Last week i encountered a car accident. The driver who was at fault seemed remorseful. So I took it upon my self to talk to this poor fellow.

Similar documents
Step 1 Pick an unwanted emotion. Step 2 Identify the thoughts behind your unwanted emotion

HIGHER RIGHTS OF AUDIENCE ASSESSMENT IN RESPECT OF CIVIL PROCEEDINGS THE PRACTICAL ASSESSMENT TRIAL BUNDLE FOR MINI-TRIAL

Disciplined 2 Samuel 24:1-25 August Jim Armstrong (All quotations are from the NASB.)

Seventy Times Seven Program No IT IS WRITTEN SPEAKER: JOHN BRADSHAW

the confirmation, the celebration of all the personal work we ve been doing or should have been doing over the past 40 days, from the beginning of

Introduction Session 2: Heat God Understands My Situation God Enables Me to Grow in Response to My Situation

Socrates: Are you saying, then, that making it more difficult to get a gun will have no impact on shootings in the U.S?

How can I get through. my grief? Looking Deeper

Surrender: Relationship Fundamentals Text: 1 Peter 3:8-12 Care and Bridging Pastor Dan Slagle

Modal verbs of obligation. LEVEL NUMBER LANGUAGE Beginner A2_1057G_EN English

RelationSLIPS Part Six: Crucial Conversations By F. Remy Diederich Cedarbrook Church

Be a Star Part 3 2/1/09 1 Corinthians 13:4-7; 1 Thessalonians 5:12-22

Difficult CONVERSATIONS OUTLINE February 2012

Why Does God Allow Suffering?

How to Grieve with People Who Have Lost a Loved-One. what to do when you don't know what to do

1. LEADER PREPARATION

I Spy God on the Move: Standing Tall, Falling Hard 1 Samuel 8

Real Change. Andrew Nicholls & Helen Thorne BECOMING MORE LIKE JESUS IN EVERYDAY LIFE. Study Guide with Leader s Notes. EDITOR David Powlison

EDITORIAL NOTE: NO SUPPRESSION APPLIED. IN THE DISTRICT COURT AT KAIKOHE CRI [2016] NZDC THE QUEEN DANYON HATI

ACCURATE BELIEFS AND SELF-TALK

Jesus: The Manifestation of the Holy Spirit. Excerpts from the Workshop held at the Foundation for A Course in Miracles Temecula CA

Introduction. Love is a Person. God s love will change you. We love because He first loved us (1 John 4:19).

Creative Responsibility

The Text That Saved My Life. By: Jackie Boratyn. State University watching the all-state theater performance of some musical; a show that even to

Anger Management 1 Samuel 25:1-44

Does God really answer prayer?

MODULE 13: AWAKENED RELATIONSHIPS

THE GOSPEL-CENTERED LIFE PARTICIPANT S GUIDE

Prayer Basics. Adults

True Empathy. Excerpts from the Workshop held at the Foundation for A Course in Miracles Temecula CA. Kenneth Wapnick, Ph.D.

Bathsheba. Prayer Focus. 2 Samuel 11:1-12:25. Make notes on the following: Her character. Her sorrow/heartache. Her joy/redemption

Sermon: Being Strong in Faith Never give up

Names are pretty important

action movie. I got the feeling that he was not at my home for a friendly visit. He was standing in the cold, rubbing his hands together waiting for

The First Eight Words: Elevator Speeches

Relevance. Premises are relevant to the conclusion when the truth of the premises provide some evidence that the conclusion is true

No Fear and No Good! Scripture Text: Romans 3:9-20"

- which means that between now and November, we will be flooded with negative political ads. - Oh - people will complain about how awful

Excerpts from Getting to Yes with Yourself

WITH PATIENCE Live Fully Dr. George O. Wood

Law of Attraction Basic Certification Course Book 1 Steve G. Jones Dr. Joe Vitale

MINISTRY IN THE FACE OF MENTAL ILLNESS

also that there are three requirements; belief, desire, and mental imaging; which need to be met

We are called to serve. And to serve everyone.

25 Then the kingdom of heaven will be like this. Ten bridesmaids took

Downloaded from

Emotional Self-Regulation Skills

The text for this sermon, the theme of which is, I AM... the Way, Truth. going. Thomas said to Him, Lord, we do not know where You are going.

Stand with Humility. What s your typical game plan for navigating high-stakes situations? QUESTION 1 BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 105

Are We Prepared for Relationships?

1. There is... coffee on the shelf A. any B. a few C. some D. a lot. 2. We don t have... milk A. any B. some C. a few D. many

Is it ever OK to not be ok?

