14. If a Sweetheart is required to leave the state with an intention of a 90 day or more absence, she must resign her office. First runner-up will automatically assume the position. Please note that each Chapter may have individual requirements and guidelines for those wishing to run for Chapter Sweetheart. Please check with the Chapter Dad of your Chapter for additional information. Those desiring to run for State Sweetheart can find additional information in the State Sweetheart Section of this Manual.

14 GENERAL DUTIES AND RESPONSIBILITIES: 1. Get to know all members of the Chapter even the younger and less popular members. 2. Attend most meetings of the Chapter, especially their installation. 3. Always be available to assist. Let members know that you are interested and want to be there for them. Be ready to serve in any capacity. 4. Work together with the Master Councilor to plan special events and activities. Go out of your way to use your initiative in helping with fundraising, dances and other fun activities. 5. Attend all Chapter activities which are appropriate to attend. 6. Be on time being late makes a bad impression 7. Practice good manners and be considerate of others. 8. Provide members with an opportunity to practice their etiquette skills. 9. Help younger members or those with special needs to enter into social environments. 10. Strive to be helpful if you volunteer to help, be sure to follow through. 11. Dance with any DeMolay who asks you. No is not an option. You may be the first person he has ever danced with. 12. Keep a forearms length distance away from whoever you are dancing with. 13. Work vigorously to enhance the membership of DeMolay by promoting DeMolay to young men who you feel would make good members. Keep a supply of membership literature and have an active member follow up on your recommendation. 14. Act as a liaison between Job s Daughters Bethel s and Rainbow Girls Assemblies in the area, by communicating upcoming events and activities. 15. Attend all Sweetheart workshops. 16. Vigorously seek to enhance the attendance, participation and membership of your Chapter. 17. Maintain a cooperative attitude with the Chapter Advisors. 18. Serve as a hostess to visiting Sweethearts. 19. No chewing gum on any occasion. 20. No Smoking on any occasion. 21. Do not use profanity at any time. 22. Never travel alone. 23. At no time shall a Sweetheart ride up-chaperoned in the same vehicle as a DeMolay going to or from a DeMolay function. No DeMolay member is at any time to drive a Chapter Sweetheart with or with out a Chaperone. 24. At no time (chaperoned or not) is a Sweetheart allowed in a DeMolay room or a DeMolay in a Sweetheart room during overnight functions. 25. Sweethearts do not have the privilege to attend closed meetings and should not appear to be listening at an outer door. She may attend the at ease portion of the meeting. 26. One of the duties of the Master Councilor is to see that you are properly escorted, either by himself or another member of the Chapter. Expect this behavior at all times. 27. Do not accept improper behavior from any DeMolay member or Advisor. Inform the Sweetheart Coordinator and/or Chapter Advisor immediately if you have been the recipient of inappropriate behavior. 28. Be prepared to speak at your chapter or when representing DeMolay. 29. Make sure to thank all those who help you during your term. **Maryland DeMolay has a zero-tolerance policy toward drug and alcohol use. Any sweetheart who is under the influence of either at any function will be immediately removed from office.

15 DRESS CODE As a Sweetheart, the manner in which you dress should be a major concern. You will be under constant observation. Your appearance can say many things about you, both positive and negative. Remember that you are representing Maryland DeMolay, your chapter, your family, and yourself. The Maryland Sweetheart dress code needs to be fitting to the event and DeMolay decorum and should be followed at all times. As Sweetheart you should promote this code with all female visitors. When a functions dress code is unclear seek advice from your chapter Sweetheart Advisor or the State Sweetheart Coordinator. Remember, when in doubt it is better to be over dressed than underdressed. The Sweetheart Dress code is assigned very clearly below. There should NEVER be an excuse for not knowing the code!! Formal Attire: Installations, Sweetheart Ball, Conclave designated meetings, Public Formal Ceremonies - Full or ¾ length, properly fitting, formal dress - Slits can not be higher than the knee - Backs can be no lower than the natural bra line - Proper undergarments, including slips and hose will be worn - Shoes will be proper to the occasion no slippers, boots, athletic shoes, flip flops - Tiara and Banner are to be worn Business Attire: Installations (when not escorted), Chapter Meetings, Workshops, Dinners, Business Meetings - Properly fitting business suit, dress, or skirt - No shorter than knee length - Full length shirts, no midriffs, no visible undergarments, no low front cuts - Slits can not be higher than the knee - Backs can be no lower than the natural bra line - Proper undergarments, including slips and hose will be worn - Shoes will be proper to the occasion no slippers, boots, athletic shoes, flip flops - Tiara and Banner are to be worn Casual Attire: Movie Nights, Service Activities, Work Parties, Decorating, Sports Activities - Properly fitting casual slacks, or shorts, that are mid thigh or longer - Jeans/jean shorts may be worn if properly fitted, neat, with no holes - Full length shirts, no midriffs, no visible undergarments, no low front cuts - Proper undergarments - Shoes will be proper to the occasion - Tiara and Banner are NOT to be worn - Acceptable swimsuits will be one piece suits or a swimsuit with no more than 3 inches of midriffs visible. NO THONGS OR STING BIKINIS. Cover ups should be worn to and from the pool area.

16 OTHER DRESS CODE DO S and DON TS DO be clean and neatly dressed DO have well groomed hair DO be an example for visiting females DO keep your banner and tiara clean DO dress in a manner representing womanhood DO wear your banner with dress pants never jeans DO NOT wear your tiara with pants/jeans DO NOT wear your tiara/banner to Job s Daughters or Rainbow functions unless specifically representing the Order of DeMolay DO NOT change into casual attire at a function until all good-byes have been said and you are ready to leave DO NOT wear your tiara in a vehicle DO NOT wear grunge, gothic or un-hemmed clothing DO NOT wear shirts with inappropriate logos or sayings DO NOT allow any DeMolay to wear your tiara and you are not to wear a DeMolay s jewel. GENERAL APPEARANCE Sloppy, age inappropriate, too tight or small clothing are inappropriate. Clothes should be clean and properly fitted. Garish make-up, nails, or hair styles are inappropriate. Make up should be light and appealing. Body Markings (i.e. piercings, irregular jewelry, and tattoos) should be discreetly covered. Modest earring jewelry, may however be worn. If it would not be accepted by Rainbow Girls or Job s Daughters standards, it will NOT be tolerated in DeMolay. When in doubt seek the advice of your Chapter Sweetheart Advisor or the State Sweetheart Coordinator. ** If at anytime a Sweetheart is deemed to not be dressed appropriately as determined by the Executive Officer, State Sweetheart Coordinator, or Chapter Dad, she will be asked to change, leave, or not be allowed to represent the order at the function. ** Repeated violation of these Dress Codes may be cause for suspension or removal from your position.

