Soup Patrol. Soup Patrol is a program from Mathew 25 Ministries run by a Franciscan Friar named

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Christian 1 Lloyd Christian Writing 101 10/29/2013 Soup Patrol Most Holy Trinity Parish Soup Patrol is a program from Mathew 25 Ministries run by a Franciscan Friar named Brother David Buer. They operate out of Most Holy Trinity Catholic Parish in Tucson, Arizona. Basically, they feed people soup and hot chocolate from the back of a van. They also bring blankets and baked goods to give to the needy. The program runs 7 days a week from October to

Christian 2 April of every year. Soup Patrol is made up entirely of volunteers in the community, however, this project would not be possible without Brother David Brother David has taken a vow of poverty. Any money he receives goes back to the community. Soup Patrol is just one of the many programs that Brother David manages. He also dedicates his time to running homeless shelters. There is a program to cool off and get hydrated during the summer Brother David Buer months, and a shelter to house people at night during the cold winter months. Just looking at Brother David sparks intrigue. He has long hair and a big beard and wears a Franciscan robe. He doesn t simply manage these programs. He is right there doing the work with the rest of the volunteers. All with a good attitude and a humble spirit. From October to April he sleeps on the floor of a homeless shelter that he oversees. He coordinates social programs with churches of all different faiths to help the community. It s not unusual to see Buddhists and Muslims working together with Brother David for the good of the community. A typical night on Soup Patrol starts out in the kitchen at Most Holy Trinity Parish. Around 6pm 4 volunteers gather to go out and feed the hungry. A priest from the church has already prepared all of the food for the night. Brother David is there to make sure all the

Christian 3 volunteers have arrived. The food temperatures are checked and logged for sanitary conditions. The van is loaded with soup, hot chocolate, baked goods, and blankets. Plastic spoons, cups, and napkins are also loaded for serving. The van will make several scheduled stops around the community. The volunteers all take on a specific job for the night. One volunteer serves the hot chocolate. Another volunteer ladles the soup. While another hands out napkins and spoons. Lastly, the fourth volunteer hands out blankets and baked goods. The work is very fast paced. There can be as many as eighty people at one stop. It can be challenging to serve that many people in a quick manner. You need to have a thick skin to do this job. The people in line for food aren t always patient, nor sober. It s not uncommon to break up a fight in the line. There is a mix of people waiting in the line. There are homeless people that are roughing it on the streets. There are the runaway youths with no home. And there are the people who have shelter, but still need food. It takes about 15 minutes to serve 80 people. It is a very surreal feeling to see that many faces for only a moment at a time. Soup Patrol also makes more intimate stops. There are a few homeless people that Soup Patrol meets at their shelter on the streets. Sometimes, a person is so cut off from society that they would rather go hungry than stand in a line of people. It is beyond the capability of words to express the emotion in these encounters. Every time you see someone in this condition, you hope that the small effort of feeding them will bring them back from the hell that they are in. Most people see emptiness in a homeless person s eyes. When you see that faint spark of human connection in someone so lost, it is a reminder that there will always be hope. The volunteers do this while the threat of arrest looms over them. Mathew 25 ministries does not have a permit from the Pima County Health Department. A mobile food permit is required to serve food from the van. Father Bill Remmel oversees the kitchen operations at Most

Christian 4 Holy Trinity parish. He has been working with the county to get the necessary permits. Father Remmel has said the county has been "very nice to work with. Just because they are officials doesn't mean they are bad people. My feeling is we wouldn't want to do anything to put anyone's health in jeopardy"(herreras). However, complaints have been filed against the Church because there are people that see Soup Patrol as enabling the homeless. Despite this, Soup Patrol will not stop anytime soon. The only way to feel at the end of a night of Soup Patrol is emotionally exhausted. It takes about an hour to clean all the serving containers. You are left with contradictory feelings; the uplifting feeling of doing a good deed, and an inescapable sense of sadness for all the suffering people out there. Soup Patrol gets its inspiration from the verse Matthew 25:35 For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat (Bible). It is as simple as that. Soup Patrol provides a basic need. But in serving food, you can also serve a little hope. Works Cited Bible. The Holy Bible: Revised Standard Version. San Francisco: Oxford UP, 2006. Print. Herreras, Mair. "Tucson Weekly." Tucson Weekly. Tucson Weekly, 1 Feb. 2011. Web. 30 Oct. 2013. <http://www.tucsonweekly.com/>. Soup Patrol. N.d. Photograph. Tucson. Most Holy Trinity Parish. Most Holy Trinity Parish. Web. 27 Oct. 2013. <http://www.mhtparish.org>.

