Deeply CONNECTED How To Write Liturgy Dorothy McRae-McMahon
ABOUT THE AUTHOR Dorothy McRae-McMahon is a retired minister in the Uniting Church in Australia. For ten years she was a minister with the Pitt Street Uniting Church in the centre of Sydney and then for five years the National Director for Mission for her church. She has written nine books of liturgy and was a member of the World Council of Churches Worship Committee for its Canberra Assembly and Moderator of its Worship Committee for the Harare Assembly the first and only woman to be given that role. She has written for three subscription series related to the Revised Common Lectionary Words for Worship in Australia and New Zealand, Logos for the United Church of Christ in the United States of America and Seasons of the Spirit for the United Church of Canada. She was also asked by the High Commissioner for South Africa to create and preside over the official Memorial Service for Nelson Mandela in Sydney. She is now active in the Uniting Church in South Sydney and co-edits the South Sydney Herald. Her community awards indicate her interests and concerns. She has received: A Jubilee Medal from the Queen for work with women in NSW (1977) An Australian Government Peace Award (1986) The Australian Human Rights Medal (1988) Edna Ryan Award for being The Grand Stirrer 2014 An Honorary Doctorate of Letters from Macquarie University in Sydney for work with minorities and her contribution to the spiritual life of the community (1992) Previous Publications: Being Clergy, Staying Human (Alban Institute, Washington 1992) Echoes of Our Journey - Liturgies of the People (JBCE 1993) The glory of blood, sweat and tears - Liturgies for living and dying (JBCE 1996) Liturgies for the Journey of Life (SPCK London 2000) Prayers for Life s Particular Moments (SPCK London 2001 and Desbooks 2001) Everyday Passions - a conversation on living (ABC Books 1998) 3
Daring Leadership in the 21st Century (ABC Books July 2001) In this hour - liturgies for pausing (SPCK London 2001 & Desbooks 2002) Rituals for life, love and loss (Jane Curry Publishing 2003) Memoirs of moving on (Jane Curry Publishing 2004) Liturgies for daily life (SPCK London 2004) Worship for the young in years (MediaCom 2005, SPCK 2007) Liturgies for High Days (SPCK London 2006, MediaCom 2007) In life and in death (MediaCom 2009) Bringing the Word to life together Year A Bringing the Word to life together Year B Bringing the Word to life together Year C (Written with Rev. Andrew Collis and published by MediaCom) A life and death conversation with Ali (MediaCom 2013) 4
INTRODUCTION I am writing this book at the request of one of the staff of the Uniting Church in Australia s New South Wales Synod. She was responding to my complaining that, when people were planning some sort of combined service, such as A Lament for Refugees or Grieving with Adult Survivors of Child Abuse, I was always being asked to write it. While I was honoured to be asked, I felt that, at the age of eighty, I should be handing over such responsibilities to younger people. Then I reflected that few people had been given the national and international experiences that I had been fortunate to experience. For example, when we were preparing the liturgies for the World Council of Churches Assemblies in Canberra and Harare, I was invited to write most of them and then to respond to the critique from the Worship Committees concerned. In doing that, I learned so much from these church leaders significant people representing the various denominations which form the World Council of Churches. Even if they preferred not to write the liturgies, they knew what they were looking at and gave profound and experienced critiques of what I had written. Also, I began writing liturgy when I was the Minister of the Pitt Street Uniting Church in the centre of Sydney. One of the things which influenced this beginning was that we were being attacked, for two years, by a Neo-Nazi group because of the stands we were taking against racism, homophobia and South African apartheid. We went through a very hard time together while this was happening and one of the things we found was that our liturgical life was central to our survival, courage and renewal. Initially we prepared much of the liturgy in a group process and I will be including the way in which we did this in this book. I also found that liturgies (or rituals) were often a very significant part of pastoral care and that, when we truly respect the spirituality and levels of religiosity in people, they are often drawn to make contact with the church. Not that you would offer this aspect in order to gain new members you do it for its own sake. 5
For that reason, I will discuss the creation of pastoral liturgies/rituals alongside religious liturgies. Liturgy writing is a truly privileged part of the life of the church and community and I give thanks to God and to those who have invited me to do it. 6
SOME BASIC GUIDELINES FOR THE ACTUAL WRITING OF LITURGY Obviously, liturgy writers need some level of capability in writing poetry, because it really is a form of prose poetry. This is clearly not a matter of rhyming words at the end of lines, but of a reasonably elegant use of words which come together in a flowing rhythm. It is important to use simple words which are in common usage, but not colloquial. Colloquial words may seem friendly but they are often not recognised by all the people who may use the liturgy and they take away from the sense of dignity and creative levels of formality. Phrases like fair dinkum or best mate don t usually resonate well with most people. Also, the fewer syllables in the words, the easier they are to read, especially for group responses. The language of liturgy is moderate rather than extreme. People feel violated if we take them into words which they find disturbing. I often wonder what some people feel when they sing the line of the hymn Amazing grace which refers to a wretch like me. Indeed, I usually introduce the hymn by telling people that such extreme language was due to the fact that the hymn writer was a converted slave owner. Especially in prayers of confession, we can be tempted to think that the more vividly we describe our sinfulness, the more genuine our confession will be. In fact, it is more about using words which invite people into a humble and honest space before a gracious God that makes it more likely that they are able to face their realities. While public worship can be contextual, relevant and strong, the liturgy needs to unite us as far as possible. Never use liturgy to try to improve the people. Prayers which arise from our concern for others can be framed in that way, rather than damning those with whom we disagree. It is not about making people confess the sins you see them as having, or praying for your political or religious agendas, except in very general terms. If you want people to pray for specific causes and issues, it is best to give a simple introductory prayer and then invite them if they wish to offer their own prayers (possibly as they light a small candle) or in a silence. 7
