LESSON 5 Unselfish Friendships Four Step Lesson Path Bible Readiness To connect with the Bible story of Jonathan and David s friendship, children will share about friends and perform a drama. - - Bible Discoveries, page 1, whiteboard; optional: trench coat, magnifying glass Lesson Focus: The best friend is an unselfish friend. Memory Verse: There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24 Bible Study: 1 Samuel 20 Children will study how Jonathan helps his friend David. Bible Story: Bible Discoveries, pp. 2-3, Teaching Aid 2, 4, Bibles, pencils Bible Review: Egg carton, button, fine-tipped marker Memory Verse Activity: Self-stick notes, pen Bible Activity Choices Children will discover ways to be an unselfish friend. Story Tag: No materials needed Pencils Pals: Discovery Pack, Project E, markers, new pencils Recipe for a Good Friend: Butcher paper, markers, index cards, pencils Bible Response Children will apply the Bible story from 1 Samuel 20 by choosing ways to be an unselfish friend this week. Extra-Special Friend (Teaching Aid 5 from Elementary Creative Teaching Aids), pencils, Friends, Lesson 5 Understanding the Bible Saul had been pursuing David with the intent to kill him. David had gone to Samuel at Naioth in Ramah to tell the prophet what was going on. Saul pursued David to Ramah, but was overcome by the Spirit of God. David made his escape and went to his close friend Jonathan, Saul s son, for help. David seems to have been genuinely mystified at the king s hostility toward him. Apparently David was not aware of the depth of Saul s jealousy. David knew he would never attempt to usurp the throne, but Saul was not convinced. The king wanted his son Jonathan to succeed him, despite the prophecies spoken against this ever happening (1 Sam. 13:13-14; 15:26). Jonathan was the oldest of Saul s five children. David had already slipped through Saul s hands previously with help from the king s children. Jonathan had already pleaded David s cause before the king. The king s daughter Michal had tricked Saul on David s behalf (19:4-7, 11-17). The New Moon festival was observed on the first day of each lunar month with special sacrifices and festivities. David would be expected to celebrate this festival with the king s family because he was married to the king s daughter, Michal. Saul saw through David and Jonathan s latest plan and became enraged that David had escaped him once more. 36 This symbol will appear whenever preparation takes more than five minutes or whenever supplies are needed that are not included on the list of standard materials (on page 6).
LESSON 5 When Teaching the Bible to Elementary Students... This week the children will learn about unselfish friendships through the example of David and Jonathan. Second and third graders tend to develop a small group of closer friends, though the kids in that group may change throughout the school year. Within that group there s usually a best friend, who can also change from week to week. Kids this age are usually willing to make compromises with friends and are also recognizing that their words and actions affect their friends feelings. You can help your students build unselfish friendships with these ideas: When kids want to do different activities, encourage them to compromise or take turns. If a squabble erupts, encourage the kids to calmly talk it through and really listen to each other s point of view. Praise kids when you catch them sharing, cooperating, and taking turns. Teacher Devotional What makes a great friendship? Jot down some of your ideas. Is unselfishness on your list? Did sacrifice, time, or effort make it on your list? Most people place a high value on friendship. And yet we can easily get caught up in our need to earn money, juggle our schedules, build our collections, and take on responsibilities. Friendship requires sacrifice. Friendship needs devotion. Friendship is nurtured when we unselfishly share our time with others. Read John 15:9-13. Jesus reminds us to remain in His love by loving one another as He loved us. After all, there is no greater love than laying down your life for a friend! That was the unselfish commitment that Jesus gave to us. How will you reach out in friendship to others? Early Bird Options Here are activities to engage children who arrive early while you are setting up and greeting newcomers. Friendship Pictures To help the children begin thinking about friendships, let the kids draw a picture of their best friend. They should list on their pictures all the reasons why that person is their friend (for example, why the friend is special, what makes the friendship important, and things they like to do with their friend). Provide paper and colored markers. Friendship Mural To prepare the children to hear the lesson about Jonathan and David s friendship, let kids make a mural of their friends. On a sheet of butcher paper, let the kids either write the names of as many friends as they can think of or draw pictures of all of their friends. 37