17 SWEETHEART CHAPERONES You must have a Chaperone with you at all functions you attend as a Chapter Sweetheart, REGARDLESS OF YOUR AGE! A Chaperone must be at least twenty-five (25) years of age. If not a parent, your chaperone must be approved prior to a function by the Chapter Advisor and your Parents, since she will be responsible for you at a DeMolay activity. Please make sure that your Chaperone knows that she is responsible to make sure that you are abiding by the rules and guidelines set forth in this manual and by the MSADC Constitution and Bylaws. The Chaperone shall: - Conform to the rules and regulations set forth in the Sweetheart Manual. - Know the responsibilities of a Chapter Sweetheart. - Make sure the Chapter Sweetheart obeys the dress code. - Make sure that the Sweetheart obeys curfews (when established). - Make sure that the Sweetheart has proper travel arrangements to/from a function. Your chaperone is doing you a favor, so be considerate of her. After certain special functions you should consider giving a thank you note and a small thank you gift. A FEMALE Chaperone is required each time that you make overnight plans. Whether you are staying at another Sweetheart s house as part of a visitation, Convention, other travel event you must have a female Chaperone or parent present. At all other functions which are NOT overnight, if a female chaperone is not available an advisor of your chapter may serve as your chaperone. The State Sweetheart Coordinator may also serve as a chaperone at any function representing DeMolay however, please do not assume that she will be your chaperone, make prior arrangements. If you have difficulty obtaining a chaperone, contact your Parent s Club, Advisory Council, or the State Sweetheart Coordinator for assistance.

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19 What Can a Sweetheart Do? This may be the most important section of your manual. To hit the mark as an excellent Sweetheart, you must take an active part in your position. You can t build up a good reputation on what you are going to do. In fact, you must ACT for your Chapter. Included in this section are many ideas and suggestions that you as a Sweetheart can do!!

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21 What You Can Do to Achieve Sweetheart Success?? As a Sweetheart, you were elected to become a supportive figure for the Chapter. By working with the Chapter you will have a successful term. Here are several things you can do for you Chapter: Always have a sincere, warm, and friendly smile for everyone. Always strive to abide by the virtues of DeMolay: Filial Love, Reverence for Sacred Things, Courtesy, Comradeship, Fidelity, Cleanness, and Patriotism. Help the Telephone committee, if one exists. Become a friend to all in your chapter. Write a DeMolay in the service of our country, Remember birthdays and holidays with cards. Send Get well and sympathy cards to members and families when appropriate. Attend the meetings of the Parent s Club support them! Enter all Sweetheart, MSADC, etc. contests. Attend all Sweetheart Workshops learn as much as possible. Be a hostess to visiting Sweethearts. Help plan Sweetheart activities. Remind members of upcoming activities. Support and help plan Chapter fundraisers. Help serve at breakfasts, luncheons, dinners, and receptions. Assist with decorations, publications, and committees. Make items for members at special occasions. Help recruit new members. Keep a scrapbook for your Master Councilor and yourself. Assist the Master Councilor-elect with his installation plans when possible. Maintain a book of ideas and hints for the next Chapter Sweetheart. Maintain communication with members, advisors, Sweetheart Advisor, the State Sweetheart Coordinator, and State Sweetheart. If you are active and enthusiastic you will have a most rewarding term as a sweetheart.

22 NEED AN IDEA?? Listed below are some sure to be successful ideas for activities that you can suggest or organize yourself for the Chapter. You are of course not limited to these ideas. Create some of your own be creative! Please remember to consult with your Master Councilor and Advisory Council before planning an activity/event. If you have spirit and keep the best interest of the Chapter in mind you will find that each event will be a blast! Be Prepared! Plan Ahead! Invite Everyone! Good Luck! FUND RAISERS FELLOWSHIP 1. Dances (special themes) 1. Dances 2. Car Washes 2. Movie/Game Nights 3. Dinners/Breakfasts 3. Football/Pool Parties 4. Yard Work 4. Picnics 5. T-Shirt Sales 5. Bowling 6. Candy Sales 6. Mystery Trips 7. Height Nights 7. Progressive/Regressive Dinners 8. Christmas Card Sales 8. Scavenger Hunt/Geocashing 9. Current Sales 9. Hay Rides 10. Carnivals 10. Hawaiian Luau 11. Flower Sale 11. Mini-Golf 12. Fruit Sales 12. Sight Seeing **Also consider organizing charitable/volunteer activities. These are good for the order and a person s heart. They can sometimes also fulfill state graduation requirements! REMEMBER TO ALWAYS HAVE PROMOTION MATERIAL ON HAND AT EACH EVENT AS THESE ACTIVITIES CAN ALL BE USED AS A MEANS TO PROMOTE BOTH YOUR CHAPTER AND DEMOLAY IN GENERAL.

23 COMMUNICATION OTHER WAYS TO BE A GOOD SWEETHEART!! One of the best ways to be a good sweetheart is to have good communication with anyone interested in DeMolay. Here are some ways to keep the lines of communication open remember you can communicate through phone calls, s, the state web page, paper notices, invitations, and public announcements. People to contact: Master Councilor Chapter Dad President of Parents Club Chapter Sweetheart Advisor State Sweetheart State Sweetheart Coordinator State Master Councilor Executive Officer State Web Master President State Parent s Club

24 PARENT S CLUB What is a Parent s Club? It is an auxiliary organization composed of a group of parents and relatives of the chapter members. Parent s Clubs provide guidance, encouragement, and assistance to the chapters. They assist them with social activities and fundraisers and promote the welfare of the chapter as a whole. The object of the Parent s Club is to lend cooperation and support to members and the Advisory Council. Work with the Parent s Club whenever you are arranging an activity. They are anxious to assist and support you during your term. Volunteer to help them as well. Having an active Parent s Club in your chapter is a vital asset and is one of the best things a Sweetheart could ask for. Be active with the Parent s Club and their projects and meetings and they will be there for you as well. If you respect these people, they will respect, accept, and support you. LEADERSHIP CORRESPONDENCE COURSE (L.L.C.) The L.C.C. is a course designed to broaden your knowledge of DeMolay. There are five courses. DeMolay s, Sweethearts, Parents and Friends of DeMolay are all encouraged to take the courses. State Sweetheart Candidates are required to have completed the first L.C.C., which is Basic DeMolay Knowledge. To take the test, you must send the L.C.C. application form and a nominal fee to the Maryland State Association of DeMolay Chapters, Executive Secretary. They will then mail you part 1. Once they have received the completed part 1 from you, and you have passed, you will then have the option to send away for part 2. Although all State Sweetheart Candidates are required to pass the first part of this course, all Sweethearts are strongly encouraged to also complete this course. If you complete all five courses, you will be eligible to receive the prestigious Lamp of Knowledge pin.

