Wedding Music Preparation as Ministry to Engaged Couples

Cantors, song leaders, and choirs encourage the congregation to lift their voices in song during the wedding liturgy. The bride had been a member of the choir that sang during the Sunday Mass in which the wedding took place. Photo Michelle Hartman Wedding Music Preparation as Ministry to Engaged Couples Eric J. Bermani Witnessing a couple proclaim their love as they exchange marriage vows often fills participants at the liturgy with hope. When the love that couple shares appears to manifest God s love, our vision of the world is renewed. For liturgical musicians and the clergy, the image of the bride and groom standing before the congregation also conjures a picture of hard work and much preparation time. Ministers who have been involved in even a few weddings understand the stress of dealing with issues surrounding couples who may not have attended Mass in a long while as well as with visiting wedding coordinators and overzealous photographers. Conversations around the importance of the presence of parish music ministry, appropriate music, and the scheduling of the wedding to coordinate with the reception can be trying. Tensions surrounding these concerns can lead liturgical ministers to be apprehensive of weddings. Conflict, though, does not need to be woven into the preparation of the wedding liturgy. While all disagreements may not be eliminated, many of the concerns in preparing the wedding liturgy arise from miscommunication or too little communication. With careful planning, it is possible to avoid much of the anxiety and to share in the couple s joy and enthusiasm. Addressing engaged couples in 2014, Pope Francis stressed the grace that is part of the Sacrament of Matrimony. What happened at Cana two thousand years ago happens in reality at every wedding feast. It is the presence of the Lord who reveals himself and the gift of his grace that will render your marriage full and profoundly true. Parish communities, friends, and family members rejoice as they witness the couple s entrance into a covenant of love. Amid this joy, the Church holds up that the celebration of the sacrament is a liturgical act. It is therefore appropriate that it should be celebrated in the public liturgy of the Church (Catechism of the Catholic Church, 1631). As with 4

other sacraments, a full complement of liturgical music accompanies the rite. Liturgical musicians and parish staff should anticipate celebrating the Sacrament of Matrimony with the same spirit of joy with which they look forward to other sacraments. The preparation of the liturgy and the wedding are, after all, a time for accompaniment of not only the bride and groom but their guests. With attendees from other denominations and faiths, along with Catholics who do not worship regularly, weddings offer many moments for evangelization. 1 These moments provide a key opportunity to welcome the stranger in our midst and engage those who may have fallen away from the Church. In these encounters, we may be afforded the chance to minister to those who may be wounded and searching for healing, reconciliation, and restoration. Thus, the celebration of the wedding liturgy can be viewed through the lens of the New Evangelization. Though parish staff may be circumspect about couples whose Mass attendance is lax, the fact that a wedding in a church means something to them should mean something for us as well. Looking past the challenges and conflicts we face, we can consider the words and actions of Pope Francis. How do you think he would minister to an engaged couple? Focusing on building, strengthening, and nourishing the Body of Christ through the lens of evangelization and catechesis fits with his vision and message. ESTABLISHING A CLEAR POLICY Establishing and making available a clear policy that couples can consult even before contacting the parish is important. This resource, which should be publicized in the bulletin and on the parish website as well as available in the offices of staff, can be key to avoiding early misunderstandings and bypassing uncomfortable situations. Designed to assist the couple navigate the various preparation stages, your parish wedding resource should be definitive yet pastorally flexible. If a parish resource is not yet available, one should be developed in consultation with the pastor and members of the pastoral staff. Many parishes and diocesan offices for worship have such resources, so prior to working on a policy, you will want to see what your colleagues have assembled. This policy should augment other resources, such as Together for Life, by Joseph Champlin, and Celebrating Marriage, by Paul Covino, that the parish uses to assist couples to prepare the wedding liturgy. The Scripture passages, ritual, and prayer texts should be given to the couple in advance so that they may have ample opportunity to pray, reflect, and choose appropriate passages for the wedding liturgy. Realistically speaking, couples are familiar with the need for policies. Caterers, photographers, and wedding event coordinators have supplied them with material that explain their requirements. Though the parish should not see itself as another venue, the necessity for clear communication should be understood. The liturgical celebration of the Sacrament of Matrimony should mirror the celebration of the Sunday Eucharist. Whether the Rite of Marriage is during Mass or outside Mass (Liturgy of the Word), the services of an organist and/or other