Shall a Man Leave His Father and His Mother? (Genesis 2:24)

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BYU Women s Conference 2006 Rise to the Divinity Within You President Gordon B. Hinckley May 5, 2006 Concurrent Session Shall a Man Leave His Father and His Mother? (Genesis 2:24) 250 Spencer W. Kimball Tower (SWKT) Introduction to the session: Maintaining positive relationships after children reach adulthood is no small task. How do we balance positive influence with appropriate separation and selfreliance when adult children experience financial setbacks, bad choices, divorce, ill health, problematic relationships, or other challenges? How can we care without being overindulgent or jeopardizing our own futures? 1

Presenter: Shirley E. Cox Forging Eternal Bonds With Our Children Behold I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord: And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse. Malachi 4: 5-6 Joseph Smith, Jr. D & C 128:18 I might have rendered a plainer translation to this, but it is sufficiently plain to suit my purpose as it stands. It is sufficient to know, in this case, that the earth will be smitten with a curse unless there is a welding link of some kind or other between the fathers and the children 2

for it is necessary in the ushering in of the dispensation of the fullness of times, which dispensation is now beginning to usher in, that a whole and complete and perfect union, and welding together of keys, and powers, and glories should take place, and be revealed from the days of Adam even to the present time. D & C 128 v.18 Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, (The Family: A Proclamation to the President Jeffrey R. Holland (1981) I had a chance to suggest last spring to some of the women who gathered on this campus that Adam and Eve left the garden primarily for two reasons, and as I read it, they had a lot of other reasons to stay 3

They could backstroke in the lagoon every morning and pluck wild berries for lunch and avoid all these problems of growing up with all the difficulties you and I know about if they stayed in the garden They would not have had children and they could not have become like the gods, knowing good from evil. And against all those other very attractive and very accommodating and very pleasant reasons to stay in the garden, they left to have a family and gain knowledge and pass that knowledge on to their family. p. 5. 1981 BYU Devotional Address, 25 August 4

Reasons for our being on earth: To experience the problems of growing up in this existence, To gain knowledge, and To pass that knowledge on to our families. Problems of Growing Up : separation, self-reliance (when adult children experience financial setbacks), bad choices, divorce, ill health, problematic relationships, or other challenges We Gain Knowledge by: Leaving the Garden and moving out into the lone and dreary world. Living among and Serving others. Loving, Respecting, and showing Compassion for Others. Striving to become like the Savior. Repenting and Forgiving. Never giving up. 5

Rearing Children in a Moral Sense a. Families are the world in which we shape and manage our emotions.. b. The family is a continuous locus of reciprocal obligations that constitute an unending school for moral instruction c. We learn to cope with the people of this world because we learn to cope with the members of our family d. Those who flee the family, flee the world; bereft of the former s affection, tutelage, and challenges, they are unprepared for the latter s tests, judgments, and demands. James Q Wilson, as cited by Bahr, Loveless and Beutler in Strengthening Our Families, p. 171. The Divinity Within CS Lewis stated: It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest and most uninteresting person you can talk to may one day be a creature which, if you saw it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare All day long we are, in some degree, helping each other to one or other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all our dealings with one another CS Lewis p. 39. 6

Bibliography Bahr, H.M.; Loveless, A.S. & Beutler, I.F. (2000) Chapter 12. Love, Respect, and Compassion in Families. In Strengthening Our Families: An In- Depth Look at the Proclamation on the Family, ed. David C. Dollahite. SLC: Bookcraft. Byrd, A.D. (2001) Homosexuality and the Church of Jesus Christ. Springville, Ut: Cedar Fort Publishing. Byrd, A.D. & Cox, S.E. (2005) Chapter 34. Same Sex Attraction. In Helping and Healing Our Families. SLC: Deseret Book Company. Holland, Jeffrey R. (1981) That Our children May Know BYU Devotional Address 25 August 1981. Retrieved April 18, 2006 from: http://speeches.byu.edu/reader/reader.php?id=6795&x=5 4&y=5 Lewis, C.S. (1996) The Weight of Glory. New York: Simon & Schuster. Wilson, James Q. (1993) The Moral Sense. New York: Maxwell Macmillan Int l. 7