All of these are part of an amazing phenomenon known as the Social Cure.

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1 I Don t Need Church Rich Nathan May 15, 2011 Myths: Myths That Christians Believe Series Romans 12:1-16 What does the performance of African American calculus students at the University of California at Berkeley have in common with the overthrow of the Serbian dictator Slobodan Milosevic, the reduction of teen smoking rates in tobacco-friendly South Carolina, and the cure for tuberculosis around the globe? How are these things linked - calculus performance, teen smoking rates, the overthrow of dictators, and the cure for tuberculosis? All of these are part of an amazing phenomenon known as the Social Cure. An amazing phenomenon: The Social Cure All of these seemingly unrelated items were tied together in a wonderful new book by Tina Rosenberg titled Join the Club: How Peer Pressure Can Transform the World. The question that Tina Rosenberg deals with in her book is how do you get people to change? How do you get people to live more healthy lives, to diet, to quit smoking, to not drink excessively? How do you get unjust systems to change school systems, or businesses, or governments? How do you get people to change in a positive direction? What Tina Rosenberg discovered is that people don t change simply by getting more information. Almost everyone on Planet Earth, who smokes, knows that smoking is bad for their health, but they continue to smoke anyway. People who are living under an oppressive government know the government is oppressive. They don t need more information about how unjust the government is. So how do you persuade people to act in their own long-term self-interest to not get divorced, to break free of pornography use, to quit smoking, to overthrow a government when short-term steps for change seem more painful than they re worth? Again, people don t change by being lectured at. Nor do most people change by being made to feel guilty. Nor to people change simply by getting information about what they already know. What the book Join the Club argues is that people change through peer pressure. Few things in life are more important in determining the kind of people we are than peer pressure, the group we hang around with, the behaviors that that group determines is appropriate or cool or desirable peer pressure Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 1

2 Now, we all know about peer pressure, if we ve ever been teenagers. Why we do something or don t do something is massively shaped by the group we choose to identify with. In fact, one book on parenting suggested that second only to our gift of our DNA, our gift of our genes to our children, the second most important thing that a parent could do in raising a child is helping that child to pick the right peer group. All the other stuff that we do as parents disciplining, nurturing, loving, caring there is a substantial argument that these things pale next to assisting your child to pick the right friends. Peer pressure. It is why virtually every teenager who chooses to smoke begins to smoke. I look at my own life. I began smoking cigarettes at the beginning of the 11 th grade in high school because I dated a girl, who smoked, and all of the friends we hung around with smoked. I was the only one who didn t smoke and so I said to her one day, Hey, let me try one of those. Now, anyone who has ever begun smoking knows that your first few cigarettes are disgusting. They make you sick. Your body is screaming to you, Don t do this! You are poisoning yourself! You have to push through that and you do it with peer support. The reason I stopped smoking was because after I became a follower of Jesus at age 18 I was immediately surrounded by a new group of peers, this time Christians, none of whom smoked. They never told me that smoking was bad. But over a couple of months of hanging around with these new friends and being the only one who was smoking, I quickly realized that the new norm for being part of this group was not smoking. Monkey see, monkey do. That s how we function. And what works with kids also is true for adults. Whether we are talking about losing weight, getting exercise, or following doctor s orders, or university education or criminal justice, or economic development in a poor country, social support and peer pressure have been discovered to be the way that people change. Let me go back to the original example. I mentioned African American calculus students at University of California at Berkeley. Here was the problem. Once universities around the country began integrating in the 1960 s most universities discovered that there was a major achievement gap between the performance of black and Hispanic students taking freshmen calculus and the performance of Asian and Jewish students. The average grade for Hispanic students taking calculus at University of California at Berkeley in the late 1960 s was D+. A Jewish graduate student at University of California at Berkeley began to look into why the African American students weren t performing in calculus as the Asian students. And he wrote to the math instructors at Berkeley and they had a number of theories regarding why there was this gap in achievement. Some of the theories were racial. Well, you know, certain minority groups are just not good at math. Or You know, these kids are not as motivated as the Asian and 2010 Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 2

