And a good day to all our sentient readers out there, (and a big HELLO to all those emerging semisentients who will be able to catch up once their brains have evolved a little more) Today, hot off the presses we meet another crew member of the USS Galaxy, an officer who comes from somewhere you may never have heard of before, but I hope will know a little better once we are done. Today we meet Ensign Tre gata, another of the shadowy Intelligence officers on that fine ship. GOOD MORNING DOUGLAS, OKAY, LET S START WITH A LITTLE INFORMATION ABOUT YOU IF THAT S OKAY, SO, WHAT S YOUR FULL NAME AND DOES IT MEAN ANYTHING? WHO NAMED YOU, OR DID YOU CHOOSE IT? How in the universe would I be able to choose my own name? My parents named me before I was born. My first name is from my father, Douglas Michaels. My last name is from my Man'de'harian mother. Douglas Michael Tre'gata. THERE ARE SOME CULTURES WHERE YOU CHOSE YOUR ADULT NAME ONCE YOU COME OF AGE, HENCE THE QUESTION. YOUR MOTHER IS MAN'DE'HARIAN, I'M NOT FAMILIAR WITH THEM, TELL US ABOUT THEM. Man'de'har, beautiful planet, been warp capable since Earth's mid twentieth century. They allied with the Xenonians, joined their Republic, helped lead the rebellion when the emperor seized control. Our people are much like humans, but we never had a nuclear war. Or eugenics wars. CONGRATULATIONS FOR AVOIDING BOTH. SO HOW OLD ARE YOU? 22 IS THAT YOUNG OR OLD FOR A MAN DE HARIAN? Umm, still quite young. Average Man'de'harians live to around one fifteen, one twenty. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Man'de'har, in the Federation embassy WHAT ARE YOUR PARENTS LIKE? WHAT DO THEY DO? My father was the Federation ambassador to Man'de'har. He just retired. He's a real prick, most of the time, and the rest of the time I don't really pay attention to him. My mother was an attache' to the Federation embassy when my parents met, but for the past fifteen years she has been on the Federation diplomatic staff. She was just brutally murdered at the hands of some really vicious criminals.
I'M SORRY TO HEAR THAT, THEY'VE BEEN CAUGHT I TRUST? Not quite. (Veiled eyes, stone face.) OKAY... ANY OTHER FAMILY? Some older cousins on my father's side, I think they're in Starfleet. Most of my mother's family was killed around the same time she was, and two of my cousins are missing. THEY WERE KILLED AROUND THE SAME TIME, WAS THERE A WAR OR SOMETHING? Um, a bloodthirsty criminal syndicate trying to get even with me for taking out one of their weapon smuggling rings. SO WHERE DID YOU GROW UP? WHAT WAS IT LIKE? I grew up in the Embassy. My parents realized way too late that they had different philosophies in raising children. So, of course, I'm the one that suffered. Man'de'har embraces genetic manipulation to cure disease, but my father, the jerk, hates all genetic manipulation because of those ridiculous eugenics wars your silly planet had, LIKE THREE HUNDRED YEARS AGO!! Anyway, I got to go to lots of cool parties and meet all sorts of aliens. WELL THE FEDERATION HAS HAD SEVERAL BAD EXPERIENCES WITH GENETIC MANIPULATION, THE EUGENICS WERE JUST THE START REALLY, AND OTHERS OBVIOUSLY FEEL THE SAME OR IT WOULDN'T BE 'FEDERATION' LAW, IT'D JUST BE EARTH LAW, I TAKE IT MAN'DE'HAR ISN'T PART OF THE FEDERATION THEN? Yes, but only recently. With the entire Xenonian Rupublic. And some laws are only on the books because people are afraid. AFRAID OF WHAT? Afraid of what others are capable of. The Eugenics laws are on the books because people are afraid that others will abuse genetic engineering, and so they ban it altogether. IT S NOT TOTALLY BANNED IN THE FEDERATION, JUST VERY VERY HEAVILY REGULATED, DID THE MAN DE HARIANS ROUTINLEY USE GENETIC ENHANCEENTS BEFORE JOINING THE FEDERATION THEN? Never enhancements, but modifications. Curing genetic diseases and the like. Enhancements were reserved for parts of the military, but that use was even banned on our planet. In the Federation, you have to have severe birth defects to qualify for genetic modification. On Man'de'har, any genetic abnormality or defect can be repaired legally. It was part of the charter that allowed them in the Federation, as long as they disclosed their methods, and agreed not to use their facilities to treat members of Species belonging to the Federation. ANY SIGNIFICANT OTHERS? ARE THEY WITH YOU ON SHIP? Nope, and nope. I refuse to get emotionally involved with anyone else. Most of my family died because of me, why would I want to put someone else at risk like that? SOUNDS VERY LONLEY THOUGH.
