First Baptist Church Deacon Manual. First Baptist Church 308 E. Broadway Gainesville, TX (940)

First Baptist Church Deacon Manual First Baptist Church 308 E. Broadway Gainesville, TX 76240 (940) 665-4347 ADOPTED July 19, 2015

TABLE OF CONTENTS I. INTRODUCTION 3 II. BIBLICAL QUALIFICATIONS OF DEACON 4 III. FIRST BAPTIST CHURCH DEACON QUALIFICATIONS 4 IV. PROCESS OF BECOMING AN ORDAINED DEACON 5 V. PROCESS OF BECOMING A DEACON, ALREADY ORDAINED 6 VI. SERVICE LEVELS OF A DEACON 6 VII. DEACON OFFICERS 9 VIII. DEACONS MEETINGS 9 IX. RELATIONSHIPS OF A DEACON 9 X. CONCLUSION 11 APPENDIX A. DEACON OFFICERS 12 B. NEW DEACON QUESTIONNAIRE 16 Page 2 of 21

INTRODUCTION The office of a deacon demands a high level of commitment, a mature knowledge of the faith and dedication to fellowship and service. Only those committed to these precepts should pursue this endeavor. I Timothy 3:13 summarizes it best, "For those who have served well as Deacons obtain for themselves a high standing and great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus." May your service as deacon be one of the richest and most rewarding of your walk with the Lord. The church has elected you to the honorable office of a deacon because your life has exhibited the characteristics of faithfulness and loyalty both to the Lord and His church. A deacon must remember, however, that Jesus said, "The greatest among you shall be your servant." (Matthew 23:11). Four passages in the New Testament are commonly cited concerning the office of deacon: Acts 6:1-6, Philippians 1:1, Titus 1:6-9 and I Timothy 3:8-13. The word for deacon in the New Testament originally described a servant who "stirred up dust while waiting on tables." As a deacon, your major attention will be given to serving God under the leadership of the pastor and deacon officers in the practical ministry of the church. This manual is dedicated to helping you as a deacon to serve faithfully and effectively. It is designed to acquaint you with the Biblical principles related to the office of deacon and the particulars of the deacon ministry of the First Baptist Church of Gainesville, Texas. I. THE BIBLICAL / HISTORICAL BACKGROUND OF A DEACON Acts 6:1-6 is the passage often cited for the beginning of the office of deacon in the early Christian church. Though the seven who were chosen were not specifically called "deacons" in the technical sense, they nonetheless functioned as deacons. The office of deacon probably grew out of this experience. One reason they were chosen was to solve a problem that arose among the church fellowship. They were called upon to preserve the harmony of the church. Another reason was to free the apostles to give full attention to prayer and the ministry of the Word (verse four). Page 3 of 21

II. BIBLICAL QUALIFICATIONS OF A DEACON The Biblical qualifications for a deacon are found in Acts 6:1-6, and in I Timothy 3:8-13. They are divided into three categories: A. SPIRITUAL QUALIFICATIONS (ACTS 6:1-6,) 1. Full of the Holy Spirit 2. Full of wisdom 3. Full of faith B. MORAL QUALIFICATIONS (I TIMOTHY 3: 8-10, 12-13) 1. Worthy of respect 2. Sincere 3. Not indulging in much wine 4. Not pursuing dishonest gain 5. Faithful to his wife, if married. 6. Manages his children and household well C. QUALIFICATIONS FOR THE WIFE OF A DEACON (I TIMOTHY 3:11) 1. Worthy of respect 2. Not malicious talker 3. Temperate 4. Trustworthy in everything III. FIRST BAPTIST CHURCH of Gainesville, Texas QUALIFICATIONS OF A DEACON A. TITHING Faithful tithing is part of being an active church member. The deacon, by example, is expected to be faithful in this role. B. MATURITY 1. Must have been a professing Christian for at least three years 2. Must have been a member of First Baptist Church, Gainesville for at least one year. C. ATTENDANCE Maintain faithful attendance in Church Worship and Sunday school. Page 4 of 21

