Now What? Part Two: The Secret to Contentment F. Remy Diederich 8.19.18 Outline: 1. A NOW WHAT situation can be when God does his deepest work in you, or you grow bitter. 2. We can all learn the secret to contentment: God will give you what you need in every circumstance. 3. David tells us two things: trust in God, stay faithful. 4. Downward spiral: loss of control >anger >fear >envy >resentment >bitterness >depression >despair. 5. When you trust in God you can continue to be generous in spite of your circumstances. Going Deeper: use the following questions for personal reflection and to discuss with family, friends and your small group. 1. Have you encountered, or heard about, any NOW WHAT situations this past week? What are they? 2. Read Philippians 4:10-13. Paul said that he LEARNED contentment. Have you learned it? Do you think it s possible? What has kept you from learning it so far? 3. Read Psalm 37:1-11. What was the NOW WHAT situation the people faced? What was David s solution? 4. What is the reward that David promised people who obeyed his teaching? 5. Remy mentioned a downward spiral that often happens during hardship. What is it and which of the words can you relate to the most? Why is that? 6. Read Psalm 37:21-29. Why is it that we can be generous even during hard times? Are you able to do this? If not, why not? What will help you to be more generous with your time, gratitude, forgiveness, and finances? 7. Read Psalm 37:39,40. How might these words encourage you in a NOW WHAT situation? 8. Pray for people you know going through NOW WHAT situations. Message This little video is a good metaphor for what I m calling a NOW WHAT situation. A NOW WHAT situation is something that happens in your life where you are suddenly stuck...or stranded on an island...so to speak, with no way out. It might be a dead end job, a bad relationship, failing health or finances that are flatlined. You don t know what to do, and the truth is, sometimes there s nothing you CAN do, which makes life very hard. 1
NOW WHAT situations aren t an aberration. They should be an expectation. In other words, hard times come to everyone. We don t like to admit that. In fact, we often use our faith in God to live in denial, hoping that God would never let hard times come our way, ignoring the fact that almost every Bible story is about overcoming hardship not escaping it. The Bible teaches us that a NOW WHAT situation can be when God does his deepest work in you, or it can be a time when you become bitter and end up walking away from God. How you respond is a defining moment. It will set the trajectory for your life. And that s why I want to help you face your NOW WHAT situations. The Apostle Paul had a number of NOW WHAT situations in his life. He suffered many hardships and that s why it s so remarkable that he said this: I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation Philippians 4 :12 This is amazing. Can you imagine being content in any and EVERY situation? Think about it. I mean, if you drop your car off to get an oil change and they call you saying they found a major issue that will cost you $2000, chances are, that you won t feel content, right? And that might be just one thing in your day. If you hate your job and struggle in your marriage... if your finances are tight, and your health is suffering, how is it even possible to be content? Yet Paul said he had it down. Even with all the hardship he faced, he knew how to be content. So, that s amazing, but what I really like about what Paul said is that he learned the secret of being content. He LEARNED it. It wasn t a gift that he was given. He wasn t born with it. That means it s possible for you and me to learn the same secret. We have the potential of achieving this same state of contentedness. And here s Paul s secret: I can do all this through him who gives me strength... And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:13,19 He said, I m content because I m convinced that God will meet all of my needs. And the same is true for you. You TOO can be content because God will meet your needs. But...the question is: what does that look like? How exactly does God give you the strength to be content no matter what the circumstance? Well, It has everything to do with adjusting your perspective. You see, you can t always change your circumstances, but you can always change your perspective. And so that s what I want to help us with today. There are many places I could take us in the Bible to help us, but I m going to take us to a psalm that has helped me through the years. Psalm 37. Psalm 37 was written by King David to people in a NOW WHAT Situation. Evil people were prospering, and God s people felt like they were on the verge of being crushed. They were afraid that God had abandoned them. Maybe you feel that way today. And so David wrote this psalm to address their concerns. 2
