With Friends Like These, Who... Or, Providing Good Counsel to Those in Need INTRODUCTION

Transcription

1 With Friends Like These, Who... Or, Providing Good Counsel to Those in Need Background Passage The Book of Job, Chapters 3-13 Selected Lesson Passages from Job 3, 4, 8, 9, 11, and 13 Lesson for June 8-9, 2013 Dr. James Patterson INTRODUCTION Paul was very upset and was soliciting advice from one of his buddies. She just doesn t get it! I m the man in this family, and if I want to go out drinking with my friends, then Sarah is just going to have to get used to the idea. This had been an ongoing discussion between Paul and Sarah for over two years. His friend, Curtis, replied. You don t have to put up with that, man. She s being unreasonable. You re not the kind to be whupped by an uncompromising, demanding wife. I m wondering if it s about time end this thing. What do you think, Curt? Without a moment s hesitation, Curtis responded, Just do it, Paul. None of us like Sarah, anyway. We hate to even come around, because we know she is going to resent our having a good time, and will start griping about how you should spend more time with the kids. Just divorce her. You don t need that aggravation. If Curtis knew (or cared) anything about the Biblical view and expectations of a marriage, he would never have advised his friend to push for divorce. How many bad situations have been made so much worse by bad advice? How often is bad advice given? Today we continue the saga of Job, covering some of the key issues from chapters 3 through 14. It is very interesting how many people are interested in the story of Job and how many people identify with him to one degree or another. Perhaps many of us can recall times when a loved one went through a very bad spell. Perhaps we can recall offering advice. Perhaps, at times, the advice we gave was not godly, nor grounded in Scripture.

2 In today s passages, Job is seeking understanding. He can make no sense of his current situation and is listening to the collective wisdom of his closest friends. Will they compassionately support him and provide genuine Godly advice, or will they abrasively further their own agendas or take a holier than thou attitude with Job? Unfortunately, we don t reach a happy ending to this story by chapter 14. We are going to move the story along today, but satisfaction will have to come from a future lesson. Summary of Prior Chapters (Job 1-2) As we learned last week, Job was a prosperous farmer living in the land of Uz. He had thousands of sheep, camels, and other livestock, a large family, and many servants. God described Job as a man of perfect integrity, who feared God and turned away from evil. But then, Satan the Accuser came before God claiming that Job was faithful to God only because he was wealthy and everything was going well for him. According to Satan, anyone would trust in a God who was prospering him, but if that prosperity went away, so also would go the faith. In effect, Satan was saying, You are not a God worthy of worship. You have to pay people to honor you. And so the testing of Job s faith began. Therefore, the fundamental reason for Job s suffering was to silence the blasphemous accusations of Satan and prove that a man could honor God, even though he had lost everything. Job s life became a spiritual battlefield. The hosts of Heaven and Hell watched to see how Job would respond. In a single day, Satan was allowed to destroy all 10 of Job s children, plus his servants, livestock, herdsmen, and home. But Job continued to trust in God, saying, The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord. (1:21) Not one to give up easily, Satan challenged God again. Let me touch his body and take away his health, and You will soon hear him curse You to Your face. God allowed Satan to attack Job physically. Satan covered Job with painful sores--red, oozing, swollen lumps under his skin, probably ranging in size from the size of a pea to the size of a golf ball. Satan threw in insomnia, nightmares, and blackened skin for good measure. Job took up residence at the city dump, sitting on a pile of ashes, scratching himself with a piece of broken pottery. In total despair, Job s wife advised him to curse God and die (2:9), and that was exactly what Satan wanted him to do.

3 Job could not understand what was going on, but it was important that he not understand. Had Job known that God was using him as a weapon to defeat Satan, he could have simply sat back and waited trustfully for the battle to end, but the victory that God wanted could not come with Job having inside information. Before we move on, though, we shouldn t be too hard on Job s wife. Though not the focal point of this story, she, too, had just lost 10 children in a day, along with her material wealth. Now, her husband was wasting away in pain and shame. She may have thought that if he cursed God, God would just strike him dead and get it over with. Three of Job s friends came to be with him during these hard times. On the plus side, they traveled some distance from other towns, and they stayed with him in the dumping grounds, rather than getting a room somewhere. And taking the cue from Job, they remained silent for an entire week. As it turns out, these seven days of silence would be the only real help these friends would provide. Eventually, they began to hypothesize and advise. These monologues form the basis for today s lesson. LESSON PASSAGE 1 Job 3 (selected verses) It would be better if I had never been born. I curse the night I was conceived. What s the point of life when it doesn t make sense? Finally, Job broke the silence. These sentences demonstrate the depth of Job s agony and despair. After losing his children and everything he owned, he erupted in a spasm of grief. These losses had taken quite a toll on his emotions. As far as a timeline goes, in 7:3, he mentioned, I have been allotted months of futility. He wished he had never been born. He cursed the night he was conceived. In fact, he said that anyone who is good at cursing should curse the night he was conceived. He bitterly complained about the senseless nature of life. Was Job sinning in his despair? No. Even the Lord asked, Father why hast Thou forsaken Me? Even Jesus wept.