IV. PROCESS FOR BECOMING AN ORDAINED DEACON Deacon Officers in consultation with the Pastor shall determine annually if additional deacons are needed to support service. Prior to nomination, candidates must have been members of FBC Gainesville for a minimum of one year. The following provisions shall serve as guidelines for nominations for election: A. Under the supervision of the Deacon Nominating Committee, prospective deacons shall be nominated by individual church members. Church members will have the opportunity to nominate prospective candidates, by secret ballot, during a specified time period. At the beginning of the nominating process, church members will be informed on deacon qualifications and the manner in which ballots will be accepted. B. The Deacon Nominating Committee will select candidates from those nominated by the church members and find out their interest in serving as a deacon. The Deacon Questionnaire will be given to these top candidates at this time. C. A Deacon Questionnaire must be filled out and returned to the Deacon Nominating Committee or Pastor's office by the deadline date for one's name to be considered for election and service. D. The Deacon Nominating Committee will review the questionnaires and Biblical qualifications for becoming a deacon and meet with each candidate and wife (if married). Any candidate not recommended by the Deacon Committee will not proceed in the process. E. The candidates who are recommended by the committee and agree to serve and complete orientation will be submitted to the Deacon body for consideration. The candidates and wives (if married) will meet with the deacon body to complete an oral examination as to their qualifications and conversion experiences. F. Candidates who are qualified to serve and who have not previously been ordained as deacons will be presented to the church for a vote in a regular business meeting. G. After the candidates have met with the Deacon Nominating Committee and are approved by the deacon body, their names will be published. Any church member with an objection to a candidate may do so in writing to the deacon chairman. The Pastor or deacon chairman will meet with the candidate privately to review the objection. If necessary, the deacon chairman or pastor will reconvene the Deacon Nominating Committee to review the objection. Page 5 of 21

V. PROCESS FOR BECOMING A DEACON, ALREADY ORDAINED At the time a man joins the church, he will be asked if he has previously served as a deacon in another church of like faith and order and if he desires to actively serve as a deacon at First Baptist Church, Gainesville. If so, he will be notified of the process and the following requirements to become active. He must: A. Be a member for at least nine months. B. Notify the Pastor and the deacon officers in writing of his desire for active deacon ministry (or be nominated through nomination process) C. Complete the Deacon Questionnaire (pages 16-21) D. Be examined by the Deacon Nominating Committee as to his qualifications and understanding of the nature of the deacon ministry opportunities. E. Be recommended by the Deacon Nominating Committee and a vote of the church in a regular business meeting. VI. SERVICE LEVELS OF A DEACON A. Active Service A deacon shall remain in active status as long as he annually indicates his desire and demonstrates his commitment to serve. Annual service will be from January 1 to December 31. We can t minister without our deacons. While there are many competing ministries outside and within the church, the deacon must place his deacon service to the Church as a priority. Ministry Expectation: 1. Attend Deacon Meetings. Please notify the Deacon Chairman or officers in advance if you are unable to attend. 2. Be an active participant of at least one ministry of the church. A Deacon is encouraged to adopt at least one ministry. 3. Attend Sunday and Wednesday services regularly unless serving in a ministry, or work schedule that prevents attending due to time conflict. 4. Lord s Supper Sign-up, show-up, serve. Every deacon is encouraged to participate in this ministry service. Because a deacon has been elected by the church he is accountable to serve in an honorable way. Similarly, the deacon officers were elected to ensure each deacon demonstrates his commitment through active participation in the duties above. The deacon officers will meet with any deacon not showing an active participation. A deacon will be declared inactive if he does not demonstrate an active participation after meeting with the deacon officers. Page 6 of 21

B. Ministry Opportunities within the Deacon Body 1. DEACONS OF THE MONTH Each Deacon will be on an assigned rotation of monthly service. Four Deacons will be selected each month to be on call to the church body and assist the Pastor and staff with visitation of the sick, hospital visits or other needs as necessary. 2. FAMILY MINISTRY PROGRAM The Deacon Family Ministry is a plan through which the deacons can join the pastor and church staff in ministering to the physical, spiritual and emotional needs of each church member and family. The resident church families are divided into groups of ten or more families. Each group of families is then assigned to a deacon who will minister to them over a period of time. 3. LORD'S SUPPER All Deacons will be expected to be participants during the serving of the Lord's Supper. Serving assignments will be made by the deacon chairman prior to the service.. 5. SINGLE LADIES VALENTINE BANQUET All deacons are expected to participate in the financing, preparation and attendance of this banquet. C. Inactive Service 1. A deacon shall remain in active status as long as he annually indicates his desire and commitment to serve, is regular in attendance at deacons' meetings, and participates in the ministries of the deacon body. If a deacon is absent from (3) consecutive deacons' meetings without acceptable explanation, he will be declared inactive. 2. There are some instances when a deacon feels it is necessary for him to become inactive for a period of time. This may be due to health issues, family situations or other personal matters. The deacon can request, in writing to the chairman, his desire to become inactive. 3. When a deacon becomes inactive he may be declared active again by; (1) Notifying the deacon officers of his desire, (2) Meeting with the Pastor and deacon officers for an updated orientation, and (3) Is approved by 75% majority vote of the quorum present at a regular meeting of the active deacons. D. Emeritus At such time as a deacon feels unable due to circumstances to continue on the active body, he can ask to be elevated to the office of Deacon Emeritus. The person Page 7 of 21

