A Bible Study for Teen Girls Making Christ the Desire of Your Heart Hayley DiMarco best-selling author of God Girl
Making Christ the Desire of Your Heart by Hayley DiMarco LifeWay Press Nashville, TN
2012 LifeWay Press Reprinted 2013 No part of this work may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying and recording, or by any information storage or retrieval system, except as may be expressly permitted in writing by the publisher. Requests for permission should be addressed in writing to LifeWay Press, One LifeWay Plaza, Nashville, TN 37234-0144. ISBN: 9781415873113 Item Number: 005488880 Dewey Decimal Classification Number: 248.83 Subject Heading: GIRLS \ TEENAGERS \ SPIRITUAL LIFE Printed in the United States of America Student Ministry Publishing LifeWay Church Resources One LifeWay Plaza Nashville, TN 37234-0144 We believe that the Bible has God for its author; salvation for its end; and truth, without any mixture of error, for its matter and that all Scripture is totally true and trustworthy. The 2000 statement of The Baptist Faith and Message is our doctrinal guideline. Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are taken from the Holman Christian Standard Bible Copyright 1999, 2000, 2002, 2003, 2009 by Holman Bible Publishers. Used by permission. Holman Christian Standard Bible, Holman CSB, and HCSB are federally registered trademarks of Holman Bible Publishers. Scripture quotations marked The Message are from The Message. Copyright Eugene H. Peterson 1993, 1994, 1995. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group. Scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from The Holy Bible, New Living Translation, Copyright 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, IL 60189 USA. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked ESV are taken from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version (ESV ), Copyright 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved Scripture quotations marked GW are taken from The Holy Bible, the God s Word Translation (GW), Copyright 1995 by God s Word to the Nations. Used by permission of Baker Publishing Group. All rights reserved.
Contents About the Author.... 4 A Note from Hayley.... 5 How to Use this Study... 6 Week 1: The Anatomy of the Obsessed... 8 Week 2: The Life of the Obsessed... 26 Week 3: Obsessed with Loss....44 Week 4: Obsessed with Gain... 62 Week 5: Obsessed with Relief.... 82 Week 6: Obsessed with God....100 Teaching Plans.... 119
About the Author HAYLEY DIMARCO is a best-selling and award-winning author of over 30 books, including God Girl, Mean Girls, and Die Young. Hayley mentors young women online at GodGirl.com and she and her husband, Michael, run Hungry Planet, a company focused on producing books that combine hardhitting biblical truth with cutting-edge design in Nashville, Tenn. You can follow her online at Facebook.com/hayley.dimarco or Twitter.com/hayleydimarco.
A Note from Hayley WELCOME to Obsessed, the Bible Study. This study was born out of my book Obsessed, Breaking Free from the Things That Consume You, but you don t need the book in order to do the study, though it s not a bad idea. If you re obsessed and it s making you crazy, if you re obsessed to exhaustion, or even if you re enjoying your obsessions but wish you were more obsessed with God, then this is the study for you. All my life I ve been obsessed: with comfort, food, clothes, and love. And while some of it s been fun, most of it s been oppressive and all-consuming. But God s Word has the cure for the obsessed. And this study wants to take you there. Whether you are looking for a solo Bible study, one you can do with a friend, or with a group, then this study will work for you. Like I said, you don t have to read Obsessed (the book), but it would be a good supplement. The book covers a lot more stuff, while the Bible study dives deeper into Scripture so they are a good pair to have. I hope you enjoy the study, and my prayer is that by the end of this book you are completely obsessed with God! So let s dive in and see what it means to be obsessed.
6 OBSESSED FOR LEADERS How to Use This Study Weekly Study Obsessed: Making Christ the Desire of Your Heart is centered on an important truth: We were made to be obsessed with God and His call on our lives. Yet, so often, we give our hearts to lesser gods guys, appearance, popularity, grades, goals, sports, and even friends rather than Jesus. This six-week study will challenge teen girls to confront their obsessions through Scripture and allow Christ to redeem the desires of their hearts. Plan to teach this book over six weeks. Prior to each group meeting, the girls should work through that week s chapter. Teaching plans have been provided to help you plan your weekly meetings and are available on pages 119-135. You may want to kick off the study with a short informational meeting in which you distribute the books and get to know the girls. This would be a good time to get contact information for each of the girls and briefly introduce the theme of the Bible study. You may also want to provide snacks and other fun activities. Event-based study If you intend to use this study for an event (such as a retreat or DiscipleNow), you may need to adapt the sessions to fit the number of group Bible study times you will have during the event. Since most DNow models include five teaching sessions, you may want to use Week 1 s content as an introduction and direct the girls to complete Weeks 2-6 s work during quiet times or small groups. Use the leader helps on pages 119-135 to help plan your teaching times. Weekly Activities Each week s teaching plan will include: Opening: This activity is designed to introduce the girls to the week s topic and create an environment that s open to discussion. Review: Use this time to recap what the girls studied during their individual study over the past week. Discussion questions, quotes from Hayley s sessions, and other guides will be provided. Scripture Focus: Each week, you will help the girls to dig deeper into various Scripture passages they encountered during that week s study. Discussion questions and other activities will encourage the girls to investigate Scripture and see how it applies to their daily lives.
