Lesson 36: Honesty Honesty Brings Happiness Read or paraphrase Sister Kapp s story: Ardeth G. Kapp, former Young Women General President, told about an experience she had with honesty. When she was a student at Brigham Young University, she accidentally left her wallet in a telephone booth. The wallet contained ten dollars, which was all the money she had at the time. She never found the wallet, but nine years later, she received a note from a woman who said she wanted to settle some unfinished business at BYU. Sister Kapp called the woman and found out what had happened to the wallet. I learned that this young woman, now a wife and mother, had been in nurses training at BYU. She had worked to put herself through school, but she needed an additional ten dollars for tuition, so she turned to her boyfriend for help. She had promised to return the loan by the following Friday. When Friday arrived, in spite of her earnest prayers, she was still short ten dollars. Seemingly without reason, she had walked into the telephone booth and found an old worn wallet. She explained how her heart started to pound since she d never been tempted like this before. She held her breath as she opened it to find a single ten dollar bill. Then the question: Was this indeed an answer to her prayer? She interrupted her steady flow of words to explain that since then she had learned that Satan knows when we are being tested and when under pressure we might weaken. We can be sure, she explained, that he will be there if there is a chance we might fall. And then picking up the story again, she told of paying her boyfriend, whom she later married, graduating in nursing, and now raising a beautiful family and rejoicing in the blessings of the gospel. Her voice choked with emotion as she painfully related the details about the old wallet. She emphasized how she had been taught right from wrong and how she was well acquainted with the principle of honesty. Her conscience had prompted her, but she listened to the wrong voice and acted contrary to that which she knew was right. She explained how taking the money had seemed justified at the time and hardly seemed like a sin at all. But for nine years her faithful conscience had never been at peace in that particular matter. For nine years, through many moves, the old burden had lain deeply tucked away in her top dresser drawer. It seemed impossible for her to throw away the wallet, though she d considered it many times. There is no way you can throw 1
away a wrong, and yet, there was no way, as far as she knew, to return the wallet. One day while she was straightening the drawer, the old wallet surfaced again. This time she felt she must get rid of it, but only the right way. She had learned many valuable lessons over the years, and she had a quiet assurance that even this had served a purpose. She thoughtfully opened the old wallet once again, and while examining it this time her fingers uncovered a small, orange card tucked away in a tiny compartment not previously noticed. This orange card would prove to be the key to unloading her burden. The card gave the address of the Calgary Clinic in Alberta, Canada, where the medical exam for a student s visa had been given. She became excited with the thought that this time she might clean her top drawer in every detail. With a prayer in her heart she took a chance and sent a letter to whom it may concern to the Calgary Clinic to be forwarded if possible. It was forwarded first to my parents in Canada, and then back to Utah where it finally reached its intended destination. Contact had been made, but the wallet was yet to be returned. During the telephone conversation she indicated the wallet would be mailed that very day. Sister Kapp asked the young woman to come to her office and deliver the wallet in person, which the young woman did. As though she had rehearsed this experience in her mind a hundred times, she reached out her steady hand, looked me squarely in the eye, and handed me the wallet. Her steady gaze reflected the radiance of a good and honest life. Then her eyes dropped as she whispered, Will you please forgive me? I want to be honest. Words would not come. I could only reach for her hand and nod affirmatively. From my office, I watched her walk away from my desk and out the front door. Behold, he who has repented of his sins, the same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember them no more. (D&C 58:42.) I went to the window to watch her with her shoulders square, head erect, and with a lilt in her step as she turned the corner out of sight. Returning to my desk I again heard her words, Will you please forgive me? I want to be honest (Ardeth G. Kapp, Will You Please Forgive Me? I Want to Be Honest, New Era, July 1976, pp. 7 9). Who suffered most because of the stolen wallet? Why? In what ways does being honest bless our lives? (Others can trust us; we have a clear conscience and peace of mind.) 2
