Issue 121 November 2013 So goes the old nursery rhyme, at any rate, though I suspect that these days most of us don't give much of a thought to who Guy Fawkes was or why he planned to blow up the Houses of Parliament. We're more interested in building the biggest bonfire, finding the best firework display or getting through as much parkin and as many toffee apples as possible before the night is out. And then just a few days later on November 11 we find ourselves celebrating Remembrance Day, the date chosen to commemorate the armistice that put an end to the First World War. These collective acts of remembering mark events that have shaped our history, and thus our present. As we remember the past, we bring to mind the lessons it holds for us and - hopefully at least! - learn something to improve our lives today. But it's all too easy just to forget. Out of sight, out of mind - and suddenly key moments become little more than irrelevant and long-forgotten words on the pages of a dusty old history book. And you know what? The same happens with God. Unless we deliberately include him in our lives, the very idea of God fades into the distance. Yes, many of us think, he must be there somewhere, but our minds are on so much other stuff there simply isn't time or space to be bothered with him. That's precisely what an ancient book of wisdom was getting at when it tells us to Remember your Creator when you are young, before the days of trouble come and the years catch up with you. So between sparklers and poppies, Catherine wheels and twenty-one gun salutes, take a moment to remember your creator. Life is so much more worth living when you're back in touch with him. And if you need a reminder of just who God is and what he did for you, do drop in at any of our services or other activities; we'd love to help jog your memory! 2 Remember, remember the fifth of November Gunpowder, treason and plot I know of no reason why gunpowder treason Neil Rees
3 ent. Wife called up her mum Husband and wife had an argum and said, coming to live with you." "He fought with me again. I am Mum said, mistake. I am coming "No darling, he must pay for his to live with you." During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether or not an older person should be put in a Care Home?" "Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub." "Oh, I understand," I said. "A normal person would use the bucket because it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup." "No" he said. "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed near the window?"
4 5 HANDYMAN SERVICES Why pay the higher prices for the smaller jobs? No job too small Bobby Handyman 07402535381 bobby-ams@blueyonder.co.uk Parbold Equestrian Centre Horse Riding Lessons for all ages and standards Family Specials from 12 Specialised tuition by British Horse Society Qualified Instructors For details of safe and friendly instruction come and see us at: Bradshaw Lane, Parbold or contact us on 01257 464547 www.parboldequestriancentre.co.uk RAY LAWRENCE PAINTER & DECORATOR 19 Scott Drive Ormskirk Lancashire t: 01695 578 490 m: 07901843254 email: rayang.wwjd@uwclub.net We provide superior crafting opportunities through workshops, masterclasses & tutoring. We design imaginative themed birthday parties for children. We take time to listen to your ideas and offer you a unique and creative occasion. Monthly workshops 12 per person, Masterclasses from 25 per person. Birthday parties from 8.50 per child. Call to enquire or book: Suzy 07872388662 / Gail 07943124887
6 7 Beyond the Compost Bin I was admiring the gardens during a short visit to Jersey, recently. The warm weather had encouraged the begonias and busy lizzies to stay in bloom, and the silver plumes of pampas grass swayed from green hillsides. One garden centre we visited had a twelve foot fern for sale. Resting on an enormous black pot, it boasted a 1,500 price tag. They did have two, a friendly assistant told me, but had just sold one of them. I informed him that, sadly, we would never get the remaining specimen on the plane! Travelling along the beautiful lanes of the island was a joy perpendicular cliffs on one side, and deep valleys on the other. Enormous trees, still very much in leaf, formed canopies overhead, the sunshine filtering through their branches. Sorry, I sound like a travel brochure! I did see something for the first time. I knew birds did it, but I had never seen it happening before. On a patch of manicured lawn a rather large seagull, having tired of searching for tourists with ice cream in their hands, was pounding ferociously on the ground with both feet, as if the surface was red-hot. Stamping up and down, unembarrassed by amused onlookers, he danced again and again. Eventually success was achieved by the appearance of a worm which had come to the surface in the mistaken belief that rain was battering the earth above. The following day he was there again with a few friends including a rather over-excited youngster, who he was keen to educate with his well-practised routine. Some seagulls have been known to choose pavements to tap-dance on. This has less effective results producing only sore feet! Soon it was time to return before the storm of October 28 th arrived, now known as St. Jude s Storm, when no sensible seagull would attempt dancing on the grass. It has been given this name because it is the feast day of St. Jude, the patron saint of lost causes. He is also the patron of a football team in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Perhaps some teams in England should embrace him too, although I would never dare to suggest any local candidates! It is perhaps fortunate that the storm did not arrive the following day, October 29 th, as it might have been called the St Narcissus storm, after an early Christian who is the patron saint of insect bites. This Jude may have been the one who was brother of James and related to Jesus, and his short book, tucked away in the New Testament just before the last book of the Bible, typifies not a lost cause but a living victory. It is full of optimism, enthusiasm and encouragement during dreadfully difficult times for the first Christians. If you feel that you trip up rather than tap-dance, spare an ear to Jude when he says - (Jesus) is able to keep you from stumbling, and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy. By the way, you can see dancing seagulls on www.youtube.com/watch? v=_ta3-a-xemw Ted Whitfield
8 9 Sunday What s on @ CLM 10.45am Family Service 7.00pm Evening Fellowship (2nd Sun monthly) 7.00pm Praise & Worship with Music Group (4th Sun monthly) Monday 5.30pm Children s Club (ages 4-11) 7.45pm The Core fortnightly (15 yrs +) Wednesday 12.30pm Luncheon Club 2.15pm Band of Cheer Ladies Meeting Friday Saturday 10.00am Parent & Toddler Group 7.30pm Ladies Craft Evening (1st Friday monthly) 9.00am Missions Prayer Meeting (1st Sat. monthly) Men s Meetings as announced. Home Groups meet at different times and in different homes throughout the week. For more information on any of the above, please ring Beryl on 01772 813334 or visit the website - clmchurchormskirk.org.uk Children s Birthday Parties The Mission is available for hire for birthday parties of pre-school or Primary aged children. Please contact Beryl for further details. 01772 813334 or 0776 746 1087 or iandbmackenzie@gmail.com Need Prayer? Contact us and we will be willing to pray for you or with you. Doreen Williams 01704 897422 or Alan Mapstone 01695 421628 Principal Church Leader: Neil Rees 0744 934 0677 Administrator: Beryl Mackenzie 01772 813334 or 0776 746 1087 Christ Church Clergy Vicar: Rev Ross Moughtin 01695 422175 Curate: Rev Phil Weston 01695 571087
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