Good Character and its Explanation

IDC Study Circle (Class notes) The Muslim Way www.thewayofthemuslim.wordpress.com Good Character and its Explanation Dates delivered: 06/12/11 Info@idc-online.org 1

Introduction Seerah (biography of the Prophet, peace be upon him) the maintenance of the Ka baa. Before Prophethood, the Ka baa required maintenance and the Black Stone to be put back into its place. Dispute arose over which tribe from amongst the tribes would have the honour in placing the Black Stone. Further disputes over a few days potential civil war. Abu Umayyah (oldest of the Quraysh) used his influence: Let the first person to pass through the gate of the Haram (precincts of the Holy Kaaba) be our arbitrator and that all of us accept his view on the problem so it will be solved. Everyone accepted his proposal and waited to see who would pass through the gate first. The footsteps of Prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him), entered through the gates. Everyone shouted with approval: "Here comes Al-Ameen (The Trustworthy)! We will accept his verdict! We are content by his decision. He asked for a sheet to be put down and all the tribe representatives took a piece of the cloth. Black stone in the middle and they all got to pick the stone, with Prophet (peace be upon him) placing it in its place. Al-Ameen. This is what the Prophet (peace be upon him) was known as. o Respected and loved by the people because of his trustworthiness and dealings with the people. o Then came prophethood they called him a liar, a mad man. Just because he called to worship Allah alone! Allah says: "You are not, [O Muhammad], by the favour of your Lord, a madman. And indeed, for you is a reward uninterrupted. And indeed, you are of a great moral character." (68:2-4) Allah praised the Prophet (peace be upon him) and reassured him. Told him of a great reward Then Allah focussed on the characteristic of the Prophet - mentioning his noble manners (Akhlaaq). What is Akhlaaq? Something all Muslims know it is important to have. o But can be very difficult to put into practice. Introductory topic - covering the various aspects of akhlaq within this subject. The importance behind it. Definition Manners, character of a person Shaykh Abu Bakr al-jaza iry (Minhaj al-muslim, Vol 1, pp287): 2

o Character is deeply rooted in the heart, where the decision is made for every deed - good or evil, virtuous or disgraceful. o Upbringing plays an important role in determining the good or evil of one's character. o When these traits result in the desire for virtue and truth, love of good deed, longing to perform charitable things and when this is the basic source of motivation to habitually do good deeds, then this is called "good character" o Similarly without proper upbringing and training, and the opposite of what is mentioned above - this is called "bad character" Character also be defined as set of words, actions and habits that we display, which stem from our heart and thoughts. Three types of akhlaaq 1. Towards Allah (i.e. Love, hope, fear, good thoughts etc. How you are towards Him. 2. Towards Creation (i.e. Muslims, non-muslims, nature including animals and the land) 3. Towards Yourself (i.e. your body, physical and spiritual have rights over you) Importance behind Akhlaaq. Great degree of importance given to akhlaaq in the Qur an and Sunnah. Mention a few of these points. 1. Akhlaq is part of a comprehensive advice given by Allah and the Prophet (peace be upon him) Many places when Allah or the Prophet (peace be upon him) command or advise on something, it is related to akhlaaq. Allah says, "Worship Allah, and do not associate partners with him. And be good to your parents, and the relatives, and to the orphans, and to the poor people, and the neighbour that is close to you and the neighbour that is not close to you, and your companion on the journey." (4:36) Notice emphasis first on Tawheed (i.e. akhlaaq towards Allah FIRST) THEN to others. The advise of Luqman to his son in Qur'an: And [mention, O Muhammad], when Luqman said to his son while he was instructing him, "O my son, do not associate [anything] with Allah. Indeed, association [with him] is great injustice." And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination. But if they endeavour to make you associate with Me that of which you have no knowledge, do not obey them but accompany them in [this] world with appropriate kindness and follow the way of those who turn back to Me [in 3

repentance]. Then to Me will be your return, and I will inform you about what you used to do. [And Luqman said], "O my son, indeed if wrong should be the weight of a mustard seed and should be within a rock or [anywhere] in the heavens or in the earth, Allah will bring it forth. Indeed, Allah is Subtle and Acquainted. O my son, establish prayer, enjoin what is right, forbid what is wrong, and be patient over what befalls you. Indeed, [all] that is of the matters [requiring] determination. And do not turn your cheek [in contempt] toward people and do not walk through the earth exultantly. Indeed, Allah does not like everyone selfdeluded and boastful. And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of sounds is the voice of donkeys." (31:13-19) Whenever Allah's messenger was asked for comprehensive advice, he would frequently mention akhlaaq. Muadh ibn Jabal asked the Prophet (peace be upon him) for advice. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: Fear Allah wherever you are. Follow up a bad deed with a good deed and it will blot it out. And deal with people in a good manner. [Sunan al-tirmidhî] A man came to the Prophet (peace be upon him) one day and said "Advise me". The Prophet (peace be upon him) said "Don't become angry. Don't become angry. Don't become angry"... "When one of you gets angry while he is standing up, he should sit down. Then anger will leave him, and if not then he should lie down" (Ahmad) Nawas ibn Sam'an reported that the Prophet of Allah (peace be upon him) was asked about doing good and evil. He replied, "Doing good is having good manners. Doing evil is what troubles you inside and what you would not like others to know about." (Bukhari) The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said: "Do not belittle any small act of kindness even if it is to pour water from your bucket into the vessel of the one who asks for it or to talk to your brother with a cheerful face." 4

