If you were doing premarital counseling for an engaged couple, what would you say is the biggest surprise about being married?

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LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH FROM THIS DAY FORWARD: 4 KEYS TO A GREAT MARRIAGE WE WILL NEVER GIVE UP (COLOSSIANS 1:9-12 ; 1 TIMOTHY 1:15-16 ; 2 PETER 3:8-9) OCTOBER 14, 2012 DISCUSSION PLAN PREPARATION > SPEND THE WEEK STUDYING COLOSSIANS 1:9-12 ; 1 TIMOTHY 1:15-16 ; AND 2 PETER 3:8-9. Consult the commentary provided and any additional study tools (such as a concordance or Bible dictionary) to enhance your preparation. > DETERMINE which discussion points and questions will work best with your group. > PRAY for our pastors and the sermon series, the upcoming group meeting, your teaching, your group members, and their receptivity to the lesson. HIGHLIGHTS > BIBLICAL EMPHASIS: In Colossians 1, Paul encouraged believers to walk worthy of the Lord through patience and endurance in the faith. Paul pointed out in his letter to Timothy that Jesus is our example for this type of patience. Then in 2 Peter 3, we read that God is patient with us, prolonging His return in order to draw more people to Him. > LIFE APPLICATION: Through the apostle Paul s teachings, we learn the importance of patience and endurance in the life of a Christ-follower. When we covenant with our spouse in marriage, we are promising to embody these Christlike qualities for the rest of our lives. Our marriages become models of sanctification. INTRODUCTION As your group time begins, use this section to help get the conversation going. If you were doing premarital counseling for an engaged couple, what would you say is the biggest surprise about being married? What would you tell them has been easier than you imagined? What has been more difficult? How would you try to prepare them for the permanence of marriage? UNDERSTANDING Unpack the biblical text to discover what Scripture says or means about a particular topic. > HAVE A VOLUNTEER READ COLOSSIANS 1:9-12. What two specific things did Paul pray for the Colossians? According to verses 10-12, what is the evidence that we are living lives worthy of God? 1 WE WILL NEVER GIVE UP LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH

DISCUSSION PLAN In what ways do each of these actions bearing fruit, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with His power, and giving Him thanks help to strengthen our marriages? What is the result of these pursuits in our relationship with God (v. 10)? In our ministry as a couple? When we are growing closer to God and walking worthy of Him, all of our relationships reap the benefits, especially our marriages. Our sanctification journey, through both the good and bad times, is most evident to our spouse, the person walking with us through daily life. As we ll read in the next set of verses, Jesus is our model for this kind of Godhonoring, holy living. > HAVE ANOTHER VOLUNTEER READ 1 TIMOTHY 1:15-16. Paul reminded Timothy of the power of the gospel to change lives. The Greek word for gospel is euangelion, which means good message. It s a declaration of God s activity to redeem and restore. Articulate the gospel in your own words. What does the truth of Jesus saving work mean to you? How does it impact your daily life? According to verse 16, why did God have mercy on Paul? How does God s transforming work in Paul s life bring Him glory? How does this affect your own story? Paul pointed out that Christ saved him, the most rotten of the bunch, to showcase the Lord s extraordinary patience toward all other sinners. Paul was the model, the living proof, that Christ can deliver from death and darkness any sinner. The extraordinary patience Jesus demonstrated in drawing Paul to salvation through years of rebellion and persecution on Paul s part is the model for the patience and persistence of the spiritual journey and of our relationships with others. What do you communicate to your spouse when you pursue him/her in the way Christ pursued you? How do we demonstrate that we are patient in and committed to our marriages? How can remaining focused on this trustworthy saying prevent us from growing complacent in our marriages? > HAVE A FINAL VOLUNTEER READ 2 PETER 3:8-9. This last set of verses describe the hope and reward of endurance in the faith. Peter in verses 3-4 was counseling believers regarding the second coming of Jesus to earth. Many had concluded that since Jesus hadn t returned and some who were looking for His return had already died, Jesus was never coming back. 2 WE WILL NEVER GIVE UP LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH

DISCUSSION PLAN Why has God delayed in sending Jesus back to earth? What evidence do you see today that God s timetable and our timetables are different? How should God s example of patience impact our marriages? If you are single, how should the truth of these verses impact your daily life? What should our marriages be dedicated to, in light of this passage? What seems like a delay makes the Lord s return no less certain. Peter noted that God views time differently than human beings do. Christ will return in accordance with the divine timetable, not ours. The Lord has not yet returned, says Peter, because He is patient with us, not wanting any to perish without having a saving relationship with Him. Our marriages give us the opportunity to model God s patience to each other, but we are also called to be partners in the ministry of the gospel, taking advantage of the days God is delaying His return. How does a sense of urgency for Jesus return affect the way we live day to day? Do you live with Paul s sense of urgency for Jesus return? Why or why not? If not, what would change if you lived each day as if Jesus was coming back? APPLICATION Help your group identify how the truths from the Scripture passage apply directly to their lives. How do you see the gospel most evidently displayed in your marriage? Where do you think it should be more evident? What opportunities is God giving you as a couple to be ministers of the gospel? What steps can you take to share the gospel with family? friends? coworkers? What is one thing you can do this week to remind your spouse of your commitment to your marriage? What truth has impacted you the most from our 4-week series on marriage? What will you do in the coming months to apply that truth to your marriage? 3 WE WILL NEVER GIVE UP LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH

DISCUSSION PLAN PRAY For a closing prayer time, split up into married couples or small groups of single adults. Encourage the married couples to spend time in prayer reflecting on the truths that have impacted them the most from our marriage series. Challenge them to renew their commitment to serve each other and God, asking God for specific opportunities to be ministers of His gospel in each other s lives. Encourage the groups of singles to pray for patience and joy in their relationship with God and for specific opportunities to be ministers of the gospel this week. FOLLOW UP Midway through this week, send a follow-up e-mail to your group with some or all of the following information: Questions to consider as they continue to reflect on what they learned this week: How has your spouse been patient with you this week? Have you thanked him or her? How can you show the love of Jesus to your spouse today? How can you and your spouse show the love of Jesus to someone in your life today? A note of encouragement, following up on any specific prayer requests mentioned during your group gathering. The challenge to memorize Colossians 1:9-12. 4 WE WILL NEVER GIVE UP LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH

LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH FROM THIS DAY FORWARD: 4 KEYS TO A GREAT MARRIAGE WE WILL NEVER GIVE UP (COLOSSIANS 1:9-12 ; 1 TIMOTHY 1:15-16 ; 2 PETER 3:8-9) OCTOBER 14, 2012 COMMENTARY COLOSSIANS 1:9-11 Col. 1:9 From the time of Epaphras s report concerning the Colossian believers positive qualities, Paul consistently interceded on their behalf. Paul asked God to fill the believers with the knowledge of His will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding. Knowledge renders the Greek term for full knowledge that comes from a personal relationship with God. Paul stressed that God revealed His will in Christ. The Colossian Christians had partial knowledge of that will; they needed complete knowledge. Wisdom is the grasp of general principles; understanding (insight) is the application of those principles to specific situations making wise decisions. The term spiritual stresses that genuine wisdom and understanding come through the Holy Spirit. Col. 1:10 The purpose of wisdom from God is that believers may walk worthy of the Lord that is, may live in such a manner that their lifestyles honor Christ and reflect His character. Believers Christlike behavior was to be fully pleasing to Him. In attitude, word, and deed, believers were to follow Christ s will for them. With four words conveying continuous action, Paul described what Christlike living involves. First, it is continuously bearing fruit in every good work. Here, fruit refers to gracious deeds of kindness and generosity prompted by God s working in believers lives. Second, believers are to be growing in the knowledge (full knowledge) of God. They are to experience a deepening personal intimacy with God in which they understand and implement more of His character. Col. 1:11 Third, Paul prayed that the Colossian Christians would be strengthened (empowered) by all power. The Greek term rendered power has the sense of God s inherent, unlimited strength or ability available to believers. The phrase glorious might (literally, the might of His glory ) has the sense of God s sovereign strength. God s glory is His character revealed as redemptive love. Thus Paul prayed that the Colossian Christians would go on experiencing the same divine energy that provided salvation. Such God-given strength would enable believers to have endurance and patience to persevere in the face of difficulties without grumbling or retaliating. They could continue to be faithful to Christ with joy solid confidence in His sustaining grace. 1 TIMOTHY 1:12-17 1 Tim. 1:12-14 The gospel of Jesus Christ is not subjective but objective truth revealed by God and recorded in Scripture. It is a fixed body of knowledge on which believers are to take their stand and use to guard against false teachings. The gospel is also good news because Jesus is all-powerful to change peoples sinful lifestyles to righteous ones. Think about Paul himself, whose hate for Christians Christ converted into love. Beginning with verse 12, the hater turned lover shared his personal testimony with Timothy. Paul s powerful statement contrasts the gospel s glory with the emptiness of false teachings misguided preachers tooted and touted. Paul gave thanks to Christ Jesus our Lord for calling him to salvation and ministry. To Paul, God s grace was a marvel, and he never changed his feelings about that. Because of grace alone, Paul was the beneficiary of God s appointing him to ministry. Throughout his years of service, the apostle knew Christ Jesus, and certainly not himself, was the One who kept him strengthened for effective service. From day one of his salvation and call to ministry, Paul lived in the strength his gracious Lord provided. 5 WE WILL NEVER GIVE UP LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH

