FIRST BAPTIST RAYTOWN BUILD YOURSELF A BRIDGE AND GET OVER IT APRIL 12, 2015
BUILDING BRIDGES APRIL 12, 2015 PREPARATION > Spend the week reading through and studying Matthew 18:21-35. Consult the commentary provided and any additional study tools (such as a concordance or Bible dictionary) to enhance your preparation. > Determine which discussion points and questions will work best with your group. > Pray for Pastor Brandon, the upcoming group meeting, your teaching, your group members, and their receptivity to the study. HIGHLIGHTS BIBLICAL EMPHASIS: Christians are a forgiven people. God has released us from a debt that we could have never repaid on our own. And so, as people who have been forgiven, we forgive others out of love for God and our neighbor. TEACHING AIM: Living with resentment is harmful to our souls, our relationship with God, and others. Forgiveness happens when we release to the Lord any bitterness we feel entitled to and let God handle the matter in His own way. 2 Building Bridges First Baptist Raytown
INTRODUCTION As your group time begins, use this section to help get the conversation going. 1 Can you remember a time when you really owed someone an apology? What made you realize that you owed it? 2 How did it feel to seek forgiveness? What did you have to overcome to do so? 3 Which is more difficult for you seeking forgiveness or granting forgiveness? Why? The word forgiveness literally means: To let go or to send away It is often a humbling experience to seek or grant forgiveness because it forces us to deal with our sin and others sins as well. For the believer, forgiveness is unavoidable because it is a defining mark of the Christian life. If you were to do an online search for the word forgiveness, you would find countless articles advocating for forgiveness that are written from a Christian perspective. Why? Because Christians have been forgiven and are thus compelled to extend that same forgiveness to others, both in our interpersonal relationships, and through our proclamation of the Gospel. Resentment means: To think again UNDERSTANDING Unpack the biblical text to discover what Scripture says or means about a particular topic. > Have a volunteer read Matthew 18:21-27. Peter came to Jesus and asked Him a question about the nature of forgiveness. In response, Jesus told a parable to help Peter (and us today) understand what forgiveness is like in the kingdom of heaven. 3 Building Bridges First Baptist Raytown
What do you think Peter expected Jesus to say when he asked if someone should forgive a brother seven times (v. 21)? Grace-based Forgiveness - A Better Way: What did Jesus answer reveal about Peter s motives in asking the question (v. 22)? What was his false assumption? Have you ever approached Jesus with a question like Peter s? How is forgiveness ultimately an otherscentered process? Peter expected Jesus to be satisfied with his suggested number of times for forgiveness. In the Jewish tradition, a person was supposed to forgive another three times. But Jesus blew both the tradition and Peter s question out of the water. Peter was selfishly motivated, he wanted a pat on the back from Jesus. Real forgiveness is unselfishly motivated. Jesus explained how often a person should forgive by telling this parable about settling debts. Why is it so significant that Jesus brought up the kingdom of heaven at the beginning of His parable? To the degree that we focus on God as the source of our ability to love and forgive ourselves, we will be able to offer to others that same grace-based stance that He has towards us. This will apply to our individual situations no matter how terrible others hurtful actions have been towards us. We will only be effective to the degree that God is the power behind the process and that we allow Him to take the place of lordship in our lives. We as Christians have a responsibility to pursue maturity and growth in our ability to be more like Christ, especially in the forgiveness realm. God s forgiveness towards us is a Grace-based process: He has forgiven us (Justification) He is forgiving us (Sanctification) How large was the debt that the servant owed to his master? What might be a comparable amount today? He will forgive us forever (Glorification). What did the servant request? How did the master respond? What motivated the master to respond the way that he did? -http://www.lifeway.com/article/ Pastoral-care-counseling-A-betterway-to-forgive 4 Building Bridges First Baptist Raytown
Jesus told parables of the Kingdom to help the disciples see what life is like in the kingdom of heaven. The kingdom of heaven is not like our earthly home. There is a new Kingdom ethic that guides the way we are to live, relate to God, and treat others. In this parable, one particular servant owed ten thousand talents, and each talent was about twenty years worth of wages for a laborer. The amount of debt was astronomical. But of course, even this amount is minuscule compared to the price of salvation. Can you imagine being forgiven a debt as severe as the servant in this parable? What would be your response? How is our salvation a much greater debt than what the servant owed? How should that affect our response to it? Medical benefits of forgiveness: Healthier relationships Greater psychological well-being Less anxiety and stress Lower blood pressure > Have a volunteer read Matthew 18:28-35. How much did the second servant owe the first? How did this compare with what the first servant owed his master? Less depression Stronger immune system Improved heart health Higher self esteem How did he approach his fellow servant? Were you surprised by the severity of his response? http://www.mayoclinic.org/healthyliving/adult-health/in-depth/ forgiveness/art-20047692 How did the second servant respond when the first servant came for collection (v. 29)? What would you have expected the first servant to do? Why? After being forgiven, the first servant went to a second servant who owed him money, 100 denarii, and began to assault him. He owed 5 Building Bridges First Baptist Raytown
