Joy, Joy, Joy: obstacles Psalm 23 March 26, 2017 I. So, let s start this off again with that Joyful song. A. I ve got the Joy, Joy, Joy, Joy down in my heart. WHERE? Down in my heart. WHERE? Down in my heart. I ve got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart, WHERE? Down in my heart to stay. B. A few weeks ago, I got us started on this theme of Joy and couple of the main things I hope everyone went away with is that Joy and Happiness are not the same and that a pre-requisite to Joy is recognition of our Oneness our connectedness. 1. Happiness comes from gratifying one s self while joy will come from mutually enhancing relationships that connect us with the Eternal.
2. And as Joy comes from connecting with the Eternal it all comes from our recognition that in the Eternal we are all connected as one. That recognition itself brings us Joy. C. Once again a reminder that this immersion into Joy is being assisted by the Dalai Lama s and Archbishop Desmond Tutu s book, The Book of Joy. II. This morning we are going to look at a major obstacle to Joy. A. As many of you have probably already figured out, so much of our unhappiness originates within our own mind and heart in how we react to events in our lives. 1 1. I m sure this has happened to most of you. Some guy cuts you off in traffic. How do you respond? 2 1 Joy p. 54. 2
a) You can say a little prayer of blessing for him and then just let it go as you go on with your day. b) Or, you can let it get under your skin and get very angry and generalize their behavior upon all drivers and all humanity and set yourself up for a terrible, horrible, awful day. 2. To be honest, I have tried both responses and I promise you that the first approach will result in more joy in your life. 3. That being said, our innate flight or fight response makes the second response much easier and it s what comes most naturally to us. 3 3
4. Unfortunately, what usually happens after responding in such a way, perhaps after the initial anger has subsided, is that you start feeling guilty about your very un-jesus like reaction and you find yourself as part of that general humanity who you just held in such low regard; thus, not only blocking joy, but causing even more sadness. 5. This same dynamic could happen in your response to situations involving your children, other family members, and your friends and yes even other church members. 6. It can even take place in how you respond to illness or tragedy. 4 4
7. Poop is gonna happen, but how we perceive it and respond to it is entirely up to us and can either lead us towards or away from joy. B. Interestingly, the Dalai Lama and the Archbishop did not fully agree on how to deal with this; but I think they both raise important issues. 1. The Dalai Lama believes that with discipline and practice one can develop a mental immunity to suffering so that when it happens one has an automatic compassionate response that will override our reflexive flight or fight response. a) The Dalai Lama says that we human beings have the ability to make a distinction between the rational level and the emotional level. 5 5
At the rational level, we accept that this is a serious problem that we have to deal with, but at the deeper, emotional level, we are able to keep calm. Like the ocean has many waves on the surface but deep down it is quite calm. This is possible if we know how to develop mental immunity. 2 b) How we develop that mental immunity we will deal with at another time, but for now let s acknowledge that with a lot of disciple, practice and effort this is probably something that any of us can achieve. 6 2 Joy, p. 55. 6
2. Archbishop Tutu, probably has a little more help for those of us who don t have the disciple to achieve the mental immunity of the Dalai Lama. a) The Archbishop agreed that we should try to respond with such mental immunity, but for many of us that just doesn t happen. b) He s not making excuses for us or telling us that it s okay to get PO d, but he s trying to keep us from making it even worse when we do. 7 7
c) Recognizing that we are human and it s probably going to happen, his point is that we should not berate ourselves for our negative thoughts and emotions, that they are natural and unavoidable. They are only made more intense, by the glue of guilt and shame when we think we should not have them. 3 3. We can perhaps take a little wisdom from them both. a) It is better to not suffer the pangs of life that come with all the disruptions at the surface level and focus on the quite calm that exists at the deeper level of your spirit. 8 3 Joy, p. 55. 8
b) But, when we fail at this, which for most of us realistically is often the case, we should forgive ourselves and not berate ourselves which only doubles the suffering and serves as an additional obstacle to joy. 4. It s kind of like the Dalai Lama was saying that if we eat healthy, take our vitamins, and get enough rest, we can stay healthy, and the Archbishop was saying, Yes, even so, there will be times when we will catch a cold, and we should not make it worse by beating up on ourselves. 4 C. I find it interesting how Jesus commandment to love others as you love yourself is tied up in this. 9 4 Joy, p. 56. 9
1. If you fail to love others and then berate yourself for that, you will make it even harder for you to love others, because you can t even love yourself. 2. But if you break the vicious cycle by forgiving yourself and loving yourself, you will be much more prepared to love others. III. So, here s the 911 411, or really important point to get. Not recognizing and accepting the reality that bad things are going to happen to us; that is our primary obstacle to joy. A. Truly recognizing this is like an addict finally realizing that they do have a problem. B. Once we have come to accept this then we can deal with it. 10 10
C. We often do operate as if the suffering is an anomaly, something that s not supposed to happen to me. D. It s like we re in denial. My life is supposed to be painless and so why is the universe now conspiring against me? 1. You have no idea how many times a day I think in just such a way. 2. From hitting my knee on some cupboard door that the cosmos intentionally put in my way, to hitting too many stoplights, to catching a cold. 11 11
3. I still struggle with fully understanding that poopoo happens, it is what it is, and my task in life is to deal with it, become mentally immune and don t make it worse by focusing on it or worse yet, blaming God. IV. A final note, and Michael gave us a clue to this last week, when we have come to accept suffering, suffering can lead to Joy. A. Psalm 84:6 reads, Who passing through the vale of tears makes it a well. B. When we have accepted suffering we can use our tears, our stress and frustration, as a well from which we can draw the life-giving waters of our emotional and spiritual growth. 5 12 5 Joy. P. 60. 12
C. How many of the events in our lives that bring us suffering are also opportunities for emotional and spiritual growth. The suffering is going to happen, but the opportunities for redemption that is a gift from God. D. To find redemption in our suffering is what the resurrection is all about. So that even as our enemies surround us, our cup overflows with God s love; reassuring us that surely goodness and mercy shall follow us all the days of our lives and we shall be with God drinking our lemonade forever. AMEN. 13 13