Congregation Mishkan Tefila Bar/Bat Mitzvah Guide Congregation Mishkan Tefila Revised July 2013
Bar/Bat Mitzvah Information Your child s Bat and Bat Mitzvah is an important moment in the life of your family. So much of what we wish for our children, for ourselves and for our community comes together during the Bar and Bat Mitzvah experience. The years leading up to this milestone event are full of preparation. It is our goal to take the mystery out of what is expected and what needs to be done and help to make this experience as meaningful as possible for your entire family. Jewish Education Your child should be enrolled in Mishkan Tefila s Hebrew School Ma or (K-6) and Makor (7-8) or a day school. The curriculum in the Hebrew School is directly linked to Bar and Bat Mitzvah preparation, including familiarity with the Friday evening Kabbalat Shabbat service; Saturday morning services; instruction in Torah and Haftorah chanting and the recitation of the appropriate blessings. Membership You must be a member in good standing for at least one year prior to the assignment of your Bar/Bat Mitzvah date and all outstanding balances must be paid in full prior to your event. Mitzvah Project In anticipation of your child assuming adult responsibilities in the Jewish community, it is customary to choose a tzedakah/ mitzvah project that is meaningful and in keeping with your child s interests. We are excited to partner with JChoice, a social network that encourages Jewish teens to become involved in various mitzvah activities and organizations, some of which have been traditionally overlooked by Jewish philanthropies. Tutoring Tutoring typically begins approximately eight months in advance of your child s Bar or Bat Mitzvah. Should your child be away during the summer months, this timetable can be adjusted. A member of the Cantorial staff will be in touch to arrange tutoring lessons. Approximately three months before the service, the Rabbi will make an appointment with you to discuss the service, the assigning of honors and to review your child s talk. Bar/Bat Mitzvah Fee The Bar/Bat Mitzvah fee of $875 covers the cost of tutoring and a range of services. This fee will be charged to your CMT account as soon as a Bar/Bat Mitzvah date is assigned. The Bar/Bat Mitzvah fee applies even if you choose to make alternative tutoring arrangements. Tallit, Teffilin and Kippa The Bar/Bat Mitzvah time is a good opportunity to purchase ritual items for your child. We encourage both our sons and our daughters to wear a tallit and kippa at the service (though both are optional for girls in our congregation). This is also a wonderful opportunity to purchase and learn about teffilin, which are worn during the weekday service. Room Rentals It is wonderful for the members of our Congregation to see your child reach this milestone event and share in your celebration. At Mishkan Tefila, it is customary that the Bar/Bat Mitzvah family sponsor a Congregational Kiddush. We prefer that the Kiddush be joint, however, we realize that a private Kiddush may be requested. Please see the pricing guidelines below for private Kiddush room rentals and associated fees. Please note that we are unable to allow you to host a private Kiddush without sponsorship of a Congregational Kiddush. Our Executive Director has a list of approved caterers. Coppleman Clarke Social Hall: $2,000 Half of the Coppleman Clarke Social Hall: $1,000 Schwartz Social Hall: $800 There is a $300 caterer fee for the use of the synagogue s kitchen facilities. continued
continued Evening Celebration Room Rentals Our facilities are well equipped and available for your evening celebrations. It is essential that you book the reception hall as soon as possible to ensure that it is available. Base rental charges for reception halls, for members, are as follows: Coppleman Clarke Social Hall, Lobby and the Usen Lounge (Bowling Alley): $4,000 Schwartz Social Hall: $900 There is a $750 charge for members to open the wall between the Coppleman Clarke Social Hall and the Usen Lounge (Bowling Alley). Contracts Prices are subject to change until a contract is signed. A 50% non-refundable deposit is due at the time of signing. The outstanding balance is due prior to your event. Chairs and Linens Available for rental upon request. Chair Rentals There is a $200 handling charge for the first 200 chairs rented from an outside