LESSON FOCUS: The best friend is an unselfish friend. Bible Readiness To connect with the Bible story of Jonathan and David s friendship, children will share about friends and perform a drama. Materials: Bible Discoveries, p. 1 Whiteboard and markers Optional: trench coat, magnifying glass Link to Last Week Last week the children learned that they can trust God instead of being jealous. Share together how it worked to pray when feeling jealous. Praise their efforts and remind them that they can trust God. Because children this age love to have friends, they will enjoy learning about Jonathan and David s friendship in the Bible story from 1 Samuel 20. This opening activity will help the children begin thinking about the unique qualities of that biblical friendship, especially David and Jonathan s unselfishness toward each other. What is a friend? Encourage students to tell you what a friend is in their own words. The kids might end up suggesting a definition like A friend is someone who really cares about you and likes you and takes time for you or A real friend is someone who will not be selfish and who is fun to be with. You may wish to share a dictionary definition with them as well. After writing ideas on the board as students suggest them, take time to create a class definition of friend. Keep the definition on the board for the lessonn. What do you think makes a good friend? Suggestions might include sharing, having things in common, taking time for each other, helping each other, being patient, being caring, and so on. Let s find out what K.C., our Bible Investigator, finds out about friendship today. Give a part to five volunteers. The roles of K.C. and Zach will work well for confident readers. If you want, give out roles as students come in and then let them read over the drama before class. Have your volunteers perform the drama on page 1 of Bible Discoveries. After finishing the drama, lead your students in discussion. What suggestions did Zach s friends give him to solve his problem? How did those suggestions show each friend was or wasn t a good friend? Refer back to your class definition of a friend. When has someone been a good friend to you? Children will have a wide range of answers from sharing to helping to giving up something to making a special effort. Tie to the Bible The best friend is an unselfish friend. That means that we think more about our friend than we do about ourselves. Today s story is about a great friendship. Let s see what these friends did to be unselfish and help each other. 38
Bible Study: 1 Samuel 20 Children will study how Jonathan helps his friend David. Materials: Bible Study Bible Discoveries, pp. 2-3 Bibles Teaching Aids 2, 4 Pencils Bible Review Activity Egg carton Button Fine-tipped marker Memory Verse Practice Self-stick notes Pen Use Teaching Aid 2 to remind the children that you have been studying about Saul and David. Point out that their stories are found in the Old Testament in the Book of 1 Samuel. Hand out Bible Discoveries for Lesson 5. Have the kids find page 1. To refresh the children s memories of where last week s Bible story left off, who David and Saul were. (Saul was the king of Israel who disobeyed God. David was a shepherd who trusted God. David had fought Goliath. Saul had brought David to live at the palace and play music for him. Saul was jealous of David.) King Saul had several sons, and one was named Jonathan. David and Jonathan got to be friends while David was living at the palace. Hang Teaching Aid 4 after Teaching Aid 3 for your visual timeline in your Bible study area. Leave a small space between the posters to represent the time that passed between last week s story and today s story. Point out that giving a robe showed friendship. Have the kids open their Bibles to 1 Samuel 20. Let volunteers read different paragraphs of the Bible story beginning on page 2 of Bible Discoveries. When you reach the reference for 1 Samuel 20:42, have the whole class look it up and write the correct answers in their Bible Discoveries pages. When finished with the story, have the class read the memory verse in unison. friendship Lord Bible Discoveries, pp. 1, 2 39
LESSON FOCUS: The best friend is an unselfish friend. Bible Review Questions.. Did Saul want to kill David? How do you know? Saul got really angry when David missed having a holiday meal with him; he yelled at Jonathan that David needed to die; Saul got so angry about it that he threw his spear at Jonathan. Why hadn t King Saul told his son Jonathan that he wanted to kill David? Because Jonathan and David were good friends; he probably was afraid that Jonathan would tell David or help him. Share with your students that in Old Testament times, it was normal for kingship to pass from father to son. Saul believed Jonathan should become the next king. But if David was alive and God had chosen David, then Jonathan could not be king. Jonathan didn t care as much about being king as about trusting God and being a good friend to David. What did Jonathan agree to do for David? Jonathan agreed to put together a plan that would help him find out if his father really wanted to kill David. He also agreed to help David if his father did want to kill him. Why do you think David and Jonathan made a secret plan? Because King Saul was trying to kill David; Jonathan didn t want to give away where David was hiding or where he might go next. What unselfish friendship promises did David and Jonathan make? David promised to always be kind to Jonathan s family, even though Jonathan s father was trying to hurt him; they promised to always be friends in the name of the Lord. Why do you think Jonathan was so unselfish? Jonathan loved David as his best friend; Jonathan knew that killing David would not please God; probably Jonathan trusted God and His plan, just as David did. How does our Bible story and Proverbs 18:24 help us know what a friend is? Bible Review Activity In the bottom of an egg carton, print these 12 words related to today s Bible story: spear, danger, friend, Jonathan, promise, arrows, David, feast, Saul, anger, run away, God. Place a button into the egg carton and close the lid. Let a child shake it up, look inside, and tell the group what word the button landed on. Then that child tells what that word had to do with the Bible story. Let the rest of the group help when needed. Let the children take turns shaking the egg carton and telling about the story. Memory Verse Practice Write each word of the Bible memory verse, Proverbs 18:24, on a selfstick note. Stick one note on the back of each child. If you have a small class, stick two words (in order) on each child. If you have a large class, write out more than one copy of the verse. The kids talk to each other to find out what word is on their back. Then they line up so that the verse is in the correct order. Memory Verse There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:24 40