100 days wages. The second servant fell on the ground and pleaded with the same words the first servant had spoken before the king. His own debt far exceeded the amount owed to him by the second servant, many times over, but the servant had not learned his lesson. Although he had been forgiven, he felt no need to extend that same forgiveness to his own servant. What often causes the lack of mercy and compassion we see in this parable? I m forgiven because You were forsaken. I m accepted, You were condemned. How did the other servants respond to the exchange that took place between the first two servants? Why were they so distressed? Were they right to tell their master? I m alive and well, Your spirit is within me because You died and rose again. The other servants of the household recognized the cruelty of the first servant toward the second. This grieved them deeply. How deeply do we grieve when we see bitterness and grudges being held between fellow believers? Such discord in the family of God causes great sorrow to the Father. And so, as we share His heart, we will not be able to stand by and observe such discord indifferently. Instead, we should grieve over unforgiving hearts, just as He does. Amazing love, how can it be that You, my King, would die for me? Amazing love, I know it s true, And it s my joy to honor You. In all I do, I honor You. How did the master respond to the actions of the first servant? What reason did he give in verse 33 for responding in this way? - Amazing Love by Billy Jame Foote Do you think the king s punishment was fair? Why or why not? How does this parable emphasize Jesus point about forgiveness? 6 Building Bridges First Baptist Raytown
The two original characters reappeared on stage for the final scene. Furious that his lavish mercy was so spurned, the king vented his rage, ordering the servant to be imprisoned and tortured until he should pay back all he owed. Since the man has no way of earning this kind of money in jail, the king s orders guaranteed a life sentence. Ironically, the king delivered the servant from prison, but the servant put himself back in prison through his response. Re-read verse 35. How does God view unforgiveness? What does it mean to forgive others from your heart? Four Barriers to Forgiveness: SELF-DECEPTION SELF-DEFENSE SELF-IMAGE SELF-PROTECTION God takes unforgiving hearts very seriously. The fate of the unforgiving servant is meant to be a lesson to anyone who does not forgive others, especially our brothers and sisters in Christ. The point of Jesus parable is simple: Christians have been forgiven of a debt they could never repay, so they are compelled to generously forgive others without conditions in response. APPLICATION Help your group identify how the truths from the Scripture passage apply directly to their lives. 1 Is there anyone who has wronged you from whom you are withholding forgiveness today? Forgiveness in Four Ds: DEFER to God DECIDE to take the initiative DISENGAGE from your emotions DELIVER your enemies to God 2 On Sunday we learned about barriers to forgiveness. Which of these do you struggle with most? How can you overcome this barrier by looking to the cross? 7 Building Bridges First Baptist Raytown
3 How does the cross motivate Christians to be forgiving people? Could God ever ask us to forgive another person for a greater offense than we have committed against Him? 4 Where else does the Bible speak about forgiveness? What Scripture could you pray through to help you forgive others? P R A Y Take time today to thank Jesus for the unfathomable forgiveness we have been granted through the cross. Pray that God would continually use the forgiveness we have received in Him to compel us towards becoming more forgiving people. Finally, ask that He would reveal to you any hidden resentment in your heart from which you need to be released. FOLLOW UP Midway through this week, send a follow-up email to your group with some or all of the following information: Pray that God would reveal areas of hidden resentment to you, as well as the opportunities He s given you to demonstrate His grace through your response to them. Are you struggling with forgiveness? Use this week to meditate on the parable we discussed, asking the Lord to help you become a more forgiving person, defined by His mercy and grace. > The challenge to memorize Matthew 6:12. 8 Building Bridges First Baptist Raytown