Anas said, "I served the Prophet of Allah, upon him be peace, for ten years. During that time, he never once said to me as much as 'Oof' if I did something wrong. He never asked me, if I had failed to do something, 'Why did you not do it?,' and he never said to me, if I had done something wrong, 'Why did you do it?' "(Bukhari) 2. Akhlaaq is a blessing that a person is given in this life. If Allah has blessed you with good manners, then you cannot beautify yourself with anything better this. o Some aspects of akhlaaq are natural (i.e. natural shyness, always smiling etc). o But it can all be developed: Evidence: The du'a when looking in the mirror (your reflection) "Allahumma ahsanta khalqi fa ahsin khulqi O Allah, You have made my physical appearance good, so make my character good also" (Ahmad) o This shows Allah may answer your du a and make your character better. 3. Having good akhlaaq can be greater or equal the reward of someone who worships Allah day and night. It is possible for a Muslim to reach the level of the one who does continual worship to Allah - fasting all day, praying all night by having good akhlaq. "If one has good manners, one may attain the same level of merit as those who spend their nights in prayer." (Bukhari) Question: Who amongst us fasts every day or prays every night? o Gives us hope and motivation to have good akhlaaq! 4. Having good akhlaq is a sign of good imaan or is a perfection of your imaan. A person who has good imaan must have good akhlaaq. 'The most perfect amongst the believers in faith is one who has the best manners and best of you are those who are best to their wives.'' (Ahmad) Analyse this hadith: The perfect of believers in their belief (imaan) is because of akhlaaq. Why did he mention the wives? o It is easy to do it outside with others, those who you meet once a day or once in a while (i.e. neighbours, co-workers etc) o But your wife is your life partner the one you are alone with, eat and drink with, sleep and wake up with. She shares everything with you private moments. o So when the man can show good akhlaaq to the one who is behind closed doors then this shows that he has reached the height of akhlaaq. This is a sign of imaan. 5

It may also be a sign of hypocrisy if they don t. The more imaan = more akhlaaq. The less imaan = less akhlaaq. "You will not enter paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another: 'spread salaam' (the greeting of peace) among you." (Muslim) Another way of showing how good akhlaaq is related to imaan. Side point: Do not cheapen the salaam by shortening it, changing it or mispronouncing it. (i.e. AS WS. Salamz ) When we give salaam we are asking that this person has tranquillity and peace from Allah on them virtuous saying that should be given its proper status. 5. Good akhlaaq is beloved to Allah and His messenger (peace be upon him) and is hated by Allah and His messenger (peace be upon him) The one who has it is more beloved to Allah, even if their deeds are deficient. "The most beloved of Allah's servants to Allah are those with the best manners." (at-tabarani) The Prophet (peace be upon him) also said: Those who are most beloved to me, and the closest to me in the Hereafter, are those who have the best akhlaq (character) amongst you. (Hasan according to Shaykh Al-Albani) This is also true for the general person. o The one who has good manners, friendly easy to get on with - the people are happy to be in their company. o The one who is rude or obnoxious, people avoid them because of their bad manners. o Yasir Qadhi: When a person becomes of a coarse heart, of a vulgar nature, always criticizing, always arrogant, always being sarcastic, always looking down at people, a person does not wish to be around him. These are the people whom Allah hates, no matter what they call themselves, no matter how much they fast and pray. Akhlaaq weighs the heaviest on the scales on the Day of Judgement There are lots of things that weighs heavy on the scales. For example, the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: There are two statements that are light for the tongue to remember, heavy in the Scales and are dear to the Merciful: `Subhan-Allahi wa bihamdihi, Subhan-Allahil-Adheem [Glory be to Allah and His is the praise, (and) Allah, the Greatest is free from imperfection)'.'' (Al-Bukhari and Muslim) 6