25 MEMBERSHIP Each year, each chapter should strive to initiate 100% of their membership goal. A Sweetheart can help in this endeavor by generating enthusiasm and when approached can show cause to a young man and his parents why he should join DeMolay. This does not mean that you should overwhelm a young man but merely point out the benefits of being a member of the Order of DeMolay. Never put DeMolay down. Speak positively on behalf of the organization. Explain the various activities and know what you are talking about. The Leadership Correspondence Course will be of great benefit to you here. If you know a young man that meets the requirements, invite him to your next function or activity. Introduce him to the members and let him hear about DeMolay from her peers. Each chapter should have a continual membership drive going on. You should find out what they are doing and offer to help. Prospect parties are always a good idea to stimulate membership. And who is better at planning parties than a Sweetheart? DEMOLAY MEMBERSHIP: Any young man who is at least twelve (12) years of age but has not yet become twenty-one (21), and who is of good moral character and believes in a Supreme Being is eligible to become a member of the Order of DeMolay. Membership is not limited to sons or relatives of a Master Mason, but the application must be recommended by a Mason. For your convenience, a petition is included in this manual so you will always be prepared when you meet a young man who is interested in becoming a member. **REMEMBER: Sweethearts can earn the Pink Honor Key Award by being responsible for signing the petitions for 5 new members. This campaign will be co-chaired by the State Sweetheart and State Sweetheart Coordinator NEW MEMBERS New members are the lifeline of the Chapter. Without them the Order would soon die, but somehow many members seem to become lost or forgotten after they are initiated. The members of your chapter may innocently neglect the new members. If, on his initiation, a new member feel that he is not welcome or left out, chances are pretty good that he won t come back for a second meeting or to get his DeMolay degree. He will also never learn how friendly the members of his chapter can really be. As the Chapter Sweetheart, you can really help the new member feel welcome. Introduce yourself and include him in your socializing. Inform him personally of upcoming events and try to see to it that he has a ride. Exchange phone numbers and be his Big Sister until he gets acquainted with the rest of the Chapter members. Never let a new member go home thinking that the DeMolay virtue of brotherhood is just an idea and not a reality.

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27 Chapter Sweetheart Application Chapter: Term: Name: Birth Date: Address: Telephone: Address: School, Grade Level, and Grade Average: Assembly/Bethel and Current Office: Other Groups/Organizations you belong to Hobbies/Talents/Interests: Do you have any priorities that might prevent you from performing your Sweetheart Duties, please list: Will you have transportation to DeMolay events? Yes No Do you understand the DeMolay Dress Code? Yes No Please prepare/type a one-page letter of intent and attach to this application. Include: 1. Why you would like to be a Sweetheart for this Chapter, 2. What your goals may be for your term if elected. Remember that this will be read at the Chapter before voting takes place! I am recommending the above Sweetheart Applicant Sponsoring DeMolay Member I approve the above Application for Sweetheart Chapter Advisor I give permission to my daughter to serve, if elected as Chapter Sweetheart. I have been informed of the commitment required, the chaperone policy, dress code, and general rules as outlined in the Chapter Sweetheart Manual (that will be provided if elected). Parent or Guardian Signature Date I agree to cooperate with the Chapter and MSADC in improving the interest of the Order. Should I be elected to serve as Chapter Sweetheart I agree to abide by all the guidelines set forth in the Chapter Sweetheart Manual. Applicant s Signature Date

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29 Medical Release and Consent Form Jurisdiction: Sweetheart Name: Chapter: DOB: 1. I, the undersigned Parent or Legal Guardian of do here by give my consent and permission for her to participate in the Maryland DeMolay Sweetheart Program. 2. In the event of any injury or illness to the above named minor, I the undersigned Parent or Legal Guardian, hereby authorize any adult DeMolay Advisor or Sweetheart Coordinator in attendance to secure, and any physician in attendance to provide such emergency medical treatment as shall be deemed necessary by those present, including but not limited to hospitalization, injections, anesthesia, surgery, x-ray, blood, and medications. I understand reasonable effort shall be made to contact me prior to medical treatment. 3. The above named minor is subject to the following problems, allergies to medications, and/or is receiving treatment under the supervision of proper medical authorities as follows: State on the lines below, if none state NONE. 4. Neither DeMolay International, Maryland DeMolay, nor Maryland DeMolay Sweetheart Program, maintains any medical insurance for its members. I understand that we will be responsible for any and all costs for medical treatments incurred by or on behalf of our daughter. My family health insurance and policy number are as follows: Insurance Company Name Policy Number(s) Policy Holders Name 5. I, the undersigned Parent or Legal Guardian, AND the undersigned legal minor, do hereby agree that we will abide by the Statutes, Rules, Regulations, and Edicts of the Maryland DeMolay Sweetheart Program, Maryland DeMolay, and the International Supreme Council, Order of DeMolay, and its duly authorized representatives. We agree that if in the opinion of any DeMolay Advisor and/or Sweetheart Coordinator that if either of us should be removed or asked to leave any DeMolay or Sweetheart activity for violation of the same,