instrumen- The worship aid should include the parts of the Mass and the postures of the congregation as well as the music during the liturgy. talists, as well as a cantor, should be arranged. Wherever possible, you may even consider the presence of a choir 2 or other vocal ensemble such as a quartet. Instrumental music from a harp, trumpet, flute, or violin is sometimes requested and can beautifully enhance the liturgy. If you have been reticent to integrate varied instrumental music into the parish offerings for weddings, you may want to reconsider this. Gathering descants and the relevant repertoire before the couples ask for these services will save time and energy. Plenty of resources are available for organ and solo instruments and can be quickly found on the Internet and through music publishers such as GIA, World Library Publications, Oregon Catholic Press, and others. Some of my favorite and most utilized resources are The Classical Wedding and The Joyous Wedding, arranged for organ and solo trumpet by Sue Mitchell Wallace and John Head (Hope Publishing), and a collection of wedding music arranged by David Johnson (Augsburg Fortress). To encourage full, active, and conscious participation, a well-designed worship aid should be distributed at the wedding. Providing the couple with a basic template for the participation aid, and perhaps samples, will enable them to put together their own. Assure the couples that you will be a resource to them and that parish administrative assistants will proof the worship aid. Along with the relevant music for the assembly responses and acclamations (copyright permits and licenses should be obtained), the worship aid should indicate when the congregation should sit, stand, and kneel. Citations for the readings should be provided, and if appropriate when a number of attendees primary language is other than English, the translation of the readings. Full participation of the assembly does not preclude the singing of solos. According to Sing to the Lord: Music in Divine Worship, 221, Vocalists may sing alone during the Preparation of the Gifts or after Communion, provided the music and their manner of singing does not call attention to themselves but rather assists in the contemplation of the sacred mysteries being celebrated. Of course, solos of sacred music also may be part of the prelude music. PastoralLiturgy.org 5

Photo Joanna Pach songs that the couple and/or their families know well. Familiarity with music and texts is an important consideration to keep in mind, especially for mixed assemblies. A composition with refrain and verse, such as the proper Entrance Antiphon3 with accompanying psalm verses, also could be utilized. Inclusion of this music in the worship aid would certainly encourage the assembly to participate. No matter the circumstances, be pastoral and sensitive in your conversations with couples while pointing out that the choice and placement of wedding music are based on the liturgical, pastoral, and musical judgments, just as during any liturgy. The same criteria for preparing music for Sunday liturgies is part of preparing the wedding liturgy. 4 Music should reflect the truth that all the sacraments celebrate the Paschal Mystery of Christ.... Songs that are chosen for the Liturgy should be appropriate for the celebration and express the faith of the Church (STL, 220). That secular music is prohibited before, during, and after the liturgy should be stated explicitly in the policy. To help couples understand the reason for using music appropriate to the space, I have used the analogy of playing sacred music during the reception instead of dance music. Again, when a number of options are provided, the couple usually will be able to select music that is appropriate. Keeping in mind that the wedding liturgy is modeled after the Sunday liturgy, altar servers should be utilized, readers should be properly prepared, and extraordinary ministers of Holy If encouraged to process together, as the Rite of Marriage prescribes, couples may opt to do so. Communion should be present, if circumstances warrant. If possible, why not have the crucifer or crossbearer begin the procession of liturgical minismusic FOR THE PROCESSION ters? Be sure to list all options in your wedding resource, since Liturgical ministers should be well versed in the Rite of you may be suggesting an idea or concept that the couple has not Marriage, with an understanding of both forms of the Entrance yet encountered. Rite. Still, we need to be pastorally sensitive to the fact that wedthe clergy, parish musicians, and wedding coordinators ding liturgies take a variety of forms. Many couples expect should be fully versed in the liturgical norms and expectations. All instrumental music during a bridal procession with bridesmaids who minister to the couple should be familiar with the section on and groomsmen. However, couples might be happy to process music for the Rite of Marriage in Sing to the Lord (216 224) as well together during an Entrance Song if introduced to Rite of as the norms for music within Mass (137 199). Be aware that The Marriage, 20: Roman Missal states that if the wedding rite takes place during Mass, the Act of Penitence is omitted and the Gloria is sung or If there is a procession to the altar, the ministers go first, recited (therefore, the prescribed use of the Gloria on Sundays is followed by the priest, and then the bride and the bridefollowed). If the Gloria is sung, a familiar setting should be used to