holding this title shall be accorded the respect and honor of an active deacon without being expected to attend all meetings or serve on any active deacon group. This person s absence from regularly scheduled deacons meetings shall not count against the quorum percentage. Because a deacon has been elected by the church he is accountable to serve in an honorable way. Similarly, the deacon officers were elected to ensure each deacon demonstrates his commitment through active participation in the duties above. The deacon officers will meet with any deacon not showing an active participation. A deacon will be declared inactive if he does not demonstrate an active participation after meeting with the deacon officers. Page 8 of 21

VII. DEACON OFFICERS A. Deacon Officers (Officers manual located on pp. 12-15) The deacon body will elect three officers: 1) Chairman, 2) Vice-Chairman and 3) Secretary, to serve for a one-year term from January 1 thru December 31. Their roles and duties are defined in the deacon officer manual. B. Selection of Deacon Officers The Officers' selection process will be started in October with recommendations from the New Officer Committee to be presented in November. The committee will consist of: 1) Vice-Chairman, 2) Pastor, 3) Past Chairman, and 4) Two deacons selected by the current chairman. If any of the above positions are unable to serve, the current chairman may appoint alternates to serve. The past chairman serves as the chairman of the selection committee. The selection committee prayerfully considers which deacons are best suited to serve as officers for the coming year and proposes a slate of officers willing to serve for the coming year. The Vice-Chairman can be considered for the Deacon Chairman position and the Secretary for the Vice-Chairman. If either decline to serve the following year then the committee will be responsible for filling those vacancies. The new slate of officers will be presented to the deacons for confirmation at the November meeting. The slate is to be treated as an indivisible group with the decision being to accept or reject the slate as a whole. If a vacancy occurs during the year, the same selection committee that selected that year's officers will reconvene to select a replacement for the vacancy. The selected replacement will be presented to the deacon body for approval. VIII DEACON S MEETINGS Deacon s meetings are typically held on the second Sunday of each month. Meeting will start at 4:30 pm. The February, Ladies Valentine Banquet will constitute as a regular meeting. Meetings may be cancelled by the chairman, with agreement by the pastor and deacon officers. IX RELATIONSHIPS OF A DEACON Certainly the deacon's primary relationship is to his Lord. Without that vertical relationship being what it ought to be, the horizontal relationships will be distorted. A deacon should be more concerned about his walk with God than anything. Next in importance is the deacon's knowledge and understanding of his role in relation to his family, pastor, church committees, and the church membership at large. Page 9 of 21

A. Family While a deacon's primary relationship is to the Lord the New Testament mentions a deacon's responsibility in relation to his wife and children; therefore, the church feels that a deacon should give his family high priority in his devotion, care and ministry. B. Relation to the Pastor 1. A deacon should serve under the leadership and spiritual direction of the pastor and be loyal to his pastor in prayer support, encouragement and fellowship. 2. The First Baptist Church of Gainesville looks to the pastor for giving overall leadership and administration to the church and its ministry. The church therefore expects the deacons to respect the office of pastor and to welcome the unique opportunity to learn from and serve with the pastor. As a deacon functions in the practical ministry of the church, the pastor is freed to give attention to prayer and the ministry of the Word. C. Relation to Committees The deacon body gives counsel to, but does not have control of committee actions. Nowhere in the New Testament is there even a hint that the deacon body is to function as a board of directors or as administrators of the church's business affairs. Deacons are servants first and last. The deacon body may indicate support or give counsel, but not instruct committees as to what they can or cannot propose to the church for official action. Page 10 of 21

