Grady Greg Gideon Byrd, III Christopher Freeman Byrd Phillip Armstrong Byrd

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1 Trinity Episcopal Church Asheville, North Carolina May 11, 2015 Grady Greg Gideon Byrd, III Christopher Freeman Byrd Phillip Armstrong Byrd **************************************** In the name of the Blessed Trinity, One God: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. There is one phrase in the Bible that is perhaps all that is needed to understand what God is up to in coming to us in Jesus. It is short. It is simple from the letter to the Hebrews: he had to enter into every detail of human life. [So that] when he came before God [on behalf of the people] he would have already experienced it all himself all the pain, all the testing and would be able to help where help is needed." (Heb.2:17) Just last week, in another context and for another purpose, I wrote these following words: everybody has gone through something that has changed them in a way that they could never go back to the person they once were. These words have never been more real than they are today. None of us can go back to Friday. None of us will ever be the same. Many of us here will be able to go back to some sense of normalcy in the weeks and months ahead. Others will find themselves in a new world, a new country, walking a new journey for the rest of their lives. There is no, moving forward, there is never any closure. There is only learning to live in a new reality. And this new reality will have a new language. The language will have a different vocabulary, and a lot fewer words, having learned, in ways that some never learn, that words often fail us. I m sure you too have felt too over these past few days, that sometimes tears alone are the only language for our grief. Even on this day and at this hour words, even these words of mine will not suffice for the depth of our grief. Yet, words are all that God has given me. Still, even in our deepest despair we thirst for a word that might comfort our sorrows. Especially when, as Shakespeare once wrote, sorrows come not as single spies but as a battalion. It is striking to us that in the English language there is a word for orphans and a word for widows but there is no word for a parent who loses a child. There is no word for a child

2 who loses a parent and his siblings. There is no word for a sister who loses a brother, a brother a sister, and no word for grandparents who live longer than their grandchildren. There are no words for these states of being because no one wants to imagine it happening. It s not the right order of things. It just doesn t make any sense. Perhaps this is the first thing that must be said today, that so very often life doesn t make sense. Even people of faith recognize and claim this truth. You have noticed, I m sure, that life is often confusing. There are always a lot more questions than answers, and questions that always seem to remain unanswerable. For all types of reasons, some of which we have clues for and some which we don t, this world and this life that we inhabit is imperfect. Perfection, not only in the moral universe, but also in the whole created order, is not to be had by us. Human beings are imperfect. That s just is all there is to it. The things we do are not always going to turn out the way we want them to or the way they should. The things we make are not always going to work the way that we intended them to. The choices of life, whether conscious or unconscious, are just not going to be perfect all of the time, no matter how hard we try to make them so. We can only see through a mirror dimly says the Apostle Paul. Clear sight of all things and all things eternal is not ours to posses. The truth is we simply do not know why things happen the way that they do. Of course, we are always going to keep asking, why? That is normal. Why is this happening? Why is it happening now? Why me? Why not me, rather than them? If only we had. But, we are not going to know, on this side of eternity, the answers to so many of our questions. Sometimes, bad people prosper, and good people suffer but it still ok to ask our questions. Even Jesus asked, why? As he hung on the cross, in abject suffering Jesus himself looked to heaven and asked, Why has thou forsaken me? Which, for the person of faith, is our first clue about God's role in our suffering and in our salvation. God did not become a human being to avoid the difficulties of life. God became a human being so that we might know, that God knows, what it is like to be one of us, in all of joys and in all of our sorrows. God became a human being to lead all of us through the imperfections of this life through the shadows and valleys of death, so that we might have hope that the darkness of this world is never the last word, and never the final outcome so that we might know that God's power is stronger than death. Perhaps this is our only foundation today, our only glimpse of comfort: that God knows what it is like to be one of us. "What if God was one of us?" was a popular pop song from a number of years back. "Just a stranger on a bus, trying to make his way home." Well, God is one of us. We do not have a God, who is unable to sympathize with us in our weakness and darkness, but one who, in every respect knows what it is like to be us. We have a God, who walks with us through the darkest rivers of life and makes sure that we do not drown. He leads us to see, even in the most difficult times, that there is another day. He undoes the story of this world the story that says that, life lasts a short and death goes on