source. An additional $200 handling charge will be applied to any additional chairs. Classmates Keep in mind that your child has attended years of Hebrew School with his/her classmates and this is a wonderful opportunity for your child s classmates to share in the celebration. Formal Photographs Please make arrangements to take photographs in the sanctuary, on a weekday or a Sunday, with the synagogue office. Timing Our Shabbat morning services begin promptly at 9:30am. Please plan to arrive by 9:15am. Kippot Kippot must be worn in the sanctuary. Families are welcome to provide their own kippot or to use those that are available at the synagogue entrance. Please be sure to complete the following forms: 1. Bar/Bat Mitzvah Form 2. Aliyot and Honors Form 3. Vendor Information Form All families must meet with Rabbi Gordon; Josh Blumenthal, Executive Director and Wendy Handler, Director of Youth and Family Programs, prior to their simcha. Mazel Tov!!! CMT Office: 617.332.7770 Rabbi Lenny Gordon rabbi@ Cell: 215.630.3578 Josh Blumenthal executivedirector@ Wendy Handler wendyhandlercmt@gmail.com Taking pictures in or around the synagogue, during Shabbat, is not permitted. Congregation Mishkan Tefila Revised January 2014
Please fill out this form if your child will be celebrating a Bar or Bat Mitzvah at Congregation Mishkan Tefila. Include all information and any additional notes that might be helpful. We are here to make this day as joyful and meaningful as possible for your family. You may not have made all of these decisions yet, please fill in what you know as of now. Bar/Bat Mitzvah Form Today s Date Child s Name School Grade Please select one of the following: Ma or (K-6) and Makor (grades 7 & 8) Day School Adult 1 Name Adult 2 Name Primary Address City State Zip Home Phone ( ) Cell Phone Adult 1 ( ) Cell Phone Adult 2 ( ) E-mail Adult 1 E-mail Adult 2 Tutoring: Through CMT Other (Specify): Service and Celebration Plans: Additional Notes:
Vendor Information Bar/Bat Mitzvah Celebrant Date of Bar/Bat Mitzvah Parents Name(s) Parents Contact Information Party Planner and Contact Information Congregational Kiddush or Private Kiddush Kiddush Reception Room Evening Celebration Reception Rooms Please provide the following information for each that apply: Name: Phone Number: Email Address: Caterer Band D.J. Photographer Florist Video Linens Table Rental Beverages Other Entertainment Date Signature
Kiddush Menu Options Pricing for 2013-2014 We have designed three Kiddush Menu options below. Kiddush Menu options are specially priced for CMT members. Prices are based on 100 guests. If you order one of the three standard menu options, you will be billed directly by the synagogue. Any deviations from the standard menus must be negotiated with the caterer and you will be billed by the caterer. Menu Option 1: Bagel with cream cheese Fusilli Pasta Salad Rugalach Mini Muffins Freshly Baked Brownies $600 Menu Option 2: Bagel with cream cheese Tuna Salad Spring Salad (accompaniments to vary by week) Israeli Couscous Salad with Cranberries Fruit Platters Pastry $600 Menu Option 3: Asian Spinach Salad with Almonds and Mandarin Orange Segments (Almonds and oranges on side) Bagels with cream cheese Tuna Salad Pasta Salad Pastry $600 Additional Items: Cheese Noodle Kugel...$40 Fruit Noodle Kugel...$40 (Kugel sold in half hotel pans) Herring Fillets in Wine Sauce...$5.00/lb Tuna Fish Salad...$8.50/lb Egg Salad...$7.50/lb Whitefish Salad...$9.50/lb Large Fruit Platter (serves 35-40)...$95 Sliced Lox Platter (serves 35-40)...$130 Prices as of July 2013. Prices are subject to change.
Aliyot and Honors Hebrew Name of Bar/Bat Mitzvah Celebrant Parent 1 English Name Parent 1 Hebrew Name Parent 2 English Name Parent 2 Hebrew Name It is customary for each celebrant s family to assign three Torah blessing honors (aliyot), for the celebrant s parents and for the bar/bat mitzvah themselves. A Hebrew and transliterated copy of the blessings is included. Please make sure that those who receive this honor are familiar with the blessings. Other available honors include opening and closing the Ark (three sets of two honors), dressing the torah (gelilah), and a number of English readings. The rabbi will review all available honors with you. The ushers will be responsible, with your assistance, for directing these individuals to take part in the service at the appropriate time.