3 Jewish kids who come to school super motivated to study. Or You know the kids come from poorer high schools and they aren t really prepared for college math. Or The kids come from deprived backgrounds. Their parents weren t college educated like the Jewish and Asian kids parents. But as this grad student began studying the problem, he quickly realized that all these theories were baloney. Many of the kids were super motivated. They were valedictorians in their high school classes. And many of them had performed extremely well on their math Standard Achievement Tests which was supposed to be a great predictor for future success. Many of them had parents who were college educated. Certainly they had parents who urged them from the time they were little to plan for college. So what accounted for the gap? Well, this Jewish grad student decided to move into the dormitories and he began watching the way that the Asian students studied and the way that the African American students studied. Do you know what he discovered? The Asian students studied in a group; the African American students almost entirely studied alone. Now the group approach by the Asian students had a number of advantages. The students helped each other develop strategies for solving problems. The groups enabled students to ask questions of each other. The black students had no one to ask. The groups provided the Asian students with the opportunity to find out where they were compared to a larger group. They quickly learned that if no one in the group understood a problem, their lack of understanding wasn t because they were stupid, it was because the problem was impossible. But when an African American student came upon a problem that they didn t understand, they assumed that they were just bad in math. The Asian student group shared homework, test taking strategies, how to approach the professor. They talked about what their sisters, or cousins, or friends found out about the course. There was all this sharing going on and all of this support and encouragement. And in the course of all of this support the Asian students actually studied longer. So this grad student from New York decided to form African American study groups. Do you know what happened? The African American students at Berkeley began to perform at exactly the same level as the Asian and Jewish students. The average grade moved from a D+ to B+. Social support. Peer pressure. Tina Rosenberg calls it the social cure. You say, What does any of this have to do with being a follower of Christ or why I came to church today? 2010 Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 3

4 A few weeks ago I started a series that I titled Myths that Christians Believe. Throughout the series we re going to be covering such myths as: Only men can be pastors God wants me to be happy, healthy and wealthy To be a Christian means never to judge The formula that I gave you a few weeks ago was this: A sincere Christian + a false belief = a derailed (or disillusioned) Christian Now there are few false beliefs have derailed more Christians than this one: I don t need church I m a Christian. I get along just fine with me and God. I don t need church to do life well, or to follow Christ. I m going to talk about that myth today in a message that I ve titled I Don t Need Church. Let s pray. More and more people in America today say that they believe in the basic doctrines of Christianity, that they believe that Jesus died for their sins, he is the Savior. They believe that he rose from the dead. Huge percentages of Americans believe that God created the world. They believe that Christ will return. But they say, Even though I believe, I do not belong to any church. And I really don t see why I should be part of a church. Me and God get alone fine. A growing epidemic: Unchurched Christians Typically, people who believe, but are not part of a church bolster their noninvolvement in church with a number of reasons, excuses, and justifications. Look, my kids are in sports and those are in full swing. Sunday morning is really our only time to relax, or sleep in, or do chores around the house. We ve got so much going on, church is not a huge priority. Or Even if I had time for church, and Vineyard schedules church on Saturday night; if you re young you can go Sunday night. But even if folks have the time to take an hour and a half to go to church, many folks say they don t want to go. The church is full of hypocrites. Who wants to hang out with people who say one thing and do something entirely different during the week? 2010 Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 4

