PARENT GUIDE FOR THE PREPARATION OF PENANCE FIRST RITE FOR RECONCILIATION

PARENT GUIDE FOR THE PREPARATION OF PENANCE FIRST RITE FOR RECONCILIATION

FOREWORD The Sacramental Policy of the Archdiocese of Brisbane Christian Initiation for Children states: Christian Initiation incorporates us into Christ and forms us into God s people. PENANCE 5. Introducing children to the greatness of God s mercy in the Sacrament of Penance is a two-step process. A simple celebration of the rite of the Sacrament of Penance is included as a part of the preparation for First Communion. 6. In the year when the children turn ten (Year Five), they are prepared to celebrate more fully the Sacrament of Penance with individual confession and absolution (the first rite). This builds on the work of the previous year as they take the second step and learn in greater detail what it means to examine their conscience. 8. It is a collaborative process: parish-based, family-centred and school-supported. 14. A parish program of sacramental preparation should provide opportunities for prayer and reflection, activities and discussion. It may, for example, take place over a four-week period within the family or in parish groups, though the time could be longer. It will need to be preceded by some support and resourcing of the parents. With this in mind, Evangelisation Brisbane has prepared a program for preparation of Penance which is made up of four sessions: Christian Life Choices Forgiveness Sacrament of Penance First Rite For Reconciliation To support the implementation of the program Evangelisation Brisbane has produced: A Parish Guide A Parent Guide A Children s Passport (activity book) The Parent Guide invites you, as parents, into conversation with your children and shares with you what the children experienced in their sessions and what you can do with them at home. Families are encouraged to set up a prayer space at home. Included in each session is a take home symbol for the children: 1. Christian Life a tea light 2. Choices a river rock 3. Forgiveness a prayer card 4. Sacrament of Penance scripture card What parents will need to prepare for each session: Session 1 Read the Background Information for the session Help your child set up a prayer space in your home Watch the video of Archbishop Mark Coleridge Watch the video for this week - How are you a disciple of Jesus? Read Family Sharing Time Session 2 Read the Background Information for the session Read Family Sharing Time Session 3 Read the Background Information for the session Read Family Sharing Time Watch the video for this week Forgiveness Session 4 Read the Background Information for this session Read Family Sharing Time

CHRISTIAN LIFE SESSION 1 Background Information for parents Each of us is created in the image and likeness of God (Genesis 1:27). When we are baptised we become brothers and sisters of Christ, entering into a personal relationship with God. As children of God we have a mission to live as peacemakers committed to justice. In the way we live our lives, our choices and actions can either contribute to or be in conflict with the happiness of ourselves and of others. As we are all members of God s family and made in God s image and likeness we have a responsibility to treat one another with respect. Our relationships should be built upon the qualities of trust, care, forgiveness and honesty. This is what the children experienced in their session The children explored: Their understanding that they are a fully initiated Christian, meaning they are: Incorporated into the body of Christ at Baptism Sealed with the gift of the Holy Spirit at Confirmation Fed at the table of the Lord at Eucharist Their identity who they are in God What it means to love God and to love others The gifts of the Holy Spirit Wisdom helps us judge things in the way that God does Understanding helps us to understand all that God has told us Counsel (or Right Judgement) helps us to know what to do especially when faced with really difficult situations Fortitude (or Courage) gives us the strength to do what is right no matter how hard it is Knowledge lets us see the world as it really is Piety (or Reverence) helps us love God and our neighbour as we really should Fear of the Lord (or Awe and Wonder) helps us to remember the greatness of God and helps us not offend God who loves us unconditionally Respectful relationships Respect is about valuing people, including people who are like us and those who are different from us Everyone has the right to feel safe, to be treated with fairness, to be valued, and to feel accepted for who they are Respectful relationships help us to feel safe, encouraged, trusted, and comfortable, that we matter, that it s okay to be honest and open, listened to, equal and treated fairly, valued, understood, and accepted. 3

