Session 2 Based on materials from: Althoughh many Christians and their churches believe they have held on to God's Word as their standard for life, their responses to conflict, among other things, show that they have in fact surrendered much ground to the world. Instead of resolving differences in a distinctively biblical fashion, they often react to conflict with the same avoidance, manipulation, and control that characterize the world. In effect, both individually and congregationa ally, they have given in to the world's postmodern standard, which is 1 what feels good, sounds true, and seems beneficial to me? Whenever Christians fight at home, in church, in any arena everyone watches and thinks, 'They're no different from the rest of us.' 2 The Gospel is the definitive good news of the truest love, thee mission of which is glory to God and peace to sinnerss through the reconciliation purchased on the cross of Jesus Christ. The Gospel is about relationships. The Gospel is about reconciliation. The Gospel is about love. God has an answer to our inability to make peace. His answer is the gospel 3 No matter what race or country we come from, none of us is naturally inclined to obey Jesus commands to love our enemies, confess our wrongs, gently correct others, submit to our church, and forgive those who hurt us. In fact, left to our own instincts, we are disposed to do just the opposite. Fortunately, God has provided a way for us to overcome our innate weakness as peacemakers and learn to respond to conflict constructively y. His solution is the gospel, the good news that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners (1 Tim 1:15). God sent his Son to pay the price for our sins through this death and resurrection. When we believe this as put our trust in Jesus, God forgives alll our sins. Through the gospel he also enables us to learn how to resist temptation, obey his commands, and live a life that honors him. 4 Trinity Bible Church 408.782.1619 www.trinitybible echurch.org Page 1 of 8
The Gospel is more than something to believe. Salvation is more than justification. Faith is more than intellectual ascent. This gospel gives us the gift of eternal life. But the gospel is more than a ticket to heaven. It isn't just for unbelievers. It's for every believer every day of life. (27). We don't pull out the gospel until we're in the hospital, facing only a few days to live. (27). God intends for the gospel to completely transform every area of our daily life. (28). Christians are enabled to manifest the transformative power of the Gospel only when faith becomes more a matter of valuing than accepting. Just knowing the right thing to do never brings peace. 5 The acquiring of more information is not the solution it is essential, but it is not the solution. Right knowledge is indispensable, but it is not the solution. Heart change means more than a change in knowledge. It is a change of affections, values, cravings, appetites, and satisfaction. We all know far more than we want to be accountable for. We know more than we live. Two opposite dangers pose an ongoing threat. First, there is the danger of assuming that knowledge itself is the solution. Some come eager to learn some new formula as though that is all that is needed for all to be right. It is not learning something new as much as it is living out what you already know in the gospel of your salvation. Second, there is the danger of neglecting the Bible. Some are reluctant to go to Scripture because they see through the lens of experience and think that learning is not the solution and instead resign to a complacent state of frustration: been there, done that and it simply doesn t work. Both of these mindsets are wrong. The first sets up for the second. Both will result in discouragement, eventually loss of hope, and ultimately a lack of faith in the God of the Word. The problem is not that the Word has failed you; it is that you have approached it as a dead letter and not as living and active. Responsibilities to One Another Following is a summary list of the 51 verses containing specific instances of the Greek word translated "one another" (allēlōn). These declarations and commands are particularly couched within the context of the New Testament Church. This is not a comprehensive list of declarations and commands concerning the relationship of individuals in Christ's Church, but rather just the technical instances of this one Greek term other references like: body, together, each other, others, everyone, all, we, etc. expand this list substantially. Page 2 of 8