5 Many folks object to church because the church doesn t meet their standard, their ideal of what church ought to be like. You know, the worship isn t Spirit-led enough. Or it is too loud, or too soft, or I don t like the style. Or the sermon is too intellectual, or not intellectual enough. I don t like the people. I don t like the building. The children s ministry didn t meet my standards. The coffee didn t taste good. These folks spent too much money on their building; or not enough money on the building. There are too many people at the church; there are too few people. One of the best responses that I ever read to this objection to church because it doesn t meet my standard, whatever that standard is in worship, or teaching, or facilities, or program, was written by a man named Dietrich Bonhoeffer in a wonderful book titled Life Together. Here is what Bonhoeffer wrote: Innumerable times a whole Christian community has broken down because it had sprung from a wish dream. The serious Christian, set down for the first time in a Christian community, is likely to bring with him a very definite idea of what Christian life together should be and to try to realize it. But God s grace speedily shatters such dreams. Just as surely as God desires to lead us to a knowledge of genuine Christian fellowship, so surely must we be overwhelmed by a great disillusionment with others, with Christians in general, and, if we are fortunate, with ourselves. By sheer grace, God will not permit us to live for even a brief period in a dream world only that church which faces such disillusionment, with all its unhappy and ugly aspects, begins to be what it should be in God s sight, begins to grasp in faith the promise that is given to it every human wish dream [each of our ideals] that is injected into the Christian community is a hindrance to genuine community and must be banished if genuine community is to survive. He who loves his dream of a church more than the Christian church itself becomes a destroyer of the church. God hates wish dreams; they make the dreamer proud and pretentious. See, the problem with rejecting church because it doesn t meet our ideal, or rejecting a church because the worship doesn t meet our standard, or the building doesn t, or a particular program doesn t, or the teaching is too this or too that is that we are setting ourselves up as judges instead of coming alongside the church with an attitude of humility hey, who am I? It s just my opinion. We stand over and above the church believing we have the ability to critique everything. And in that place we become destroyers of the possibility of real love and real fellowship occurring in the church. Let me respond more directly to this objection why do you need church? You can get all the Christian content you need from websites and podcasts and 2010 Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 5

6 books, from TV and radio. Attending a church and getting involved just makes our lives more hectic and crazy than they already are. Why do you need church? Turn with me to Romans 12: 1 16: Romans 12: Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God this is true worship. 2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God s will is his good, pleasing and perfect will. 3 For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. 4 For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, 5 so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. 6 We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; 7 if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; 8 if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully. 9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. 10 Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. 11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. 12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. 13 Share with the Lord s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not think you are superior. This last verse responds to the objection that church won t meet my needs. In this text the Apostle Paul is talking about how you and I change; how do we become better than we are; different than we are; break destructive habits, and work in our own long-term self interest - especially when, in the short-term, the change seems so painful. To make it really practical, how do you heal after you ve lost someone you love? How do you grieve in a healthy way? How do you break a habit that is going to destroy you or destroy your marriage a habit like pornography, or visiting chat rooms, or visiting prostitutes? How do you stop doing that? How do you fix your finances, or meet your material needs, or the material needs of your family when you don t have the resources on your own to fix your financial situation? 2010 Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 6

7 Romans 12 deals with the issue of how people change. And so the Apostle Paul writes in Romans 12:1: Romans 12:1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God this is true worship. Literally, mercy here is in the plural. In view of God s mercies. For 11 chapters the Apostle Paul has unfolded the various mercies of God. He has told us in the book of Romans about God s mercy to undeserving sinners. God s mercy in giving his Son to die for us; his mercy in declaring us just and right in his sight through faith in Christ; his mercy in giving us the gift of his Spirit; his mercy in adopting us as his children; and, his mercy in enfolding us in his people. In fact, if I had the time, I would show you that one of the key words in Romans 9-11 is the word mercy. Here are a couple of examples. Look at this: Romans 9:16 It does not, therefore, depend on human desire or effort, but on God s mercy. Romans 9:23 What if he did this to make the riches of his glory known to the objects of his mercy, whom he prepared in advance for glory All change in our lives in a positive direction, everything that God wants you to do in bringing health and blessing to your life and to those around you is built on a foundation of God s mercy. That s where we start. That s where Paul starts with the mercies of God. And so, how do we change? Paul says building upon the mercies of God: All change involves our bodies Romans 12:1 Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God this is true worship. If you want to change anything in your life start with your body. Every morning I begin my devotions by picturing myself as a sacrifice on an altar to God. I give back to my Creator, the one who formed me and made me, my ears for the day and what I listen to; my eyes and what I allow myself to look at; my mouth and what I allow to come out of mouth; my hands and I am going to do; my feet and 2010 Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 7