30 that the undersigned parent or legal guardian will immediately take the necessary action to cause the transportation of violator from the activity site at the expense of the undersigned Parent or Guardian. 6. We hereby agree to release and hold harmless the International Supreme Council, Order of DeMolay, the Grand Master of DeMolay, staff members, Advisors, and Sweetheart Coordinator of the Maryland Jurisdiction, Order of DeMolay, from any and all claims of cause of action which the undersigned has or may have. This specifically includes any and all plans which arrive out of the attendance at event, including transportation to and from said event. 7. IN THE EVENT OF ANY EMERGENCY, IF THE UNDERSIGNED PARENT OR GUARDIAN CANNOT BE REACHED, THE UNDERSIGNED PARENT OR GUARDIAN HEREBY AUTHORIZES THE FOLLOWING PERSON TO ACT ON THEIR BEHALF. Name: Phone: Address: Relationship to Minor: 8. Parent/Legal Guardian, please provide the following information about yourself: Full Name: Address: Phone: Home Work Cell Other Relationship to Minor: 9. If minor s address is different than Parent or Legal Guardian, please state of lines below, if the same, write SAME. Signature of Parent or Legal Guardian Date Signature of Minor (Sweetheart) Date

31 Sweetheart Resources The following pages have been added to help you fulfill your term as Chapter Sweetheart. Included is the Golden Heart Award and application, the MSADC Constitution and Bylaws, miscellaneous graphics, and a brochure discussing cults. In addition to what you have already read in your manual, these resources will assist to increase your knowledge of DeMolay and increase the success of your term.

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33 THE GOLDEN HEART AWARD This award has been created for active Chapter Sweethearts. It is designed to promote greater Sweetheart involvement in DeMolay and to award Sweethearts for their dedicated commitment to the Order. A Sweetheart must earn 100 points to be eligible for this award, earning at least 25 points in each to the three categories. The remaining 25 or more points may be earned in any area. Awards will be presented at Conclave. Any Sweetheart who has earned enough points by the annual Conclave will receive her award. However, if you have not earned points by the annual Conclave, you are still eligible for this award, if you receive enough points by the end of your current term as Sweetheart. Awards not presented at Conclave will be awarded at your Chapter s installation. The three categories are divided as State, Chapter, and Sweetheart activities. Each activity is listed with a point value assigned. In the spaces provided, each activity must be described, dated, and signed by an advisor attending the activity. Forms must be turned into the State Sweetheart Coordinator by the Friday evening curfew at Conclave. For those who complete the program after Conclave, forms should be mailed directly to the State Sweetheart Coordinator and arrive by one week before the Chapter Installation. THE STATE SWEETHEART IS NOT ELIGIBLE FOR THIS AWARD. If you have any questions regarding this award or the requirements, please contact the State Sweetheart or State Sweetheart Coordinator. We hope that this award program will help make your term a success and will show the state your DeMolay Spirit!! GOOD LUCK!!!

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35 GOLDEN HEART AWARD APPLICATION This application must be completed and attached to the Golden Heart Activities form. All Chapter Sweethearts are eligible. To receive award at Conclave applications must be turned in by the Friday night curfew at Conclave. To receive award at Chapter Installation application must be received one week prior to your Chapters Installation. All applications must be submitted to the State Sweetheart Coordinator. Name Chapter Age Date Installed Address Phone By signing this form, I agree that all the information included with this application is to my knowledge true and complete. Sweetheart Signature Date Chapter Advisor Signature Date Do Not Write Below This Line Date Received Date Awarded Signed SSCoordinator

36 GOLDEN HEART AWARD FORM (100 Points Total Needed; 25 From Each Category ; 25 Random) CHAPTER ACTIVITIES DATE INITIALS 1. Plan or help plan a Chapter Fundraisers (10) 2. Plan or help plan a Chapter Fellowship night (10) (movies, miniature golf, etc) 3. Plan or help plan a Chapter Promotional activity (10) (fair booth, lodge visit, newspaper article, etc.) 4. Bring refreshments to a Chapter meeting (5) (only three qualify) 5. Participate in an Obligatory Day Observance (5) 6. Attend a Parents Club Meeting (5) Other TOTAL CHAPTER ACTIVITIES POINTS

37 STATE ACTIVITIES DATE INITIALS 1. Attend the Annual Conclave (15) 2. Refreshments for your Chapters State Visitation(10) 3. Attend MSADC State Installation (10) 4. Attend another Chapter s Installation (5) Other: 5. Write an article for Reflections (5) 6. Attend an MSADC (not a chapter) dance (5) 7. Attend a MSADC athletic event (5) (only two count) TOTAL STATE ACTIVITIES POINTS

38 SWEETHEART ACTIVITIES DATE INITIALS 1. Bring in a New Member (35) 2. Complete Part 1 of the L.C.C. (10) 3. Complete more parts of the L.C.C. (15) 4. Attend a Sweetheart Workshop (10) 5. Attend the State Sweetheart Ball (5) 6. Enter a MSADC or Sweetheart Competition, when allowed (5) (State Sweetheart, Quiz Bowl, Conclave specials, etc.) Other: TOTAL SWEETHEART ACTIVITIES POINTS You are encouraged to participate in more activities that then spaces allow. Please list additional activities on a separate sheet of paper. If you are unsure about an activity contact the State Sweetheart Coordinator. GOOD LUCK!

39 DeMolay Emblems and Logos (present) DeMolay Emblem (Color) DeMolay Emblem (B&W) DeMolay Emblem (photo) DeMolay International Logo (color) DeMolay International Logo (blue) DeMolay International Logo (B&W) Maryland DeMolay Logos past and present Official MSADC Emblem (color) Official MSADC Emblem (B&W) DeMolay Historical Emblems and Logos DI-Maryland DeMolay logo (color) Old MSADC logo (color) Old MSADC logo (B&W) (photo) (photo)