groom. According to the local custom, they may be escorted facilitate the participation of the assembly. by at least their parents and the two witnesses. Meanwhile, For most weddings, the prayers for the Mass are taken the entrance song is sung. from the Ritual Masses for the Celebration of Marriage in The Roman Missal, and the readings proclaimed are those cited in How beautiful it would be to begin the wedding liturgy the Rite of Marriage. Should the wedding occur on a solemnity with a hymn tune or appropriate song that the whole community or another day listed in 1 4 of the Table of Liturgical Days, the sings. Two excellent hymn recommendations would be Hear Us Mass of the day is used, with the Nuptial Blessing in the Mass. If Now, Our God and Father, set to Hyfrydol, and God Who the wedding is during the parish Sunday Mass during Christmas Created Hearts to Love, set to Lasst Uns Erfreuen. But in considtime and Ordinary Time, the Mass of the Sunday is used. The ering the Entrance Song, you would want to review hymns or Rite of Marriage, 11, notes, On the Sundays of the Christmas 6

season and in Ordinary Time, the entire wedding Mass may be used in Masses that are not parish Masses. (For more information, see rubrics in The Roman Missal, Ritual Masses, For the Celebration of Marriage. Also see the Q&A, by Dennis C. Smolarski, sj, in this issue.) Most often, whether the wedding is within or outside of Mass, the readings cited in the Rite of Marriage are proclaimed. When the wedding Mass is celebrated at the parish Mass on a Sunday or solemnity (including the anticipated Mass), at least two of the readings for the day are proclaimed. (Refer to the Rite of Marriage, 11, for the exceptions.) If the wedding is celebrated outside of Mass on a Saturday evening or Sunday, the readings from the Rite of Marriage may be used. Responsorial Psalm options are drawn from the Lectionary.5 The Church has designated Psalms 33 ( The earth is full of the goodness of the Lord ), 34 ( I will bless the Lord at all times ), 103 ( The Lord is kind and merciful ), 112 ( Happy are those who do what the Lord commands ), 128 ( Happy are those who fear the Lord ), 145 ( The Lord is compassionate to all his creatures ), and 148 ( Let all creation praise the name of the Lord ) as particularly suitable for wedding liturgies. In addition, some parishes commonly offer Psalm 117 ( This is the day the Lord has made ). Weddings celebrated at the parish Mass on Sundays or solemnities utilize the proper psalm and Gospel Acclamation. As with any liturgy, compositions that are not psalms should not be used as the proper psalm. Weddings are permitted during Lent, but the season affects the celebration of the wedding. The parish resource providing the policy for weddings should catechize on the meaning of the Lenten season. It should note that, for weddings during Lent, the Alleluia is omitted from the liturgy, the sparse environment of the season is respected (an abundance of flowers and decorations would not be appropriate), and the music should be subdued and reflective of the season. Even if the couple has read the policy, these matters should be pointed out to those planning to marry during Lent. Parishes should keep in mind the pastoral need to follow established policy. When rules are bent for one couple, others will seek the same. Parishes do not want to seemingly send the message that exceptions will be made for some families but not others. The attempt to be pastoral in allowing poor choices can inadvertently bring about an injustice. Confusion also may ensue when exceptions are made and couples question why a practice was allowed at a neighboring parish. Pastoral musicians need to be cognizant that we work in collaboration with fellow parish ministers and are interconnected throughout the diocese. This should underscore the vital importance of music directors maintaining a standard of sacred music, not only for the couples, but for their parish communities and for fellow music ministers. When appropriate options are offered, couples can be dissuaded from a poor choice in a pastoral and professional manner. WORKSHOP ON WEDDING MUSIC To introduce couples to liturgical wedding music and the norms for a wedding, parishes may want to sponsor an annual or semiannual workshop on wedding music, inviting engaged couples to hear and sing music for the wedding liturgy. These evenings can be effective in furthering and deepening liturgical and musical Music for the Wedding Liturgy Celebration of Marriage within Mass Processional Hymn or instrumental Gloria Responsorial Psalm Gospel Acclamation with appropriate versicle Song/Hymn of Praise after Blessing and Exchange of Rings (optional) Chant or hymn during Preparation Rite Sanctus/Holy Mystery of Faith Great Amen Agnus Dei/Lamb of God Communion Chant/Hymn Song of Thanksgiving Recessional Hymn or instrumental Dialogue acclamations with celebrant and assembly Celebration of Marriage outside Mass Processional Hymn or instrumental Responsorial Psalm Gospel Acclamation with appropriate versicle Song/Hymn of Praise after Blessing and Exchange of Rings (optional) [When the sacrament is celebrated outside of Mass but Communion is distributed, a chant or song may accompany the distribution of the sacrament, as well as the period of thanksgiving after Communion is distributed (STL, 223).] Recessional Hymn or Instrumental Dialogue acclamations with celebrant and assembly Wedding Masses taking place on Sunday (including the Mass of anticipation on Saturday) follow readings for the specific Sunday but one reading may be from the Rite of Marriage. Celebration of Marriage outside of Mass taking place on Sunday may utilize the readings from the Rite of Marriage. Mass prayers and celebrant texts are from The Roman Missal and the Rite of Marriage. PastoralLiturgy.org 7