8 where I am going to go my whole body. I present my body to God and make it available for his use. Do you know Christianity is the most bodily of all the world s religions? No religion in the world focuses as much upon your body and what you do with your body as Christianity. You cannot be a follower of Christ and not bring your body under Christ s control. Again, Christianity is the most bodily of the world s religions. Unlike Islam and Judaism, we followers of Christ believe that God came to earth in a human body. He revealed himself in Jesus of Nazareth. And unlike Hindus and Buddhists, we believe that we are going to spend eternity in resurrected bodies. We are not going to be forever pure spirits. We are going to be forever embodied. I heard the great New Testament scholar, Tom Wright, once say that the early church was known in the world for two things. 1) They didn t sleep around. Unlike the rest of the Romans only Christians didn t sleep around. They only had sex within marriage. And 2) They believed in the resurrection of the dead. Both of these things involve the body. I often think that my altar call, when I call people to Christ, what I ought to do is invite people to come forward and give their bodies to Christ not just your heart and your spirit. You want to make this following of Christ really practical? Give Christ your body. And then Paul goes on and he says: All change involves our thoughts Romans 12:2 Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God s will is his good, pleasing and perfect will. But how exactly do we conform out thoughts to the will of God? How do you not become dominated by lustful thoughts, or anxious thoughts, or judgmental thoughts, or angry thoughts, or guilty thoughts thoughts of hurt or grief, or selfcondemnation? How do you get your thoughts in line with the thoughts that God wants you to fill your mind with? Again, we all know that we need to change in dozens of ways and maybe in one big way for you. You know you need to change. What s the point of being a Christian if you aren t changing? If you are not becoming more loving; and if you aren t becoming more kind - if you are not more concerned about the poor, or more welcoming to people who are different than you; if you re not becoming more generous; if you re not getting freed up from addictive patters? What s the point? Or better yet- how? How do you change? 2010 Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 8

9 In Romans 12: 3-16 the Apostle Paul says All change involves the church The goal in this chapter is teaching us the secret of personal transformation. And 2000 years before Tina Rosenberg wrote the book Join the Club and discovered what she calls the social cure, the Apostle Paul in Romans 12 tells us that you are not going to change, that you are never going to become the person God intends you to be, you are never going to become the person you want to be without the church. Romans 12: 3-16 destroys the myth that Christianity is just a private and personal matter just me and God. To be a Christian is to be part of something bigger than yourself. Look at this with me. Romans 12: For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. 4 For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, 5 so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. Now, in Romans 12:3 the Apostle Paul says Romans 12:3 For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. that we should measure ourselves in accordance with the faith that God has distributed to each of you. More literally: In accordance to the measure of faith God has given to each of you. Paul is talking about the means of change. So he says the way we change is by having a Common starting point We all start in the same place, by having a common standard for where we are. The common standard is the measure of faith that God has given you. What does that mean? 2010 Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 9

10 Well, there are two possible interpretations of this measure of faith. One is that God has given to each of us a different amount of faith and you look at yourself and say, Well, I have a very weak faith, so I shouldn t think so much of myself. Someone else says, I ve got a really strong faith; I can believe for big things, so I should think of myself really highly. I don t think that is what Paul meant here by evaluating yourself based on the measure of faith God has given. Paul is talking about the standard by which we measure ourselves. The standard by which all Christians should measure themselves is exactly the same saving faith in Jesus Christ who was crucified for our sins, who rose from the dead, and who declares us right in his sight. How do you evaluate yourself? I am a person who is in the right before God; I am God s beloved son; I am God s workmanship; I am God s great masterpiece through my faith in Jesus Christ, who died for me and rose again. Who are you? What s your starting point for change? You are right in God s sight. You are God s beloved daughter, God s beloved son; you are God s workmanship; you are God s masterpiece through your faith in Jesus Christ, who died for you and rose again. Based on that we change through our Common membership Romans 12:4-5 4 For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, 5 so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. The Apostle Paul says that when you come to Christ you become a member of his body. Now, being a member of Christ s body is different than being a member of a club, or being the member of a team. If you are a member of a country club, a buying club, or a team like a soccer team or swim team, you can quit the club or team and still survive pretty well. You can do life fine without the club or team. But if you are a member of a body; you re a finger, or an eye, or a heart or a kidney, your survival is tied to being connected to the body. Without the flow of life from the blood vessels and nerve endings and hormones of the body, you will shrivel up and die. Why do you need church? Because whether you realized it or not, friend, if you have given your life to Christ, you joined something bigger than yourself. You became a member of Christ s body. And your survival, the possibility of change for you is tied up with your participation with Christ s body Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 10