Christian 5 St Anthony Fraternity, SFO. Brother David Bruer. 2007. Photograph. Tucson. St Anthony Fraternity, SFO. St Anthony Fraternity, SFO, 2007. Web. 27 Oct. 2013. <http://www.freewebs.com/revsfo/apps/photos/>. Welcome to the Brainfuse Writing Lab! Our overview comments and recommendations about specific parts of your paper are included in the tutor response form. A copy of your paper is also posted below this form, and it includes additional comments in brackets. Please feel free to resubmit your paper for further review after using our comments and suggestions to make the recommended changes. If you have additional questions, you can direct them to info@brainfuse.com. Thank you for choosing the Brainfuse Writing Lab, and best wishes with your revisions! TUTOR RESPONSE FORM Part 1 Overview Thank you for submitting your paper to the Brainfuse Writing Lab. I have made in-text comments regarding the following parts of your paper: the introduction, conclusion and the first body paragraph. They will help you notice recurring errors and issues within your writing. Based on these comments and recommendations, please review the rest of your paper. Once you have made changes, please feel free to re-submit your paper for further review anytime. Be sure to include proper in-text citations in the paper. With every piece of factual information, and especially any statistical evidence or direct quotations, a citation is required. Focus on developing your sentences more fully by combining short sentences together and removing unnecessary words and phrases. Also, develop an introduction with a clear thesis statement. Part 2 Main Idea and Thesis Include a clear and strong thesis statement in the introductory paragraph. Remember, a good thesis statement declares what your paper is going to be about in a specific and focused way.

Christian 6 Revise this sentence from the end of your introduction to help it become a clear thesis statement: Revise: "Soup Patrol is made up entirely of volunteers in the community. However, none of this would be possible without someone like Brother David." Correct: "Soup Patrol is made up entirely of volunteers in the community, however, this project would not be possible without Brother David." Part 3 Introduction and Conclusion The conclusion could be stronger. Use your conclusion to restate the main idea you are trying to communicate, review what you have covered in your body, and find a way to help readers see why this subject is important. Avoid adding any new information in your conclusion. It should be used to summarize and synthesize what has been said in the rest of the essay. Part 4 Development Avoid writing in a series of short, simple sentences by combining them into betterwritten compound and complex sentences that help your ideas flow well. This is one of the main problems with your essay. See the below example from your paper: o Revise: He is right there doing the work with the rest of the volunteers. All with a good attitude and a humble spirit. o Correct: He is right there doing the work with the rest of the volunteers, all with a good attitude and a humble spirit. Part 5 Organization Indent every paragraph. This will create a strong visual structure for your reader s eyes to follow. Part 6 Style There are places in your essay where you use filler words. If a word or phrase doesn t contribute to the meaning of a sentence, consider removing it (check comments in paper.) Part 7 Grammar, Usage, and Mechanics Try to better develop your short sentences into longer ones. See the below example from your paper: Revise: Brother David has taken a vow of poverty. Any money he receives goes back to the community. Correct: Brother David has taken a vow of poverty, which means that any money he receives goes back to the community.

Christian 7 Some examples of these errors are pointed out in the in-text comments on your paper, but you should use these guidelines to check all parts of your work. Note that there may be other issues with grammar, usage, and mechanics in this paper as well. To catch other types of errors, please refer to The Brainfuse Essential Grammar Guide. You can view the guide by clicking on this link and logging in to Brainfuse: http://www.brainfuse.com/curriculumupload//1381694219673.html If you would like specific feedback on your grammar, usage, and mechanics, please resubmit your paper and request a Grammar Review. Part 8 Formatting MLA Ask your instructor for more information on the formatting that is required for this paper. If you need to follow MLA formatting, please review the general guidelines below. o Font: Times New Roman, 12 pt. o Spacing: Double-space the text o Margins: 1 inch on all sides. o Indent: The first line of a paragraph should be indented by a half inch. o Heading: Type your full name, your instructor s name, the name of the course, and the date in the upper left-hand corner of the first page. o In-Text Citations: Include the author of each source followed by the page number. (Smith 100) Smith reflected on the decision:. (100). Seem simple enough? Here are some possible complications: (Note that the titles below are examples and not based on actual publications.) You are citing A website: (Smith et al., A Writer at Work ) (Moore, Just Add Words ) Two different sources by one author: (Smith, Writing Lyrics 100) (Smith, The New Musical 22) Note that the first example is a book, and the second example is an article. Two authors with the same name: (R. Smith, Writing Lyrics 100); (B. Smith, Cole Porter s Creativity 8) A source with more than one author: (Cruz, Kim, Moore Staging a Musical 10) A source without an author: (Memoirs of a Stage Manager 303) A website: (Smith et al., A Writer at Work ) (Moore, Just Add Words )

Christian 8 Works Cited: The word Works Cited (no quotations) is centered at the top of a new page and is not bolded, italicized, or underlined. Entries that are more than one line should have a hanging indent. (Every line except for the first line is indented by 0.5 inches.)