D. Relationship to the Church Membership at Large The deacons are to be active in ministry to the church family, and to promote peace, harmony and a spirit of cooperation and unity among the membership. The deacons are a servant body to this church. Deacons are active in ministry that will enable the pastor to feed the flock faithfully and to be able to spend the necessary time in prayer for God s direction and inspiration in leading the church. X. Amendments to Manual Changes and updates to this manual may be presented in writing to the Deacon Officers. In turn, the Deacon Officers shall prepare a presentation to the Deacon Body in any regular Deacons meeting. After discussion, the amendment shall be adopted by a 2/3 approval of the Deacon Body. XI. CONCLUSION The office of a deacon demands a high level of commitment, a mature knowledge of the faith and dedication to fellowship and a spirit of servanthood. Only those committed to these precepts should pursue this endeavor. I Timothy 3:13 summarizes it best, "For those who have served well as Deacons obtain for themselves a high standing and great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus." May your service as deacon be one of the richest and most rewarding of your walk with the Lord. Page 11 of 21

First Baptist Church Gainesville, Texas Deacon Officers Manual Appendix A Page 12 of 21

Purpose of the Deacon Officers The primary responsibility of a Deacon Officer is to provide support, guidance and leadership to the deacon body and carry out the responsibilities outlined herein. The duties and responsibilities of a Deacon are set forth in the Deacon Manual. The Deacon Officers consists of a Chairman, a Vice-Chairman, and a Secretary. Typically an officer entering as Secretary will progress to become the Vice-Chairman and then Chairman in the third year. This progression is not set forth in any formal manner but it has served the Church/Deacon body well. It allows an individual time to grow into the office of Chairman and to be ready to take on the responsibilities of the office. Officers Duties Chairman Preside at meetings of the Deacon body. Serve as the lay leader of the Church. Preside at business meetings of the Church in the absence of the Moderator or Vice-Moderator. Knowledgeable of the content of the Church s Constitution and Bylaws and Deacon Manual and be able to fulfill duties outlined within. Must train incoming officers on the Deacon Officer Manual and review manual for any needed updates. Vice-Chairman Fill in for the Chairman in his absence. Administer the Deacon of the Month responsibilities. Administer any other duties requested by the Deacon Chairman. Assign duties or request volunteers for Church Projects as needed. Serve on the New Officer Selection Committee Secretary Record the minutes of the meetings and report them at the next meeting. Assist the Chairman and Vice-Chairman in duties as assigned. Keep Records of spending and report amount in the deacon fund. Observe the Chairman and Vice-Chairman. Page 13 of 21

General Considerations Preparation for Deacon Meetings Deacon Officers should prepare for each meeting 2 to 3 weeks in advance so that each person giving a report has ample time to prepare and the pastor s secretary has time to assemble the meeting packets. See Appendix A for the checklist on deacon meetings. The day of a meeting, plan to arrive at least 30 minutes early to get organized. Prepare handouts, set up the room, and be ready to start on time and run a smooth meeting. The Deacon Secretary records the minutes. The Secretary will need to file the minutes with the Pastor s secretary along with making sure each deacon receives a copy. Deacon of the Month Assignment The Vice Chairman will assign deacons of the month. Each month four deacons will be on call to help the pastor and staff in any way necessary. This may include but not limited to hospital visits, shut in visits, providing transportation to disabled, or being a prayer partner with someone in need. Lord s Supper Assignments These men have traditionally volunteered to serve the elements of the Lord s Supper. Deacon Retreat The Deacon Retreat is an event that is focused on the development of deacons for the service of God and the Church. It is typically a one day educational event that can be at the church facilities or with planning it can be held at remote locations. Deacon Valentine Banquet The Deacon Valentine Banquet is a formal event that acknowledges the FBC church single women. The program is short by nature with entertainment provided. Deacon Selection Process Under the supervision of the Deacon Nominating Committee, prospective deacons shall be nominated by individual church members. Church members will have the opportunity to nominate prospective candidates, by secret ballot, during a specified time period. Thoughts on Leadership and Criticism The problem with being in a position of leadership is that there is nobody to follow. Everyone is looking to you for a decision as to which direction we will go. If you make no decision as to a direction, then you can be assured Page 14 of 21

that nothing will get done. In fact, after awhile people will begin to go in their own directions and nothing will be achieved. You must choose a course of action and follow through on your decisions. Some will surely criticize you for your decisions, but then you will have also been criticized for making no decision. A good leader cannot please everyone. Listen to your criticisms as closely as you listen to your praises. Seek advice from all sides and be constantly in prayer asking God for his guidance. Begin all meetings that you are a part of with prayer. Surround yourself with Godly people and listen to their advice and you will not go wrong. There are good people on both sides of most issues and you should try to find the path that is right in your estimation. Most often, patience and waiting on the Lord will reveal the right choice. Page 15 of 21