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41 CONSTITUTION OF THE MARYLAND STATE ASSOCIATION OF DeMOLAY CHAPTERS ARTICLE I - NAME AND ALLEGIANCE Section 1. NAME The name of this association is: The Maryland State Association of DeMolay Chapters. Section 2. ALLEGIANCE This Association acknowledges the authority of, and yields allegiance to DeMolay International, which Frank S. Land was founder, and to the Executive Officer in the State of Maryland, under whose authority and supervision this Association shall be governed. ARTICLE II - PURPOSE The purpose of this Association will be to: (1) coordinate DeMolay activities in the State of Maryland, (2) promote the improved welfare of DeMolays and Advisors in Maryland, (3) unite the DeMolay Chapters in Maryland in a program of activities which are interesting fun, and will promote the educational and physical development of all participants. ARTICLE III -MEMBERSHIP Section 1. MEMBERS All legally constituted DeMolay Chapters in the State of Maryland are members of this association. Section 2. REPRESENTATION a. Each chapter shall be represented by three (3) delegates of their respective chapter. b. All chapters will elect alternate(s) to serve if the designated delegate(s) are not present. c. All delegates will have one (1) vote. It is the duty of the Advisory Council to ensure the presence of all delegates of their Chapter. The advisory Council may appoint a qualified member(s) to serve in the event the Chapter fails to elect alternate(s). d. Any Chapter that has failed to file any reports, or has not paid all sums due to the association, as required by the Executive Officer, will not be seated, heard in debate, or allowed to vote. Voting by proxy is not permitted. ARTICLE IV - OFFICERS Section 1. ELIGIBILITY Each officer of this Association must, at the time of his election or appointment, be a member in good standing of a DeMolay Chapter, that is a member in good standing of this Association. Elected officers must be Past Master Councilors of a Chapter, and must be at least sixteen (16) years of age at the time of their Installation. Elected state officers must be unmarried at the time of their election, and must remain unmarried while in office. Candidates for elected state office must have completed course number four (4) of the Leadership Correspondence Course, or have attended a DeMolay Leaders Conference or Key-Man Conference. Candidate for State Master Councilor must have served in a subordinate elected state office. Section 2. ELECTED OFFICERS The elected officers of this Association will be: State Master Councilor

42 Deputy State Master Councilor Each will serve for one year, or until his successor is elected and installed: unless sooner removed for cause by the Executive Officer, or by a two-thirds (2/3) vote of delegates present and vote at a meeting of this Association. No elected officer shall secede himself unless he shall fail to advance to the next highest office. Section 3. ELECTIONS Each elected officer will be elected at the Conclave meeting of this Association, by an affirmative vote of a majority of the delegates present and voting. Section 4. LETTERS OF INTENT A DeMolay desiring to run for elected state office must file a letter of intent with the Executive Officer not later than thirty (30) days before the first day of Conclave. The letter must state the office(s) for which he is a candidate, and must be counter signed by one of his parents or guardians, and either the Chairman of the Advisory Council, or Chapter Advisor, of his chapter. Section 5. TERM PLAN AND BUDGET After his election and before his installation, the State Master Councilor elect will present a term plan and term budget to the Executive Officer for his approval. Section 6. VACANCIES a. When a vacancy occurs in the office of State Master Councilor, the Deputy State Master Councilor will automatically succeed to the vacant office. A special election will be held, if automatic succession does not fill the vacancy in an elected office, first giving notice of three (3) weeks to the chapters. b. A Letter of Intent (per Section 4) for special election must be filed with the Executive Officer no later then ten (10) days prior to the election. c. When the vacancy occurs in the office of State Master Councilor and was filled by the Deputy State Master Councilor, he will be eligible for one subsequent full term as State Master Councilor. Section 7. INSTALLATION With the consent of the Executive Officer, the State Master Councilor- Elect, shall set the installation of officers. time and place of the Section 8. APPOINTED OFFICERS The State Master Councilor may appoint, with the approval of the Executive Officer, such additional officers as may seem appropriate to the proper functioning of the Association. Such appointed officers will serve at the will and pleasure of the State Master Councilor and the Executive Officer. ARTICLE V - COMMITTEES The State Master Councilor may appoint, with the approval of the Executive Officer, such committees as may seem appropriate to the proper functioning of the Association. Such committees and their chairman will serve at the will and pleasure of the State Master Councilor and the Executive Officer. ARTICLE VI - MEETINGS Section 1. MEETINGS The meetings of this Association will be held semi- annually and will be held at the annual Conclave and the University of DeMolay Campus. Chapters will be provided thirty (30) days written notice of time and place of the meeting.

43 Section 2. SPECIAL MEETINGS The State Master Councilor, with the approval of the Executive Officer, may call a special meeting of this Association. Chapters will be notified promptly to the time and place of the special meeting. ARTICLE VII - QUORUM A quorum at all meetings will be considered present if delegates from a majority of the member chapters in good standing are present. In the absence of a quorum, the Executive Officer may declare that the meeting is in order for the conduct of any and all business. ARTICLE VIII - PARTICIPATION Section 1. MEMBERS All active DeMolays in good standing in a member chapter of this Association are eligible to attend all meetings. With the permission of the State Master Councilor, they may take part in the discussions on the floor and make constructive suggestions to the Association. Section 2. REGISTRATION In order to register for any meeting, all delegates must present a membership card and an obligation card attesting to their membership in a member chapter of this Association. Registration will be through an agent of the State Master Councilor prior to the opening of each session. section 3. COMPETITIVE ACTIVITIES No DeMolay may participate in any of the competitive activities held under the auspices of this Association unless he is a member in good standing of a member chapter, in good standing of this Association, and has been issued an obligation proficiency card. ARTICLE IX - VOTING Section 1. MAJORITY VOTE A majority vote of the delegates present and voting at any meeting will constitute the decision of this Association, unless otherwise required by this Constitution. Section 2. METHOD OF VOTING Voting may be done orally or by show of hands. The State Master Councilor will determine the method of voting, and besides the above, may call for a standing vote, or a written ballot. ARTICLE X - DUTIES OF THE OFFICERS Section 1. STATE MASTER COUNCILOR The State Master Councilor will preside at all meetings of this Association, receive all distinguished guests and visitors, have the prerogative of being received with honors in all chapters of this jurisdiction, provide all reports necessary for the government of this Association. See that the administrative duties of his officers and appointments are conducted; promote the Order of DeMolay throughout the jurisdiction. He will prepare a written report of his activities in office, and will present it at the Conclave meeting of this Association. It will become a part of the minutes of that meeting. He will transmit to his successor any records and paraphernalia pertinent to the administration of the office of State Master Councilor. Section 2. DEPUTY STATE MASTER COUNCILOR The Deputy State Master Councilor will preside at meetings in the unavoidable absence of the State Master Councilor, and will otherwise assist the State Master Councilor and Executive Officer in the promotion and operation of this Association.

