JEALOUSY IS A POISON Today we are going to look at a very negative emotion, an emotion that can trap and destroy us. I believe that jealousy is one of the most destructive emotions we can nurse. But I m not just going to talk about it in the abstract I want you to identify a connection point with this emotion. When I was growing up, for reasons I won t explain, I had a friend who was jealous of me, and it cut me, some comments, some experiences left me damaged. Strangely enough I also know my friend loved me. But the poison was there. That sense of resentment, that tinge of envy, that whiff of covetousness. Do you know what it feels like for someone to be jealous of you? And I can do it too, it s usually envy that I am tempted with, someone who s ministry is going better than mine. As with all sin, it s not a sin when it first pops into your head, it s a sin when you nurse it, when you welcome it, when you receive it and nurture it when you cultivate covetousness you reap the whirlwind envy and Jealousy. What are you tempted to envy? Cars? Houses? Children? Gold Class Seats? Money? Travel? JEALOUSY IS A POISON AND IT KILLS EVERY-THING IT TOUCHES Let me cut to the chase of the message today. Jealousy is poison and it kills everything it touches. God has given us positive and negative emotions, a pallet of emotions; but this one is one of the most lethal. I really want to warn you today jealousy kills. It is not an emotion to play with. It eats us up inside, and it comes from a fear of missing out, from greed for more, form a desire to control the love of another. Jealousy is like a chemical pollutant poured into the river ways of your soul, and the only thing that can neutralise it is dilution by love, the love of God poured out in you and for you. If this message touches something painful in you God has a solution for you. He really does. But you need to seek him. Jealousy is like a cancer growing in our soul, and Jesus is the great surgeon of our souls.
CAIN ATTACKED HIS BROTHER ABEL AND KILLED HIM. GEN 4.8 Cain and Abel are the first brothers recorded in the bible, and both make an offering to God, one was a qualitatively better than the other and God approved that. Cain exhibited the classic features of jealousy, he was angry and his face was downcast. God spoke to him and warned him. Sin is crouching at your door, it desires to have you, you can rule over it. But he doesn t instead he kills his brother. Did he intend to? That is where jealousy leads death. When you look at jealousy in the bible it leads to death. As I looked at it this week it was incredibly sobering jealousy leads to death and not life. Joseph s brothers were jealous of him, he provoked their jealousy by telling incredible stories about them bowing down to him, and they tried to kill him. Genesis 37. Let us be careful not to provoke jealousy, but nevertheless they were (and we are) responsible for their actions. GET RID OF THAT SLAVE WOMAN AND HER SON. GEN 21.10 It s same with women, Abraham tried to short-circuit God s plan for him by having a child with his slave-girl Hagar, and then when his wife Sarah finally had her own child she was possessed by jealousy and commanded her husband to send Hagar away, to abandon her in the desert to certain death. Jealousy leads to death. God rescued Hagar but there was an enmity created by Sarah s jealousy that poisoned future generations. Again Hagar might have mocked Sarah, more likely Sarah though she was being mocked, but Sarah s response was frightening. She was jealous for her husband and his wealth and his love and so she was prepared to Kill. Jealousy is so often at the heart of domestic violence.