Well, most people get attached to others based on how their partner makes them feel about themself. IF their partner makes them feel good, they stick around. And, more often than not, if their partner makes them feel lousy, they still stick around. People are odd that way. ANY PETS? I hate animals. EVEN TRIBBLES? Especially tribbles. OKAY THEN, MOVING ON, WHY DID YOU DECIDE TO JOIN STARFLEET? HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN IN STARFLEET? I'm not in Starfleet. I'm in the Xenonian High Guard. I'm on an exchange program. I've been in for about seven years, if you count the academy. I joined at fifteen. SORRY, I'LL TRY AND REMEMBER, FIFTEEN, I KNOW SOME PEOPLE HAVE STARTED THE ACADEMY BEFORE EIGHTEEN, BUT IS THAT NORMAL FOR YOUR PEOPLE? It's pretty normal on Man'de'har, and Xenon. In fact, most of the Republic worlds are nearly the same in that. HOW DID YOU LIKE THE ACADEMY? YOU RE ONE ANYWAY. Most of my time at the High Guard Academy was field exercises. For Intelligence operatives, there is an additional two years of school, much of which is also in the field. WHERE ELSE HAVE YOU SERVED? Can't tell you. Classified. SO WHAT DO YOU DO CURRENTLY ON SHIP? SPECIALITY? WHAT MADE YOU PICK THAT I'm an Intelligence analyst, and I didn't pick to work here. I kinda screwed up in a mission that left m y true identity open. My bosses shipped me of here to keep me hidden for a while. YOU SCREWED UP? CAN YOU TELL US ABOUT IT? I had a friend, also a spy, and he was ranked higher in the Syndicate than me. He kept his cover, I got screwed. SO YOU RE NOT EXACTLY HERE BY CHOICE THEN? The idea was that I'd lay low for a while, then they'd bring me back. With the new developments back home, things have changed and I'm going to be here for a while. HAVE YOU FOLLOWED ANY OTHER CAREER PATHS IN THE FLEET? WHY DID YOU SWITCH? Why would I want to do anything else?
ARE YOU HAPPY WHERE YOU ARE? I'm not going to be happy again until I see my mother's murderer with a disruptor hole through his chest. RIGHT... SO ARE YOU AIMING FOR THE BIG CHAIR? WOULD YOU LIKE TO COMMAND A STARSHIP? AND IF YES OR NO, WHY? Uh, no. I'm not the "big chair" type of guy. I like to work alone, and I don't need hundreds of people looking to me when the crap hits the fan. FAIR ENOUGH, HOW LONG HAVE YOU SERVED ON THE GALAXY? About six months, long enough to know it's a pretty screwed up place. My first mission had me on a desert planet, with idiots that thought I brought the ship down, apparently single handedly. What do they teach your enlisted guys at tech school anyway? FROM WHAT I KNOW THEY TEACH THEM A FAIR BIT, AND THERE'S A LOT OF LEARNING ALONG THE WAY, NORMALLY THEY CALL IT LIKE THEY SEE IT, SO WHAT HAPPENED ON THE SHIP, WHY DID IT CRASH THEN? That's the mystery. I don't think that anyone has figured it out yet. We hit some kind of super warp for a minute, then things just started falling apart. I was the new guy, with a different uniform, and fear makes people start blaming very quickly. OUTSIDE OF YOUR DUTIES WHAT DO YOU LIKE DOING? Strategy games. Big, involved ones that take weeks to finish. WHAT S YOUR MOST MEMORABLE MOMENT OF SERVICE ON THE GALAXY? Uh, that would be when I hacked into the sicbay computer and had the big Indian guy have me thrown into the brig. OKAY, YOU SO HAVE TO TELL US MORE. One of the shuttle techs shot me down on the surface. I decided to get even by using the EMH to project a ghostly apparition of myself into his room. Apparently, people were not amused. HOW DID THE INDIAN IN QUESTION TAKE IT? He met me at the door to my quarters with two big security guards. I didn't see freedom for days. WAS IT WORTH IT? In the long run, I believe it was a valuable lesson. I learned something about Starfleet computers, and I gained two very valuable assets along the way. I also have a couple of favors I can call in now. WHAT IS YOUR WORST MOMENT ON THE GALAXY? Uh, same. Except maybe when I saw Commander Corgan naked. That was pretty awful.
NOT YOUR TYPE THEN? No, I like redheads. HOW MANY GALAXY CAPTAINS HAVE YOU SERVED UNDER, AND WHICH WAS YOUR FAVOURITE? AND WHY? Well, I'm on my third in less than six months, and I can't say I've liked any of them, because I haven't really met any of them. A quick hello, welcome to the Galaxy from T'vara, and then she died. Then that counsellor got the job, and frankly, the less I'm around counsellors, the better. I HEAR THAT A LOT, WHAT'S THE PROBLEM WITH COUNSELLORS? They want to know things. About your past, you know, and that's kind of what spies tend to hide the most. We don't tell people anything about ourselves, unless it helps us. DO YOU HAVE ANY UNIQUE OR SPECIAL TALENTS OR ABILITIES YOU D LIKE TO SHARE WITH US? This is a publication, right? Why would I give my enemies any of that kind of information? HENCE WHY I ASKED 'IF YOU'D LIKE TO SHARE', LIKE, CAN YOU SING MAYBE? I don't sing. I don't dance, unless it's for a job. And I don't share. RIGHT, THANKS, SO ANY PET HATES? I hate children. All children. Especially cute little five year olds that puke on me. OKAY, NOT A FAMILY GUY THEN, SO HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF? Is this where I get to say how wonderful and generous I am? How I'm the best thing that ever happened to the Intelligence department? Or should I just tell you that I'm pretty much a jerk, like my father. YOUR CHOICE, WHICH IS TRUE THOUGH? The truth is relative. The truth is, I can be either, or neither. Just depends on what I need it to be in a given day. FAIR ENOUGH, IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE YOU D LIKE TO SHARE WITH US? Can't think of anything. THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME DOUGLAS.