Bible Activity Choices Children will discover ways to be an unselfish friend. Use these activities to give the children opportunities to discover ways to be an unselfish friend, as taught in the Bible story from 1 Samuel 20. Story Tag All the players stand in front of chairs that have been placed in a circle. One volunteer stands in the center of the circle and begins to retell today s Bible story about Jonathan and David s friendship. As soon as the rest of the players hear the word friend, they quickly sit down. This will require careful listening on the part of the other players. Someone is sure to miss hearing the word friend. The storyteller tries to touch someone before they sit. If he or she is successful, the tagged player becomes the new storyteller. Everyone stands again and the new storyteller continues telling the Bible story from where it was left off. Everyone stands again and listens for the word friend. Students may become quite creative in retelling the story in order to get the word friend in often and keep the game moving. Pencil Pals Discovery Pack, Project E Markers New pencils These pencil pals will let students think about ways they can be unselfish friends. Have students follow the directions on Discovery Pack, Project E and punch out the shapes. Have them write one way a friend is unselfish on the back of each shape. Put the shapes on pencils. Students can keep one to remember to be an unselfish friend and should give the rest to friends. Encourage students to give the pencils to friends not in your class and to share the story of David and Jonathan when they give out pencils. Recipe for a Good Friend Butcher paper Markers Index cards Pencils Children this age know what it takes to be a good friend. This activity helps them think through how to include unselfishness so they are good friends. Set a piece of butcher paper on a table along with markers. Encourage children to brainstorm what they can do to be an unselfish friend and write those ideas on the butcher paper. Then have students write their own original friendship recipe, on an index card. Some idea starters are: Think about a friend s feelings and needs. Show an interest in a friend s activities. Respect a friend s values and ideas. Offer support and encourage a friend. 41
LESSON FOCUS: The best friend is an unselfish friend. Bible Response Children will apply the Bible story from 1 Samuel 20 by choosing ways to be an unselfish friend this week. Materials: Extra-Special Friend (Teaching Aid 5) Pencils Friends, Lesson 5 Use this activity to help them apply the Bible story about being an unselfish friend. If you have more than eight students, make copies of the cards from Teaching Aid 5, Extra-Special Friend, so each child has one. Be sure to copy both front and back, or copy the front and let the kids write the whole sentence on the back. We ve learned from the Bible story of Jonathan and David that the best friend is an unselfish friend. We can make our friendships better, more fun, and pleasing to God by being unselfish. Let s talk about some ways to do that. Give each child a pencil and an Extra- Special Friend card (Teaching Aid 5). Tell the kids that as you brainstorm ideas to the next question, they should listen for three ideas they like and jot them down on the back of their card. Each child will choose different ideas. What are ways that you can be an unselfish friend? Let the kids talk. Encourage them to listen to each other, and write ideas they like. Some good ideas might be to think about what my friend wants before what I want, don t get angry over little stuff, forgive, pick a special way to show my friend I care, let my friend go first, etc. Allow time for the kids to write down three ideas they liked. One of these ideas might really stand out to you. Or maybe you like different ideas for different friends. How can you be the best kind of friend this week? Choose from the ideas that you wrote down. After allowing a few moments for the kids to think, let volunteers tell what they chose and which friend or friends they will use their idea with. Prayer Time God wants us to remember that the best friend is an unselfish friend! Let s pray for our friends right now. Let anyone who wants pray for a friend or more than one friend. The kids could thank God for their friends, ask God s help in being an unselfish friend, or pray for any needs their friend might have. Close by having students challenge each other to be unselfish friends. Extra-Time Activity Have the kids review content from the Bible story with the matching activity on page 4 of Bible Discoveries. The correct answers are: 1. David 2. Jonathan 3. David 4. David 5. Jonathan 6. Jonathan TAKE HOMES Friends, Lesson 5 Bible Discoveries, Lesson 5 Discovery Pack, Pencil Pals Extra-Special Friend cards 42