Date: 30 April/1 May 2016 Character Focus: Forgiveness Small Group Leader s Guide Theme: Forgiveness Lesson 4 of 4 I will not seek revenge or take up other people s unforgiveness Series Overview We are starting on our new series on the character value of Forgiveness. Forgiveness means letting go of feelings like anger, sadness, or frustration that happen when you or someone else makes a mistake. Its saying Thank you or That s okay when someone apologizes and not staying upset about what they did. It s having patience with yourself and others, and recognizing that no one is perfect everyone makes mistakes. It s letting go of hurt feelings, and moving ahead, ready to do things. It doesn t mean that all of a sudden what someone did doesn t hurt or isn t wrong. Forgiveness is not ignoring wrong, setting aside standards of truth and virtue, or excusing that person who hurts you from the responsibility for wrong actions. It means that you find it in your heart to give the person another chance. When you are able to forgive someone from your heart first and let go of the grudge, you will gradually be able to forgive in deeds and actions. Those who find it hard to forgive are often those who see themselves as if they do not need forgiveness from others. They might also find it hard to ask for forgiveness and tend to be rigid and critical of others. Teaching a child in the area of forgiveness will help them to experience God s forgiveness and be less critical of themselves and others and be more accepting of themselves and of others and learning not to bear a grudge. The children will learn to demonstrate forgiveness through the 4 I will do namely:- 1. I will be quick to forgive because God has forgiven my sin 2. I will be quick to forgive and respond kindly to those who hurt me 3. I will not cover my own wrongs but will be quick to ask for forgiveness 4. I will not seek revenge or take up other people s unforgiveness Memory Verse Put up with one another. Forgive one another if you are holding something against someone. Forgive, just as the Lord forgave you. Colossians 3:13 (NIRV) Copyright 2016 by GKidz, FCBC Page 1
Bible Passage: Genesis 37-50 Joseph forgave his brothers and did not take Revenge. Introduction We are going to teach the children on the values of the heart Forgiveness. There will be 4 lessons on Forgiveness. Date Lesson Character Action Point/ Bible Passage Family Devotion 9/10 April Lesson 1 16/17 April Lesson 2 23/24 April Lesson 3 30 April/1 May Lesson 4 I will be quick to forgive because God has forgiven my sin. Matthew 18: 21 35 Parable of the Unforgiving Servant I will be quick to forgive and respond kindly to those who hurt me. 2 Samuel 9 David responded kindly to Mephibosheth, the son of a wicked king who wanted to kill him. I will not cover my own wrongs but will be quick to ask for forgiveness. Genesis 33 Jacob sought forgiveness from Esau I will not seek revenge or take up other people s unforgiveness. Genesis 37-50 Joseph forgave his brothers and did not take revenge Forgive S more take home activity child to share what they have written on the various forgiving hearts. Parents to share their personal journey in forgiveness. Disciple their child using the Benefits of Forgiveness framework. - Receive God s forgiveness (Mark 11:25) - Purify our hearts (1Jn1:9) - No grudge or revengeful spirit (Prov 24:29) - Leads to healing (Matt 9:6) Who do I feel safe to own up my wrongs worksheet - child would feel safe to share their wrongs and ask parents for forgiveness. Enlarge the safe place to school and to GKidz Parents read the story of Joseph forgiving his brothers to the child. Discuss Joseph s way of handling unforgiveness Copyright 2016 by GKidz, FCBC Page 2
PLATFORM TEACHING (15 mins) Logistics: Powerpoint slides, Youtube video playback, (GKidz will provide) PT: Hi children, look at these people on the slides. Can you tell me what they are saying? Based on their facial expressions, can you tell me what are they asking? Yes, they are asking for forgiveness. Let s see. Do you know who is in Picture 1? Yes, she is Rui En. She asked the public to forgive her for car knocking into a motorbike and speaking in a rude way to the owner. PT: The person in Picture 2 is. Yes, he is the famous singer Justin Bieber. He wrote a song Sorry. Can you believe it? Well, Justin has many things he was sorry about. For breaking the laws and leading all his fans astray with his bad example in his private life. PT: How about the last slide? Judy asked Nick to forgive her and eventually he did. PT: How many of you really felt that through this lesson series, you