Bar/Bat Mitzvah Logistics and Details Child s Name Parent s Name Parent s Contact Number Home ( ) Cell ( ) Parents Email Addresses Bar/Bat Mitzvah Date Portion Member in Good Standing Jewish Education B/M fee billed B/M fee received Tutor Congregational Kiddush Billed Rec d Private Kiddush Room Billed Rec d Friday Evening Service Participation Saturday Morning Shacharit Service Mincha/Ma ariv Service Evening Party Room Reserved Billed Rec d Meeting with Rabbi Meeting with Tony Mitzvah Project Additional Notes
Resources and Devar Torah The following books are great resources as you prepare for your child s Bar or Bat Mitzvah: Bar Mitzvah: A Guide to Spiritual Growth by Marc-Alain Ouaknin. This book applies to the Bat Mitzvah as well. Make Your Own Bar/Bat Mitzvah: A Personal Approach to Creating a Meaningful Rite of Passage by Rabbi Goldie Milgram Jewish Family and Life: Traditions, Holidays, and Values for Today s Parents and Children by Yosef I. Abramowitz, Susan Silverman Danny Siegel Bar and Bat Mitzvah Mitzvah Book: A Practical Guide for Changing the World Through Your Simcha by Danny Siegel Putting God On The Guest List: How To Reclaim The Spiritual Meaning Of Your Child s Bar or Bat Mitzvah by Jeffrey K. Salkin For Kids Putting God on Your Guest List: How to Claim the Spiritual Meaning of Your Bar or Bat Mitzvah by Jeffrey K. Salkin It s a Mitzvah!: Step-By-Step to Jewish Living by Bradley Shavit Artson Your Devar Torah should include the following: I. Welcome II. Summary: What is my parsha about? III. Go into depth about one thing in the parsha that interests me. Research this thing. Read the commentators, and formulate you own ideas. IV. What does this parsha mean to ME and to my experience of becoming a bar/bat mitzvah? V. Thank you! Although there are many different techniques for writing a Devar Torah, you should take into account the following suggestions. Read your text. Read it again. Make sure you understand every word. If there is a word you don t know, you can look it up in a dictionary or ask someone. Think. Is there something about the text that interests you? Disturbs or frustrates you? Confuses you? Write down your ideas and discuss them with someone else a parent, your tutor, or your rabbi. Find other interpretations. You can obtain commentaries from your rabbi, your teacher, or your library. There is no need to reinvent the wheel; people have studied these texts for centuries. Avail yourself of their wisdom. It will give you food for thought and different approaches to the text. Consider these sources: Plaut s Commentary provides clear insights into Torah and haftarah. Field s A Torah Commentary for Our Times is a user-friendly reference that includes traditional as well as contemporary insights. Nehama Leibowitz s Studies provides authoritative modern perspectives. The Soncino Chumash and Rashi in particular are the classic rabbinic commentaries. The Five Books of Moses by Everett Fox is a word-for-word translation of the Hebrew text. The Encyclopaedia Judaica is a classic resource. The URJ Website: www.urj.org, where the skeleton of this Devar Torah guide also appears! **Using any of the ideas from the commentaries above is fair game, but remember to cite them!
Contract Between CMT and Parents of Bar/Bat Mitzvah Celebrant We, (parents names), have read the revised Bar and Bat Mitzvah Guide and agree to adhere by the outlined policies and rules. Signature of Parent Date Signature of Parent Date Return to CMT,, by.
The Blessing before the Torah Reading Person(s) with Aliyah: Congregation Responds: Person(s) with Aliyah Continues:
The Blessing after the Torah Reading The Shehecheyanu The Shehecheyanu blessing was introduced to encourage Jews to offer thanks for new and unusual experiences. It is typically recited at the beginning of holidays and to celebrate special occasions. Blessed are You, our God, Creator of time and space, who has supported us, protected us, and brought us to this moment.