The Disciple-Making Parent Raising Your Children to Love and Follow Jesus Christ theapollosproject.com
What does the culture tell us about good parenting? Finish this sentence: A good parent will do for his/her child.
Has not the LORD made [a husband and wife] one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because He was seeking godly offspring. Malachi 2:15
50% of kids who grow up in a Christian home don t follow the Lord as adults. Source: Sticky Faith, p. 16, 2011
Train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6 A Proverb Not a Promise!
Why They Leave 1. Hypocrisy and hurt by spiritual leaders including parents. 2. Their faith is not working. 3. They never personally owned their faith. Source: Why Christian Kids Leave the Faith, Tom Bisset, You Lost Me, David Kinsman
Why They Leave 4. Other things became more important 5. They were given shallow answers to life s difficult questions.
Why They Stay 1. Quality relationship with parent or mentor. 2. Gospel preaching and true conversion. 3. Biblical worldview including answers for their questions. 4. Friends who encourage their faith.
An Overview 1. Introduction 2. God s Person and God s Process 3. Secrets of Disciple-Making Parents Part 1 4. Secrets of Disciple-Making Parents Part 2 5. Secrets for Discipling Your Teens
Discussion 1. What cultural messages press on parents in this community to be a good parent? What pressures do you feel or have influenced you? 2. Had you thought of your child as an eternal soul? How does thinking this way impact how you look at them?
God s Person and God s Process theapollosproject.com
Has not the LORD made [a husband and wife] one? In flesh and spirit they are his. And why one? Because He was seeking godly offspring. Malachi 2:15
In the Beginning Then God said, Let us make man in our image, in our likeness and let them rule over the fish the birds the livestock God blessed them and said to them, Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Genesis 1:26, 28
To Abraham For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the Lord by doing what is right and just Genesis 18:19
To Israel These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Deuteronomy 6:6-7
To Israel He decreed statues for Jacob and established the law in Israel which he commanded our forefathers to teach their children, so the next generation would know him, even the children yet to be born and they in turn would tell their children. Psalm 78:5-6
Peter s First Sermon Repent and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of sin. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. This promise is for you and your children and all who are far off - for all whom the Lord our God will call. Acts 2:38-39
Paul to the NT Church Fathers, do not exasperate your children but bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:4
The Great Commission Then Jesus said, All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. Matthew 28:18-20
You are God s most effective shepherd!
Most teenagers and their parents may not realize it, but a lot of research in the sociology of religion suggests that the most important social influence in shaping young people s religious lives is the religious life modeled and taught to them by their parents. Dr. Christian Smith Soul Searching: The Religious and Spiritual Lives of American Teenagers
Parents are huge, absolutely huge, nearly a necessary condition for a child to remain strong in the their faith into young adulthood. Without questions, the most important pastor a child will ever have in their life is a parent. Dr. Christian Smith Soul Searching: The Religious and Spiritual Lives of American Teenagers
First, let us begin by emphatically declaring it is parents, fathers in particular, and not the church who are given the primary responsibility for calling the next generation to hope in God. The church serves a supplementary role, reinforcing the biblical nurture occurring in the home. Charles Spurgeon
Myths You Might Be Believing If I just take them to church, they will be fine. My parent did not know what they were doing and I turned out ok. I have to create the perfect environment for them to follow the Lord. I don t have any real influnence in my teens life.
What is God s Process?
I have been reminded of your sincere faith, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and in your mother Eunice and, I am persuaded, now lives in you also. 2 Timothy 1:5
As for you, continue in what you have learned and become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures which are able to make you wise unto salvation in Christ Jesus. 2 Timothy 3:14-15
As for you, continue in what you have learned and become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures which are able to make you wise unto salvation in Christ Jesus. 2 Timothy 3:14-15
As for you, continue in what you have learned and become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it and how from infancy you have known the holy Scriptures which are able to make you wise unto salvation in Christ Jesus. 2 Timothy 3:14-15
Quick Discussion 1. Who grew up in a gospel preaching church and came to Christ as a child? Did you have a later time when you would say your faith became your own?