JEALOUSY AROUSES A HUSBAND S FURY. PR 6.34 The bible addresses this directly in Proverbs 6.34. Jealousy arouses a husband s fury. You see the bible doesn t teach everything it records, here Solomon has observed that jealousy, nursed and cultivated, fed on, arouses fury. And fury is a violent word. It is tragic that homes, which should be places of love and nurture often end up being places of fury. What does this teach us be careful of jealousy and what it can do. I think of the case of the former policeman in Invercargill whose wife left him and he murdered her and tried to murder her new lover. Now it s OK to understand that Jealousy can produce incredibly strong emotions, but violence is not OK. Violence never recovers love that is lost. When someone stops loving you, you need to give them freedom. Jealousy will only eat you up inside and then destroy you and everything it touches. We have seen that with the shooting of Verity McLean in Invercargill, her life was taken and her career finished, the killer went to jail and his career destroyed, her parents were broken, his family was broken, their children were devastated, and the community was left in total shock. Jealousy is a poison and it destroyed everything it touches. THE FEAR OF THE LORD IS THE BEGINNING OF WISDOM. OK those of you who have read a bit of the bible know that in the bible God says, I am a jealous God. The bible uses the word qanna a word only ever used of God. Perhaps all emotions have their source in God, but I think only God can manage jealousy without it destroying; and with God he is jealous of anyone or anything that would steal what is rightly his. I would suggest that within God jealousy and anger are in fact expression of his protective love towards those would oppose him, or damaged his loved ones. The scriptures talk of God being jealous of other so called god s that would steal his people away from him. God is jealous of the things that would steal our worship from him. And we set ourselves up to encounter God s wrath if we set ourselves up against God. If we try to steal his money, if we try to steal the innocence of his children, if we try to steal his glory. The scripture says the fear of the lord
is the beginning of wisdom. There is a place for us to fear God if we are trying to destroy what he loves. He loves us, but he will not allow evil to go unchecked. So if you have stolen from God, if you have stolen the innocence of his children, if you have stolen his glory then be afraid be very afraid. Because God is a jealous God, and only God can handle this white hot emotion. What is the answer to God s righteous jealousy; and his steadfast love? The cross, the cross, the cross where God fused his anger at evil, his jealousy for his glory and his love for his people in a redemptive way. If you know you haven t come to Christ yet, you haven t surrendered your life to him and sought his forgiveness. Don t wait another day. Today is the day to be forgiven. Because as Hebrews says, It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God. SON YOU ARE ALWAYS WITH ME AND ALL THAT IS MINE IS YOURS. LK 15.31. What causes us as people to feel jealous? Often it is fear of missing out on love, fear of not being loved as much, or it can be greed, or envy. Or coveting, I want what you have. And so the scriptures warn us to be mindful of not boasting of our wealth or our success, partly because that can incite jealousy. But the really deep jealousies I think come from a sense that someone is loved more than I am. Sibling rivalry often appears when one child thinks that they are loved more than another. Now sometimes that is a true analysis, but often it s not. Some families will work really hard to be very carefully fair between their children. But in truth we often need to treat people differently to treat them the same. If you love guitar then buying you a new guitar is going to make your heart sing, but if you don t really love guitar then getting a new one because your brother did is a bit of a dud present. I think jealousy is often provoked by that feeling that she doesn t love me like she loves him. Parents, teachers, leaders let us be careful not to have favourites, but like God to love equally.
So once again what is the effect of jealousy it corrodes friendship and love, it is hard to be in relationship with someone you know resents you and is jealous of you. It is hard to love someone that you are jealous of, and these things spread down through generations. When you see a jealousy between siblings it will pass down to the next generation. It will spread to work mates and colleagues. It is a pollutant that poisons the well of human kindness So what do we do about it apart from avoid it. 3 things. Discover just how much your heavenly father loves you. Worship is incredibly good for the soul. Often we are keen to get out on mission, but we need to begin everyday with worship. To encounter the one who truly loves us. When we are feeling the joy of the lord. When we are wrapped in the love of our saviour. Suddenly petty jealousy s start to melt away, to dilute in the love of God. God is not a man. He does not love anyone more than you, he loves you with all his love, like a mighty tide, and if you make time to experience his love, then you will be less bothered by jealousy. One solution to pollution is dilution, so fill your life with the love of God and the pollution of jealousy will melt away. Follow the biblical injunction, love your enemy, pray for those you are jealous of or who are jealous of you and bless them. Give more to the one you think deserves less because of God s goodness. Love your enemies, give to them. Bless them, with God s help. That s the prayer and as you feel the prayers of blessing sticking in your throat your heavenly father will be smiling on you and he will take your poultry effects and give then affect. As you feel that bitter envy, present it to God and he will heal you. If you become aware of the damage you have done to community and family. Bring that also to God. And be free. Ask God to give you insight, and he will let you have another perspective, he will help you to see the needs and the hurts of your adversary, and he will melt your heart. Jealousy is poison and it kills everything it touches, remember that. This is not an emotion to play with. This is a drug like methamphetamine, don t play with it it will take you over and suck you in and destroy you from the insight out. Poison, biohazard, beware. But also know, it is a poison that Jesus can drain from you. It is a poison that he sucked into his soul on the cross and he neutralised. To God be the Glory. Amen.