Do not fret (burn with anger) because of those who are evil or be envious of those who do wrong; for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away. Psalm 37:1,2 David assured the people that they weren t the ones who were about to expire. It was the evil doers who were about to expire. Evil may last for a season. It may even last for a lifetime. But evil will not last forever. God will set things right in the end. So David tells them to do some things that are counterintuitive, that is, the opposite of what you might think. Instead of doubting God s love and presence, he said: Trust in the LORD Psalm 37:3 Seriously? When bad things happen to people, trusting God is the last thing they feel like doing. I just heard it again this week: through tears someone asked me, how can I believe in a God of love when there are so many bad things that happen to people? So David s recommendation was the opposite of what people were probably thinking. But David didn t apologize for it or feel the need to give all kinds of reasons why people should trust God. He just said to do it. And then he added to it by saying:...and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness. Psalm 37:3 David aims for our heart here because when we are suffering in a NOW WHAT situation we don t always want to do good, do we? Quite frankly, we often think our situation is a good excuse to do bad. We are more prone to feel sorry for ourselves and give into temptation. We think we deserve a break today. We might give ourselves permission to fly off the handle or hold a pity-party. In verse one, David mentioned two bad things that we often do. He said don t be angry and don t be envious. When bad things happen, it s easy to be mad at the world. You get mad at the situation. Mad at the people responsible. Mad at God. Maybe mad at yourself for getting into the situation in the first place. And then it s easy to look around at people who are living the high life and envy them. It s like they are living on easy street while you are climbing a mountain every day and sliding back down every night. Why do they have it so easy when every day life is a struggle for you? You see, envy and anger often come with NOW WHAT situations. David said: Be careful. Don t go there. Instead, do good and cultivate, or develop, faithfulness. In other words, it s easy to love and serve God when everything is working in your life. But true devotion is shown when times are tough. Will you still love and serve God when nothing is going your way? David said, this is an opportunity to prove your love for God. These words of David are what kept me going through many hard years in my life. Whether it was the years that I owned a money-sucking dairy farm or I was stuck in a deadend 3
ministry setting, I felt like God was saying to me, Remy, Don t whine about it. Don t envy others. Don t worry. Just be faithful. Live your life for me. Honor me in everything you do, even if your life will never be good again. That s what it means to cultivate faithfulness, you commit to doing the right thing, no matter what the cost. David built on this theme by offering three commands and one promise: Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn, your vindication like the noonday sun. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; Psalm 37:4-7 The first command is to take delight in the Lord. That is: when you can t delight in your circumstances, you can always delight in the Lord. Don t stop worshipping him just because life is hard. The second command is to commit your way to the Lord. The word commit literally means to roll. So the idea is to roll your problems onto God. It s another way of saying, trust God with your problems. He may lead you through a desert, but trust that he ll bring you through. The final command is: Be still and wait patiently. The word for still is literally to be silent. And the word in Hebrew for wait patiently means to bear pain. So a literal and honest translation would be: Be silent as you wait in pain. What David is advising here is that a person who trusts God shouldn t be constantly complaining or asking why me? They shouldn t jump to conclusions and accuse God of abandoning them. Their pain filled silence is a sign to God that they trust him. David offers a promise here. He said that God will give them the desires of their heart. Which is this: He will make their righteous reward shine like the dawn, their vindication like the noonday sun. In other words, the desire of their heart was for justice. They wanted to know that God would reward them for their suffering. David said: Absolutely. You will come out on top in the end. God will reward you for your faithfulness. You may not know the reason for your suffering now, but in the end it will all make sense. It might take a year, or twenty years, or maybe not until you get to heaven, but you will be vindicated. Then David came back to the idea of anger:...do not fret (remember: burn with anger) when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret it leads only to evil. Psalm 37:7,8 Anger is a huge temptation when you are in a NOW WHAT situation. And, if left unchecked, it can lead to so many ugly things. It all starts with a loss of control. You get stuck in some 4
kind of hardship. Your hands are tied and helpless to change your circumstances. You just have to sit there and take whatever is dished out. There s a downward spiral that can easily kick in when you lose control. First you get angry, then you become fearful, wondering, where is this thing headed? How bad is it going to get? Then you look around and see how good everyone has it, so you experience envy and jealousy. Then your resentment grows, not just at your situation but at how good everyone else has it, as well as toward God for not helping you out. But it doesn t stop there. Your resentment can turn to bitterness, and self-pity is a close companion, followed by depression and eventually despair. Hopelessness. When I read about teen suicide I think it has to do with this downward spiral. Kids can have so many pressures going on in their lives. Their family might be a mess with addiction and abuse. Their friends might be rejecting them. They feel the pressure to get good grades so they can make it into college. They might be busy working a job. They are really attempting to manage so many adult dilemmas when they are still so young. Sometimes their despair leads them to give up the fight. This is true for adults too. Now, most people don t want to admit this dark side of