4 LESSON PASSAGE 2 Friend #1: Eliphaz (Chapters 4:3; 4:6 7) 4:3 Indeed, you have instructed many and have strengthened weak hands. 4:6 Isn t your piety your confidence, and the integrity of your life your hope? 4:7 Consider: who has perished when he was innocent? Where have the honest been destroyed? Verse 4:3 Once Job broke the silence, the three friends felt that it was now their turn to weigh in on the situation. So, one at a time, from the oldest to the youngest, they begin to advise Job. Friend #1, Eliphaz, started off well. Unfortunately, by the end of his speech, this sentiment had become, you can dish it out (advice), Job, but you can t take it. 4:6-7 According to Eliphaz, if you are living a Godly life, you have nothing to fear, because God ALWAYS blesses the righteous and strikes down the wicked. To Eliphaz, this was the way God operated in His dealings with human beings. A just God would never allow a blameless person to suffer as Job had suffered. Eliphaz based his wisdom on two things: a frightening personal experience he had one night and his own observations of life (Read Job 4:12-16). Does this nightmare experience he described seem to fit God s pattern for revealing truth? As far as his observations go, he says he has seen sinners prosper only to be destroyed and to lose everything. He is applying this generalization to Job. Is he claiming too much insight? Can he accurately judge Job s heart? Eliphaz hoped that Job would admit his guilt and appeal to God for mercy and correction. Surely, the God who crushed the sinner would also restore a repentant, righteous man (see Job 5:8-1, 17-18). However, there are flaws in Eliphaz logic. When he asked if an innocent person had ever met tragedy, a thousand martyrs could have answered with a resounding yes. Also, Jesus Christ was innocent but crucified, proving that Eliphaz absolutes were actually situational. For his part, Job was not aware of any sin he had committed. Although he was hurt by his friend s words, he remained open to (what he hoped would be) wise instruction.

5 LESSON PASSAGE 3 Friend #2: Bildad (Chapters 8:4-8, 20) 8:4 Since your children sinned against Him, He gave them over to their rebellion. 8:5 But if you earnestly seek God and ask the Almighty for mercy, 8:6 if you are pure and upright, then He will move even now on your behalf and restore the home where your righteousness dwells. 8:7 Then, even if your beginnings were modest, your final days will be full of prosperity. 8:8 For ask the previous generation, and pay attention to what their fathers discovered, 8:20 There s no way that God will reject a good person, and there is no way He ll help a bad one. Friend #2, Bildad, was a legalist. He could quote ancient proverbs and had great respect for tradition. Like Eliphaz, he viewed all human suffering through the perspective of cause and effect. Verse 8:4 It was a particularly low blow to claim that all of Job s children died because they were sinners. One begins to detect a certain lack of sensitivity on Bildad s part. Certainly the Scriptures say nothing of the children s sins. In fact, Job 1:5 mentions that Job regularly offered purification sacrifices on behalf of his children in the event that they might have sinned. Verses 8:5-6 According to Bildad, if Job s children got what they deserved, then Job was also receiving just punishment. However, since Job was still alive (unlike the children), he still had the opportunity to plead to God for mercy. And, if Job was as pure and upright as he claimed to be, he could count on God to take action to restore his circumstances. Verse 8:7 For thinkers like Bildad, material prosperity is a sign of God s pleasure, while poverty signifies Divine displeasure. Job had lost everything, but Bildad asserted that if Job would just admit to his sins and ask for forgiveness, he could experience a return to a comfortable living in his final years. Bildad was correct that God is just, but that is not the total of God. God is also love, mercy, and forgiveness. Verse 8:8: Bildad placed great confidence in conventional wisdom. The cause and effect philosophy had been espoused by earlier generations, thus proving its validity. Like Eliphaz, Bildad liked to quote the ancients. However, the fact that something was said a long time ago is no guarantee that it is right. Verse 8:20: What Bildad is saying is that bad things happen to bad people. If you pull up a plant, it dies. And nobody pulls up a good plant only weeds.