44 ARTICLE XI - FINANCIAL AUDITS The Executive Officer will appoint an auditing committee to examine the books of the Association, and make a report to the Association. ARTICLE XII - FEES Section 1. FEES DUE The Executive Officer shall from time to time, assess member chapters fees for insurance and any other charges deemed necessary. Section 2. NOTICE OF FEES DUE The Executive Officer will notify the chapters when these fees are due and to be paid. Chapters delinquent in their payment of sums due this Association may not participate in any sports or ritual competitions, nor may delegates be seated, heard in discussion, or vote at any meetings of the Association. Section 3. REINSTATEMENTS Upon payment of all delinquent sums, chapters will be reinstated and are eligible to once again participate in all Association activities, providing that such chapters are current with their Annual Advisor Certification. Section 4. FUNDS Funds belonging to this Association will be deposited in approved banks or other financial initiations / organizations as directed by the Executive Officer. Funds may be paid out in accordance with a budget approved by or upon order of the Executive Officer. All payments will be made by check requiring two (2) signatures. The Executive Officer will, from time to time, promulgate a list of authorized signatures for checks. ARTICLE XIII - PROCEDURES Robert s Rules of Order will govern the meeting procedures of this Association. The Executive Officer shall have the authority to render any part or parts of this Constitution overruled or negated when the best interest of the fraternity shall be served. ARTICLE XIV - ACTIVITIES AND FUNCTIONS All activities and functions of this Association, its member chapters, or appendant bodies, will be supervised by an advisor, who is an approved adult worker, as prescribed by DeMolay International. The advisor s duty is to ensure that the activity or function is governed in accordance with the Statutes of DeMolay International and this Constitution, as well as in accordance with the principles and precepts of the Order of DeMolay ARTICLE XV - AMENDMENTS Amendments to this Constitution must be submitted, in writing, to the Executive Officer at least forty-five (45) days in advance of the next meeting of this Association. Unless such amendments are determined to be contrary to the Statutes of the International Supreme Council, they will be forwarded to each chapter at least thirty (30) days prior to the next meeting of the Association. Amendments will be present at the meeting, and will require a two-thirds (2/3) majority vote of the delegates present and voting in order to pass. Such amendments will go into effect immediately upon passage, unless otherwise directed by the Executive Officer. Approved this 15 day of June, 1998 Robert W. England, Executive Officer in Maryland ATTEST: William C. Eppig Executive Secretary in Maryland

45 PROCEDURES OF THE MARYLAND STATE ASSOCIATION OF DeMOLAY CHAPTERS FUNDS No Chapter or Appendant Organization shall be allowed general operation from a savings account. The general operating funds shall be received and disbursed from a checking account with two (2) signatures required. Funds belonging to a DeMolay Chapter or Appendant Organization shell not be deposited into any other account except those that are titled under the Chapter s name or the Appendant Body s name. Co-mingling of funds is not permitted under any Circumstances. AUDITS AND REPORTS The Executive Officer shall require. In accordance with the regulations of DeMolay International, annual financial reports from all Chapters, Foundations, Courts, and all other Appendant Organizations. Audit reports may be required from time to time. Failure to submit any report as requested and required by the Executive Officer shall result in suspension of Chapter operations. FORM 11 All Chapters shall file with the Executive officer, the names, addresses, and telephone numbers of the Councilors, Scribe, the Chapter Sweetheart, and the President of the Parent s Club. This information shall be provided on a Form 11. This form will be forwarded to the Executive Officer within ten (10) days of the Installation of the Chapter. EXPENSES 1. The Elected Officers of this Association shall be paid for travel expenses incurred in the discharge of their respective DeMolay duties. A prescribed itinerary report must be submitted to the Executive Officer, with receipts, which will be reviewed and paid by the Association as fellows: State Master Councilor - Up to $ annually unless he resides 150 miles or more from Baltimore, Maryland, then he shall receive up to $ annually. EXPENSES CONTINUE Deputy State Master Councilor - Up to $ annually. Itinerary reports must identify the date, location, function, purpose of travel, and are due as fellows: 1 ST Quarter September - November Due by December 15 2 nd Quarter December - February Due by March 15 3 rd Quarter March - May Due by June 15 4 th Quarter June - August Due by September 15 Failure to submit itineraries by the due date could result in non-payment for the quarter. 2. Telephone, postage, and other appropriate bills are to be submitted to the State P.O. Box on a monthly basis. Receipts must be submitted with the request for the reimbursement. A copy of the telephone bill with a explanation of the purpose of the contact must be included with any telephone reimbursement request. Bills received for payment after Thirty (30) days may not be paid.

46 Approved this 15 day of June, 1998 Robert W. England, Executive Officer in Maryland ATTEST: William C. Eppig Executive Secretary in Maryland Pages: A-2 Dated 8/01 A-3 Dated 8/01 A-6 Dated 8/01 Of The Constitution of the Maryland State Association of DeMolay Chapters Has been approved as Amended this 3 day of August, 2001 Robert W. England, Executive Officer in Maryland ATTEST: William C. Eppig Executive Secretary in Maryland Page: B-2 Dated 8/01 Of The Procedures of the Maryland State Association of DeMolay Chapters Has been Approved as Amended this 3 day of August, 2001 Robert W. England, Executive Officer of Maryland William C. Eppig Executive Secretary in Maryland

47 Isn t That a Cult? Answering parents questions about Masonic-sponsored Youth Every so often, a member of a Masonic-sponsored youth group will invite a friend to join and be told that they can t, because my parents say it s a cult. All Masonic-sponsored youth groups MUST have parental permission before a youth may join, so it s important to us that parents understand what we re about, and why we re most definitely NOT a cult. We hope the information in this article will be helpful to you in understanding Masonic-sponsored youth groups. Youth groups sponsored by Masons are not officially part of the Masonic fraternity. Membership in these groups does not imply or guarantee future membership in any other Masonic-related group. Groups receive financial sponsorship, use of a meeting location, and a variety of other help from local Masonic organizations, but the groups are ultimately independent, with their own local, state and national governing bodies. Why would someone think these groups are cults? We re not entirely sure. Unfamiliar groups with their own jargon and ways of doing things often seem strange. Different people probably have different reasons for reacting negatively to these unfamiliar practices. Some that we ve encountered are: Lack of firsthand knowledge about the groups Misinformation or misunderstanding of the groups Mistrust of fraternal organizations in general A negative experience with one of the groups and perhaps most commonly Just because someone else told them they are! What is a cult? That answer may depend on who you ask! Some argue that almost any group s way of thinking and behaving, however extreme, is simply a matter of personal belief. Some say that calling any group a cult is bigotry and intolerance. Other people are willing to define a cult as anyone who disagrees with my point of view. A more useful definition is probably somewhere in between these two extremes. Cults may be religious, social, philosophical, or political. Most experts agree that a cult is more than just a different set of beliefs. Any group with new or different ideas, especially with religious content, might be labeled a cult. The Romans considered the early Christian church to be a cult, labeled them as atheists, and accused them of horrible practices like cannibalism and infant sacrifice. Ridiculous? Of course, but the fact that Christianity was different from Roman belief automatically made it subject to suspicion. Many authorities have agreed that in order for a group to be a cult, it must have some very distinctive characteristics. These usually include excessive control over members (especially through isolating them from the outside world ) and the existence of an overly powerful charismatic leader. Groups with these characteristics often do terrible damage to members families, and are sometimes dangerous to participants. A few that we ve all seen in the news have become dangerous in the extreme, resulting in mass murders and/or suicides among their members. Cults exercise excessive control.

