Just One More Time. By Carolyn Notarangelo. The old car rumbled up the drive. It shuddered as the engine turned off. It was a

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Notarangelo 1 Carolyn Notarangelo Professor Ersinghaus Creative Writing April 2017 Just One More Time By Carolyn Notarangelo The government building had seen many a better day. 39 Grove Way. A rundown shack set back from the dirt road. A door once painted a dark red. Hung loosely from the frame. The No Trespassing sign kept away the even remote passerby. Truthfully had it ever seen a better day? The old car rumbled up the drive. It shuddered as the engine turned off. It was a government issue lime green AMC Gremlin. It was the ugliest car, and I hated it. I struggled in poverty with anything government issue. It was a piece of shit. I slammed the door and cursed it. A lone dog barked, indicating my presence. Be Quiet Clive I said to the Husky. Thus giving him the invitation to run to me. The door of the old rusted fence groaned in protest as it was opened. The yard was overgrown, and piles of poop were scattered throughout. Clive was sitting patiently. He held his paw up. It was custom to share a ham sandwich and potato chips. Sam was on the patio Becky, I can t keep doing this he said. I turned away from the husky. Hello Sam, I answered.

Notarangelo 2 Sometimes breaking the rules is all a person has. I said to Sam. oh and I need more money. Scar Man is dead Sam told me He was stabbed by an inmate. The news came as a shock. There was some freedom from that information. But I was told I could never return. My past was to be completely erased. This life never quite suited me. My neighbor Lydia once said You act like you don t even know your name I hid my anger, and after that avoided Lydia all together. Thinking back to the night my life changed. My eyes closed, and I saw their faces. My parents, and twin Daniel. Anna and Molly Green. The Green Family. Their house was on my way home from school. Anna was the oldest. What's your name she asked me one day. That's how I got my first job. They needed a babysitter for the summer. Daniel and I had finished our first year of high school. That was the last time he saw me. He said Later Sis and ran off It s been ten years since then. It was shortly after that I entered the witness protection program. Everyday, I relived the time leading up to that night. The explosion, scarman, and never being able to return home. The Green Family had just moved to town, and a needed a babysitter. I said to the agent Mr. Green had asked me to take the dog out before I went home. Slowly the tears slid down my cheeks. I never quite recovered from the loss. Then the house exploded into flames from the bomb that had been planted. I said to the agent. This is what I had to testify.

Notarangelo 3 I had seen the man with the scar on his face step out of the shadows. Our eyes had locked. He had a smile of pure evil. I dragged the bulldog Xavier, in the direction of my neighborhood. Ten minutes from the Green s House. The sweet scent of scar man s cigar permeated through the air. I never made it home that night. I had heard that the police went to my house the next day. It was an accident they said. An explosion at the Green s house. No survivors they said. Burnt beyond recognition. All the details had been handled by the agency. Three days later, I was laid to rest. I watched my funeral from a distance. Father Nick from the church was leading mourners in prayer. My friends and teachers from school had been there. Even the loathsome Katie was there. The coffin chosen was white was being lowered into the ground. I wondered what they was inside. My parents were trying to be strong, but had aged so much practically overnight. Daniel was angry. I could see it in his eyes. He knew he was being lied too. We shared a very strong bond. This witness relocation program really sucked. I always had to look over my shoulder, and the hair on the back of my neck was forever on edge. I had difficulty with the rules. Defiance was now a strong suit. I was so bad at it at this game of hiding. This would be the fifth time I would have to be relocated. The agency was exasperated with me. Has anyone ever been kicked out of the program? I said to the Witness Protection Relocation Specialist. He stared at me with a disinterested look in his eyes. These folks had no sense of humor. You never quite recover from something like this. Why I often wondered couldn t my family been relocated with me? Budget Cuts the specialist said. I came close to being spotted

Notarangelo 4 by Daniel, and my parents. Every time the agents showed me stories and pictures afterwards. Once a house fire. My parents were treated for smoke inhalation. Another time Daniel had been mugged, and his arm broken. The government didn t play around. They were worse than the people that I was being protected from. Clive s barking snapped me back to the present. Sam, it s over, I want to go home. I said. I was no longer in danger. The threat had died with Scar Man. I am not asking for your permission. I said to him. I want my life back. Sam looked intently at me. He had been working with me for about seven years. He had become like an older brother. I m not sure I can approve that. he said. I had wished for this day a long time. If I had known this is how my life would have turned out. I would have stabbed scarman myself. You can t stop me. I said to Sam. I have gotten good at ditching the agent s. Truth is, I could disappear for days on end. Becky, we re not the enemy, but give me a few days, please? Sam said. I nodded and turned to leave. The drive back to the hotel was long, and would get there by sundown. There was so much to think about on the drive back. Would a reunion with my family be possible? Would I be able to attend college, and get to be a pharmacist? How would my parents respond to me walking in the front door after being told I was dead? So much has changed in ten years. All I could do is wait. Sam would surely come up with something. Please God, let me go home I said. True to his word, Sam contacted me three days later. The decision has been made Sam said. Well, what is it? I asked

Notarangelo 5 Sam breathed in deeply, the problem is the safety of you, and your family he said. But, the threat is dead I said. True, but we don t know how connected scarman had been. Sam answered. This was not good. Come fucking on Sam, I have learned how to take care of myself, I have been on my own for ten years I said. My rant continued I may as well live in fear with the people I care about I told Sam. I already know what it is like to be dead. So what is the difference? I am living in hell. I slammed down the phone. Everything I had dreamed about in anticipation of going home wasn t going to happen. Bullshit I yelled. I threw the glass I was holding. It shattered into pieces as it hit the wall. I went home on a Tuesday. There was Daniel in the front yard of my parents house. It had been his job each year to power wash the house. He hated it, and I could hear him swearing. At first he didn t hear me. I spoke up louder It helps if you turn the water on It took about ten seconds for him to recognize my voice. He turned slowly, and muttered what the hell?