11 So Paul, in Romans 12:6 and following, begins to talk about the body and how the church body offers us a social cure for whatever it is that we need; however we need to change; however we need to be helped. We re not just helped by me and Jesus doing our thing together. It s Jesus working through his body that begins to cure and heal whatever is broken in me. Look at this with me. The Apostle Paul begins in Romans 12:6 talking about spiritual gifts. Romans 12:6 We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; The Greek word for gifts is charismata Charismata There is no such thing as a non-charismatic church. You can t be a church without having spiritual gifts. All Christian churches are charismatic even if they reject that label, even if they teach against the charismatic gifts, God gives the gifts anyway. And the gifts in the operation of the body meet our needs. Common needs Let s just tackle a few needs. Why do you need the church? In Romans 12:7 Paul talks about the gift of teaching. Romans 12:7 if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach; Without the church where will you go for teaching? Everyone of us left to ourselves will get off track; will veer away from God; will veer away from truth. We need to be taught and instructed. And we need to hear things that stretch us and challenge us; and confront us and make us squirm and uncomfortable. You know the beauty of listening to preaching is that you don t get to pick what the preacher says. Let me put it this way. By the grace of God, I get lots and lots of positive feedback regarding my teachings. But occasionally I will get a really critical saying that something that I said or something that one of the other pastors preached on, bothered an individual. They didn t like the viewpoint regarding a theological matter, or a political matter, such as a racial diversity, or poverty, or immigration, or war and peace. They didn t like it. They didn t like it so much that they re leaving the church Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 11

12 Now that person doesn t really understand what church is or what preaching is. The person is viewing Christian preaching like cable television (TV). I ve got 400 channels and I can listen to only those opinions that I already agree with. If I don t like one of the opinions, I just switch to a station that I do agree with. But friend, if you aren t regularly challenged by preaching; if you re not regularly stretched; if you re not being pushed; if you re not occasionally made uncomfortable; if you don t sometimes shake your head; if you don t feel prodded, nagged, cajoled, comforted, encouraged, exhorted; if there is no emotional wrestling or healing; if its all yeah, yeah, yeah I agree, I agree, I agree, I always agree then something is desperately wrong because the teaching is not changing you. And at that point I would find a church where the teaching challenges, stretches and changes you. Without church, not only where will you go for teaching, but Without church where will you go for encouragement? Look at Romans 12:8: Romans 12:8 if it is to encourage, then give encouragement; if it is giving, then give generously; if it is to lead, do it diligently; if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully. The world constantly tears us down. You may be a person who is torn down by your extended family. You may be torn down by your in-laws. You may be torn down by a critical spouse, or a critical mother or father. You feel torn down by co-workers; or maybe torn down by your boss. Torn down by your inability to achieve what you really want to achieve. Without church where do you go to get built up? To get strengthened? See, it is in the context of Christian church that there are other folks saying, You can do it. When I was younger I used to do a lot of heavy bench presses. It was heavy for me; I m not that big. But at one point I was lifting well over 300 pounds on the bench. There would be times when I would be pushing that weight and it was just too heavy for me. I couldn t lift it. And having a friend just standing behind me, not touching the bar, but yelling encouragement, you can do it, lift lift a little bit more, and pretending to lift with me was amazing. I found I could do it. Some of you are feeling tremendous weight now in your marriages. You feel like it is about to collapse and you can t do it. You can t push that weight any more. What do you need when you feel like you can t lift your marriage up? You need 2010 Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 12