APPENDIX B DEACON QUESTIONNAIRE Name: Date: Birthdate: Date Joined First Baptist Church, Gainesville, Texas: Joined by: [ ] Letter [ ] Statement [ ] Baptism [ ] Other Upon completion return this form to: First Baptist Church, Gainesville 308 E. Broadway Gainesville, TX 76240 ATTN: Pastor Attach photo if possible Please briefly describe your salvation experience and name of church where you were baptized. Have you ever been ordained as a deacon? [ ] Yes [ ] No If yes, give name of church and year. Do you feel you can conscientiously support the total church program? [ ] Yes [ ] No Are you willing to serve as a deacon? [ ] Yes [ ] No Page 16 of 21

Have you read the qualifications of a deacon and a deacon's wife in Acts 6:1-7 and I Timothy 3? [ ] Yes [ ] No Has your wife read these Scriptures? [ ] Yes [ ] No (Please read them carefully together). Are you faithful in your stewardship by tithing to First Baptist Church Gainesville? [ ] Yes [ ] No Will you be able to actively participate in the Outreach Ministry of First Baptist Church? [ ] Yes [ ] No If not, why? Are you willing to abide by the church constitution/bylaws? [ ] Yes [ ] No Are you willing to uphold to the best of your ability, and sign the Deacon Covenant? [ ] Yes [ ] No Would you be willing to give a testimony before the church and submit to the questioning of an ordaining council? [ ] Yes [ ] No Would you object to this questionnaire being reviewed by the Deacon Confirmation Committee? (Your response will be kept confidential by this committee.) [ ] Yes [ ] No Do you adhere to the central doctrines accepted by Baptists as far as you know? [ ] Yes [ ] No Can you be faithful in attendance at the regular deacons' meetings (appx. 12 a year)? [ ] Yes [ ] No Page 17 of 21

One of the responsibilities for a deacon is to be available to assist the pastor as he ministers to the church. Would you make yourself available to assist the pastor. [ ] Yes [ ] No Would your wife? [ ] Yes [ ] No Have you ever been trained to share your faith? [ ] Yes [ ] No If yes, what training did you receive? Four Spiritual Laws Roman Road Continuing Witnessing Training Marked New Testament Evangelism Explosion Power Band Other Would you be willing to accept "Deacon of the Month" assignments as outlined in the manual? [ ] Yes [ ] No Do you personally feel that you provide loving, godly leadership for your home, and that you are committed to managing your children with Christ-like principles? [ ] Yes [ ] No Have you ever been divorced? [ ] Yes [ ] No Please list below the areas where you feel you are spiritually gifted, are serving or desire to serve in the life of our church: (e.g. worship service, Bible Study, choir, outreach, etc.) Page 18 of 21

Please briefly give your views on the following and cite Scripture references if possible. - State your belief about salvation and what you believe about the security of the believer: - What do you believe about the authority and inspiration of the Scripture? - - In your opinion, what is the mission of the church? - - What do you believe the Bible teaches about the deacon's responsibilities to the home? - Briefly explain who the Holy Spirit is, and what He does for believers and what it means to be filled with the Holy Spirit? Remarks or comments on any of the previous questions: Page 19 of 21

THE DEACONSHIP The word "deacon" means servant or minister and came to be used by the church to designate a special position in the church. The deaconship, therefore, signifies a position of special Christian service. Both the Scripture and the dignity of the office demand a person of the highest spiritual, moral and practical qualifications: I. SPIRITUAL QUALIFICATIONS (ACTS 6:1-6) A. Full of the Holy Spirit. B. Full of Wisdom. C. Full of Faith. II. MORAL QUALIFICATIONS (I TIMOTHY 3: 8-10, 12-13) A. Worthy of respect B. Sincere C. Not indulging in much wine D. Not pursuing dishonest gain E. The husband of one wife F. Manages his children and household well III. QUALIFICATIONS FOR THE WIFE OF A DEACON (I TIMOTHY 3:11) A. Worthy of respect B. Not malicious talker C. Temperate D. Trustworthy in everything IV. PRACTICAL DUTIES A. Loyal support of the pastor and staff. B. Faithful attendance at the services of the church. Page 20 of 21