48 All organizations and religions seek to influence the action and thinking of their members, which can be a very good thing. In contrast, cults exercise excessive levels of control over their followers: They operate by separating members from outside relationships and influences. They may even shelter members from television and other media. They believe that only their particular group has access to truth. (Cult thinking is more rigid and exclusive than normal religious belief. Cult members believe that no one outside the group has the ability to understand real truth, or that only their leaders can correctly interpret truth.) They often view themselves as above the law of the land. They have a very Us vs. Them mentality, and foster a spirit of suspicion and paranoia towards outsiders in general. They are extremely intolerant of other views. They are destructive to relationships and families. There may be a we are your family now attitude. Worth and validation come only from the group. They utilize deceptive or misleading recruitment and retention techniques. They demand unquestioning loyalty. Activity outside the group may be forbidden. Cults have charismatic, domineering leaders. One of the most characteristic traits of a cult is the existence of a charismatic, domineering leader or group of leaders. Some cult leaders, like the infamous Charles Manson ( The Manson Family ), Reverend Jim Jones ( The People s Temple ), David Koresh ( The Branch Davidians ), and Marshall Applewhite ( Heaven s Gate ), have drawn public attention to the cult leader type. There are many more who have not been so widely publicized. But they all have some traits in common: They are control-freaks, and maintain rigid control of all aspects of their group. They generally rule by strength, fear and sometimes even violence. They may claim to be divine or to have a special or unique relationship with God. They may claim to have supernatural powers. They require unquestioning loyalty, obedience and dependence. They may demand the sharing or surrender of the members property or earnings. They are above the rules of the group. Members may have to live in poverty while the leader gets wealthy on their earnings; members may be admonished to chastity while the leader engages in a promiscuous lifestyle, and so on. It s not difficult to see how such a leader could be very dangerous indeed. So, are Masonic-sponsored youth groups cults? It won t surprise you to hear that we certainly don t think so. Why? Because Masonic-sponsored youth groups: Encourage members to be actively involved in their church, school, and community. (Cults trade on isolating their members from outside influences.) Place a tremendous emphasis on the importance of the family, and on your authority as a parent. (Cults claim authority for themselves, and try to replace or supplant a member s family.) Make no claims to a unique or exclusive knowledge of truth. Members profess belief in one God, are encouraged to pursue and grow in their own family s faith tradition. We teach religious tolerance and respect, which does not imply accepting or embracing the beliefs of others, but simply affirming their right to hold those beliefs. As a result, members hold a wide variety of differing beliefs, which are not dictated by the group. (Cults look inside the group for truth, not to outside groups.) Work cooperatively with other community groups toward common goals and worthwhile services. (Cults operate on an Us versus Them mentality, not a We and They together mentality.)

49 Emphasize service to others through giving of our time, our talents, and our financial resources. (Cults demand that service and investment of resources be for the benefit of the group and its leader, not for outsiders. ) Invite and encourage parents to be involved in all of their youth s activity with the group, whether as a guest, or even as a volunteer leader. (Cults practice deceit and hiding, not openness and welcoming.) Encourage independent thinking, initiative, and leadership. Good team members are co-leaders, not mindless followers. (Cults seek unquestioning obedience to a domineering leader, not fair, democratic, and cooperative leadership among their members.) And we could go on How are Masonic-sponsored youth groups unique? There are a number of things that set us apart. Our groups: Offer a program of leadership development based on high moral principles, and an emphasis on character development. Allow youth to develop and carry out their own program, and to learn by doing. Provide a varied program of activities in athletics, service, education, public speaking, and more. Give youth the chance to work with and learn from adult mentors and role models of all ages, backgrounds, and walks of life. Utilize solemn and serious ceremonies that emphasize their core values, and offer members opportunities to develop memorization and public speaking skills. Offer the values and fellowship of a close-knit organization, with absolutely no hazing or other negative behavior sometimes associated with other fraternities. Have a single-gender structure (separate groups for young men and young women), offering a unique learning environment rarely available to youth, while interaction among the groups allows application of the values taught in all life s relationships. We re certainly different. And we re proud of it. Sometimes being different" is good! What should we as parents do? The best answer to that is: Do what you think is best! We hope you ll take some time to visit with a local group, and talk with the members and adult volunteers involved. You may find you already know some of them from your neighborhood, school, church, and community. Ask questions, express your concerns, and see for yourself. If your child joins, you ll always be welcome to visit, and perhaps even become an advisor. If you belong to a church, synagogue or other religious community, you may wish to ask your leaders for their opinions of our organizations. You should certainly consider their opinions as you make your decision. Talk with some people you respect who belong to Masonic related groups. Ask why they became involved. Make the choice that is best for your child. We realize that Masonic-sponsored youth groups aren t for everyone. We will absolutely respect and abide by your decision. Your child will never be permitted to join or participate in activities without your permission. Before deciding about your child s involvement in a Masonic sponsored youth group, please take the time to get a good look at who we are and what we do. We think you ll like what you see!

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51 An Organization for Young Men MEMBERSHIP A P P L I C A T I O N (PETITION) 1. Name: 2. Date: 3. Address: 4. City: 5. State & Zip: 6. Phone: ( ) 7. Birthdate: School Attending: 10. Grade: 11. Favorite School Subject(s): 12. Hobbies/Interests: 13. Clubs, Organizations: 14. Church/Synagogue: 15. References: List 3 friends (your age) you have known for one year: Name: Address: Phone: Name: Address: Phone: Name: Address: Phone: My Parents/Guardians approve of my joining DeMolay. 16. Father s Name: 17. Mother s Name: 18. Is your father a Senior DeMolay? If so, where? 19. Is your father a Mason? If so, where? 20. Parent/Guardian Signature: 21. Applicant s Signature: 22. DeMolay Sponsor s Name and Signature: 22B. Second DeMolay Sponsor s Name and Signature: 23. Masonic Sponsor s Name and Signature: Your Life Membership Fee of: must accompany this application.