How to Use This Study Into Action: These activities will help the girls to internalize the week s topic and discussion. Through activities, crafts, and journaling, among other things, the girls will be asked to evaluate their lives and be honest before God about what the activities revealed. Closing: Each weekly session will conclude with prayer. Girls will pray silently and corporately, often using the prepared prayers featured on pages 24, 43, 61, 81, 99, 117. Additional Suggestions Here are a few additional ideas that might help you as you teach Obsessed: Journaling Provide each girl with an inexpensive journal during the first group meeting. Encourage the girls to record any thoughts or truths God reveals as they complete each week s work. Also, invite girls to use their journals during their personal prayer times. The journals will create honest dialogue between the girl and God. You may want to set aside time during each group meeting to allow girls to journal about what they ve learned and how they will respond to what God is asking them to do. Invite girls to draw, pen poems, write songs, or write letters to God in their journals. Praying for each other Girls need to understand that they were never meant to deal with their wrong obsessions and the hard parts of life on their own. God has given us His Holy Spirit, but He has also created the church and brought others alongside us to help bear our burdens. Create an environment among your girls that puts these truths into practice. You may want to begin each session with a time of prayer for one another, or you may want to include prayer requests and intercession as part of the closing during each group meeting. Whatever you do, take time to ask for prayer requests and be faithful to pray over them. You may want to create a Facebook group for your Bible study so you can share, update, and remind girls about prayer requests and other announcements throughout the week. Accountability Partners Because of the subject matter of this Bible study, accountability partners may become vital to helping girls confront wrong obsessions in their lives. At the first session, set up accountability partners. The girls should hold each other accountable to not only read each week s assignment, but also to admit areas of wrong obsession in their lives and to seek God when temptations to fall back into old obsessions arise.
9 1 The Anatomy of the Obsessed OBSESSED To be obsessed is to be relentless in your attention to or pursuit of something. When you re obsessed, you can t get that obsession your dream, that guy, your goal weight, or whatever out of your mind. It s what controls and defines you. Think about it: If you find out what a person thinks about the most, you find out who that person really is. The obsessed are defined by their obsession. A musician is considered a genius because he works to obsession. An artist is remembered forever because she was obsessed by her art. To be obsessed is to devote your life, body, and soul to something or to someone. If you re obsessed with something, it consumes and rules over you. You re a slave to thoughts or actions that seem beyond yourself yet in reality, at some level, stem from your own desires. To be obsessed is to be unable to walk away from the object of your obsession without considerable struggle or pain. Which leads to a very important point: If you re obsessed with something, that obsession controls you. It rules over you, dominates your thoughts, and governs the way you live your life. And depending on who or what it is that controls you, your obsession can make or ruin your life. The truth is, most of us are obsessed with something or someone. Some might even say that being obsessed is what makes life fun. When you re obsessed with something, you re so in love with it that it gets you out of bed in the morning. It brings a smile to your face. Your obsession compels you to action, to achievement, to success. In fact, in order to be successful at anything,
10 OBSESSED you have to have at least some degree of obsession. You can t become a medical doctor without some obsession for learning and a devotion to healing. You can t become a great athlete, actor, writer, or artist without being obsessed with doing what you need to do in order to succeed at your craft. But obsession isn t always a fun thing. Sometimes, we can become so consumed by our obsessions that it ends up destroying us, or, at the very least, debilitating us. Drug addicts are obsessed with the feelings the drugs give or take away. Someone who cuts is obsessed with the sense of relief the blade brings. The anorexic is obsessed with the image in the mirror. Every one of these people are not only controlled by their obsession; they re also being destroyed by it. Obsessed [verb] preoccupy or fill the mind of (someone) continually, intrusively, and to a troubling extent [ intrans. ] (of a person) be preoccupied in this way Understand this: Your obsession determines your destiny. To obsess is to put your life on a trajectory. Find your obsession, and you find your future. So before we step into this study, let s take a quick inventory of your life. Are you obsessed with anything? Not sure? Answer the questions below. What do you think about the most? (Top three things) What can you not live without? What are you the best at? What are you known for? What do you love the most? Who do you love the most?