were able to be more forgiving and can even forgive the same person over and over again? So, what is the secret to do that? (Show Recap Slide 1). Who can tell me what is the Bible Story to teach us on the first I will (Ans: The Parable of the Unforgiving Servant who can t cancel his fellow servant s debts even though his master had cancelled his huge debts) PT: Who can tell me to forgive and forgive and forgive, what is the second I Will? (Show Recap Slide 2). What is the Bible Story that helped us learn to respond kindly? (Ans: David responded kindly to a wicked king s grandson, Mephibosheth) PT: What is the third I Will? (Show Recap Slide 3). And that was last week s lesson. Who can tell me the Bible Story? (Ans: Jacob asked Esau to forgive him. He did not ask quickly but waited for 20 years and he finally plucked up courage after God had spoken to him in a dream). PT: Let s all repeat aloud all the 3 I Will. So, what is the fourth I Will? Let s watch this video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8k5-8hiinm Duration 3:27 min. PT: The fourth I will is I will not seek revenge or take up other people s unforgiveness. (slide) That means that we will forgive others instead of wanting to take revenge on them. (slide) We are going to play a fun ice breaker in our small groups and learn more! Copyright 2016 by GKidz, FCBC Page 3
CONNECT / ICEBREAKER Eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth (5 mins) Objective: To let the children have fun in connecting with each other using their body parts. Leader: Children, have any of you heard of this phrase an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. Is this a biology lesson? No, it is a phrase which means if you punch my eyes, I will seek revenge and punch your eyes. If you break my tooth, I will also break your tooth. But, today we are going to redeem this phrase and play this simple ice breaker. As I shout out the body parts, you are to find a partner and quickly join together with him/her in the body part I shout out. Example, I say Head to head, what must you do? (Let the children respond as a way of checking they have received the instructions correctly. This is a technique to check the children have your instruction). Body parts - head to head, foot to foot, eye to eye, shoulder to shoulder, etc. Leader: Children, just now the video introduced the person Joseph and guess which part of his body was the most wounded? Was it his eye, tooth, nose, legs? Yes, it was his heart. Let s see which I will did Joseph apply in his life? CHARACTER REVIEW (5 mins) The 4 I Will s chart will be provided Leader: It is possible to be quick to forgive because God has given you. What is Forgiveness? Forgiveness is clearing the record of those who have wronged me and not bearing a grudge. There are 4 ways to practice Forgiveness:- 1. I will be quick to forgive because God has forgiven my sin 2. I will be quick to forgive and respond kindly to those who hurt me 3. I will not cover my own wrongs but will be quick to ask for forgiveness 4. I will not seek revenge or take up other people s unforgiveness Today we will learn and apply the fourth I will that is, I will not seek revenge or take up other people s unforgiveness We will study a story from the Bible of a man who had been repeatedly bullied, wrongly accused and taken for granted but he chose to forgive and not seek revenge. Copyright 2016 by GKidz, FCBC Page 4
BIBLE STORY (20 mins) Genesis Chapter 37 50 - Joseph forgave his brothers and did not take revenge Logistics: 5 laminated Storyboard cards (GKidz to provide) Joseph http://dreamworks.wikia.com/wiki/joseph?file=joseph_rainbowcoat.jpg Joseph s 11 brothers http://www.freebibleimages.org/illustrations/preschool- joseph- dreamer/ Potiphar s wife http://images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/29600000/asenath- Joseph- King- of- dreams- childhood- animated- movie- heroines- 29662859-600- 338.png Chief cupbearer http://www.freebibleimages.org/photos/joseph- baker- cupbearer/ Joseph forgives his brothers http://www.goodsalt.com/search/joseph_and_brothers.html?pagenum=2 Using the storyboard cards, ask the children WHO<WHAT<WHEN. These are the 3 characters who have wronged Joseph in various stages of his life. Leader to ask the children to turn to the Bible passages and read the text and answer the questions. Leader s Preparation Read the Chapters and highlight Bible verses for each character Joseph s 11 brothers, Potiphar s wife, Chief Cupbearer and how each of them wronged Joseph. DISCUSSION QUESTIONS 1. WHO were the people Joseph had to forgive? (Ans: His 11 brothers. Imagine 11 brothers ganged up against Joseph; Potiphar s wife, Chief Cupbearer 2. WHAT did Joseph s brothers have done against him? (Ans: They sold him to an Egyptian slave master and lied to their father, Jacob that Joseph was killed by a ferocious animal) 3. WHAT did Potiphar s wife accuse Joseph that had led him to be imprisoned? (Ans: She lied to Potiphar that Joseph had raped her) 4. WHAT did the chief cupbearer do to thank Joseph for interpreting his dream? (Ans: He did nothing. He was supposed to show Joseph kindness by mentioning his name to Pharaoh) 5. WHEN did all these incidents happen to Joseph s life Copyright 2016 by GKidz, FCBC Page 5
