Healthy Homes, Healthy Relationships Lesson 4 Galatians 5:22-23; Proverbs 21:9 & 27:25; Joshua 23:11-13; Deuteronomy 7:3-4; 2 Corinthians 6:14; Hebrews 13:4; 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 June 3, 2018 Introduction Healthy Dating With a 50% divorce rate among the baby boomer generation, we know that the idea of marriage is in trouble. To help people make lasting marriages today, it may be beneficial to look carefully at who and how we date. The Bible has many principles about this idea, both in the Old and New Testaments, and the message is consistent throughout. Repeatedly it urges us not to marry unbelievers. It also tells us to rely on the Holy Spirit, in us as believers, to help avoid temptation and opposition to God s word. Even if we are past our time in life for dating, we can still reflect on our marriages and counsel others who are looking for a lifetime partner. Is it ever too late to learn what God has to say about building healthy relationships? Surely not! Memory verse: But the fruit of the Spirit is love, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23 Pray and read the selections listed at the top of the page. What questions or observations do you have about these passages? 16
What do the passages say? 1. What is some evidence that the Holy Spirit is in us? (Galatians 5:22-23) 2. What behavior does this proverb address and what is its consequence? (Proverbs 21:9) 3. What metaphor is used here to describe choosing a nonbeliever as your partner? (Joshua 23:11-13) 4. If we marry someone who worships a different god, what can happen? (Deuteronomy 7:3-4) 5. What two contrasts were given when a follower of Christ marries a non-believer? (2 Corinthians 6:14) 6. In this verse, what does God command? (Hebrews 13:4) 7. To be sanctified is to be made holy. What is one expectation of those who have been sanctified? (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5) 17
What do the passages mean? 1. How does the Bible describe love? How does this relate to a healthy understanding of dating? (1 Corinthians 13:4-5; Luke 10:27; 1 John 3:16) 2. Throughout the Bible we are told what folly it is to date a non-believer and yet so many Christians do. Considering the passages we looked at above, why do Christians choose to date non-christians over Christians? (1 Corinthians 14:20; Ephesians 4:14-15; Hebrews 5:14) 3. Think back on 2 Corinthians 6:14. Christians have something in them that non-believers don t: the light of Christ and His Holy Spirit dwelling in us. Non-believers cannot draw from that well of knowledge and love. That depth of faith cannot be shared in that kind of dating relationship. How can lack of faith in God be disastrous to a relationship? (Matthew 7:26-27; Ephesians 3:16-19; Romans 12:2) 18
4. Sexual intimacy is only one aspect of a relationship between a man and wife. What other relationship traits might a dating couple focus on? (Matthew 7:12; Colossians 3:12-17; Hebrews 10:24; James 1:19-20) Applying the Passages 1. There are principles from these passages that carry over beyond just dating. If you have compromised on a conviction before, was it because you allowed an unhealthy relationship to hold too much sway in your heart and mind? How did you remedy that situation? 2. If you have not yet married and are still in the dating stage, what principles from this lesson are you going to put in place to create a healthier dating environment for yourself? 19
3. How can you best defeat temptation when it comes across your path, especially on compromising on something you know to be right? 4. It has been said that a good rule of thumb in dating is to focus on becoming the right person while in your search for the right person. What are specific things you can do to be building up a Christ-like character in your life, whether you are in the dating stage or not? Prayer Heavenly Father, thank You for sending Jesus to teach us about complete, sacrificial love. We know our love should be just as Christ s love. Sometimes, however, we fail to take Your advice, especially in our search for a life partner. We want to be loved, and in our rush to have it, we fail to develop a complete and lasting relationship anchored in Your Word. Certainly, things of this world can easily steer us off your path. The Bible even warns us, if we turn to the right or the left, we can lose our way. Instead, we must lean heavily on Your Word so our relationships can flourish and bring You glory. In You, we have the love that never fails. How wonderful it would be to experience that unfailing love with others. How wonderful it would be to help Christ s love increase and overflow in all our relationships! Amen. 20