13 the church. What do you need when you feel like quitting? It says in Romans 12:11: Romans 12:11 Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Literally, Romans 12:11 reads: Keep your spiritual fire burning How do you stay hot for God not just for an hour, a day or a week, but for 50 years, through cancer, through old age? I see the church as being like logs added to your fire. With one log alone the log smolders, it starts burning down. The church comes along and adds fuel. It strengthens you to do the right thing. Last week we showed you a brief video from a woman named Ambria who was planning to get an abortion because she suddenly found herself pregnant. Being unwed and having lots of career ambitions, she strongly considered getting an abortion. I want to show you another clip from Ambria s testimony. Ambria Arden s Testimony Video Clip #2 Without the church where do you get strengthened and encouraged to do the right thing? Without the church where will you go to break a habit? Look at what the Apostle Paul says in Romans 12: 9: Romans 12:9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. So many people misunderstand love. They don t realize that love has a moral component to it. For love to be genuine, you have to hate what is evil and hold onto what is good. So many folks don t understand this especially men. We often hear men saying, Well, baby, if you really love me, you ll sleep with me before marriage. The response is, If I really loved you, I would hate what is immoral in your life. I would hate you doing something that will destroy your relationship with God and destroy my relationship with God. Well, honey, if you really loved me, you would watch pornography with me, or leave me alone about my porn use. The response: Darling, if I really loved you, with real love, and with genuine love that hates what is evil, I would not compromise Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 13

14 Let me put it this way: without the church you and I have no hope for any kind of moral purity in this filthy world. No hope. Because where do you go for moral encouragement in this world other than church? See, it is in the context of relationship that we can hold each other accountable and encourage one another in attitudes and behaviors that are the will of God for us. Let me tell you what I do. I have a prayer partner who is on staff here at the church, Stephen Van Dop. Stephen and I take a day a month to pray together. But you don t need a day; just an hour with one other Christian. One thing that Stephen and I do with each other is we ask one another on our prayer day very probing questions. Like: 1. Have you been a testimony this week to the greatness of Jesus Christ with both your words and actions? 2. Have you been exposed to sexually alluring material or allowed your mind to entertain inappropriate sexual thoughts about another this week? 3. Have you lacked integrity in your financial dealings or coveted something that does not belong to you? 4. Have you been honoring, understanding and generous in your important relationships this week? 5. Have you damaged another person by your words, either behind their back or face to face? 6. Have you given in to an addictive behavior this past week? Explain. 7. Have you continued to remain angry toward another? 8. Have secretly wished for another s misfortune? We go through a series of brutally probing questions with each other because I will tell you that I know I cannot do the Christian life by myself. I can t live a clean life in a filthy world without the church. And you can t either. Finally, Without the church where will you go for comfort when you experience loss? Romans 12:15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 14