themselves. So that s when our denial kicks in and we start to look for ways to numb our emotions. Pick your poison, it might be drugs, alcohol, pornography, an affair, an eating disorder...the list is endless. But whatever your choice, it s not pretty. It might NUMB the problem, but it never SOLVES the problem. This is the opposite of contentment, right? I m not trying to bum us out. But this is where many people are living! That s why we need to pull back the curtain, look at this, and figure out the secret to contentment. Now, you can look at this downward spiral and beat yourself up about what a mess you are, or you can own it and invite God into the mess. Yup, that s me. I have no control over this area of my life, but that doesn t mean I m without hope. For example... When I get on an airplane I m out of control, but I still have hope. Why? Because I fully trust the person flying the plane. I can sit in the back and take a nap, or read a book, or watch a movie. Even when we go through turbulence I m not freaking out, all worried at how to handle the situation. I m fine because I know the airline has trained the pilot to handle the situation Well, let me tell you, we have Someone in charge of our lives who is much more capable than a pilot. God is in control. And so, the secret to contentment is to stop looking out the window at your circumstances and focus on who s flying the plane. 5
You can t change your circumstances. Your job is to change your PERSPECTIVE, and you do that by trusting God instead of doubting him. Imagine if you invested all your time doubting into trusting God instead? Don t run around saying that the sky is falling. Be still and trust that God will take you through the storm to the other side. In fact, by knowing that God is in control, you can even be generous. Look at what David says here: The wicked borrow and do not repay, but the righteous give generously...they are always generous and lend freely; Psalm 37:21,26 You know, it s so easy to turn inward when you are hurting. It s so easy to shut down, and isolate, and curl up in the fetal position. But David said, no, if you trust God you don t have to put your generosity on hold. You can keep being generous. That s part of what it means to cultivate faithfulness. Choosing to be generous is your way of telling yourself and the world that God is bigger than your circumstances. You aren t going to let your circumstances define you. You are going to define your circumstances by trusting God and being generous. There is some interesting research going on these days about generosity and the science of happiness. Research shows that there are three acts of generosity you can do to increase your happiness quotient: 1. Show kindness on a daily basis 2. Forgive those who have hurt you 3. Offer gratitude to those who have helped you One research group has posted videos about their studies. What they do is invite people into their lab and give them an initial test to assess their level of happiness and then ask them to do one of three things. They send people out to do random acts of kindness. They have people write a letter expressing their forgiveness to someone who hurt them. And three, they have people call their friends to tell them how grateful they are to have them in their lives. And the point is, without fail, these acts of generosity increase their happiness. Acts of generosity change their perspective on life. In the course of the research, the researchers were surprised by one woman who scored a perfect score on her happiness test BEFORE she did any of their exercises. In other words, she couldn t be any happier. Imagine that. She has learned the secret to being content. So let s see what we can learn from her. Show Video: Woman Gets Perfect Score on Happiness Test. Youtube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kkku2_lw1m8 6
Notice that her happiness wasn t based on her circumstances but her perspective. What she didn t say here is that she opened her home to troubled teens in Watts, California. Her positive perspective has caused her to be generous. David concludes by saying: Turn from evil and do good; then you will dwell in the land forever. For the LORD loves the just and will not forsake his faithful ones. Psalm 37:27,28 You can take that to the bank. You can choose to do good by being generous because you know that God loves you and is with you. Last week, after my first message in this series, someone wrote me to thank me for my message. And then they shared how much they ve grown in their ability to face NOW WHAT situations. This is some of what this person wrote (they gave me permission): In this last 'Now What' experience I faced I think I got closer to responding in the way that you encouraged today. I was broken, sick to my stomach, confused, displaced and had a lot of emotions BUT I chose to pray and look to God and DAYS after feeling a rush of many emotions--continually praying, worshiping through music and and reaching out to a select few people... I prayed a prayer I hadn't before... God help me and give me the strength to surrender my feelings to you and allow me to see...this situation through your eyes. Fill me with grace and mercy to love others but still speak truth when needed. I never expected to be here but use this experience to teach me, to shape my character and then when you believe I am ready use these experience to help others. This person, like Paul, is learning the secret to contentment. They are learning to invite God into the mess rather than be mad at him for allowing the mess to happen. I hope you can do the same. Don t let your Now What situations go to waste. Let them be a season when God does his deepest work in you. 7