3 forever and he causes us to see the truth of God: that life in this realm may be short, yet it is but the beginning of a life that goes on forever, and nothing not even death can stop it.. And a life well lived, even those cut short, is one thing we can celebrate today. Now my retelling of others' memories will never be as holy as the stories and memories you all share with each other today and in the days ahead. Yet, I've heard many stories about four beautiful children of God: Greg, Christopher, Jackie and Phillip. In fact, when I got to Hope's house Friday afternoon, I was sitting by her, and she introduced me to a few family members and soon after many people started coming into the house. She introduced me to someone and said, "This is Greg s best friend coming in, and I introduced myself and offered my prayer and sympathies. We sat back down, and I met a few more family members. Then Hope would notice someone else walking down the driveway, and she said, Oh, Scott, this is Greg's best friend coming in." The same thing must have happened three or four more times. He not only had best friends, he knew how to be a best friend. Greg was the type of person people relied on. He loved life, and he loved the adventures of life. He was the person people turned to get things done. He was the "go-to" guy. He had built a wonderful life of happiness and love with Theresa, and he loved his children and wanted to spend time with them. Greg is one of God's beloved children. Christopher followed in his father s stead. He had, says one, all of Greg s great qualities. He s the one you would call to fix the TV...to make it work with the DVD...to a make it work with the Audio...to make it all work with the video. He loved to help people and as the oldest he is the one the rest of the family kids and cousins looked up to. Christopher did everything the right way, said one cousin to me, and I looked up to him as I was growing into my own sense of manhood. He was the stable one. Christopher was joined to Jackie's hip. She was tiny, but she the lit up the room. Smart, hard working, and she cared about things. Peggy Byrd was relieved that there was finally a girl in the family she could pass her heirlooms onto who would love and care for them. Loved by her parents, the apple of her grandparents eyes, adored by her brother, Matt, Focused, beautiful, she and Christopher were truly a couple, truly in love. When she walked into the room, Christopher would stop and look at her, and his whole face would light up. They took things seriously yet together they knew how to have fun. They respected each other, loved each other. Phillip had love for everybody a man and a man with a sweet heart. Phillip was one of those who never came into or left the room without saying, "I love you." He had the ability to enjoy life to its full. He was in a good place. Enjoying a growing business and life itself. With Christopher joined to Jackie's hip Phillip, and his brother Robert had the

4 opportunity for their brotherly companionship and love to grow and flourish in ways that many of us never have with a sibling. He, said Robert, was my best friend. Greg, Christopher, Jackie and Phillip. They were all in a good place, it has been said to me a number of times. This should not have happened; their lives have been cut way too short. Yet to walk into eternity when you are in a good place, when you are at peace with yourself and your neighbors, is a blessing and a comfort that can be held in the heart. We have been reminded these past few days of that which already know but often let fade: that each and every day and each and every moment of life is a gift. Each day must be cherished, each moment with those we love held in sacred trust. Greg, Christopher, Jackie and Phillip. Their lives were lived, not in vain, not wasted. They have been a gift to us, and we take this gift and hold it until we are all reunited, in that place where there is no pain or sorrow. For we are truly bound together by a tie that can never be broken by the love of God. It is as our opening hymn states, the hymn of Christ School: Christ be with me, Christ within me, Christ behind me, Christ before me, Christ beside me, Christ to win me, Christ to comfort and restore me, Christ beneath me, Christ above me, Christ in quiet, Christ in danger, Christ hearts of all that love me, Christ in mouth of friend and stranger. God came among us in Jesus that he might know exactly what it is like to be one of us and so that he would be bound to us, and we to him. Whatever happens to him happens to us. He too died, and he was raised to eternal life. We too, all of us, shall die, and we too shall rise with him. And for us who remain in this realm, Christ is still with us, walking with us in this valley of the shadow of death. There is a special blessing that many here know well. The Christ School Blessing. There are no better words for us to hold in our hearts this and every day. Life is short, And we do not know

5 how much time we have to gladden the hearts of those who travel the dark way with us; So be swift to love, and make haste to be kind. And may God, who is beyond our ability to fully understand, but who knows us, and who loves us, and who travels with us, Bless us and keep us, in peace.

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