15 There is no way to go through life without experiencing from time to time deep and profound loss. I want to read to you a testimony by one of the members of our church staff about the difference this church made in her life when she suddenly lost her beloved husband after nearly 40 years of marriage. My husband, Jerry, died very suddenly almost a year ago. He was a Columbus Police Reserve Officer, working at the Race for the Cure when he experienced chest pain, was rushed to the hospital and subsequently died during surgery. At that moment, my life was forever changed and I honestly didn t know how or if I would survive. I met Jerry when I was 19 years old, and we would soon have celebrated our 40 th wedding anniversary. Our marriage was a testimony of the power of God to heal and restore our broken lives, and we were looking forward to growing old together. I can t begin to describe the pain and grief that I experienced. I wanted to die and prayed that the Lord would take me, too. I had never been alone in my entire life and the fear of being alone for the rest of my life, was overwhelming. There were days when it took everything within me just to get out of bed in the morning and keep moving. During the past year, the Lord has surrounded me with a network of loving friends, co-workers, and family members who have walked this journey of grief with me. Their prayers, words of encouragement and hope, and outward expressions of love have enabled me to press on in faith, believing that God IS good and that He has a plan and a purpose for my life. Their support was amazing, but at times I felt like I was stuck in grief. A friend told me about GriefShare, a support group at Vineyard Columbus for those who have experienced the death of a loved one, and suggested that I check it out. I had never been in a support group before and was skeptical about how it could help, but I went and I m so glad I did! For 13 weeks, we shared our lives, our pain, our tears and broken dreams. Each week, the materials focused on God s Word and helped us to process through our grief, moving towards healing. I was amazed as we went through this class together, that we were becoming stronger, finding hope and encouraging one another. It seemed like we were becoming almost like a family. In fact, several of us have kept in touch since the class ended. Personally, I know that there is no way I could have made it through the past year without the people that God so graciously put into my life. I know that we were not meant to do life alone and I will be forever grateful to my precious Vineyard Columbus family who reached out to me in my greatest hour of need. This has been the most painful experience of my life, but I know that God is with me and I cling to His promise that He will turn my mourning into dancing Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 15

16 We all need support systems. We all need encouragement. We all need accountability. We all need teaching. You simply cannot do life well as a solitary Christian without deep connection with the church. So, what am I asking you to do? Let me mention three things today in closing: #1 Many of you have never joined this church, but you are coming here. And you believe that this is your home church, or you at least want to explore that. Sunday, at 2:30 at our main campus in our multipurpose room we are hosting a Newcomers Class. Newcomers Class 2:30 at Vineyard Columbus Main Campus That is our membership class. The grass will wait for you. Gardening will wait. You can shop another time. We have childcare here at the main campus. Take the next step of connection with the church by coming to Newcomers Class. #2 If you are coming to the church and you are a member, but you are not in a small group, a women s group, or a men s group, or some kind of support group here so that you are coming and listening to teaching, you re worshipping God, and for whatever reason your group collapsed. You used to go; you never went. You need to be in a small group. We have several ways to find a good small group: 1. Go to the Vineyard website, click on the Small Group tab and scroll down to the Small Group Finder. 2. Stop by the Relationship Bay in the main lobby and talk with one of the small group pastors or leaders and ask them to assist you in finding a small group. 3. Pick up a Small Group Booklet in the lobby You need church; not just attendance at a church, but deep connection with other Christians in a small group. #3 We believe at Vineyard Columbus that there is a need for dozens of churches like this church throughout our nation and our world. We have set a goal here at Vineyard Columbus of planting, that is starting, 20 new Vineyard churches in the next decade. We re joining with the Vineyard Movement which has a plan of planting 750 new churches in the next decade. We re taking one piece of that. We re going to plant 20 in the next decade. We want to plant two churches every year starting next year Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 16

17 So, you may feel that God is calling you to be involved in planting a church. Right after each service we re going to have meetings here at our main campus and also at our satellite campuses for anyone who may be interested in planting. Main Campus Saturday (room C-01 by the Café) Sunday (balcony by the Café) Sawmill Campus Middle School Room Lane Avenue Campus Upstairs Loft We need church. You need church; I need church. You cannot live the Christian life successfully without church. Let s pray Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 17

18 I Don t Need Church Rich Nathan May 15, 2011 Myths: Myths That Christians Believe Series Romans 12:1-16 I. An amazing phenomenon: The Social Cure II. A growing epidemic: Unchurched Christians III. A prospect of change A. All change involves our bodies B. All change involves our thoughts C. All change involves the church IV. The means of change A. Common starting point B. Common membership C. Common needs 1. Without the church where will you go for teaching 2. Without the church where will you go for encouragement 3. Without the church where will you go for help to break a habit 4. Without the church where will you go for comfort when you experience loss 2010 Rich Nathan VineyardColumbus.org 18