THE EPISCOPAL DIOCESE OF MAINE THEOLOGICAL TASK FORCE FOR THE STUDY OF MARRIAGE & THE BLESSING OF UNIONS Dear People of the Diocese: Maine s 191 st Diocesan Convention in 2010 passed a resolution directing the Bishop and Council to appoint a Diocesan Theological Task Force.to collect and prepare materials pertaining to the theology of Marriage and of the blessing of Unions and to initiate conversations in the diocese. The task force was appointed, and we have been gathering materials and talking to other dioceses which have been doing similar work. We have decided, with great enthusiasm, to recommend to the Diocese of Maine study materials prepared by General Convention s Standing Commission on Liturgy and Music (Faith, Hope and Love: Theological Resources for the Blessing of Same-Gender Relationships) and a collection of sermons and articles entitled Writings on Marriage prepared by the Diocese of North Carolina. For your convenience, we are sending one copy of these documents to each of Maine s congregations, along with a Study Guide. The materials will also be available on the diocesan website. We hope that all congregations will create opportunities to read and study them. In anticipation of workshops that will take place at Diocesan Convention this fall, we encourage all clergy and delegates to engage in conversations about these materials before Diocesan Convention on October 26 and 27. Like most dioceses of the Episcopal Church opinions and perspectives vary here in Maine. Our ability to follow where the Spirit is leading us with regard to these important matters of faith is heightened when we converse with a wider variety of people, in other words beyond our individual congregations. Diocesan Convention provides a natural opportunity to do just this. While much attention these days is focused on the definition of marriage and the blessing of unions, the Task Force believes that the conversation should be far broader: exploring our church s perspective on marriage, our prayer book, the history and theology of marriage, relationships, covenants, faith and family. In time we imagine the scope of our work together expanding to include resources for marriage preparation and marriage enrichment as well as pastoral and liturgical resources for couples and families facing separation and divorce, focusing more broadly on marriage and family. But, even as we look forward to expanding the scope of our conversations, we must still attend to the matters before us. In his Pastoral Letter of March 8, 2012, Bishop Lane wrote about General Convention this summer and the resolution, which has now passed, approving an official rite for the blessing of couples of the same gender. He wrote about Maine s marriage equality ballot initiative in November and his support for all efforts to educate and converse about these matters. It is the hope and expectation of the Task Force that the study materials we are putting forward will assist in inspiring deep conversation that, as Bishop Lane wrote in his Letter, graciously reflects our awareness that, despite who we are, despite our varied opinions and experiences, we are all children of God and that Christ abides in each of us. And because, as he also points out, the votes this summer and fall will not resolve issues related to faith and sexuality, our conversing will need to continue well into the foreseeable future. May God richly bless us all as we begin! Faithfully, The Rev. Dan Riggall, The Rev. Anne Stanley, The Rev. Calvin Sanborn, The Rev Marguerite Steadman, The Rev. Kit Wang
Study Guide for Faith, Hope and Love & Writings on Marriage (adapted from the Study Guide for Writings on Marriage prepared by the Episcopal Diocese of North Carolina) Some suggestions for group or individual study I. Some suggestions for facilitators for group study Ministry in adult Christian formation: Welcome to this opportunity for ministry! Acting as a facilitator to a group who wish to reflect on our calling to engage with one another about matters of faith is a service to the Church. Blessings to you in this role. Purpose of the study: Our hope is that this study will explore the wealth of resources within our tradition for thinking about Christian marriage and the blessing of holy unions encourage deeper thought and dialogue about this key theme in the Christian tradition; strengthen the sense of God s presence amongst and within us during conversation; inspire curiosity to continue to learn about Christian marriage and why this matters; inspire a deeper passion to continue to engage in Christ s mission in the world; contribute to strengthening the sense of community among ourselves and beyond our own immediate context; affirm the biblical foundations of our faith; and challenge us to relate study and reflection to action in the name of Christ. Guidelines for Conversations about Marriage (Based on A Covenant For Civil Discourse of the Maine Council of Churches) Let the Baptismal Covenant (BCP 304-5) be the guiding principle for all your conversations, particularly the covenantal commitment we make to seek and serve Christ in all persons, loving your neighbor as yourself and to respect the dignity of every human being. (It is advisable to begin, at least the first session, with a recital of the Baptismal Covenant.) Specific suggestions for enacting the Baptismal Covenant in your conversations are: 1. Avoid assuming that your church community is of one political or theological mind-set, i.e. liberal, open, conservative, traditional, etc. Rather assume that there is a wide variety of opinions, beliefs and experiences in your congregation, that all are children of God, and that each must be respected, especially those with whom you disagree. 2. Speak from your own experience, using I statements such as I have experience or I think and refrain from speaking for others, to others or about others, such as, They thing this or, You people do such and such. 7 AUGUST 2012 STUDY GUIDE 1
