JUNE 2017 s e u l a V amily 226Parenting.com
INTRODUCTION PAGES 3-4 MORNING PRAYERS PAGES 5-6 DRIVE-TIME GAMES PAGES 7-8 DINNERTIME STORIES PAGES 9-10 BEDTIME QUESTIONS PAGE 11 WEEKLY BIBLE STORY & MEMORY VERSE PAGE 12
The Bible tells us that without vision, we run wild (Prov. 29:18). That s why we re kicking off TwentyTwoSix by establishing family values in our homes values that guide our discipline and family mission. In fact, the word discipline means to train. When our children misbehave, we can use these core values as anchor points to train our children. For example, we can point our children to passages about obeying mom and dad (Eph. 6:1-3; Prov. 30:17). Throughout this month, you can also discuss other biblical truths you want to highly value in your home (telling the truth, being kind, holding the tongue, etc.) and set rules based on those passages. When our children disobey, we then link their behavior to the passage and value our family esteems. We ll talk more about this in our live interaction. We included a list of 100 commonly held values to help you create your list of top five values for your family. You can also begin with the Bible. For instance, we started with Philippians 2:3 for one of our values because we really believe in treating others better than ourselves. Dr. Josh + Christi 3
FOR MOM So often, I (Christi) find myself worrying about how my kids will turn out. Did my harsh words this morning leave permanent scars? Am I spending enough time with them? Do they really know how valuable they are? Ever since Josh and I wrote out our top five values as a family, I ve found some of those fears have been dispelled. I now feel more intentional. Like I wasn t flying by the seat of my pants. As you navigate the values list this month, don t feel pressure to nail down your list of five values right away. Maybe you ll have 10 to start. As our children age, we ve added a few more. But the core five do remain. They are the values we use, in our marriage too, to make big decisions. Not only do they serve as a guide for the character we want in our children, they help us stay on the path to living out those values in front of our children. FOR DAD One of the most freeing moments for me (Josh) as a dad was when I wrote down our family values. I no longer felt directionless. It was empowering to know I was leading my family in a direction. That the decisions we needed to make as a family now had a filter. For instance, we value hard work. When our kids ask somebody else to do something they should (i.e. pick up their toys, clear their dinner plate, etc.), we simply talk about the ant. A verse our children have memorized is Proverbs 6:6, Go to the ant, you slacker! Observe its ways and become wise. As you write down values for your family this month, think about the values you live by. This month, use dinner or bedtime to communicate to your kids how your family values influence the daily decisions you re making at work or in your home. Make this a common conversation you have with your kids. FOR COUPLES We genuinely believe one of the greatest gifts we can give our kids is parents who love each other. Let s be honest, though, this is often easier said than done. However, when our values align as husband and wife, we can more easily make decisions that support the health and intimacy of our marriage. Begin by individually putting together your list of top 10 values, in order. Don t show your spouse. Then, come together and compare your lists. Talk about your list and the whys behind your values. Finally, mutually develop your top five values as family. 4
MORNING PRAYERS We suggest you pray the following prayers for your kids throughout this month as they wake, and even ask them to pray the prayer for themselves as well. Simply change the respective pronouns from my children for the parent, to me for the child 01 Father, help my children to place You as the highest value in their life. Lead them to know You deeply, love You fiercely, and serve You faithfully. 02 03 God, we are called to love others as ourselves. Help my kids to value themselves. Protect them from finding their worth in the world or what others think of them. Father, help my children to learn their value and worth comes from how much You love them and what You did to save them. 04 05 Lord, may my children value others and treat them as better than themselves. Heavenly Father, surround my children with friends, mentors, and loved ones who champion and affirm our family values. 06 07 Lord, whether it s a word of affirmation, helping with a task, standing up for someone, or giving a gift, help my child to show someone they re valuable today. God, today I humbly ask for Your help in living out our family values. I confess that I don t always live according to Your ways, and simply ask today for Your forgiveness. 5