Weddings offer many opportunities to welcome the stranger and engage those who have become lax in the practice of their faith. catechesis. Be certain to begin and end the evening with a prayer, either sung or recited. Involve your cantors, choral ensembles, and your instrumentalists and invite the parish wedding coordinators. The gathering is a pastoral way that engaged couples can hear and see various combinations of musicians and partake in the enhanced liturgical, ritual, and sacred music that will be appropriate for their weddings. During the reception, the music director and others involved in parish music ministry will have the opportunity to meet engaged couples and answer questions. To minister more effectively to engaged couples and others, parishes may want to rethink the way parish musicians are compensated for weddings and funerals. In many parishes, musicians are paid directly by the family, thus bypassing the payroll system in place for weekend liturgies, rehearsals, and musicians salaries. For a variety of reasons (some tax-related), some dioceses have suggested parishes adopt a method whereby the stipends for the musicians are incorporated into the parish s wedding offering. The stipends are then passed on to the musicians along with the necessary deductions, wherever applicable. The benefits of this model outweigh any drawbacks since it eliminates an a la carte mentality to the music ministry, negates the need for the director of music to upsell the services of a cantor and organist, and allows family members and friends who have been formed as cantors, singers, and instrumentalists to participate in the liturgy while, simultaneously, reinforcing the importance of the parish music ministry s presence at these ritual celebrations. Though this approach may require convincing the parish business manager or pastor of its merits and benefits, the time will be well spent. A REVISED RITE US parishes are looking forward to receiving the new translation of the ritual for celebrating the Sacrament of Matrimony. The title of the ritual has changed to The Order of Celebrating Matrimony and will contain additions, such as a new verse and response Let us bless the Lord. / Thanks be to God following the couple s consent. According to the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops Committee of Divine Worship s July 2015 Newsletter, the OCM s introduction has been expanded to include more theological commentary and pastoral instruc- Photo by Karen Callaway tions, which should be beneficial in catechesis and instruction. Like the previous edition, Scripture and psalm passages will be included while Mass texts and prayers will be found in the Missal. The new ritual text will be available August 25. Parishes may begin to use it on September 8, and its mandated use is December 30. The celebration of the Sacrament of Matrimony is indeed a joyful and holy time for the engaged couple and the parish community. It is of the utmost importance for pastoral ministers to rethink the great catechetical and evangelical opportunities that weddings present to us and to the Church. We are called to minister to engaged couples, accept them wherever they may be on their faith journey, and seek to deepen and nourish their understanding of the sacrament. Through this lens of joyful thanksgiving, we are reminded of our call to be constant workers in the vineyard of the Lord. Regardless of our positions within our parish communities, it is our responsibility to be hospitable and charitable as we seek to cooperate with God s grace in building the Kingdom of God one living stone after another. Notes 1. During the October 2015 Synod on the Family, the bishops addressed this topic specifically: Frequently, the celebrant has occasion to address an assembly of people who minimally participate in the life of the Church or who belong to other Christian denominations or other religions. Consequently, this can serve as a valuable opportunity to proclaim the Gospel of the Family, which might prompt, even in the families that are present, a rediscovery of the divine gifts of faith and love. The celebration of a wedding is also a timely occasion to invite many to celebrate the Sacrament of Reconciliation (The Vocation and Mission of the Family in the Church and in the Contemporary World: Instrumentum Laboris, 73). 2. See Oxford University Press Weddings for Choirs for excellent suggestions and recommendations for appropriate choral anthems. 3. See Adam Barlett s Simple English Propers (www.musicasacra.com). 4. Refer to Sing to the Lord, 126, for a review of the judgments. 5. See Lectionary vol. 4. Eric J. Bermani is the music director for the Diocese of Manchester, New Hampshire, and director of music and organist at the Cathedral of Saint Joseph. His ma in church music and liturgy is from St. Joseph College, Rensselaer, Indiana. He is working toward a thd in liturgical praxis and church music at the Boston University School of Theology. At www.pastoralliturgy.org Find and share this article with parish staff and the liturgy committee at the following URL: http://www.pastoralliurgy.org/resources/pdf /WeddingPreparationasMinistrytoEngagedCouples.pdf. 8