EVANGELISM EXPLOSION INTERNATIONAL PARTNERS IN FRIENDSHIP

PURPOSE One of Evangelism Explosion s primary goals is to equip you for friendship evangelism. Hence, the purpose of this booklet is to help you think through, pray about and plan carefully an effective strategy for reaching the people in the natural context of your daily life. Remember, friendship evangelism is not a special activity which you undertake at a prescribed time. Rather it is a constant, spontaneous witness to Christ by your life and your lips. 1

It means using existing relationships and developing new ones as bridges through which to share the Gospel. And it is meant to be done in concert with fellow believers in your local church. 2

You are strategically located at the center of a network of relationships. 3

By birth you have a family and relatives; through social and sports activities you have friends; where you reside you have neighbors; at work you have associates; by daily activities you develop other casual acquaintances such as your physician, dentist, insurance agent, hairdresser and mail carrier. A survey conducted by the Institute of American Church Growth tells us that as high as 79 percent of Christians can trace their spiritual roots to either a friend or a relative. That s because people trust a friend s witness more than a stranger s, because a friend s witness is usually natural and unhurried, their life-style adds credibility, and because the friend s church provides a natural and credible aid to nurture and follow-up. Friendship evangelism was the predominant way the gospel spread in the first century. You have, no doubt, noticed many examples of this in the New Testament. 4

For instance, there was Jesus dining with Matthew s family and associates, John the Baptist pointing his followers to the Savior, Andrew bringing his brother to the Savior, Philip introducing his friend Nathanael to Christ. As you begin to take seriously this very exciting and biblical ministry, you may suddenly come to the shocking realization that you don t have many non-christian friends. Don t feel badly about it! This is true of many very dedicated Christians. You see, the longer you are a believer, the more involved you become in church life and activities. And this causes you to be gradually lifted out of your non-christian relationships. 5

If this is true in your experience, you will want to look for creative ways to involve yourself with unbelievers in order to share with them the love of God and the gospel of Christ. 6

In the following pages we will endeavor to help you do just that. May God by His Spirit and for His glory lead you, bless you, and use you to bring many of your friends, relatives, associates and neighbors to Christ! 7

PERSONAL TOUCH Dr. Win Arn of the Institute for American Church Growth states that a church s ability to grow is directly linked to its ability to love. It that s true, then we can be sure that people will also be drawn to Christ through the love of His followers! Everyone wants to be loved and respected. Everyone wants to be accepted and treated like a friend. Hence, if you want to draw people to your Savior, you need to take time to get to know people, to develop meaningful relationships with them and to show them you care about them. 8

You need to involve your friends in activities that will express genuine love and build meaningful relationships such as inviting them to a dinner or picnic, taking them to a ball game, going shopping or fishing with them, taking them with you to the beach or sight-seeing. When they are away on a trip, you can express Christ s love to them by mowing their lawn, shoveling their sidewalk, feeding their pets, collecting their newspapers and mail. 9

Or when they re in the hospital, you might consider providing a meal, doing their laundry, cleaning their house, giving a timely gift or helping with a financial need. At Christmas, Easter, birthdays and anniversaries, thoughtful greeting cards also let them know you care. A timely phone call or visit when your friend faces serious illness or death can also be very meaningful. When you sense the time is right and you have developed a warm relationship with your friends, invite them to some visitor-friendly events at your church such as Friends Days, Easter pageants, Christmas cantatas and church picnics. Such personal touches will let your friends know you care. 10

PERSONAL PROFILES One way to clearly demonstrate that you care for your friends is to get to know them well and to keep a record of important data that will help you to relate to them on a personal, caring level. 11

On the following ten pages we provide space for you to record profiles of your Ten Most Wanted. At the bottom of each page you will find a 6-step graph which you can use to chart your evangelistic progress with each person. To select your Ten Most Wanted take a piece of scrap paper and list as many unsaved persons in your network of relationships as you can recall. Then prioritize the list, and transcribe the names of your top ten to the following pages. 12

Name Spouse Birthday Anniversary Date Address City State Zip Home Phone Work Children Hobbies Employment Special Interests 13

Name Spouse Birthday Anniversary Date Address City State Zip Home Phone Work Children Hobbies Employment Special Interests 14

Name Spouse Birthday Anniversary Date Address City State Zip Home Phone Work Children Hobbies Employment Special Interests 15

Name Spouse Birthday Anniversary Date Address City State Zip Home Phone Work Children Hobbies Employment Special Interests 16

Name Spouse Birthday Anniversary Date Address City State Zip Home Phone Work Children Hobbies Employment Special Interests 17