3. Avoid classifying other people into groups and making generalized statements such as All married people behave or, All gay people believe 4. Refrain from personal attacks on other people and their experiences. 5. Refrain from statements which characterize others as evil. 6. Refuse to make any untrue statements. 7. Above all, speak honestly for yourself from the Spirit that is within you and listen for Christ speaking in others. Structuring the sessions: We anticipate that conversation on these materials could occur successfully in a Sunday morning adult forum or perhaps in regional gatherings; ask people to read the materials you would like to discuss ahead of time and then have conversations about it/them. If more time is desired, then of course times other than Sunday morning provide greater flexibility. It is not necessary to read all the material in Writings on Marriage or to read them in the order they are in the booklet. You will likely want to read both Writings on Marriage and Faith, Hope and Love in their entirety and then decide which parts make sense for adults in your church. For example, a five-session program could be as follows: Session 1 Introduction and Essentials by Greg Jones from Writings on Marriage Overview: Theological Reflection on Same Gender Relationships and The Church s Call: A Focus on Mission from Faith, Hope and Love Session 2 Marriage: Liturgy for Living by Charles Price and Louis Weil from Writings on Marriage The Church s Joy: A Theology of Blessing from Faith, Hope and Love Session 3 You have to be crazy! The Privilege and Price of Covenant Relationship by Jo Bailey Wells in Writings on Marriage The Church s Life: Covenantal Relationship from Faith, Hope and Love Session 4 From Marriage to Holy Matrimony by Todd Dill in Writings on Marriage The Church s Challenge: Christian Unity & Biblical Interpretation from Faith, Hope and Love Session 5 The Celebration and Blessing of a Marriage in the Book of Common Prayer (Page 423) The Witness and Blessing of a Lifelong Covenant in Faith, Hope and Love This is only one suggested way to structure your sessions. The point is, these materials give you not only high quality resources to discuss a very important topic, but flexibility in how you decide to engage them. 7 AUGUST 2012 STUDY GUIDE 2
Conversations: Three general approaches are worth noting. The first is to provide opportunity for a study group to connect with what the materials say to their own lives what experiences have you had? The second is similar, with your seeking to learn what resonates with them what particular points made in the essay lead you to say yes! or no! And the third is to help people engage more deeply in theological reflection about their everyday lives in ways that may seem challenging at first recognizing that we grow spiritually, at least in part, when we rub up against different ways of looking at the world. Provide some kind of summary at the end of each session by commending the group for their contribution, and suggesting that the group has engaged in faithful reflection together. Bible passages: Biblical passages are referred to throughout the materials. As part of your preparation, look up these passages and identify their relevance to the topic at hand (why do you think the author(s) refer(s) to this particular passage? How does it strengthen the particular perspective? You do not need to be a Bible scholar to help others read and gain an understanding of these passages; your having studied them will give you familiarity with the content and help you to facilitate the conversation with others as they engage the same. That said; remember there is a broader context to any small set of verses. If you choose to ask the group to read the Bible between sessions, ask them to read entire chapters, or more. You may also want to do some basic secondary research on a passage particularly the Old Testament passages to learn more about the history and setting of the text. Some passages may also be appropriate for a lectio divina exercise. Note that for a lectio divina exercise you should usually pick a short passage rather than work with a long one. This could be one way to get conversation going in a group and often helps people converse at a deeper level than they might otherwise. If you don t know what lectio divina is or how to lead it, a good introduction can be found at this website, http://srsclare.com/practice-of-prayer/lectio-divina/ or in M. Basil Pennington s Lectio Divina: Renewing the Ancient Practice of Praying the Scriptures. 7 AUGUST 2012 STUDY GUIDE 3
A Suggested Format for Each Session In preparation: At least a week before the first session: Announce the sessions in service leaflets, on the church s website, etc. Distribute copies of the resources or let people know where they can retrieve them on the diocesan website: Assign reading(s). Ask people to come prepared to talk about what they have read. Invite someone who will be participating to prepare a brief summary of the materials for each session for those who may not come prepared. The day of the session: Make sure the seating arrangement is conducive for conversation. A circle or U-shaped configuration of comfortable chairs is suggested. No tables are necessary. A session might look like this: Prayer: We encourage you to open and close all sessions in prayer. Beginning with a brief period of silence may also help to transition people from their busy lives to a space of reflective listening and sharing. If your group would be open to the following guidance, encourage people to sit comfortably and take a moment to breathe deeply and be mindful of the presence of God in your midst. Below is a spoken prayer by the Rt. Rev. Steven Charleston. You might wish to use this prayer to end the period of silence or just to open the session with, if you prefer not to use silence. O God, we stand on the border to your Kingdom. We pray that your Holy Spirit will be with us to guide us in our conversation. Grant us an openness to hear you in the words of those around us, and courage to proclaim you in our own words, through the love of your Son, our Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen. Introductions: In some of our congregations or regions, everyone will know everyone, but for many that may not be the case. Newcomers in particular will appreciate a reminder of who folks are. Take a minute or two for basic introductions. If you find more extended introductions appealing, you could ask participants why they were interested in coming today. The plan for this program: Provide an overview of what will happen today. This is simply a courtesy to the group to make it clear how you ll proceed and what to expect. Summary: Invite the individual who was asked to summarize the material for the session to offer it to the group. 7 AUGUST 2012 STUDY GUIDE 4