6 Therefore, Job must be a weed. Suffering was the result of sin, and that was the end of the story. But, God would restore Job s fortunes if only he would repent. This is exactly what the devil was hoping for that Job would scheme up a sham repentance to get back on God s good side. LESSON PASSAGE 4 Friend #3: Zophar (Chapters 11 14) 11:6b But you can be sure of this, you haven t gotten half of what you deserve. 11:11-12 Surely He (God) knows which people are worthless. If He sees iniquity, will He not take note of it? 12 But a stupid man will gain understanding as soon as a wild donkey is born a man! 11:13 As for you, if you redirect your heart and lift up your hands to Him in prayer 14 if there is iniquity in your hand, remove it, and don t allow injustice to dwell in your tents 15 then you will hold your head high, free from fault. You will be firmly established and unafraid. Verse 11:6b Zophar was friend #3. He was most likely the youngest; certainly, he was the harshest. His opening statement could be summed up this way: Cheer up, Job. You would be suffering even more if God gave you what you really deserved. It could be worse. This was absolutely no comfort to a man who had just lost his children, his wealth and was barely hanging on to his life. Verses 11:11-15: Zophar s arguments center around 4 principles: 1. Job was guilty. He called Job a windbag, full of lies and mockery and assumed he had some hidden sin in his life that was responsible for his anguish. 2. Job was ignorant. I, Zophar, understand God and can teach you Job, if you ll just listen. 3. Job is stubborn. If Job would only repent, his confusion would disappear, but Zophar felt Job was just too stubborn or perhaps too proud of his integrity to repent. 4. Job s suffering could only be the result of Divine punishment for deep and serious sin.

7 Once again, a friend was tempting Job to bargain with God to get out of trouble. Satan accused that Job had a prosperity faith that received good things in return for obedience. If Job had taken Zophar s advice and asked forgiveness for some imaginary sin, he would have played into Satan s hand. Bottom line: Why were the three friends so angry? It could be they were afraid that the same unexpected calamities could happen to them. Therefore, they needed to prove that bad things only happened to bad people, and as long as they remained good, they would be safe. However, by maintaining his innocence, Job undermined the theory of his friends and robbed them of their peace and confidence. LESSON PASSAGE 5 Job s Response to the Friends 13:2 Everything you know, I also know; I am not inferior to you. 13:4 But you coat the truth with lies; you are all worthless doctors. 13:5 If only you would shut up and let that be your wisdom! 13:3 Yet I prefer to speak to the Almighty and argue my case before God. 9:33 How I wish we had an arbitrator to step in and let me get on with life-- To break God s death grip on me, to free me from this terror so I could breathe again. 13:15a: Though He slay me, yet will I trust in Him. Verses 13:2, 4-5 Job pointed out the ineffectiveness of his friends ministry to him. He rejected their relentless accusations, along with their condescending air of superiority. Job was not going to make up some sins in his life just so he could repent of them and earn the blessing of God. Verses 13:3, 9:33 Job affirmed his integrity. However, he did blame God for his misfortune. If he could take God to a court of law, he would. But how does one present his case against God? If only he had a mediator. Job would be pleased to know that a mediator was coming. Jesus Christ will fill that need for Job and for the billions of others who came later. Verse 13:15a Game, set, and match. Though the saga continues for several more chapters, Job will remain faithful to his God a great statement of faith!

8 LIFE APPLICATION: How will we apply the lessons learned in today s passages? As Christians, we must be careful when it comes to advising people who are suffering. We re often tempted to jump right in with unfounded explanations that can cause additional hurt or confusion to the one we re trying to help. After seeing the poor example of counseling performed by Job s friends, how should we comfort someone who is suffering? How would you like to be comforted? First of all, when counseling others, pray to the Lord in advance that you will be a conduit for His wisdom and that the only words you say will be God-directed. Don t let the awkwardness of the situation keep you away. It s not comfortable to be around someone who has experienced a tragic loss, but this is when they need you the most. We can at least give Job s friends credit for showing up. Don t try to explain why things are happening. We have a natural tendency to try to make sense of things, but not everything has a simple explanation. Because of our limited observations, how can we hope to get to the bottom of an issue in a few minutes time let alone determine who has sin or righteousness in their hearts? Isn t there Scripture that warns against our even trying to judge another s heart or intentions? Sometimes suffering is the result of divine judgment on sin, but not always. Sometimes the purpose of suffering is to produce spiritual growth. Hardship may also be due to satanic efforts to destroy one of God s people, or it could simply be a result of natural catastrophe. Sometimes, no answer can be determined. We can know, however, that God will not allow us to suffer one moment beyond His purpose in a particular trial in our lives. When counseling, sensitivity, not self-righteousness, is what is needed. You don t heal a broken heart with logic; you heal a broken heart with love. Believing we are right does not give us license to be cruel. Yes, we must speak the truth, but we must speak the truth in love (Eph. 4:15). Be aware. People who are hurting may say rash or hurtful things. They need grace at such a time. The three friends above were often responding to Job s words, not the pain in his heart. Our words, if not carefully chosen, can hurt those who are already broken and could possibly add to their burdens. When we are the ones suffering:

9 At times of severe testing, we should consider not only HOW we can get out of this situation, but also WHAT can we get out of it. Remember, Romans 8:28: And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Heavenly Father: CLOSING PRAYER: Lord, help us to be wise counselors to our friends in need. When offering advice, let us never stray from Biblical wisdom and truth. Help us to be sensitive to the suffering of others and to remain non-judgmental. In the name of Jesus Christ, we pray. Amen.