Sermon: "A Word for Anxious People" First Presbyterian Church of Kissimmee, Florida Dr. Frank Allen, Pastor 10/13/02 AN ANXIOUS DAY

Know your husband may not be okay with the changes you are about to implement.

Psalm 95 reminds us that everything belongs to the Lord. The depths of the sea are his, as are the tip tops of the mountains.

See It and Say It Helpful Diagrams in Counseling Pastor Brad Bigney / Grace Fellowship Church. Getting Started

The grace that sparks life Ephesians 2:1-10

Lesson 1: Relationship Principles 1

The way I relate to the

Facing Your Problems

TUNED IN - FORGIVENESS

MY PART IN THIS RELATIONSHIP ( What do I bring to my relationship? )

Series: The Keys To A Blessed Life

Mr Vibrating: Yes I did. Man: You didn t Mr Vibrating: I did! Man: You didn t! Mr Vibrating: I m telling you I did! Man: You did not!!

Law of Attraction Basic Certification Course Book 3 Steve G. Jones Dr. Joe Vitale

STAND WITH HUMILITY. What animal would represent your typical approach to dealing with conflict? QUESTION #1 BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 105

A Course In Miracle Workbook For Dummies

Mental Assent Or Weak Faith? Romans 14:01d. Sermon Transcript by Rev. Ernest O'Neill

Week Three January 21, 2018 Moving Forward in Our Character, Part 1

The Prodigal Son September 24, 2017 Rev. Melanie Homan

Do you wonder WHY ANSWERS TO TOUGH QUESTIONS

The First Word FROM FIRST PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH OF BONITA SPRINGS SERMON BY REV. DOUG PRATT JANUARY 10, 2016 COMMUNION MEDIT ATION

The People-Pleasing Project Manager; Why Nice Guys Make Terrible Project Leaders

Overcoming Fear and Rejection. Midweek Instruction Reid Temple AME Church Pastor Washington

The Commands of Christ. Sermon # 7. Going the Second Mile. Matthew 5:38-48

I. So, let s start this off again with that Joyful song.

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Genesis 1:1 (NKJ)

Before You Hit Send Pastor Joe Oakley GFC

Days Are Breath Job 3: 1-10; 4:1-9; 7: 11-21

BONUS MINISTRY IN THE FACE OF MENTAL ILLNESS 132 BONUS SESSION LifeWay

STAND WITH HUMILITY. What animal would represent your typical approach to dealing with conflict? QUESTION #1 BIBLE STUDIES FOR LIFE 105

Suicide. 1. Rationality vs. Morality: Kagan begins by distinguishing between two questions:

I praise you because I, (insert your name), am and made; your works are, I know that full well. (Psalm 139:14, NIV).

INTERPERSONAL EFFECTIVENESS

The Wellbeing Course. Resource: Managing Beliefs. The Wellbeing Course was written by Professor Nick Titov and Dr Blake Dear

lines that divide, all of them, crying out, Come, lay your hands on her, that she may live.

BE THE CHURCH: FORGIVE OFTEN Matthew 18:21-35

B R U M C I d e n t i t y T h e m e s # 2 : acceptance Rev. Brent Wright Broad Ripple UMC

Sermon by Rev. Sage S. Rohrer November 13, 2005 The Swedenborgian Church of San Francisco

Home Base. Luke 15: Preached by Dr. Robert F. Browning, Pastor. First Baptist Church. Frankfort, Kentucky. February 25, 2018

Second Baptist Church of Doylestown. Bible Study Notes: Book of James 1 /25/1 7. James Chapter 1

The Problem of Evil Chapters 14, 15. B. C. Johnson & John Hick Introduction to Philosophy Professor Doug Olena

Maybe if Judas Had Hung-in There... [Text - Acts 1:15-26] Pastor Dave Shackle May 17, 2015

Breast Cancer and the Mind/Body Thing

nature of love. Man rejected God, man had to restore that relationship. That was achieved through Jesus Christ.