MORNING PRAYERS 08 09 Lord, I pray my children s values will always be built on having You only as their one true God. Father, protect my children from the temptations of the enemy. Use our family values to strengthen their resolve as they seek to walk in Your ways. 10 Lord, Your eyes are looking throughout the earth for a heart that is completely Yours. I pray today these hearts are my children s. Woo them to be undeniably in love with You as their greatest value. 11 God, I pray for a belly laugh today for my children. Teach them the value of having fun and laughing hard. And Lord, do the same for me. 12 Father, soften my kids hearts so they value forgiveness. May they be sensitive to sin, quick to confess, and steadfast in repentance. 13 God, like the Good Samaritan, give my children an eye for those who hurt. Guide them to discover at an early age their own spiritual gifts they can use to serve and help others feel valuable. 14 15 Lord, I pray for a steadfast spirit within my children to obey Your commands and live by our family values. May the way they live their lives point others to You. Father, help my children to be honest, hardworking, rested, patient, faithful, empathetic, and kind. (Insert your values into these prayers. You can pray a different value each day for your kids.) 6
DRIVE-TIME GAMES Each month we provide a list of games related to that month s mile-marker. Simply choose the ones you enjoy as a family and play them often. If I I Would Since this month is based on values we hold as a family, this is a game that can help get the creative juices flowing for how to implement those values. During your drive ask questions like: If I were President of the United States, I would If I were the mayor of our city, I would If someone gave me $100,000 to use at our church for people in need, I would If I were allowed to implement one law, I would Have fun with these answers too! See who can be the most creative. Invite your kids to come up with questions as well. For instance, they might say, If I were my teacher, I would Also, use it as an opportunity to figure out practical ways your family could make a difference now with the resources and positions God has given you. Today s Heroes Take turns on the drive home today telling stories about someone you saw live out a biblical value. For bonus points: State the value you saw lived out (justice, generosity, self-respect, vulnerability, etc.). Then either recite a Scripture verse or tell a Bible story that ties to the value you saw lived out. 7
DRIVE-TIME GAMES The Value of a Song Use the radio or a music app to play just the first few beats of a song then hit pause or turn it down. See who can guess the name and artist of the song. Experiment with different genres. Top 40. Country. Christian. The first part of the game is to find out how many of the songs your kids already know. The second part of the game is to ask the question, You know the name of the song, now what s it about? What primary value is it trying to get across? Many kids get caught up in tunes without thinking about or understanding the lyrics. Use this game to talk about the value of a song. If you have older kids, have them look up the lyrics and read them aloud. Use this game as a way to also teach about what we listen to and the influence it has on what we believe and how we live. The Integrity of the Road OK parents, this one will require integrity on your part. Nothing like accountability, right? While driving, have your kids look for driving behaviors that score value points. Everyone s on the same team, so the goal will be to play against your own scores each trip you take. Start with a score of 0. When your kids see someone use a turn signal, that s one point. If they see someone pulling out while stopped and another person allows the car to go in front of them, that s a point. However, if they see someone texting and driving, they lose a point. If they hear someone honk out of anger, that s a lost point. If someone rides too closely, that s a lost point. Cheer as a family when you see awesome driving behaviors. Be creative. Feel free to make up your own scoring too. Use it as a discussion about the importance of driving behaviors and how our values impact every part of our lives, even behind the wheel of a car. Pray The point of this game is simple: to teach the value of prayer. Use drive time to each talk about one person you know who needs prayer today. Spend your drive praying for others. 8
DINNERTIME STORIES Use the dinner table this month to talk about your family values. As you put together your family s list of top values, invite your children into the discussion. Talk about each value individually and what they mean to each of you. For instance, you can ask the following questions as prompts: 01 What does (the value, like honesty or empathy) mean to you? Is there another value that seems to fit more of who we aspire to be as a family? What Bible verses mean the most to us as a family? How can we make those verses a family mission? As you establish your core biblical values for your family this month, be sure to use the dinner table as a way to regularly talk about how you re living them out each day with your kids. Give them time to share as well. 02 03 Tell each of your children one value you see in them that you admire. Tell your kids a value you hold dear from a lesson you learned growing up, good or bad. 04 05 Tell them about a moment you felt most proud of them. What specifically did they do? Tell your kids about your parents. What 2-3 values did your parents instill in you growing up? 06 07 Talk to your children about your favorite teacher in school. Describe what made him/her your favorite and the values he/she instilled in you. 9