Conversations: Below are some possible questions to help initiate conversation. These questions are provided as examples - you should feel free to alter them or create new ones, as you deem appropriate. Each group will be different, thus, stimulating conversation requires you to discern where energy lies and to draw out insights from throughout the group. Once the conversation gets going and we believe it will! your task is to keep it focused, and to shift ground when a particular subject seems to have been exhausted. Here are some possible questions for discussion: 1. Reflecting on the reading, what comes up immediately for you? What experiences from your own life does this reflection bring up for you? 2. As you think about the Biblical passages in the materials, do any of them stand out for you? What are they/is God saying to you? 3. How is your thinking challenged by what you have read for today? Are you in touch with what specifically is causing you to feel challenged or uncomfortable? 4. How are you comforted by what you read? What causes you to feel comfortable or supported? 5. What is your understanding of the church s position on this same issue? Do you imagine this position should remain the same or change based on changes from inside/outside the church? If you believe it should remain the same, why? If you believe it should change, why? To what would you change its position? How would you go about making this change? 6. What (new) questions do you have for the group (or to reflect upon individually)? 7. What additional study would you like to pursue around this topic? Wrapping Up: Ask someone to offer a brief reflection on the conversation that has taken place or offer one yourself. Ask participants to pick one area from the day s conversation that they would like to reflect upon during the upcoming week. Thank everyone for their thoughtful and respectful participation. Prior to the closing prayer, if you and your group are comfortable with silence, ask everyone to take a moment to get comfortable, breathe deeply, and reflect on how the Spirit might have spoken to him or her today. In closing, one spoken prayer you might wish to use is also adapted from Good News by Bishop Charleston. It is as follows: Dear God, thank you for the presence of your Holy Spirit in this conversation. We ask that the Spirit will go with us as we leave this place to be your ministers. Give us grace to be healers of what hurts us and heralds of what makes us whole. In the blessed name of Jesus, we pray. Amen. At the beginning of the next session, give people the opportunity to share their reflections from the past session(s) before beginning the conversation on a new one. 7 AUGUST 2012 STUDY GUIDE 5
Final Session: Where do we go from here? In preparation: Ask participants to read the materials assigned for the day. Invite one participant to prepare a summary of the materials. Make sure seating arrangements are as you wish them to be. The final session might look like this: Prayer: See session notes above for a possible text and guidance regarding opening in prayer and silence. Introductions: Although this is the final session you may still have people who are new to the group. Don t forget to do introductions. The plan for this program: Provide an overview of what will happen today. Summary: Invite the individual who was asked to summarize the material for the session to offer it to the group. Conversations: 1. What ideas/thoughts suggested in the materials for this course of study resonated with you as possibilities for you and/or your congregation s life and ministry? 2. What other thoughts and/or ideas did you think of related to this topic? 3. Are there any areas of this issue that you would like to learn more about? If so, what areas? Can you suggest some resources to help you and others learn more? 4. What about your own spiritual and family lives? Would you like to change what or how you view marriage? 5. What is your own theology of marriage? Final summary and closing prayer: See session notes above for a possible text and guidance regarding the closing prayer and period of silent reflection. Blessings to you in this ministry! 7 AUGUST 2012 STUDY GUIDE 6
II. Some suggestions for individual study Obviously, individual study is, well, individual. You have your own way of thinking about and reflecting upon texts. These materials lend themselves to conversation but you may prefer to read and reflect upon them on your own. All of the questions in the two above sections would work well for individual study; reflect upon these questions (and others that may arise for you) and then continue the process of reading and reflecting as you work your way through the materials. You may want to have a Bible and a journal available (or your computer, your blog, etc.) so you can read the scriptural text alongside the essays and write your own thoughts about what you have read. It is certainly helpful to write your thoughts down but you may have other practices that work well for you: use them! Most important in reading this material is to do so thoughtfully and prayerfully. It is helpful to know your biases as you begin reading; our opinions, convictions and beliefs, among other things, inform our interpretation of what we read. Being aware of these biases can help us to be open to new and/or different perspectives. Reading these essays prayerfully helps us to stay open to the presence of the Holy Spirit, a presence that helps us to reflect more deeply on what it means to be in relationship as a part of the body of Christ. Through this reflection, perhaps your spiritual life will be transformed while discovering new ways of engaging in the Church s mission. Blessings to you in this endeavor! 7 AUGUST 2012 STUDY GUIDE 7