C. Encouragement of and participation in the organizations of the church - Sunday School, Music, Church Training, Outreach, Prayer Room, etc. D. A consistent commitment to stewardship shall be attested by the Deacon's example of tithing to the Church. E. Personal evangelism among the lost and visitation of the sick, shut-ins and indifferent of the membership. F. Regular attendance at the meetings of the deacons. G. Assistance with new member assimilation. H. Participation in the "Deacons of the Month" assignments. ============================================ I have read the spiritual, moral qualifications and practical duties for being a deacon. Believing that those qualifications and duties are Scriptural and reasonable, I pledge myself to do all within my power to bring honor to this high office and glory to the name of Christ by striving to meet them. Signature Did your wife also read the qualifications for being a deacon? If she is in agreement with the qualifications and supportive of you if elected, please have her sign below. Signature YES, my wife and I will attend the Deacon Orientation sessions together. Signature Page 21 of 21

FBC Gainesville, Texas Deacon Handbook 22 First Baptist Church, Gainesville, Texas Positional Paper on the issue of Divorce & Remarriage The following paper is an overview of the position of the FBC Gainesville, Texas Pastoral Staff. These views are not mandatory for membership or fellowship with the church but the position present here represents the principles by which the leadership of the church operates. We understand other churches may view these matters differently. It is out of a desire for the best in all relationships and to do ministry in a biblical manner and decently and in order that we offer this paper. This paper is not intended to prove our position, only state it. I. Preliminary Principles The Bible The Bible serves as our source of authority in all matters of faith. (II Timothy 3:16) We strive to evaluate all issues through the grid of the Bible over culture, public opinion or any other source of norms. Interpretation There are times when the Bible is interpreted in light of the culture in which it was written. A guiding principle for any portion of the Bible would be: literal if possible, figurative if obvious. We also recognize that some references in the Bible deal with specific issues taking place at a particular place at a particular time. Other times the Bible gives permanent principles followed by a cultural application. Even in the case of specific application, there is still a principle that is transferable beyond that specific instance. For example, women are encouraged to dress modestly. That is a permanent principle. The Bible goes on to say, not with braided hair. That was sign of prostitution in that day and stands as a cultural application of a permanent principle that in our own day would be applied with different specifics. Another example, Don t cause your brother to stumble. This is a permanent principle encouraging all believers to positively influence the spiritual growth of other believers. It then says, Don t eat meat sacrificed to idols. That was custom of that day and represents the cultural application of the permanent principle. The Scriptures that relate to marriage/divorce/remarriage contain specific application and principle. But, in either case, there is principle that spans time and situation to guide us in our understanding and decision-making. The Issue The issue of divorce/remarriage is one charged with emotion for all concerned. It is an issue increasing in our culture. It is also an issue on which there are many different opinions held by those who love God and take the Bible seriously.

FBC Gainesville, Texas Deacon Handbook 23 As we function as a church, it is our conviction that on essential issues, like salvation, we must have unity. One step down from the essential level, are important issues such as this one. It is not essential in that it affects a person s eternal future, but it does significantly impact one s life and walk with Christ. Hopefully, a difference on this issue would not cause a break in fellowship, but it is fair to know which principles FBC Gainesville, Texas embraces and from which it makes its decisions as it relates to the issue of divorce/remarriage The Staff s heart on this issue The Staff of FBC Gainesville, Texas is committed to bringing benefit to the lives of those under our spiritual care. The area of marriage and re-marriage is one that the Staff treats as a matter of great importance since the potential exists for great blessing, or sadly, great pain. Our common desire is to avoid the terrible pain caused to all involved in a divorce and pursue blessing through the application of Biblical principles and wisdom gained through experience. The Staff does not claim to know the experience of those who have gone through the pain of divorce, but we do commit ourselves to working toward health, healing and adequate preparation for future marriage so that the ideal of permanence becomes a reality. We recognize that not everyone who is divorced sought or desired such an outcome nor do we believe that divorce is the unpardonable sin. Yet, we believe it is a serious issue that we do not want to see repeated in anyone s life. It is with that heart we approach this important issue. II. Relevant Scripture Following are several passages that are central in the discussion concerning divorce/remarriage. Our purpose is not to give a complete exegesis or interpretation of the passage, but rather to help the reader understand our basic approach to each text. Genesis 2:15-25. This passage details the account of the very first marriage between Adam and Eve, officiated by God Himself. God joins a man and a woman together for their mutual benefit. Principles: Priority of marriage For this reason a man will leave his father and mother Unity/Permanence of marriage and be united to his wife Intimacy of marriage and they will become one flesh. Deuteronomy 24:1-4 This passages gives certain procedures and parameters for divorce. The heart of this passage contains a concern for women who were being dismissed with little or no cause from their marriages and their homes. This passage also hints at God s desire that divorce not become casual. It also demonstrates the reality of the fallenness of human beings and relationships can end despite God s goal of permanence. Principles: The protection of each member, especially women in this case. The need for an appropriate process