The Savior is our Example of Honesty Alma 7:20 I perceive that it has been made known unto you, by the testimony of his word, that he cannot a walk in crooked paths; neither doth he vary from that which he hath said; neither hath he a shadow of turning from the right to the left, or from that which is right to that which is wrong; therefore, his course is one eternal round. Ether 3:11-12: 11 And the Lord said unto him: Believest thou the words which I shall speak? 12 And he answered: Yea, Lord, I know that thou speakest the truth, for thou art a God of truth, and a canst not lie. Moses 4:30 For as I, the Lord God, liveth, even so my words cannot return void, for as they go forth out of my mouth they must be fulfilled. The Lord is totally honest. Whatever he says he will do, he does. There is not even an INKLING of dishonesty. He is strictly obedient to what he says. Hypothetical: What would our religion be if it was based on a God who was not honest? But He is and we TRUST Him. That trust, that reassurance that God will fulfill His promises is what gives us faith in Jesus Christ and hope for eternal life. Connection to the YW Likewise, we should strive to be honest. What is being honest? Honesty implies freedom from lying, stealing, cheating, and bearing false witness. Marion G. Romney. Who should we be honest with? Our friends, our family, ourselves, the Lord Part of being honest is being true to what we know is right upholding our principles and standards, even when it is unpopular or difficult to do so. As I 3
relate the following story, I d like you to think of times in your life when you have been honest or true to the standards in tough situations. Stories of Richard Edgley Paraphrase: After graduating college in 1955, Brother Edgley worked at the newly opened Jackson Lake Lodge in Moran, WY. At the end of the summer, his 1941 Hudson barely made the 185-mile trip back home. Upon arriving, his father happily came out to greet him, however, he saw three Jackson Lake Lodge towels in the backseat of his car. His father simply said, I expected more of you. To Richard, he had done nothing wrong. These towels were a rite of passage from a summer of hard work. The next weekend, Brother Edgley made the 370 round-trip journey again to return the towels. His father never asked why. It didn t need to be said. [Over 20 years later] while working in the corporate world, some business associates and I were passing through O Hare Airport in Chicago, Illinois. One of these men had just sold his company for tens of millions of dollars in other words, he was not poor. As we were passing a newspaper vending machine, this individual put a quarter in the machine, opened the door to the stack of papers inside the machine, and began dispensing unpaid-for newspapers to each of us. When he handed me a newspaper, I put a quarter in the machine and, trying not to offend but to make a point, jokingly said, Jim, for 25 cents I can maintain my integrity. A dollar, questionable, but 25 cents no, not for 25 cents. You see, I remembered well the experience of three towels and a broken-down 1941 Hudson. Why do you think Brother Edgley took the towels from the Lodge? Why do you think the man took the newspapers from the machine? If they expected people to be honest, they would make a better machine. The rules didn t apply to him He wanted to be liked by his friends for providing them papers. He didn t think there was anything wrong with it. 4
The man obviously felt bad because, A few minutes later we passed the same newspaper vending machine. I noticed that Jim had broken away from our group and was stuffing quarters in the vending machine. This story spoke to me because it should that no matter our circumstances age, career, place, or financial status we all have the choice to be honest and stand up for what we know is right. Does anyone have a story they would like to share about a time when they were honest or held to the standards? Young Women share stories (passes of Integrity #3!) Chalkboard Discussion Questions Why am I tempted to be dishonest? To feel accepted/loved/popular (D&C 3:7-8) We are worried about the consequences of the truth. We don t want to hurt someone s feelings. To protect someone else. To meet our needs (stealing money or clothes) Deception can make you feel superior. (I know something you don t.) When are we not living honestly? We cheat, lie, steal, bear false witness. Say we will do something, then we don t why is this dishonest? When we act contrary to what we know to be right. How are some people in the world living a double life? They may seem honest in one area of their life, but are not being honest in another. Perhaps an employee puts in a full day at work, but takes office supplies home every once and awhile. People live double lives digitally. They may be one person in person and a totally different person when they text, e-mail, go online, 5
facebook, chat, or play games. We should ask ourselves if our actions are the consistent despite our circumstances. One example in the scriptures of people living a double life were the Gadianton robbers (Helaman 6:22). They lived among the Nephites, yet they had their own secret signs and laws. On the surface, they seemed to be law-abiding citizens, but they were not. This deception ultimately led to the destruction of their entire civilization. Conclusion and Challenge As we know from President Hinckley, there is always room to stand a little taller, reach a little higher. I challenge each of you to find an area of your life where you feel you can be more honest and true to what you know is right, whether it is to your friends, your family or yourself. In personal progress under Integrity, you can complete 2,3, or 5 as you strive to be more honest. For the three weeks, I will be working on this goal. If you would like to join me, write down how you like to be contacted fb, text, e-mail or phone. Everyday for the next three weeks, I will contact you with an honesty reminder quote. Bear testimony Closing quote The Lord requires his people to be honest. May we desire with all our hearts to be honest in all our relationships and in all the things that we do. God will help us if we seek the strength that comes from him. Sweet then will be our peace of mind and our lives. Blessed will be those with whom we live and associate. And God will bless and guide us with his loving care ( We Believe in Being Honest, Ensign, Oct. 1990, p. 5). Close. 6