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53 State Sweetheart Program Occasionally a Chapter Sweetheart will decide to run for the office of State Sweetheart. This is a very large endeavor and should not be entered into lightly or without complete awareness of the responsibilities and commitments required. A lot more is expected of you you will be in the spotlight at all times and you will now become the big sister to all of the members in the state. You will be required to represent the Order at all functions that you attend. Much travel and time is involved. If you are considering running for State Sweetheart, please take a moment to review this section of the manual. It will give you a better idea of what all is expected. It is also recommended that you review this with your parents before making a final decision to run. If you have any questions regarding the State Sweetheart Program, do not hesitate to contact the State Sweetheart Coordinator.

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55 RULES AND QUALIFICATIONS FOR STATE SWEETHEART CANDIDATES 1. Each member Chapter which is in good standing with the Maryland State Association Chapters may submit up to two candidates for competition. 2. By her election as a Chapter Sweetheart, the current Chapter Sweetheart is automatically entitled to participate in this competition, If she is not eligible or does not wish to run, the members of the chapter may then offer her position to an eligible Past Chapter Sweetheart. 3. The second candidate position may also be offered to an eligible past Chapter Sweetheart, member of Job s Daughters or Rainbow Girls. 4. Any eligible past Chapter Sweetheart who wishes to run for State Sweetheart must receive a majority vote of approval to participate by the current chapter members of her chapter. 5. Each candidate must submit an application form along with the qualifications form (both included in the manual), to the State Sweetheart Coordinator. ALL APPLICATIONS MUST BE POSTMARKED NO LATER THAN THIRTY (30) DAYS PRIOR TO THE ANNUAL SWEETHEART BALL. 6. Qualifications: a. Candidates must be at least 16 years of age but not 21 on the day of the competition. b. Candidates do not have to be members of Job s Daughters or Rainbow Girls. c. Candidates must have the approval of their parents and Chapter Advisor. d. Candidates must have completed/passed the first part of the Leadership Correspondence Course (Basic DeMolay Knowledge) prior to the time of application. e. Candidates must be willing to actively travel the entire state as well as neighboring jurisdictions. f. Candidates cannot have previously been elected to the office of State Sweetheart of Maryland, or currently serving as the Sweetheart of another jurisdiction. g. Candidates cannot concurrently serve as the Grand Worthy Advisor, Grand Bethel Honored Queen, or Miss Job s Daughters when serving as State Sweetheart. h. Candidates cannot be married, engaged, or pregnant at the time of election or at any time during her term as State Sweetheart. 7. In the event that the State Sweetheart resigns, the Senior Miss (1 st runner up) shall automatically assume the title of State Sweetheart.

56 STATE SWEETHEART COMPETITION Personal Interviews (only when requested by the State Sweetheart Coordinator or EO) In the case there are more than five candidates running for State Sweetheart, each candidate will have a personal interview with judges on an individual basis. This will consist of answering questions and talking about yourself. Dress should be casual nice. Interviews will be conducted in a relaxed atmosphere judged by a panel of not less than three and not more than five judges selected by the State Sweetheart Coordinator. These judges will select the five finalists. Miss Congeniality(only when requested by the State Sweetheart Coordinator or EO) Prior to the State Sweetheart Competition, those Chapter Sweethearts in attendance, the current State Sweetheart, current Senior Miss, Junior Miss and Miss Congeniality will gather in a private room. At that time each of those present will have one vote to elect the next Miss Congeniality. Each vote is by secret ballot and the name with the largest vote count will win. The votes will be collected by the State Sweetheart Coordinator and counted by her and one other adult. The new Miss Congeniality will be announced prior to the announcement of the new State Sweetheart at the Annual Sweetheart Ball. Formal Competition 1. Each candidate will be escorted to the stage individually to answer a question given to all candidates the day before. Candidates will wear short dresses. 2. Each candidate will have a costume depicting her personality. She will be presented on stage to explain why she chose the costume and how it represents her personality. 3. Finally each candidate will be presented one last time on stage. She will be asked one final question which shall NOT be known in advance. 4. For each category of competition, each DeMolay in attendance will receive a form (3 total) with each candidates name listed. Next to the candidates name, each DeMolay will score the Sweetheart from 1 (lowest) to 5 (highest) based on how he felt the Sweetheart represented herself. 5. Following each category the forms will be collected, given to the State Sweetheart Coordinator, who will add the totals of each form, with the assistance of one other person. 6. The candidate with the highest overall total will be elected as the new Maryland DeMolay State Sweetheart. Second highest Senior Miss, third highest Junior Miss. 7. The new State Sweetheart will be crowned at the Annual Sweetheart Ball.

57 Maryland Order of DeMolay State Sweetheart Candidate Qualification and Application Form Name: Address: Telephone: Chapter: City/Zip: Birth Date: School: Grade Level: GPA Qualifications: 1. Must be between the ages of 16 and 21 years of age on date of competition. 2. Must have approval of parents and Chapter Advisor. 3. Must be willing and able to travel. 4. Must submit application at least 30 days prior to the first day of Conclave 5. Cannot have been previously elected to the office of State Sweetheart 6. Must complete/pass Leadership Correspondence Course (LCC) #1 7. Must agree to all other qualifications listed on qualification page. I have read and understand the qualifications for State Sweetheart and will abide by them. If I am elected, I will accept and perform all responsibilities of State Sweetheart. Candidate Signature Date Parent/Guardian Consent: I agree to my daughter running for the position of Maryland State Sweetheart, with the understanding that if elected, it will involve active participation including travel to chapter, state, and neighboring jurisdictions for activities and conventions. I understand that occasionally participation in these activities will require overnight stays with other Sweethearts, where, if I am not available to attend, adequate/appropriate chaperones will be provided. I understand and have reviewed with my daughter the responsibilities and commitments involved with serving in this capacity. With this understanding, I consent to my daughter running for State Sweetheart, and it elected, I will support and encourage her in this endeavor. Parent/Guardian Signature Date Chapter Consent: Chapter Advisor Signature Date