This is what you can do at home Passport page 2 As your child completes this page, talk about your memories of these special days. You might look at photos or videos, talk about who was there, how you celebrated. Passport page 3 Here you will find a list of scripture passages which will help your child s faith development and understanding of the sacrament of Penance. Set aside time to read and discuss some of these passages together. If you do not have a bible, www.biblegateway.com is a good site to access. We suggest using the NRSVCE (New Revised Standard Version Catholic Edition). Matthew 5:13-16 You are the salt of the earth. You are the light of the world Exodus 20:1-17 The Ten Commandments Luke 15:1-7 The Parable of the Lost Sheep Luke 15:8-10 The Parable of the Lost Coin Luke 15:11-24 The Parable of the Prodigal Son Psalm 51:10 God, help me to change my ways Psalm 119:105 God s word leads my way Luke 10: 30-37 Jesus tells us we must show mercy to all, even those people we don t like Luke 19:1-10 Jesus came to find and save sinners like us Passport page 4 This is an independent activity but you may find a time to have a chat with your child about how your family members use their gifts of the Holy Spirit with each other and with other people. Passport page 5 This is an independent activity; you may like to read Matthew 5:13-16 and then chat to your child about respectful relationships and how they let their light shine with family, friends, and the community. Family Sharing Time 4 Invitation to share: Ask your child to share with you the symbol they received during the ritual at the end of the group session. They may like to explain what happened during the ritual. Pray together: Pray the prayer Jesus gave us: Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name; thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us; and lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen Your child s candle can be added to the prayer space or put somewhere special as a reminder that they are fully initiated Christians who are filled with the Holy Spirit, which can be shared with others.

SESSION 2 CHOICES Background Information for parents Conscience a deep inner awareness of right and wrong, of principles which are meant to govern behaviour, and a sense of the degree to which our thoughts and our actions are in harmony. Conscience is our true inner voice. Why is it important? Because through it we respond to God s call to be the person God made us to be. The only way we can understand who we are called to become is through our conscience, where our life experiences, our standards, and our serious reflection shape our understanding, our knowledge and our choices. How do we form our conscience? It is a life time process, beginning with the morality taught by our parents and teachers; with teaching and stories from our Christian tradition and scripture; with insights gleaned from our culture; our own best experience, and, positively or negatively, from interactions with our peers. Free will is something God gives us, so we have to be careful that we know what is right and what is wrong. Sin is a deliberate choice to do wrong. Sin is before all else an offence against God, a rupture of communion with God. Sometimes we make mistakes which can have a negative effect on ourselves or on someone else. This is not sin. We make choices all the time. Some are everyday choices like what to wear, or what to have for breakfast. These choices do not hurt others. Some choices we make throughout a day do affect other people, the way we act towards them and the way we act to God. Disciples of Jesus choose to right by themselves and others. We use our conscience to help us make these choices. We all need support in making positive choices and maintaining respectful relationships. This is what the children experienced in their session The children looked back at their actions and discerned what their choices show about them as a disciple of Jesus. The children explored: What conscience is and why it is important Their understanding of Church teachings and how they can be guided to make choices in their everyday lives Their choices (positive and negative) and how they can develop a better understanding of the effect of their choices by looking at the ripple effect of a stone being dropped into water, comparing this to the ripple effect of their choices 5

The process of See, Judge, Act as a way of reading and responding to a situation See: Carefully and intentionally examining a situation. What are the people in this situation doing, feeling, and saying? What is happening to them and how do you/they respond? Children shared a situation that happened in their life recently (could be from school, sport, club or family). They asked themselves What happened? Who was involved? Who was being affected? What did I do and why? Judge: The word judge is used here in a positive sense to analyse the situation and make an informed judgement about it. (This is where your conscience, your inner voice, is talking to you). The children asked themselves Was the situation good or bad? Was their choice, their action right or wrong? How do they feel about the situation? What would Jesus have done? How did the situation make them feel? How do they think others felt? Act: Planning and carrying out actions aimed at transforming the social structures that contribute to suffering and injustice. What exactly would they like to change? What actions are they going to take now, or if this happens again? How might that change the situation? Who can they involve to help them in their action? What may make them a better person? This is what you can do at home Passport page 6 This is an independent activity but you may like to chat about choices, conscience, the ripple effects of our positive and negative choices. Passport page 7 As your child completes this page with you, talk about the process of See, Judge, Act and how our actions can build up or break down relationships. Passport page 8 This is a copy of the Ten Commandments in simple language for the children to understand. You may choose to talk as a family about how the Ten Commandments are a guide for living as a disciple of Jesus. Ten Commandments 1. Put God first. 2. Worship only God. 3. Say God s name with love and respect. 4. Keep Sunday special day of prayer, rest and fun with family and friends. 5. Love and respect your parents and carers. 6. Take care of all living things: people, animals and plants. 7. Be faithful to the person to whom you make a commitment in marriage. 8. If it is not yours, do not take it. 9. Always tell the truth. 10. Be happy with what you have. Do not wish for other people s things. 6