COMMENTARY APRIL 12, 2015 MATTHEW 18:21-35 18:21-22. Peter spoke for the Twelve. His question could easily have sprung out of Jesus teaching on church discipline (18:15-20). Peter may have wondered how long he should forgive his sinning brother before casting him out of the church, especially when the sin was against him personally. According to some Jewish tradition, a brother was forgiven three times for the same offense. The fourth offense, however, need not be forgiven, because it would be evidence that the brother had not repented. Peter thought he was being generous in forgiving up to seven times. There is some debate over whether Jesus response should read seventy times seven (490) or seventy-seven, but the exact number is not important. The numbers involved are presented for emphasis only. Notes: 18:23. Therefore was Jesus way of introducing the parable to illustrate the principle He stated in 18:22. He told the disciples first they were going to learn something about the kingdom of heaven (18:1-4), and He set the scene by introducing the characters (a king and his servants) and explaining the king s desire to settle accounts with his servants to collect from them what they owed him. The king represents God, and the servants represent fellow believers. 18:24-25. It was not uncommon for servants and indebted free men to be sold as slaves to cover debts they could not pay (Lev. 25:39; 2 Kings. 4:1). In Israel, these slaves were freed every fiftieth year, in the year of Jubilee, in accordance with the Mosaic Law. In some cultures, even their families and possessions were sold if the debtor did not bring enough money to cover the debt. Such was the case with a certain servant of this king. He owed a large amount. No slave could ever hope to repay this amount in a thousand lifetimes. 18:26. The servant fell on his knees before him (8:2; 9:18; 15:25), displaying humility and desperation and casting himself on the mercy of the master. The servant s plea for patience and his promise to pay back everything were so unrealistic that they could only be the words of a desperate man. His promise might be compared with a factory worker today pledging to pay off 9 Building Bridges First Baptist Raytown
COMMENTARY APRIL 12, 2015 the national debt of the United States by himself. It could not be done. The issue is brother-to-brother forgiveness. 18:27. The servant s master felt his heart going out to the man. He took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. The servant was undeserving, but the king acted with mercy (withholding punishment that was deserved) and grace (giving a great gift that was not deserved). So it should be among brothers and sisters in God s family. Notes: 18:28. The word but contrasts the first servant and his relationship with a second servant. The two were alike in only one way the debt each owed gave the creditor power over the debtor s life. But in every other respect, the situations were opposites, highlighting the contrast between the first servant and the king. The servant had not understood family principles; but he was about to learn. The amount the second servant owed the first was insignificant when compared with the debt the first servant had just been forgiven. One hundred denarii was one hundred days wages. The first servant had owed more than half a million times as much to the king! Rather than imitating the mercy of the king, the first servant mistreated the second servant ( began to choke him ) and demanded repayment of the debt. 18:29-30. The actions and words of the second servant were almost identical to those of the first servant in 18:26. This servant also fell to his knees in humility, asking for patience and offering to repay the debt. But the first servant refused to give the second servant a chance to repay the debt. We tend to forget our King s grace, often refusing to forgive even the most trifling of offenses against us. 18:31. The other servants of the household recognized the cruelty of the first servant toward the second. This grieved them deeply. These servants reported the matter to the king. 18:32-33. The angry king held one more audience with the first servant, this time to bring him to account for failing to follow the merciful king s example. God the Father values His children for different reasons. Like this king, the Father does not want any of His children harmed or taken out of His service through mistreatment by others. 10 Building Bridges First Baptist Raytown
COMMENTARY APRIL 12, 2015 18:34. The king was so angry at the first servant s mistreatment of the second that he rescinded his previous order to release the first servant and forgive his debt. He imprisoned the servant and turned him over to the jailers to be tortured. The parable reveals the anger of the king and his refusal to tolerate an arrogant lack of forgiveness among his family. But notice there is nothing said here about eternal damnation. These are family issues. Family forgiveness restores what was lost (relational intimacy) and is unrelated to what can never be lost (imputed righteousness and therefore eternal salvation). Notes: 18:35. Jesus closing application was sobering. Each of you brings the focus to the level of individual responsibility. We can imagine Jesus scanning the faces of the disciples as He closed His discourse. We can also imagine Him looking out through the words of Matthew into our hearts with His warning lingering in our conscience. Jesus insisted that His servants be characterized by forgiveness. 11 Building Bridges First Baptist Raytown