Name Spouse Birthday Anniversary Date Address City State Zip Home Phone Work Children Hobbies Employment Special Interests 18

Name Spouse Birthday Anniversary Date Address City State Zip Home Phone Work Children Hobbies Employment Special Interests 19

Name Spouse Birthday Anniversary Date Address City State Zip Home Phone Work Children Hobbies Employment Special Interests 20

Name Spouse Birthday Anniversary Date Address City State Zip Home Phone Work Children Hobbies Employment Special Interests 21

Name Spouse Birthday Anniversary Date Address City State Zip Home Phone Work Children Hobbies Employment Special Interests 22

PRAYER Friendship evangelism s most crucial element is prayer; because without prayer, everything is vain human endeavor. But with prayer God s power is tapped, friends are drawn to Christ, hearts are opened, faith and repentance are granted, souls are saved and angels rejoice! Most of us are in the Family of God today because someone prayed for us. Now God wants us to pray that those in our network of relationships will come to Christ. When you start the day with God in prayer, pray through your Ten Most Wanted list. Do all you can in your lifetime through prayer to bring them to Christ, and keep chipping away until all ten have accepted Christ. 23

Paul wrote to his disciple Timothy, I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercessions and thanksgiving be made for everyone...this is good, and pleases God our Savior, who wants all men to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth. I Timothy 2:1-4 (NIV) 24

Paul wrote to the Colossians, Continue in prayer, and watch in the same with thanksgiving; withal praying also for us, that God would open unto us a door of utterance, to speak the mystery of Christ. Colossians 4: 2-3 John wrote that God alone openeth and no man shutteth... Revelation 3:7 And Luke tells us that The Lord opened her heart to respond to Paul s message. Act 16:14 (NIV) 25

PLAN It s said, if you fail to plan, you plan to fail. Some Christians fear that planning runs counter to faith. But the Bible is full of planning, because planning is an evidence of faith rather than a contradiction of it! So why not plan like it s all up to you and pray like it s all up to God, bathing your plans in prayer and asking God to reveal to you His will for each step. Most of us have a foggy idea of where we want to go and what we might do, but without a plan we drift from day to day never moving forward with any clear direction. 26

So a plan will give you a step-by-step sequencing of what might be done in logical order within a reasonable time frame for focused effort and intentional praying. Above is a suggested 6-step plan you can use in charting your friendship evangelism approach over a six-month or one-year period. 27

We suggest that you use one of these for each of your Ten Most Wanted. To help you do that we have printed a chart on each of the profile pages. Try to complete one step at least every two months. Under each step is the goal suggested for that two-month step. Above the step are two suggestions for some things you can do or some places you can go to attempt your goal. Please feel free to adapt this to your situation and preferences. You may want to enlist another believer or another couple to follow this same plan. Then you can pray regularly for one another and hold one another accountable to complete - with God s help - all six steps within the coming year. 28

When you get together with your non-christian friends, build rapport and flesh out the details of your profile by asking questions. Notice that the topics move gradually toward the core of their life. For instance, to become acquainted conversing over the fence with your neighbor you might say, Hi, I m John (or Mary) Smith, and I ve been wanting to get to know you. I ve been living here for 10 years. I like this neighborhood a lot. How are you finding it? 29

We ll have to get together and go to a ball game (or shopping) some time. Would you enjoy that or is there something else you like to do for relaxation? When talking about their secular life you might ask, How do you like Ft. Lauderdale? How long have you lived here? Where have you lived before? What do you do for a living? How long have you been working there? What other kinds of work have you done? Tell me a little bit about your family. What do you like to do to relax? Are you into sports? music? reading? clubs? gardening? anything else? As for family values, you might ask, What is your family background? i.e. brothers, sisters, etc.? What kind of things did your family do for vacation? for having fun together? Were you a close-knit family? To what do you attribute that? What principles did your family follow in raising you? Have you or will you adopt any of those for 30

yourself? When was the last time your family had a reunion and what did you do? How important is family to you and why? As you move toward the subject of their church background, you may want to ask, How interested in spiritual things are you? Do you perceive God as a personal B e i n g to w h o m yo u c a n pray? Do you have a place where you meet regularly for worship? How did you happen to go there? How long have you attended? How involved are you? Where did you attend before going there? 31

They may ask you questions about your church background. This will give you opportunity to share your church testimony. Be careful not to come on too strong, but if appropriate, share with them an example of loving care in and through your local church. We will discuss the next step, personal testimony, in more detail in the next section. But before we do, we should emphasize that the above steps and the timing for each step should be very flexible. The Holy Spirit may open the way for you to accomplish all six steps in one visit. The important thing is not to move ahead of the Holy Spirit by being too pushy or behind Him by being insensitive to your friends openness. One other bit of advice. Don t be hesitant to jot down bits of information about your friends like names of children, birthdays, anniversaries, addresses, phone numbers, etc. for your profile. 32