DINNERTIME STORIES Tell your kids how you specifically lived out one of your family values today. Did you make a decision based on one of the values? What decision did you make? What were the alternative decisions that you could have made? What Scripture supports the decision you made? 08 09 Tell a story about something your parents did that makes you laugh so hard even today. What is one thing you learned today that you didn t know when you woke up? Everyone share at the table tonight. 10 11 Tell your children the story about how you came to know the Lord. Talk to your children about the values your grandparents instilled in you. Tell stories about them. What are your greatest memories of your grandparents that specifically tie to lessons they taught you? 12 13 Tell your kids about the rule or commandment you had the hardest time following growing up. Which one is hard for you today? Tell your children about someone you admire who, on the outside didn t look trustworthy or who was talked about in negative ways by so many others, yet you believed in and saw their heart, like God sees ours. 14 15 Tell your children a modern day Good Samaritan story, where either you were the Good Samaritan or were on the receiving end of a Good Samaritan. 10
BEDTIME QUESTIONS 01 What does it mean to value something or someone? 02 Name two people you most value in life. What is it about them that you value? 03 Who is someone you never met but look up to? What value do they possess that you admire? 04 What one thing (i.e. a toy, school, an ipad, a book, etc.) can you think of in your life that you most value right now? What is it about that thing that you value? 05 What values do you think God wants to see in us? 06 If you could make one family rule, what would it be? 07 Who is someone (a friend at school, a teacher, sibling, etc.) you saw act with integrity this week? What did they do? 08 Tell me about the action of another that put you in a good mood this week. How can you pay it forward? 09 Is there someone in your life that makes you not feel valuable? Who? What do they do or say to make you not feel valuable? 10 What is one thing you would like us to do more of as a family? (If possible, try to do it this weekend). 11 What one quality / value do you most love about our family? 12 What one quality / value do you most love about your teacher? 13 What is your favorite story? What does that story teach you? 14 What s the silliest thing you saw or heard this week? 15 When did you feel most proud of yourself today / this week? 11
WEEKLY BIBLE STORY & MEMORY VERSE WEEK 1 Exodus 20:1-17 The 10 Commandments WEEK 2 Luke 10:25-37 The Good Samaritan WEEK 3 1 Samuel 16:1-13 David Chosen by God WEEK 4 Luke 4:1-13 Jesus Is Tempted Memory verse: Exodus 20:3 Do not have other gods besides me. Memory verse: Luke 10:27 Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself. Memory verse: 1 Samuel 16:7 But the Lord said to Samuel Humans do not see what the Lord sees, for humans see what is visible, but the Lord sees the heart. Memory verse: Luke 4:8 And Jesus answered him, It is written: Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only. If you re unsure of what Bible to use for the monthly stories, please see the recommended resources. There are children s story Bibles and teen Bibles we recommend, depending on the age and reading level of your children. We ll also spend time in our monthly videos talking about ways you can read these stories to and with your kids. Babies Preschoolers Bible Storybook Preschoolers The Jesus Storybook Bible Preschoolers It s All About Jesus Bible Storybook Preschoolers Elementary The Big Picture Interactive Bible, CSB Pre-Teens - Teens Essential Teen Study Bible, CSB Parents CSB Study Bible
Acceptance Accomplishment Accountability Achievement Adaptability Adventure Affluence Altruism Ambition Assertiveness Beauty Bravery Commitment Compassion Confidence Contentment Conviction Courage Creativity Curiosity Dependability Depth Dignity Discipline Duty Empathy Emotionally Safe Encouragement Excellence Fairness Faith Family Fearlessness Financial independence Flexibility Focus Freedom Friendliness Generosity Grace Gratitude Health Holiness Honesty Honor Hopefulness Hospitality Humility Humor Imagination Independence Influence Insightfulness Integrity Intelligence Intimacy Joy Justice Kindness Knowledge Leadership Love Loyalty Marriage Maturity Meaning Mindfulness Obedience Optimism Organization Patience Passion Peace Perseverance Philanthropy Pragmatism Preparedness Presence Proactivity Professionalism Resilience Resolve Respect Responsibility Righteousness Sacrifice Security Self-control Self-respect Sincerity Spontaneity Stability Success Sympathy Trustworthiness Understanding Vision Vulnerability Wisdom Wonder LIST OF 100 COMMONLY HELD VALUES FOR YOUR FAMILY