I m going to tell you a lot of Cherokee stories today and you can decide if they help you in any way with leadership, as they have helped me. I do want to say something about being an elder. Amongst the women, we have a special ceremony which I haven t had yet when you reach 51. The reason we have this ceremony is because we think it takes 50 years to make as many mistakes as you need to make, so you can learn all you need to learn to start behaving in a wiser fashion. Let me say to you a quote from the Shawnee: Hear me we are weak as a single twig, but strong as a bundle. So I appreciate what PKAL has done, and that you have volunteered your time in being here today because there is great strength in the bundle we make together. Let me tell you something that I learned about being a human, because not all people are human. And also about being a leader. We have a story A grandfather one day saw his grandson come home with much anger, because a friend had been unjust to him. He could see that his grandson was going to find a way to get even with his young peer. So the grandfather said, Let me tell you a story. You might have heard among the Cherokee and other American Indians something we say about stories: we don t know if this is what happened, but we know that it is true. Story: Feeding Two Wolves So the grandfather said: You must know this when you are thinking about how the world works. You see, my grandson, inside of me there is a terrible battle going on. There are two wolves fighting inside of me. The grandson s eyes grew very large, and he said: Two wolves inside of you, grandfather? The grandfather replied: Yes. And they fight constantly. Let me tell you of the two wolves. One of these wolves is good. It s full of love and trust, and wants to live in harmony with everything around it. It takes no offense easily, and it dishes out no offense. The only reason that it fights is because it must do so, and so it fights constantly with the other wolf. The grandson asked: What is the other wolf? The grandfather answered: Ah. The other wolf is full of anger. It sets off at the littlest thing in rage. It has fits of temper, and thinks only of how to control others. It is certain that the world is not working right, and that it must fight all the time. And so these two wolves are constantly engaged in battle. The grandson thought for a while, then said to the grandfather: Well, which wolf wins? The grandfather answered: Whichever wolf I feed. So my elders taught me to be very careful in which wolves I feed. Karan Watson Dean of Faculties Associate Provost Texas A&M University RECOMMENDATIONS FOR LEADERS have a vision and share your vision with with others have a sense of context of where you are share with others that sense of context, sequence, and strategy communicate, so that you and those who follow you can keep in mind the same remember that action is important, and even more important is inspiring others to act know how to face fears your job is to share. This talk was presented at the 2006 PKAL LI Leadership Seminar at Trinity University. 1
Story: A Frog Journey One of the things I want to talk to you about is how we may think we re supposed to behave as leaders. So I m going to tell you a story about what it means to become a leader. My greatgrandmother always asks me: How is your frog journey going? So I ll explain to you what a frog journey is. Once there was a frog in a pond, and he was the best that a frog can be. This frog could see further than other frogs could see. This frog could sense the world around it better than any of the others. It could find food, could find shade, and knew when to bury itself for the winter before any of the others. This frog had the deepest, greatest song you would ever hear from a frog. And this frog could jump like no other frog. You may not realize it but in every animal s life, at some point, Coyote comes to ask a very important question: What is it you will do with your life? So when that question was posed to this great frog, he thought about it and said: I have heard that there is a place that is the source of all beauty. I want to go to that place. I want to see it, I want to feel it, I want to sing and jump in the place that is the source of all beauty. Coyote said to the frog: I will tell you that the place is on the top of that far mountain you see over there. But I must warn you, it is not in getting to that place but in how you make the journey to get from this place to that place that will determine if you actually find the source of all beauty. The frog was up for the challenge, and took off. As he was passing through a broad field while heading for the hills, he ran into a little group of field mice. They were in trouble; they were clearly hungry and distressed. He asked them: What is your problem? They replied: We have become stuck. We can t find any food. We re so focused on what is just in front of us that we can t get out of this field, where there is no more food. We can t see far enough to know where we should go next. The frog said: I am on a special journey, but I will give you a gift. If you will help me to the trail ahead, I will give you my sight so that you can see far. So he gave the field mice his great vision so that they could see far to find food. They helped him get across the rest of the field, and start up the path toward the mountaintop. He kept walking, unable to see but sure that he was on the right path. Eventually he ran into a caterpillar who was very sad and woeful. The caterpillar said I am surely going to die. I don t know how to make the right step to change from my present state to my next state. The frog asked: What has happened to you? The caterpillar replied: All my brothers and sisters and I have forgotten how to sense the world around us, and we don t know when it s time for us to change. And so the frog said: I am on an important journey, but I will give this to you. He transferred to them his ability to sense the world around him, and to know the next right move. The caterpillars lined up to help him up the mountain, so that he could touch them to know the way. As he walked up the mountain, the frog came across a wolf. This wolf was clearly