A Journey to emotional Healing

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MODULE #9 Theotherapy FORGIVENESS (MATT. 18:23-35) 1. INTRODUCTION We were created to be loved perfectly. Unfortunately, even in the best situation we are never going to be properly LOVED all the time. This leaves us all in a place of NEED. From our birth, every relationship will be less than PERFECT. We cannot meet the other person s need for love, and our need for love cannot be fully met by them. We all have DEBTS to pay and debts others owe us. The way that we deal with our IOU s is to give and receive forgiveness. 2. WHAT IS FORGIVENESS A definition is: releasing the one whom we FEEL is indebted to us. We give all of our IOU s to the Lord. When we forgive, we release the offender from the moral, but not necessarily from the temporal (of this world), consequences of their SIN. We give up the resentment and anger toward the offender as well as the desire for vengeance. a. Commanded by the Lord And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ s sake hath forgiven you. Ephesians 4:32. b. Forgiveness is an act of our WILL, not just an emotion. c. We reap what we SOW. If you do not FORGIVE men their sins, your FATHER will not forgive your sins. Matthew 6:15. 1

3. THE ROOT OF UNFORGIVENESS IS UNRESOLVED ANGER A. Types of forgiveness: 1. Forgiveness we receive for SALVATION: a. We must see ourselves as SINNERS and not as failures. For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God. Romans 3:23 b. We are born into sin with the NEED to FORGIVE and be forgiven. All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on Him the iniquity of us all. Isaiah 53:6. 2. Forgiveness for daily SINS. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteous. I John 1:9. 3. Forgiveness we extend to OTHERS. And when we stand praying, forgive, if ye have aught against any; that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. Mark 11:25. 4. Forgiveness OTHERS extend to US. 4. HOW TO FORGIVE A. We can only FORGIVE to the degree that we have received forgiveness. 2

1. We must receive forgiveness from GOD. 2. We must extend forgiveness to our BROTHER. 3. We must forgive OURSELF. Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it, Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself. Matthew 22:37-39. B. We can only FORGIVE to the degree that we feel the PAIN of the offense. 1. Time itself does not heal wounds caused by sin. I the Lord thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the farther upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me. Exodus 20:5b. 2. Forgiveness comes from our HEART, not just our heads. Wherefore let him that thinks he stands take heed lest he fall. I Corinthians 10:12. C. We MUST take RESPONSIBILITY for our sins. 1. No matter how much we have been hurt and sinned against, if we don t forgive the offender, we are SINNING ourselves. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent : thou shalt forgive him. Luke 17:4. 2. Many times, we HOLD anger against the Lord. While God certainly does not sin and therefore does not need to be forgiven, we often transfer 3

the anger we have against others or even ourselves to God. We sometimes blame God for the bad things that happen to us. God understands our misdirected anger and is willing to help us work through it. Confessing our anger to Him is a way of coming clean and also opens the door for Him to show us the root of our anger as well as the truth that will set us free. D. We will have a NEED for receiving and giving forgiveness until the day we die. 4

Name: Lesson Number: (9) Forgiveness Date: STUDY QUESTIONS: 1. How do we deal with our IOU s? 2. What is the root of unforgiveness? 3. What are some types of forgiveness? 4. What are four things we must do to forgive? 5. Forgiveness must come from our not just our heads. 6. Can you really forgive without touching the pain of the offense? 5

7. Can you think of some people that you thought that you forgave but still need to forgive more? Much time the Lord leads us to forgive people we think we have already forgiven. This is because forgiveness comes in layers. The Lord will not require more of us than we can bear. Can you remember someone who you need to forgive, or forgive at a deeper level? 8. I choose to let off the hook. 9. I release and myself from the bondage of unforgiveness. 10. Write a forgiveness letter to one of them. Do not send the letter (use as much as you need.) Dear, I remember when As a result I felt I began to think (or believe) 6

Today I am making a decision to forgive you through the death and blood of Jesus Christ, just as HE has forgiven me. With this I am letting go of and am asking God to heal the wounds and lies I have believed as a result. Signed Date COMMENTS OR CONCERNS: RESPONSE TO COMMENTS OF CONCERNS: Upon completion of these study questions please mail them to: Marcus Odom, GLF-President RMSI / 387496 / 6B-109 Nashville, Tennessee 37209 7