Secrets of Parent Disciple-Makers theapollosproject.com
1. Make The Great Commission the North Star of your parenting.
I have no greater joy that to hear that my children are walking in the truth. 3 John 4
Application Questions 1. Ask yourself, do I need to recalibrate my parenting goals? Do I need to repent of aiming at the wrong thing? 2. Ask yourself, have I been involved in other things at the expense of their development as a disciple of Jesus Christ? How does fear motivate our activities? 3. Look over your schedule & make a Don t do list.
2. Live out the gospel at home. Do my children see a living faith or hypocrisy? Is there hidden sin at home? Am I excited about Jesus and his kingdom?
Application Questions 1. Is there any sin at home undermining my example before my children? What will I do about it? 2. If we had a recording of your words at home, what would they reveal? 3. Ask your spouse or children, If you could change one thing about our home what would you change?
3. Fill Your Home with the Aroma of the Gospel Is there an atmosphere of grace? Is there an atmosphere of affection? Am I living differently than the world?
3. Fill Your Home with the Aroma of the Gospel Am I speaking the gospel at home? Am I exposing them to the gospel at church? Am I praying for and trusting God for a profession of faith?
Application Questions 1. Is our home a place of grace and affection? 2. Can I explain the gospel to my children in simple terms? Are we in church so that they are hearing the gospel from others? 3. Do I wait in relaxed confidence that my children will repent and follow Christ?
4. Make sure you have their heart.
4. Make sure you have their heart. 1. Intentional Affection 2. Intentional Questions and Listening 3. Intentional Time to Communicate.
The Donut Date Journal 70 Questions to ask. A place to record their answers over their lifetime. Check out donutdatejournal.com for more info.
Application Questions 1. Am I emotionally connected to my children. 2. Is there time in our schedule to connect at the heart level? 3. If you asked your spouse or friend, How could I grow as a communicator, what would they say?
5. Nourish your children in the Word.
1. Read The Jesus Story Bible 2. Followup on the Sunday School lesson. 3. Have simple family devotions. 4. Have them read the word themselves. 5. Memorize verses as a family. 5. Nourish your children in the Word.
Application Questions 1. Is the Bible a centerpiece of our family life? How? 2. Do they see me reading it? Memorizing it?
6. Give them gospel discipline.
Application Questions 1. Am I comfortable being the authority in their lives? 2. Do I see the connection between training them to obey me and obey God? 3. Do I tend to be too lenient or too harsh?
7. Commit yourself to a healthy local church with healthy pastors.
Application Questions 1. How committed am I to the local church? 2. Do I cast a vision to my children of commitment to the bride of Christ? Or do they hear criticism?
Questions?
Discipling Your Teen Raising Your Children to Love and Follow Jesus Christ theapollosproject.com
Connect them with mentors.
Application Questions 1. Who else am I building into their lives?
Walk them through doubts.
Application Questions 1. Have I proactively offered to talk with them about doubts? 2. Am I aware of apologetics material to help them defend their faith?
Encourage friendships around the gospel.
Application Questions 1. Have I proactively talked about friend choices?
Teach them about kingdom life and purpose.
Application Questions 1. Do I see my children as people who can serve God now? And not just be served? 2. Am I asking them to serve sacrificially now? 3. How are we serving together as a family?
Monitor the media.
Application Questions 1. Do I have the right attitude toward their technology and my technology? Am I on MY phone too much? 2. What steps have you taken to protect from the sewage? 3. Do I have other families in the church who share our vision?
Encourage them to pursue Christ.
Application Questions 1. Do I encourage them to pursue Christ or am I happy with outward conformity?
Questions?
Pray like none of this will work.
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Educate yourself about how to pass the gospel to your children.