6. Was it easy for Joseph to forgive his 11 brothers, Potiphar s wife and the chief cupbearer? Did Joseph take revenge? What did he do instead? 7. How did God redeem Joseph s from all the wrongs these people had done to him? (Ans: Joseph was given authority to rule in Egypt) Summary: It is often easy to act out our anger when someone hurt or wrong us by seeking revenge and be quick to misbehave either in being impolite or aggressive in our behavior. Some of us purposely trigger negative behaviour to make our parents angry as a form of revenge. Or, some of us are hurt when one of our parents is hurting the other parent. For example, you always see daddy hurling angry and abusive words to your mummy and you take up her unforgiveness and find ways to take revenge by purposely misbehaving towards your daddy. All of these actions are ungodly and wrong and you need to ask God to forgive you for taking revenge. Here are some Forgiveness Challenge and let s see who can really forgive and not seek revenge. APPLICATION ACTIVITY (10 mins) Leader: Children what would you do in these situations. Which I will would you apply to forgive. Forgiveness Challenge Your friend accidentally broke your favorite toy You did something you feel is very bad (forgiving yourself) Your brother takes something of yours without asking You saw your daddy shouting at your mum and she is crying sadly Your friend got angry and said something unkind to you and then apologized You saw a friend cheating in a school test but the teacher did not catch the cheater instead she punished you for looking at the cheater s papers when in fact you are checking if the cheater did copy from another classmate s answers Someone keeps doing something hurtful to you over and over without being sorry* Copyright 2016 by GKidz, FCBC Page 6
*There are some times when forgiveness won t help someone change their behavior, and it isn t the only virtue you need to call on. While you can let go of the angry feelings, you should also stay away from that person (if you can) and stop giving him or her the chance to hurt you. In these cases, respect for yourself and justice (making sure everyone is being treated fairly, including yourself) are just as important as forgiveness REVIEW MEMORY VERSE (10 mins) Memory Verse: Put up with one another. Forgive one another if you are holding something against someone. Forgive, just as the Lord forgave you. Colossians 3:13 (NIRV) Write the MV on the whiteboard and have some key words removed. Ask the children to recite the MV. Slowly, remove more key words and eventually the whole MV including the Bible reference and have them recite the whole MV from their memory. Reward children who are able to do that with a small candy. PLATFORM MINISTRY RESPONSE (10 mins) PT: Forgiveness is a choice and not taking revenge is a choice. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f0ionkrf_e4. Duration 1:34min PT to plan ahead an agreed timing to gather the children for platform ministry time. Be sensitive during this ministry time. Some children seek soft revenge when they are angry with their teachers or parents for wrongly hurting them. Some example of soft revenge is to pull triggers in their emotions by purposely being lazy, uncompliant, untidy, late for meals, disobedient. The aggressive revenge children are those who use physical actions to voice out their unforgiveness. Ask the Holy Spirit to speak to you during the week and during the Leaders Briefing time, ask leaders for real input from their children who are struggling in this area. Copyright 2016 by GKidz, FCBC Page 7
Parent s Toolkit (5 mins) Remind the children to do these at home with their parents. 1. Go through pages 19-27 of Booklet C Values of the Heart, Character Development Parents Toolkit. 2. Go through Week of the Star Action Chart and earn as many stars as you can. References 1. Character First Education Series 1, Booklet 7 Copyright 2016 by GKidz, FCBC Page 8