Uncommon: Courage (John 2:13-22) Chris Altrock 4/5/15 Easter Sunday

INDIVIDUAL OR SMALL-GROUP STUDY GUIDE

Chapter 6. Waiting It Out

Genesis 50: Hard Core Forgiveness. Sunday November 24, Rev. Susan Cartmell. The Congregational Church of Needham

20 January 2019 St. Athanasius Lutheran Church. Jesu Juva. Those People Text: John 2:1-11; Isaiah 62:1-5; 1 Corinthians 12:1-11

Transcription:

Road Rage By Socrates How can people deal with real life situations with wisdom? This question is at the heart of the stoic philosophy and is a natural extension to my own search for wisdom. I have maintained that philosophy should be available to the people rather than remaining with the gods. It is the art of living. So in addition to interrogating people about values, justice, and ethics, I like examine their response to life issues. I am not a teacher, but through dialogue I hope to help people learn how to question their own lives. Last week i encountered a car accident. The driver who was at fault seemed remorseful. So I took it upon my self to talk to this poor fellow. SOCRATES: Greetings, I am Socrates. I am a new inhabitant of this fine city. This is quite a scene. Was anyone hurt? HARVEY: No, thankfully, we are all fine. Our cars are a mess though. I m Harvey. I can tell you re not from around here your accent, and strange fashion sense gave it away. SOCRATES: Yes, people often find my lack of interest in fashion to be unusual. It is most fortunate that no-one was hurt. These cars do indeed look a mess. What happens next? HARVEY: I wait. I ll never make it to work today now. I need to wait for the tow truck to collect my car. Then there is insurance to deal with. I think I ll need to talk to the police again too. They ve already talked to me, but they said they d come back over after they have talked to the witnesses. My day is a write off, so is my car. I have just phoned my boss to let him know I ll not be at work today. SOCRATES: Do you mind if I talk with you? I have no work and nothing but time on my hands. I may be able to help in some way.

HARVEY: Sure. Why not? SOCRATES: You have mentioned work a couple of times. Is that important to you? HARVEY: Of course it is. I really need to be at work. The reason this damn accident happened is because I was going to me late for work. SOCRATES: Forgive the ignorance of this old man, but how this be so? How can your workplace start time be the cause of a traffic accident? HARVEY: It s obvious, isn t it. The traffic was slow. Endless traffic jams held me up. This meant I was going to be late for work. Now I ll never get there. SOCRATES: I understand that a delay in traffic can lead to you being late for work. But I am not clear on how the accident resulted from this. HARVEY: Don t you see? I drove recklessly. That s how. SOCRATES: Let us work through this so that I may learn how your workplace start time can lead to reckless driving. You said the traffic was not flowing well, which meant you would be late for work, is that right? HARVEY: Yes. SOCRATES: You may be surprised to know, my fine fellow, that there is reasoning behind your thinking. You have made a logical deduction: P1. (Premise) If the traffic doesn t flow smoothly, I ll be late for work P2. (Premise) The traffic isn t flowing smoothly C1. (Conclusion) Therefore, I ll be late for work (from P1, P2) I can see that the traffic here is not flowing smoothly especially with the emergency vehicles parked up around the accident. Was it not flowing smoothly earlier?

HARVEY: That s what I said. SOCRATES: Why do you think you d be late for work? HARVEY: Because I leave home at 8am, I need to be at work at 8:30am, and in this traffic it is bound to take at least 50 minutes. So it s really obvious. SOCRATES: I see. Is today busier than normal? HARVEY: No. It s always like this. I always end up having to take risks to get to work in time. SOCRATES: Again, forgive my ignorance, but if it is always like this, then why not leave home at 7:40? HARVEY: I really shouldn t have to spend 50 minutes in traffic to get to work when I live so close. SOCRATES: When you use the word shouldn t it sounds like you think there is a way the world should be. HARVEY: You re damn right. The traffic should flow smoothly. SOCRATES: I m not so sure. Some people say that only the gods decide how the world should be. Others say that forces of nature beyond the control of individuals determine how the world is. In the case of traffic, it seems to me that there are so many factors involved that it is implausible to expect it to be a certain way. The world doesn t tend to conform to our wishes. But we do have wishes, nonetheless. You wish the traffic would flow smoothly. That is your preference. HARVEY: Yes it is. SOCRATES: But often reality doesn t match our preferences, does it? HARVEY: (sigh) Sadly, no.

SOCRATES: Tell me, why does it matter if you are late to work? HARVEY: I can t just turn up to work whenever I want. I need to be there on time. If I m late, my boss will be angry and I ll be behind schedule all day. SOCRATES: I see, and due to the traffic you have already deduced that you will be late, so your conclusion is that your boss will be angry and you will be behind schedule all day. Your argument now looks like this: P1. (Premise) If the traffic doesn t flow smoothly, I ll be late for work P2. (Premise) The traffic isn t flowing smoothly C1. (Conclusion) Therefore, I ll be late for work (from P1, P2) P3. (Premise) If I m late for work, my boss will be angry and I ll be behind my schedule all day C2. (Conclusion) My boss will be angry and I m going to be behind my schedule all day (from C1, P3) HARVEY: Exactly. Now you understand. SOCRATES: Not quite. Are you sure your boss will be angry? Is there another way to look at things? HARVEY: I don t think so. He is strict. SOCRATES: You don t think it is possible that your boss might sympathize with your unfortunate traffic problems and offer to help with your scheduled work? HARVEY: Haha. Unlikely. I ve seen him get angry with people for being late and I see no reason why he would be more lenient with me.