distressed. The frog asked: Why are you so distressed? The wolf replied: I am lost, and cannot find the rest of my pack. We used to sing gloriously so that we could find each other. Now we can t sing, and are scattered. We cannot find each other, can t stay together, and cannot move through the forest together without our song. So the frog gave his song to the wolf. The wolf could now howl gloriously, and could find his brothers and sisters. The wolf helped the frog up the mountain, back to the trail. Finally, on the last stretch of his journey, the frog ran into a deer. The deer said: I am stuck. We used to be able to get over every obstacle by just jumping. We can t jump anymore, and can t overcome these obstacles. The frog said: If you will help me to the top of the mountain, I will give you my ability to jump. So he did, and the deer could jump and overcome obstacles again. The deer carried the frog to the top of the mountain, and left him there. The frog sat and thought: I m a little sad. I can t see, I can t feel, I can t sing about this place, and I can t jump. But I think it s enough that I made it to the source of all beauty. I am at peace, and I am happy. Coyote appeared at that point, and asked the frog: So you are pleased with your journey to get to the source of beauty? The frog said: Yes, I am. It was important to me even though I gave up much to be here. 2
Then Coyote grabbed the frog and threw him high in the air. As he flew through the air, the frog was able to see further than he had ever been able to. He could again sense and feel every motion of the earth, greater than he ever had. His ability to sing came back, not as the low song of a frog but as a high pitched song. He could not jump, but now could fly because the frog has become the eagle. And that is why we look to the eagles for leadership. They have made a great journey. If you have remembered that as a leader your job is to share, then you understand what it is to soar like an eagle. Leadership questions: So how is your frog journey going? Have you remembered that to achieve the goals you want to achieve, you must have vision? But have you also remembered that you must share that vision? Have you remembered that you must have a sense of context of where you are? But have you also remembered that you must share with others that sense of context, sequence, and strategy? Have you remembered that it s very important to communicate, to find a song that is pleasant to all your brothers and sisters so that you can keep in mind the same end? Have you remembered that action is important, and even more important (as a leader) than your action is being able to inspire and motivate and give the gift of action to the others that would follow you? If you have remembered that as a leader your job is to share, then you understand what it is to soar like an eagle. So what keeps people from being great leaders? What makes it so that it s hard for you to take a risk? You all have an answer about an obstacle. They won t let us do this. It s the registrar. It s the president. It s the old faculty. It s the new faculty. We all have stories about why we can t do something. I went to a workshop once and every time I said why we hadn t accomplished something yet, the facilitator would ask me again: And why haven t you done that? And after about the tenth why, she finally had me understanding. I could understand all the hardships and obstacles, but the reason why was that I didn t want to risk the failure. At a deep level that I couldn t understand easily, my fear of failing, of trying my hardest to influence people to understand why we must do this and them not doing it, was keeping me from trying hard enough. Story: The Woman Who Lived With Fear So I will tell you the story of the woman who lived with Fear, a story by Karen Gould. There was a woman no one knew why Fear came to live with her, but he did. He lived with her constantly. Everyone knew this, because she would hardly ever come out of her cabin. They knew it was Fear that kept her inside. One day, she decided I will go and get berries with the others. I will get out of my cabin and go. But Fear stopped her. He sat right in front of her and said Oh no, you cannot go out. You will be with the others and they will laugh at you. Something bad will happen. You shouldn t go out. She argued with Fear, but Fear never gave up. The next day she thought again I want to go out and pick berries with others. Fear again said No, you can t. She tried to push past Fear, but Fear would not let her go. So she struggled a little bit, but eventually gave up. The next day she got up, and Fear seemed just a little bit smaller than he had been before. So she stepped up to Fear and said I think I will go out and pick berries today. Fear said No, you can t, and they got into a physical struggle. She struggled and struggled for hours to get past Fear, until she was too exhausted to continue struggling. 3
The next day she got up and Fear was a little bit smaller. She said Today, I will pick berries. This happened for two more days, and both days Fear got a little bit smaller. And finally one day she got up and said Today I will pick berries. Now Fear, who used to tower over her, was only about waist high. She walked up to Fear, pushed him down, and went out to pick berries. She had a great day, and when she came home that night Fear was even smaller. The next day she got up and kicked Fear out of the way, hardly even thinking about it. She went out that day to do as she wanted. As she was picking berries, suddenly a bear came along and thought they were his berries. Suddenly, she realized that she must run for her life. She started running, but the bear was right behind her. She thought the bear would get her. All of a sudden, there was Fear big as ever to grab her by the hand and pull her as fast as you can imagine, so that she got away from the bear. She went back to her cabin exhausted, and Fear was angry. He said I told you this would happen. I told you something bad would get you. She went to sleep, and in the morning Fear was as large as ever. She thought about it, and said Why are you back so large? He replied Because you must learn to deal with me every day. She