FBC Gainesville, Texas Deacon Handbook 24 The expectation is not to remarry a wife who has been divorced and is now remarried to someone else. Malachi 2:16 God expresses His displeasure at divorce due to His knowledge of the pain it inflicts on those who go through it and His desire to see covenant relationships maintained. Principles: The end of a marriage will inflict pain on those involved Divorce is never God s ideal or plan and He is strongly opposed to it Matthew 19:1-12 Jesus addresses a question meant to trick Him into taking one of two sides on the issue of divorce/remarriage in His day. Instead of choosing one of those sides, Jesus goes back to the beginning and God s goal in marriage. He stresses the permanence that takes place when a man and a woman are joined in marriage. Jesus also comments on the Deuteronomy 24 permission for divorce as a condescension to the hardness of the human heart. Once again this shows God s desire for permanence in marriage. Jesus does give an exception here, namely that sexual immorality (a fairly broad term), is a permissible reason for divorce. This sexual immorality is long-term, unrepentant participation in sexuality outside of God s parameter of the marriage covenant. Principles: God s original plan for marriage should be our goal in marriage permanence The reality of human frailty must be recognized One exception for divorce is sexual immorality I Corinthians 7:10-15 In the context of addressing numerous marital situations, Paul addresses divorce. Once again, the appeal is made not to pursue divorce but to seek permanence. Paul does speak to the issue of one spouse being deserted by the other and gives a second permissible reason for divorce, namely, desertion. By desertion we understand Paul to be describing behavior equivalent to the abandonment of the marriage. Again, this most likely includes a long-term pattern of behavior and does not refer to a couple that does not speak to each for a week or so. To that person, Paul gives a permission to remarry in the words that such a person (one who has been abandoned by an unbeliever) is not bound in such circumstances. Principles: Couples are to seek permanence as a goal A believing spouse who is deserted by an unbeliever is not bound which understand to imply that he/she is free to remarry FBC Gainesville, Texas Position on Divorce/Remarriage Because marriage has been established by God as a permanent union, and since it is an earthly copy of the relationship between God and His people, it is to be maintained through a life-long, mutual commitment between a husband and a wife. However, because of the

FBC Gainesville, Texas Deacon Handbook 25 fallenness of human nature, the Bible permits divorce in the following cases as a condescension to human frailty for the protection of the innocent part: 1. Divorce for the cause of immorality with the understanding that the obligation to maintain or reinstate the marriage may not be imposed upon the innocent spouse. 2. Divorce for desertion by an unbeliever desertion being defined as behavior equivalent to the abandonment of the marriage relationship. In such cases, the offending party becomes subject to church discipline in order to bring about repentance and reconciliation. Should efforts to achieve restoration fail, the innocent spouse is not bound. He or she is free to remarry in the Lord if the divorce included the two biblical reasons stated above. The remarriage of believers may not be approved when: 1. The present relationship led to the demise of a previous marriage. 2. There is no evidence of repentance and brokenness over the circumstances that caused divorce. 3. Restoration of the original marriage remains a viable option. 4. The issues contributing to the demise of the previous marriage have not been identified and worked through and adequate healing has yet to take place. Each case of divorce or remarriage has to be dealt with on an individual basis from the perspective of God s inexhaustible capacity to forgive human sin and to restore broken lives. Separation There are times when it may be beneficial for couples to separate geographically due to the intensity of the situation and/or behavior in the home. When separation occurs, the goal is to work toward reconciliation and restoration. As a general principle, the pastoral staff will work toward restoration rather than divorce and counsel toward an appropriate level of protection for all while giving God an opportunity to perform a work of healing.