COMMENTARY Paul was a great sinner. He described himself as the worst of them. In view of his wicked past, the apostle was shocked Christ saved him. Yet for Paul, in spite of his sinful life, the Lord s wonderful mercy and grace super abundantly overflowed on his life. 1 Tim. 1: 15-16 Verse 15 contains the first of the five trustworthy sayings that appear in the Pastoral Letters (see also 3:1; 4:9; 2 Tim. 2:11; Titus 3:8). These sayings were familiar teachings regarding articles of belief deeply cherished and served as confessions in public worship in the first-century church. They provide insights to what matters most for churches and believers today. Paul s trustworthy statement in 1:15 refers to Jesus incarnation, which implies His pre-existence, and His purpose in coming ( to save sinners ), among whom Paul believed he was the worst of them. Paul answered that Christ saved him, the most rotten of the bunch, to showcase the Lord s extraordinary patience toward all other sinners. Paul was the model, the living proof, that Christ can deliver from death and darkness any sinner. No person is beyond His reach of mercy. 1 Tim. 1:17 Paul began his personal testimony with thanksgiving (v. 12) and closed it with a doxology (v. 17). Christ s mercy for Paul, the worst of the worst, filled his heart with praise. He extolled God in four characteristics. First, God is the King eternal, meaning He rules the ages. Second, God is immortal thus invulnerable to weakness, death, decay, and corruption. Third, God is invisible to His people while on earth. We see Him by faith. Fourth, He is the only God. Having no competitors, the Lord is in unique in His glory. Because of His excellences, Paul concluded that the one living God is worthy of honor and glory forever and ever. 2 PETER 3:8-9 Peter wrote in the midst of a daunting task. There were many false prophets among the people (2 Pet. 2:1) whose errors he had to expose. These false teachers denied the imminent return of Christ. This denial drastically affected all who believed it. They lost their zeal and urgency for the gospel. Peter realized this troubling context as he wrote his second letter. He reminded believers that time is not the same to God as it is to humanity. Rather than expecting God to work on our time-table, we must realize that He answers our prayers in His own perfect timing. We must seek to be patient and wait on His timing. While this often is not an easy task, it is important if we are going to discern and live within God s will. In the specific context of this passage, Peter tried to convey this same message to fellow believers. He demonstrated to his audience that it is entirely possible to remain steadfast in the understanding that Christ s return is near, while not seeing immediate evidence of that return. Peter reminded his readers that just because Christ had not already returned did not mean there was a delay in His promise. Rather, He is patient. God is not a God of randomness or chance. He is a God of order and purpose. Peter shed some light on why God had (and has) yet to return: His not wanting any to perish, but all to come to repentance. Any delay in His return provides opportunity for evangelism. 6 WE WILL NEVER GIVE UP LONG HOLLOW BAPTIST CHURCH