began the process again, and eventually got fear down to a tiny size. She thought It would be bad to be without fear, but I must manage it in its right dimension. So she picked up Fear and put him in her pocket. She still carries around fear everywhere, but it doesn t dictate her life anymore. Leadership questions: As leaders, it is important to know how to manage fear, not to think you can get rid of it. It s important also in a leadership role to remember that the tactics you use are crucially important. Many of you decide that you will leave your love of teaching courses and interfacing with students, and become more of an administrator or more of a director over a program because you want to make it better. But then you find that you are on the dark side. You know more than you ever wanted to know about how an institution actually works, and now you have to make choices about the tactics you will use. Will you use the tactics that you always abhorred, so that you can win? Of course what you are trying to win is important, and you want to make things better. But will you give up values and principals if you win using those tactics? Story: The Boy and The Rattlesnake I will tell you the story of the boy and the rattlesnake. The rattlesnake was old and dying. The boy saw it, and knew he should stay away. The rattlesnake said, Oh, I am dying. I want one more time to get to the mountaintop and see the beauty of the sunset. The boy replied, No, I won t come near you. Rattlesnakes kill us. The rattlesnake said, I promise if you help me this day I will not kill you. The boy replied, No, they have taught me that I should not go near a rattlesnake. The rattlesnake again said I am promising you this day if you help me I will not kill you. So the boy finally picked up the rattlesnake and took him to the top of the mountain. They had a wonderful day, and the boy came to understand that the rattlesnake lived a long life and had much wisdom. The boy loved being with the rattlesnake, and took it home with him. The next morning, the rattlesnake said, It is time for me to die. Would you take me back to where you found me? So the boy, thinking of the friendship he has formed with the rattlesnake, agreed to take him. The boy picked up the rattlesnake, and it bit him. The boy said, Why have you done this? The rattlesnake replied, I kept my word. I did not bite you that day this is another day. You knew what I was when you picked me up. Leadership lessons: This is a hard lesson we teach our young people. You must understand that if you think you have a deal with or have found a way to manage the rattlesnake, it still does not cease being a rattlesnake. Or in one of the Indian proverbs (not American Indian, but Asian Indian), they say, The cobra will bite you, whether you call him Mr. Cobra or not. 4
Story: Clan Mother Weighsthe-Truth The last story I want to tell you is a story about how, when you get into a leadership position, you must use your judgment. Whether your leadership is because you are a teacher of students, or your leadership is because you have an administrative role. This story is adapted from a book called Thirteen Original Clan Mothers, by Jamie Sams. It s called The Story of Clan Mother Weighs-the- Truth. When you try to convince people of the right way to get along, make sure that you use the wisdom of the elders that have come before you. There was a particular leader in the tribe who knew how best to weigh the truth, so one day the tribe brought to her two women who were quarreling bitterly. One of them, named Blue- Goose-Woman, had taken more than her share of the common store of food. Everyone was outraged that she had not participated in the tribe as she should. But you see, they learned that she had taken more than her share because another woman Running-Water- Woman had told on her. Running- Water-Woman always knew everything going on the tribe, and always liked to share all the works of other people with everyone that she could. She had exposed Blue-Goose-Woman. Weighs-the-Truth knew that there was more to this story than appears. You see, Running-Water-Woman had not been loved by her father or her mother. She did not know how to live with other people. All she knew was how to get attention she didn t know how to work, how to love, and how to be loved. And so the reason she told stories about everyone else was because getting attention for her gossip was the only way she knew how to connect to others in the tribe. Weighs-the-Truth also knew that Blue- Goose-Woman had lost one of her children during a famine years ago. She knew that Blue-Goose-Woman was so afraid that her current child might starve that she was taking a little extra food every time. So what Weighs-the-Truth decided, much to everyone s surprise, was that Blue-Goose-Woman had to visit every member of the tribe who had lost a child in famine, and talk to them about their stories. Running-Water-Woman would have to accompany Blue-Goose- Woman on all of those visits, but could not speak a word during. They spent months making all the visits. When they returned, Weighsthe-Truth said, It is time for me to decide how to correct the problem that has been made by the two of you. First I want you to explain to everyone in the tribe what you have learned. What Blue-Goose-Woman explained was that everyone has losses. Everybody suffers. What is important is that we learn to overcome this together, not that we be greedy or live in fear. Running-Water-Woman explained that by being silent and listening, she could learn much more about what s going on inside of the tribe and inside of the people. And so the punishment for these two bitterly quarrelling women was to become lifelong friends, and to share in great leadership for the tribe because of what they had learned. Conclusion So my message to you is that in spite of the fact that we think we can learn new techniques without leadership, the wisdom of leadership surrounds us all the time. In your frog journey and in your choice of tactics, make sure that you confront your fears in a balanced way. When you try to convince people of the right way to get along, make sure that you use the wisdom of the elders that have come before you. 5