This shows genuine interest and care. Be careful, at the same time, that you don t come across like a news reporter or crime investigator! Now let s consider the next step - personal testimony. 33

PERSONAL TESTIMONY Every true Christian has a personal testimony how God saved him or her. Your testimony may not be as dramatic as someone else s, but if you have trusted Christ as your Savior, you have one. Someone has suggested that a good outline for a testimony is 1. You know what I was. 2. You know what I am now. 3. Jesus made the difference. 4. Are you interested? Use the above outline and write out your testimony, fleshing out the outline with personal details on how God has demonstrated His grace, love and power in your life. Avoid generalities and cliches. Use vivid personal illustrations. Be positive and focus on God s faithfulness. 34

You may want to consider what God has done for you since you trusted Christ as your Savior, how He has given your life purpose, forgiveness, answers to prayer, how He has met a need, brought you through a difficult experience or changed your life. Now, rewrite your testimony a few times until you have it in clear, concise form. Then practice sharing it with a Christian friend. 35

PRESENTATION of the GOSPEL Every Christian should be able to share God s plan of salvation to an unbeliever. Peter wrote, Be ready always to give an answer to every man that asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you with meekness and reverence. 1 Peter 3:15 If you have not yet taken Evangelism Explosion, you should prayerfully consider enlisting in your local church s next semester of training. Comparing soul-winning to running a race, Paul wrote, Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not la st; but we do it to get a c rown that will la st forever. 1 Corinthians 9:25 (NIV) 36

While you re waiting for the next semester of training to commence, get a few Do You Know for Sure? tracts from your EE ministry leader, so you can use it to walk someone page-by-page through the EE presentation. There are illustrations in the tract that will make the gospel extra clear to your friends. Don t be content to simply share the gospel. In dependence upon the Holy Spirit, try if at all possible to bring your friend to a place of decision and through a prayer of commitment. 37

The Do You Know for Sure? tract has a suggested prayer, a birth certificate and five steps for immediate follow-up. When it comes to sharing the gospel, there are two more important instructions. First, avoid cramming the gospel down someone s throat. You would never barge into a person s home without knocking, would you? Likewise, never share the gospel with a person until you ve asked permission. Secondly, sometimes you will encounter a person who is as slippery as a fish; in other words, every time you start witnessing, they change the subject or have to go somewhere or do something. The best way to deal with such a person is to invite them to go with you to a restaurant for a cup of coffee or meal. Tell them ahead of time that something exciting has happened in your life and you want to share it. Don t give away the answer ahead of time. 38

When you get to the restaurant, share your personal testimony the most exciting thing that could happen to anyone! Then ask permission to share with them the good news of how it all came about. Weave the gospel into your testimony and ask them if it makes sense. Then ask them if they would like to receive the gift of eternal life. Be sure to have with you your New Testament and a supply of the Do You Know for Sure? tract. 39

PRIORITIES Friendship evangelism will take time. Everyone has time for what they really want to do most in their life! If you sincerely care about the lost persons in your network of relationships, you will set aside quality time to pray for them, to build relationships with them, to develop and implement a thoughtful plan to influence them for Christ. One of the busiest men in the Christian world blocks out on his calendar four hours every week, just to spend time with his friends and neighbors. He knows that if he doesn t prioritize his time, he will never be able to do friendship evangelism. 40

So, start now. Deliberately plan your schedule to include those on your Ten Most Wanted list. Use this Partners in Friendship booklet daily. Keep it in your pocket or purse at all time, so you can pray intelligently for your friends, acquaint yourself with the details of their lives and continually update their profile. Some of them will come to Christ. Others will move away out of your sphere of influence. Replace their names with new friends. Whatever you do, don t give up! Remember that the only place success comes before work is in the dictionary. In Christ s harvest, hard, persistent work leads to abundant fruitfulness. 41

PERSEVERANCE According to research, people need on an average 7 personal touches and 3 hearings of the gospel to get them saved and into the church. In rare cases, some people may need only 2 touches and 1 hearing while others may need as many as 25 touches and 10 hearings. Whatever the case, don t become discouraged or impatient if your friend doesn t come to Christ as soon as you had hoped. Remember what Paul said: Let us not be wear y in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. Galations 6:9 Happy Fishing! 42

EE. It Works! Evangelism Explosion International P.O. Box 23820 Fort Lauderdale, Florida 33307 Tel. 954.491.6100 Fax 954.771.2256 www.eeworks.org E009