But the Prophet (peace be upon him) also said: "Nothing is weightier on the Scale of Deeds than one's good manners." (Bukhari) Imagine the Day of Judgment The Meezaan (Scales) are brought forth and all our deeds will be weighed. The good deeds placed on the right side and the evil deeds placed on the left side. What are the things that will help a believer? The good manners Even if a person has not fasted voluntary fasts or prayed a lot of voluntary prayers. o Good akhlaaq should not be trivialised. Allah says, Everyone shall taste death. And only on the Day of Resurrection shall you be paid your wages in full. And whoever is removed away from the Fire and admitted to Paradise, he indeed is successful. The life of this world is only the enjoyment of deception (a deceiving thing). (3:185) The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) asked one group of his companions, Do you know who the bankrupt person is? They said, A bankrupt person amongst us is the one who has neither money nor property. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said, The bankrupt person of my nation is he who would come on the Day of Resurrection with prayer and fast and giving great amounts in charity. And at the same time, he would come having abused this one, and slandered that one, and consumed the wealth of the other unlawfully, and shed the blood of yet others and having beaten others. Then any person whom he has wronged will be given from his good deeds on that Day. And if his good deeds are exhausted until he clears the account concerning all of the people he has oppressed, the sins of those people whom he has wronged will be thrown unto his account and after that, he will be thrown into the hellfire. (Muslim) 6. The most common reason for a person reaching Paradise is because of their akhlaaq. Good akhlaaq is so powerful that - along with the taqwa of Allah (consciousness of Allah) it is the primary factor that will cause people to enter Jannah. 7

The Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked about the acts which lead most easily to Paradise, and he replied: 'Taqwa and good akhlaaq.' [Sunan al-tirmidhi] Good akhlaaq reaches its peak when it is combined with knowledge. Akhlaaq and imaan are perfected when a person learns their deen. Abu Huraira (may Allah be pleased with him) said, "I heard Abul Qasim (the Prophet, peace be upon him), say: The best among you in Islam are those with the best manners, so long as they develop a sense of understanding." (Bukhari) The height of imaan and taqwa comes when a person is knowledgeable and has good akhlaaq. o This does not mean a person does not benefit without knowledge (6 points above say otherwise!) But it shows that this is the height / perfection of Islam. I have ONLY been sent... "I have ONLY been sent to perfect the good manners" (Haakim) Question: How does this relate to the whole of the Prophet's mission? As mentioned earlier, akhlaaq is 3 types: 1. Towards Allah 2. Towards Creation 3. Towards Self Akhlaaq towards Allah The most important one. Akhlaaq towards Allah - our characteristics and manners with Allah. o What do you think of Allah? What are your hopes with Allah? How much do you fear of Allah? How much do you love Allah? o Love, fear, and hope are the primary components of tawheed. Akhlaaq towards Creation With the Muslims, non-muslims, even akhlaaq with the animals. This type is not as important as the first But when a person has done the first, then they move into this one. Akhlaaq towards Self Your own body has a right over you. 8

"O 'Abdullah! Have I not been formed that you fast all the day and stand in prayer all night?" I said, "Yes, O Allah's Apostle!" He May Allah's peace and praise be on him said, "Do not do that! Observe the fast sometimes and also leave them (the fast) at other times; stand up for the prayer at night and also sleep at night. Your body has a right over you, your eyes have a right over you and your wife has a right over you." (Bukhari) When all three types of akhlaaq are understood, then we can appreciate why the Prophet (peace be upon him) was sent only for this reason. How to achieve good akhlaaq Easy and difficult at the same time! o Easy because we don t need to spend lots of money, time, physical effort (i.e. like salaah / fasting) o Difficult because it s a constant struggle in controlling and guarding oneself, keeping ourselves in check. Taking the middle path Important to avoid the two extremes by overemphasising some and ignoring others. Some emphasise akhlaaq towards creation and ignore the akhlaaq towards Allah o "So long as I m a good person and I m good to the people it doesn t matter if I don t pray / commit major sin. Allah will forgive me! Others emphasise akhlaaq towards Allah and ignore the akhlaaq towards creation. o So long as I ve understood the correct aqeedah and manhaj, I should be harsh with the people! They are all people of innovation until they adopt what I am upon No doubt the rights of Allah are given preference over the rights of mankind. o Not permitted to leave the wajibaat (the obligatory deeds like 5 times prayer), even if they did smile at their brother/sister. The above refers to when a person has completed their wajibaat THEN they show good akhlaaq preference of akhlaaq towards Allah. Those who go to the extreme of ignoring akhlaaq towards creation o Shows an element of weakness in imaan. o Goes against the characteristic of the Prophet (peace be upon him) Allah says about the Prophet (peace be upon him): And by the Mercy of Allah, you dealt with them gently. And had you been severe and harsh-hearted, they would have broken away from about you (3:159) 9

This is why it is important to have akhlaaq with knowledge knowledge tells you what to do and when to do it. "The best among you in Islam are those with the best manners, so long as they develop a sense of understanding." (Bukhari) Without knowledge, akhlaaq is not that powerful. But when combined with knowledge, then this is the height of eman. Introductory class on akhlaaq upcoming classes will cover various aspects of akhlaaq (i.e. patience, mercy, kindness etc) Food for thought Ibn 'Abbas said, "If you wish to mention the faults of your friend, mention your own faults first." Anonymous: "People can ruin our reputation. Only YOU can ruin your character" o People can defame, backbite, lie, slander you and destroy your reputation. o Character You are in full control. No-one can ruin it except you. o Reputation is what everybody thinks. Character is who we really are. Sources: Minhaj al-muslim by Shaykh Abu Bakr al-jaza iry I Have Only Been Sent to Perfect Good Manners by Yasir Qadhi 10