Passport page 9 This is an independent activity but you may like to chat to your child about how we can use the Ten Commandments as a guide to making positive choices about our actions. Passport page 10 Awareness Examen The Examen is a technique of prayerful reflection on the events of the day. The Examen is an ancient practice in the Church that can help us see God s hand at work in our daily living. St. Ignatius Loyola thought that the Examen was a gift that came directly from God, and that God wanted it to be shared as widely as possible. It s a habit that Jesuits, and many other Christians, practice to this day. My Day: Take a moment to close your eyes and remember the day... 1. Ask God for Light. (Psalm 119:105 Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path) Talk to God about your day. 2. Give thanks. What are you grateful for today? Thank God for this. 3. Review the day. What disappointed you today? Speak to God about this. 4. Consider your choices. Guided by the Holy Spirit, think about your choices today, is there something you need to say sorry for and ask for God s help 5. Look toward the day to come. Being a disciple of Jesus, how can you use your gifts in the day ahead? Give thanks to God in your own words. Family Sharing Time Invitation to share: Ask your child to share with you the symbol they received during the ritual at the end of the group session. They may like to explain what happened during the ritual. Pray together: Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit: As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end. Amen Your child s river rock can be added to the prayer space or put somewhere special as a reminder that their choices, whether they are positive or negative, have a ripple effect. 7

SESSION 3 FORGIVENESS Background information for parents Reconciliation - The peace of mind and soul which this sacrament imparts to us is one for which there is no substitute. It is a peace that flows from a certainty, rather than from an unsure hope, that our sins have been forgiven and that we are right with God. True reconciliation can only happen when a person is truly sorry and the other forgives. Being Sorry, is feeling sorrow, regret or penitence. It is also feeling sympathy or disappointment, especially because something unpleasant has happened or been done to someone or something. We say sorry when we regret a choice we made which hurt someone else. Repentance and forgiveness are two sides of the same coin. In order to repent, a person who hurt another must show concern for their victim; in order to forgive; the victim must show concern for the person who hurt them. In either case, as disciples of Jesus, we are called to show mercy in giving and receiving forgiveness. Forgiveness is an important aspect of Jesus ministry. Jesus forgives sins and calls us to one life. The difficulties we experience in forgiving those who hurt us and in asking forgiveness of those we have offended remind us of our weakness. Forgiving is not always easy. It does not mean accepting bad behaviour. It means letting go of negative feelings. If we get lost in our faith, or make a bad choice which has a negative ripple effect on others, or indeed sin, God never stops looking for us. It takes courage to trust in God, who like the father in the Parable of the Prodigal Son, is always looking for us to come home. Sin can be personal or communal, i.e. it harms humanity. Examples of this are Indigenous, environmental and social sin. Parables The Gospels frequently describe Jesus teaching in parables. A parable is a literary form that uses a fictional story to make a point. This is what the children experienced in their session The children looked at what it means to forgive others and to forgive themselves, and ultimately what it means to ask for and receive God s forgiveness. The children explored: Times they have forgiven someone and times they have been forgiven The impact of saying sorry and asking for forgiveness Ways in which we show God we are sorry and how to seek forgiveness from God Video The children watched a video of teenagers speaking about forgiveness and what it means to them. When we are faced with asking for forgiveness, or forgiving others, we go through a process: Conversion (a change of heart), leads to Repentance (asking for forgiveness), which leads to Forgiveness (the act of forgiving someone). 8