confess your sins to one another and pray for one anther (James 5:16) bear and forbear with one another in all of your weaknesses, failings, and infirmities (Eph 4:2) be kind and tender hearted toward one another (Eph 4:32) encourage one another day after day (Heb 3:13) regard one another as more important than yourself (Phil 2:3) rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep (Rom 12:15) look out for the interests of one another (Phil 2:4) clothe yourselves with humility toward one another (1 Peter 5:5) give preference to one another (Rom 12:10) be of the same mind toward one another (Rom 12:16) do not judge one another (Rom 14:13) be at peace with one another (Mark 9:50; Rom 14:19) build up one another (1 Thess 5:11) admonish one another (Rom 15:14) be devoted to one another in brotherly love (Rom 12:10) serve the Lord with one another (Rom 12:11) persevere in tribulation with one another (Rom 12:12) practice hospitality and contribute to the needs of one another (Rom 12:13) have the same care for one another (1 Cor 12:25) do not challenge one another (Gal 5:26) show tolerance for one another (Eph 4:2) do not envy one another (Gal 5:26) serve one another (Gal 5:13) be subject to and submit to one another (Eph 5:21) do not lie to one another (Col 3:9) forgive one another (Col 3:13) comfort one another (1 Thess 4:18) seek after that which is good for one another (1 Thess 5:15) stimulate one another to love and good deeds (Heb 10:24) do not speak against or slander one another (James 4:11) do not complain against one another (James 5:9) love one another (John 13:34, 35; 15:12, 17; Rom 12:10; 13:8; 1 Thess 3:12; 4:9; 2 Thess 1:3; 1 Pet 1:22; 1 John 3:11, 23; 4:7, 11, 12; 2 John 5) Put on then, as God s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. (Col 3:12 15) When I read that passage, my natural inclination is to go right to the 'shoulds.' I immediately make a mental list of all the things I should be compassionate, kind, humble, gentle, patient, and more. Then I try to live out those rules and find I can't do it. The commands are beyond my ability (29). It might feel like he expects the impossible from us (25). We pledge to try harder but fail. The same thing happens when we try to put God's commandments into action (25). Page 3 of 8
But there's an entirely different approach I can take. Instead of starting with what I should do for God, I start with what God has already done for me (29 30). Because God bears with me, I can bear with others. Because he forgives me, I can forgive. Because he loves me, I can love and live in harmony with others (30). You might begin to grasp these gospel truths and think, 'That still seems impossible.' And you're right. You know you should love, but you can't. You know you should do this thing or that, but your willingness and desires aren't there (30). 'I know I should do this, but I just can't... ' is the cry of every honest Christian. And in your own strength, you can't. But you can cry out, 'God, I can't do this. I need your strength.' You can pray, 'God, I know I should forgive. But unless you do a work in my heart, I'm lost.' You will find that God answers those prayers. He does a work of spiritual transformation in you. He softens and opens your heart, changing your desires. It's how you experience the living power of the gospel, Christ in you. (31). We also need to encounter the living power of the gospel, Christ living in us (30). There's not a single part of your life that escapes the impact of the gospel. 6 You can love your enemies You can take initiative in resolving conflict You can admit your own faults You can make conflict an opportunity to witness You might wonder if there's another way to experience real relational health. But every lasting change that takes place in our lives comes from what God does for us in the gospel. 7 All change comes from deepening your understanding of the salvation of Christ and living out of the changes that understanding creates in your heart. Faith in the gospel restructures our motivations, our self understanding, our identity, our view of the world. 8 As we stand in awe of his matchless grace, we find more joy in glorifying God than in pursuing our own selfish ends. When we realize that God has mercy on those who confess their sins, our defensiveness lifts and we are able to admit our wrongs. As we accept and benefit from the way the gospel lovingly shows us our sin, we are inspired to gently correct and restore others who have done wrong. And as we rejoice in the liberating forgiveness of God, we are empowered to go and forgive others in the same way. Through the gospel, God provides both the model and motivation for peacemaking! 9 The gospel, when fully appreciated and embraced, overflows. It's God's power for peacemaking. 10 Page 4 of 8
The worship of God is the end for which you were created. To glorify God is your purpose, it is the answer to the why question of your existence, of your life, and of your salvation. The gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ is the means of making worshippers out of self centered creatures. It is that utterly unique, absolutely astounding, and powerfully divine act of God to save us from ourselves, evil, and God s wrath against our sin; and to restore us unto God, one another, and creation. The gospel is not merely a means. The proper worship of God is inextricably linked with the gospel. We worship God first for who He is and second for what He has done. The gospel takes preeminent place in this second category. Thus, the gospel serves both as a means and as an end of our worship to God. How does this apply to conflict resolution? We must not see the gospel as simply a means to help our relationships. Our relationships should be seen as a means of serving the gospel! Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. (Ephesians 5:31 32) We will not be able to properly apply the gospel to our everyday conflicts until we believe that we exist and have our being in a God centered universe. A man centered gospel will not minister transformative power in our situations of conflict. I am, therefore I do. Theologians make use of grammatical terms to summarize this principle. They say, 'The indicative precedes the imperative.' What God has done for me (the indicative) always comes before what 1 must do (the imperative). When 1 understand and experience what God has done for me, my response moves from 'I should do that' to 'I can do that,' and ultimately to 'I want to do that.' If 1 understand how much 1 have in Christ, the result is glad obedience. If 1 really grasp and enjoy all the benefits of the gospel, the commands aren't a heavy list of rules. They are a joy (33). I'm forgiven in Christ! I don't need to wear a mask of self righteousness. And 1 must not withhold from others the forgiveness God has lavished on me. The more 1 prayed and thought about what Jesus has done for me, the more my heart was drained of pride and self righteousness and filled with the desire and the ability to live out the gospel (33 34). We are to live what in Christ we already are. Worthy of the Gospel The life is to be lived 'worthily [axiōs] of the gospel'; cp. worthily of the Lord, Colossians 1:10; of God, 1 Thessalonians 2:12; 3 John 6; of the calling, Ephesians 4:1. 11 Page 5 of 8
Colossians 1:10 so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God. Romans 12:1 I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Colossians 2:6 Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him 1 Thessalonians 2:12 We exhorted each one of you and encouraged you and charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God, who calls you into his own kingdom and glory. 2 Corinthians 13:11 Finally, brothers, rejoice. Aim for restoration, comfort one another, agree with one another, live in peace; and the God of love and peace will be with you. Only let your manner of life be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving side by side for the faith of the gospel. (Philippians 1:27) 'Selfish ambition, vain conceit, grumbling, and disputing,' for example, are not in keeping with their heavenly citizenship, since they do not reflect the ethical character of the gospel. 12 In the NT the thought of merit is excluded; we are worthy of the gospel only as we receive it. In many expressions a genitive or infinitive is put with áxios to denote the sphere of correspondence (cf. Rom. 16:2). Paul admonishes his readers to walk worthy of the gospel, their calling, and the Lord (1 Th. 2:12; Phil. 1:27; Col. 1:10; Eph. 4:1; cf. 3 Jn. 6), thus linking the motive and goal of Christian action, the motivating power residing in God s prior action. 13 The word that the NIV translates 'conduct yourselves' (politeuesthe) is unusual and probably carries a deeper significance than is immediately apparent from most English translations. It occurs only twice in the New Testament, once here and once in Acts 23:1. In other ancient Greek literature it sometimes means to 'have one s citizenship' or 'home' in a certain city or state, to 'rule' or 'govern the state,' or simply to 'live, conduct oneself, or lead one s life.' 14 You are citizens of heaven; therefore live accordingly, in a manner that is worthy of your king. Similar arguments, taking their point of departure in the language of dying and rising with Christ, new life in the Spirit, etc. occur in Rom. 6, Gal. 5, Col. 3 and elsewhere. To live by the gospel of Christ means above all to live by the example of Christ. 15 The summing up of one s whole life for a Christian is this, to conduct oneself according to Christ s gospel, to announce his grace steadily both to oneself and others, to have hope in him, to do all that one does according to his commands. Marius Victorinus (fl. c. 355 363) 16 Becoming what we are in Christ For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:10) Page 6 of 8
For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age, waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works. (Titus 2:11 14) He has now reconciled in his body of flesh by his death, in order to present you holy and blameless and above reproach before him, if indeed you continue in the faith, stable and steadfast, not shifting from the hope of the gospel that you heard, which has been proclaimed in all creation under heaven, and of which I, Paul, became a minister. (Colossians 1:22 23) But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8) 1. Take Initiative 2. Love Enemies 3. Turn Sin Into an Opportunity to Glorify God I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. (Ephesians 4:1 3) 1. With All Humility 2. With All Gentleness Page 7 of 8
3. With Patience 4. Bearing With One Another in Love 5. Eager For Unity 1 The Peacemaker, 14. 2 Resolving Everyday Conflict, 25. 3 Resolving Everyday Conflict, 26. 4 The Peacemaker, 13. 5 Resolving Everyday Conflict, 25. 6 Resolving Everyday Conflict, 31. 7 Resolving Everyday Conflict, 31. 8 Tim Keller, quoted in Resolving Everyday Conflict, 32. 9 The Peacemaker, 14. 10 Resolving Everyday Conflict, 34. 11 Vine s Expository Dictionary, s.v. axiōs. 12 Fee, Philippians, 162 63. 13 Kittel, TDNT, 63. 14 Thielman, Philippians, 92. 15 Bockmuehl, Philippians, 98. 16 Ancient Christian Commentary Series, 231. Page 8 of 8