New imagery and thought forms ground the liturgy and refresh it, while the dignity of older forms reminds us that we are part of the church universal. Both are appropriate. However, use of older images does not have to be clichéd. Flowery language does not work well more is not necessarily better. Especially in funeral liturgies, people often use all sorts of flowery words to describe God as though that may be more comforting to those who grieve. However, often it alienates them, especially if they are not close to the church. Simplicity subtly tells people that we respect the variety of people present and that we can truly be together in a sad moment, with a God who just holds us in love, whoever we are or have been. Probably the most popular liturgy I ever wrote was for a simple funeral: A SIMPLE RELIGIOUS FUNERAL OPENING Friends, we have come together because we loved (name) as (mother, brother, family, friend etc) Here we will mourn her/him leaving us, honour her/his life and death, reverently farewell her/his body and comfort each other. We have come believing that all human life is valuable, that the truth and integrity and hopefulness which resides in each life, lives on. We come, believing that (name s) life, which we celebrate today and for which we now experience great loss, is joined in the eternal continuum of human endeavour stretching into the past and into the future. 8
Her/his life was lived in its uniqueness with us and has now passed into the ultimate community of human existence. The gifts and graces which she/he offered are never lost to us. The creativity which she/he brought to us in her/his life and relationships lies now within our own lives and travels into the future with us. (If appropriate) Our lives are more beautiful because we lived with her/him. FOUR CANDLES The first candle represents our grief - The pain of losing you (Name) is with us and the flame of light will shine on our tears and warm us as we honour your life. The second candle represents courage- That which lay in your life and the strength which we will give to each other in our loss The third candle we light for memories It celebrates your human journey with us, the times when we laughed and cried together, the gifts which you gave to us and those we gave to you, the hard times and the good and the life which your life invited in us all. 9
The forth candle celebrates love- It shines forth in joy as we know that love never dies. It goes on from person to person, from moment to moment in every age and adds to the life of the universe in delight. Thanks be to you, whose love still surrounds us and thanks be to God. PRAYER OR SILENT REFECTION O God, at this moment, as we come face to face with death and our own mortality, we have many feelings as well as grief, and possibly fear for the future. Please come close to us with your love, travel with us into this serious moment and open our hearts to each other. We ask it in the name of Jesus Christ who faced his own death and the death of a friend. Amen. READINGS Traditional and/or contemporary 10
REFLECTION None of us know the whole truth about what lies beyond death. Christians believe that as we journey between life and death, we are safe in the hands of an infinitely gracious God. We believe that death invites us into total awareness and to know with truth whether what we have valued in ourselves has eternal value. The God who stands with us at that moment is the same God who was prepared to die in love for all humankind, a God who has entered every struggle of our life with us and who deeply understands the choices we have made. TRIBUTES (The things we would like to remember about the person) The minister moves to the casket and placing a hand on it says: (Name), all these things and more you have given to us. We respect your journey through life, with all of its realities. We pray that you will travel safely in this next part of your journey. Our love goes with you. Let us pray or reflect in silence on this life and what it has meant to us: (silent prayer/reflection) Thanks be to God for the gifts we have received in this person. Thanks be to God for a life lived with (courage, honesty, grace, determination - as appropriate) If a burial We will now accompany you to your final resting place. (The casket is carried to the grave) 11
THE FAREWELL As we come to the moment of farewell, part of our grief may be regret for things done or left undone, words said, or never said, or moments that never happened. This is the time to lay aside all those regrets and to honour the spirit of (name) herself/himself who would never want them carried into our future. Let us receive that gift of generosity from (name) and the forgiveness of God. (silent reflection) To love someone is to risk the pain of parting. Not to love is never to have lived. The grief which we now experience is the honouring of our love. Let us now in a quiet moment make our farewell to (name) (silence) SENDING OUT Go in peace, (Name). Fly free into universal life, held safe in the hollow of God s hand. Soar with joy on the winds of heaven and celebrate with lightness of being all that has been and all that is to come. Dance in delight among those who have gone before and who will greet you with joy. Then hover low over those who have loved you 12
and touch our lives kindly with your gentle heart. Go in grace and carry our love and thankfulness with you. Amen. THE COMMITTAL If a burial And now let us commit her/his body to the earth which is welcoming to us at the time of our death. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. In the cycle of life and death the earth is replenished and life is eternally renewed. If a cremation And now let us commit her/his body to the elements which are gentle to us at the time of our death. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. In the cycle of life and death the earth is replenished and life is eternally renewed Go in peace (name). Travel safely with our love into the hands of God. Amen. BLESSING AND DISMISSAL Even as we grieve this loss, let us commit ourselves to the comfort of those who miss her/him most especially (names) Let us surround them with our love and pray for the comfort of God. 13
And now let us go into the world, glad that we have loved, free to weep for the one we have lost, free to hold each other in our human frailty, empowered to live life to the full as did (name) and to affirm the hope of human existence. And may God be our company, Christ Jesus walk before us and the Spirit surround us with a cloud of grace. Amen. I recall, when we first began using simple liturgies for people who asked us to take funerals at Pitt Street Uniting Church, respecting that they were not necessarily religious, they almost always visited our church service shortly after, as they appreciated the respect they had been given and wanted to see what sort of church we were. Here is the wording of the most popular liturgy for those people: A SIMPLE NON-RELIGIOUS FUNERAL OPENING Friends, we have come together because we loved (Name) as (mother, brother, family, friend etc) Here we will mourn her/him leaving us, honour her/his life and death, reverently farewell her/his body and comfort each other. 14