SOCRATES: Perhaps I should one day visit your boss. I would very much like to understand his thoughts. But I am now here with you, so it is your thoughts that interest me most. HARVEY: This is worse than the police interrogation that I endured a few minutes ago. SOCRATES: Shall we stop? HARVEY: No. I find it strangely useful to talk at the moment. SOCRATES: Dialogue can be very useful. We are social beings that like to talk. You said that your boss will be angry if you re late. Isn t it his decision how he reacts to your lateness. You can t do anything about what he thinks, so why should it bother you? HARVEY: It s quite simple, Socrates. I can t just ignore the possibility that he will be angry. If my boss gets angry with me for being late, it will be because he thinks I m worthless and he might fire me. That would be the worst thing that could happen to me. SOCRATES: Well done, Harvey. You have identified the fourth premise in your reasoning. And given the logic of your deduction, I believe we have the conclusion. Shall we review your argument: P1. (Premise) If the traffic doesn t flow smoothly, I ll be late for work P2. (Premise) The traffic isn t flowing smoothly C1. (Conclusion) Therefore, I ll be late for work (from P1, P2) P3. (Premise) If I m late for work, my boss will be angry and I ll be behind my schedule all day C2. (Conclusion) My boss will be angry and I m going to be behind my schedule all day (from C1, P3)

P4. (Premise) If my boss is angry with me, he must think I m worthless and might fire me, and that would be the worst thing that could happen to me C3. (Conclusion) My boss will think I m worthless and might fire me, and that would be the worst thing that could happen to me (feelings of anxiety and anger directed at traffic) (from C2, P4) Your conclusion is accompanied by feelings of anxiety and anger directed at traffic, because you believe it is the traffic s fault that your boss will think you re worthless and might fire you. HARVEY: That is it in a nutshell, Socrates. SOCRATES: But we have already established that the traffic isn t entirely to blame, haven t we? HARVEY: I suppose so. I could leave home earlier. SOCRATES: Let us take a closer look at your fourth premise. You say that being fired would be the worst thing that could happen to you. Do you really believe that? HARVEY: Yes. It would be terrible. SOCRATES: Worst than dying in a car accident? HARVEY: Ah, well, maybe not the worst thing then. SOCRATES: It is easy to catastophize. I suppose it is human nature. But for any negative outcome it is always possible to think of a worse outcome. Answer me this, are you worthless? HARVEY: I don t know. Sometimes. SOCRATES: Do you have a family? HARVEY: Yes. I have two children.

SOCRATES: Do you care for them? HARVEY: Of course. Most of what I do I do for them. SOCRATES: Would a worthless person care for their children? HARVEY: Probably not. SOCRATES: So you are not worthless, regardless of what your boss may think assuming that he would think that, which we do not know with certainty. HARVEY: I see your point. But I can t afford the risk that he will think I m worthless or fire me for being late. SOCRATES: Yes, and therefore you must get to work on time, correct? HARVEY: Correct. SOCRATES: And yet today you will be later than ever. HARVEY: I know, I know. All because of my anger and impatience. SOCRATES: Rather, your fear that your boss will think you are worthless, which lead to your anger. What you have just uncovered is a second argument. This argument is the deduction that lead to your risky behavior: P1. (Premise) My boss must not think I m worthless or fire me P2. (Premise) If I can get through this traffic, my boss will not think I m worthless or fire me C. (Conclusion) Therefore, I must do whatever needed to get through this traffic (from P1, P2) HARVEY: That s me. That s the way I think.

SOCRATES: Is it possible that your boss s opinion of you might be worse if he knew the risks you take to get to work? Would he admire you for putting lives at risk? HARVEY: Probably not. SOCRATES: You know that things may have turned out differently here, don t you? HARVEY: Yes. I could have been killed. SOCRATES: And other people could have been killed. HARVEY: Who are you? Where did you come from? I didn t see you on the sidewalk before the crash. SOCRATES: I am a lover of wisdom. It looks like your local lovers of traffic enforcement are returning. I shall leave you to talk with them. Live well my new friend.