The Anatomy of the Obsessed 11 What do you spend most of your time thinking about? What do you wish you could spend most of your time doing? What is something that you do a lot that you wish you could stop? What do you want more than anything? What would you do to get it? What do you fear the most? Do you think about revenge? How much? What is something you could never give up? (not including air, water, and food) What do you hate most? What s the first thing you think about in the morning? What do you worry about the most? What do you feel really guilty about? What s something that has happened in the past that you can t get over? If you could only do one thing the rest of your life, what would it be? What do you want to be remembered as? Explain. So, how was it? Were those questions hard to answer? Look over your answers now. Think about the things about your life that you would change if you could. Circle the ones you would love to be able to change. The fact is, if you were able to give an answer to any of these questions, then you may be obsessed. This quiz isn t a perfect diagnosis, but it is a good starting point for thinking about the topic of obsession. My hope is that right
12 OBSESSED now, you re beginning to think about the things you obsess over and about and if those obsessions are healthy or if they re damaging you. The Famous Obsessed Ones Our history books are filled with obsessed people. They have fought wars and won battles. Obsessed people have discovered cures, developed inventions, and raised buildings. The obsessed fill the pages of Scripture and they re portrayed in both good and bad light. Take, for example, the story of the Tower of Babel in Genesis 11. The Tower of Babel will forever stand as a fallen symbol of the obsessed. The people at that time all had one language and lived together in the land of Shinar. And as they started to talk about life, fame, success, and their future, they said: Come, let s build a great city for ourselves with a tower that reaches into the sky. This will make us famous and keep us from being scattered all over the world. Genesis 11:4 (NLT) What were the people obsessed over? What did they do in order to get what they wanted? What did God think of their obsession? Take a look at verse 6 7 to find out: The Lord said, If they have begun to do this as one people all having the same language, then nothing they plan to do will be impossible for them. Come, let Us go down there and confuse their language so that they will not understand one another s speech. Genesis 11:6 7 What did the Tower of Babel symbolize according to God? Why did God say nothing would be impossible for these people? What did God do in order to curb the peoples obsession?
The Anatomy of the Obsessed 13 Babel was located on the Plain of Shinar, which was located in modern-day Iraq. The fact is, when we obsess over anything or anyone other than God, we may have success. When we put our minds to something, we can accomplish a lot and in doing so, we may make a name for ourselves. But when we obsess over things that bring us glory rather than God (which is what happened at the Tower of Babel), the ultimate outcome is disastrous if not in this life, then in the next. And the Bible is filled with such stories. Another famous story of obsession in Scripture is the story of Cain and Abel. They were the first kids of our first parents, Adam and Eve. And they were brothers with very different obsessions. When it came time to give offering to God, they both brought what they had to give. But God was only pleased with Abel s offering. This made Cain mad so mad that when he got the chance, he killed his brother in anger. Take some time right now to read this story. You ll find it in Genesis 4:1-9. Now think about what you ve read and focus on verses 6-7. The interesting words from this Scripture come from God when He asked Cain about his anger: The LORD said to Cain, Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is for you, but you must rule over it. Genesis 4:6 7 (ESV) Cain was obsessed with his brother s acceptance, so much so that he killed for it. And because of his actions, he will be forever remembered as the first
14 OBSESSED murderer. His obsession defined him. But let s ponder what God said about obsession in verse 7. Who or what does sin want? According to this verse, what are you to do to sin? What does that mean? What is the opposite of ruling over sin? Explain. Did Cain rule over sin or did he let sin or his obsession rule over him? Explain. Cain s obsession changed his life. Read Genesis 4:10-14; answer these questions: How did God say Cain s life would be different because of his sin? What does it mean that Cain would work the ground, but it wouldn t give him any yield? Why is that important? The Obsessed Are Memorable. Their singular focus can bring them great infamy or regard. The builders of the Tower of Babel and Cain will forever be remembered for their obsessions their dangerous, damaging, ungodly obsessions. But the Bible is also filled with many men and women who were obsessed with following God. Because of that obsession, they changed history. Men like Isaac, Abraham, and Jacob were all obsessed over God so much that they still stand as the pillars of our faith today. (See Matt. 22:32 to learn more.) Women like Rahab (Josh. 2:1-22,6:17-27), Hannah (1 Sam. 1 2), Anna (Luke 2:36-40), and Mary (John 12:1-8) plus many more were compelled to action and lives of honor because of their laser focus on following God and doing His will.
The Anatomy of the Obsessed 15 Faith Is Obsessed One of Jesus parables talked about a guy who was obsessed in the right way. He was a model that Jesus wanted to give you for your obsession. So let s look: The kingdom of heaven is like treasure, buried in a field, that a man found and reburied. Then in his joy he goes and sells everything he has and buys that field. Matthew 13:44 What is the subject of this short parable? What is the kingdom of heaven? Explain. What did Jesus compare it to in this verse? Why? What was the man obsessed with in this passage? According to this verse, what kind of emotion comes from having the right kind of obsession? How did the man in this passage prove his obsession? Explain. Obsession requires commitment and devotion. Obsession requires all of you. You can t be partially obsessed. You can t find something of great value to you, then only work half-heartedly to get it. When you are obsessed, you work whole-heartedly to get the object of your obsession, like the man who found the treasure in Jesus parable. You become singularly focused on your goal. Now get this: Obsession is the foundation of faith. In fact, without obsession, faith isn t possible. Where do I get this idea you ask? Jesus said it in the Gospel of Mark when He was asked which commandment was the most important. His answer was simple and clear: Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength. Mark 12:30