Scripture The children listened to three parables from the Gospel of Luke. Each parable was about something or someone who is lost. Lost is not always about being missing. It can be that we have lost our way through our choices. Luke 15: 1-7 Luke 15: 8-10 The Parable of the Lost sheep The Parable of the Lost Coin Luke 15: 11-24 The Parable of the Prodigal Son Most people can identify with the frustration, fear and loneliness that come from being lost. The positive is that most people can identify with being found. What a wonderful feeling it is to finally see someone we know or something familiar to us. Reconciliation The children discussed Kevin Rudd s 2008 apology to the indigenous people of Australia. This speech is a very real example that saying sorry is the first step forgiveness and reconciliation can take much longer. The children also talked about how things happen in our lives that are not our fault, like what has happened in Australia s history, and some things that may happen in our family, like parents separating. This is what you can do at home Passport page 11 This is an independent activity but you may like to chat about Conversion (a change of heart), which leads to Repentance (asking for forgiveness), which leads to Forgiveness (the act of forgiving someone). Passport page 12 This is an independent activity but you may find this a useful tool to use when thinking and reflecting on situations at home. Passport page 13 This is an independent activity but you may talk about how your family can answer the call to action. Family Sharing Time Invitation to share: Ask your child to share with you the symbol they received during the ritual at the end of the group session. They may like to explain what happened during the ritual. Pray together: Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world, have mercy on us. Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world, have mercy on us. Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world, grant us peace. Offer each other Sign of Peace. 9

SESSION 4 SACRAMENT OF PENANCE - FIRST RITE FOR RECONCILIATION Background Information for parents We all need to ask for and to give forgiveness during our lives. Negative choices, which impact on ourselves and other people, separate us from God and our communities. Jesus revealed to us a God who is merciful and compassionate. Through preparation for the sacrament of Penance the children are brought to a better understanding of God s mercy, so that they may confess their sins and receive forgiveness in the first rite of Reconciliation. Children are encouraged to write a Prayer of Sorrow or Act of Contrition. This is what the children experienced in their session As disciples of Jesus, the children: explored the sacrament of Penance and how it can bring them back to right relationship with God looked back at key elements of their preparation as they prepare for the sacrament of Penance They revisited the process of Reconciliation: Conversion sorrow for our sins; a desire to change our ways; to do something that will keep us in right relationship with others and God if the same or similar situation occurs. Repentance asking for forgiveness and, Forgiveness the act of forgiving someone. The children selected a scripture passage to help them prepare for the sacrament of Penance. The children then wrote their own Prayer of Sorrow also called Act of Contrition in their passport. The first Rite for Reconciliation The children looked at what happens during the first Rite for Reconciliation. Watch the Penance video together on the Flame of Faith website http://flameoffaith.org.au/penance/ PREPARATION Before celebrating the Sacrament of Penance you need to prepare yourself, to examine your conscience. Pray to the Holy Spirit for guidance to help you know and understand the ways you sin and where in particular you need God s forgiveness. 10 CELEBRATION The priest welcomes you When it is your turn, go to the priest. You may sit or kneel to talk to the priest. He will welcome you and pray the Sign of the Cross with you.

The Word of God To help you to understand and know God s mercy, the priest will share with you a reading from Scripture. Confession Tell the priest the sins you thought and prayed about in your Examination of Conscience. The priest will talk to you about how you can change your ways. He will then give you a penance this is a prayer or action to help you change. Prayer of Sorrow / Act of Contrition The priest will ask you to pray a prayer of sorrow to tell God you are sorry for your sins. You can use the prayer you wrote or the following prayer. O my God, I am sorry that I have sinned against you, because you are so good, and with your help I will not sin again. Absolution You will receive God s forgiveness and peace as the priest prays and makes the Sign of the Cross over you. Through the ministry of the Church, may God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen Prayer of Praise The priest finishes with a short prayer of thanks and praise to God. PRAYER AND ACTION Your Penance Remember to do your penance as soon as possible. This is what you can do at home Passport page 10 Check your child finished writing their Prayer of Sorrow/ Act of Contrition during the session. You may like to talk about the importance to us, as disciples of Jesus, to pray for forgiveness. Family Sharing Time Invitation to share: Ask your child to share with you the scripture they received during the ritual at the end of the group session. They may like to explain what happened during the ritual. Pray together: O my God, I am sorry that I have sinned against you, because you are so good, and with your help I will not sin again. 11