break the frame Seven Ways to Spark the Exceptional Leader in You Spark. Empower. Lead.
What are the Questions? The seven questions in this ebook are designed to spark the exceptional leader in you - it is not a test. The questions are a starting point. Most people do not stop and make the time to be intentional about the way they are living or leading. Living through other people s expectations of you will only get you so far. It s like living life on auto-pilot. You ll land somewhere but there is no room for passion, adventure or fresh ideas. I want you to live a life that is far greater than simply getting from point A to point B. These questions will jumpstart your understanding of what you expect, want and dream about for yourself. Those people that stay on auto-pilot? They are the ones that colleagues and team members whisper about in the halls (and trust me, they re not saying good things). If you quickly know the answers to every question posed, I d like to challenge you to think about it for a little while and answer again. See what else you can learn. The actions are there as a starting point for your personal path to transformation. Try one or try all of them! Sequence doesn t matter but attitude does. Coaching & these questions have the same purpose to get you to take a deeper look at who you are, the way you are living, and the way you are leading. Knowing what you want matters and clearly you want a life that is exceptional. 2
1. Why Lead? Many people believe that leaders are born. I believe that people rise to the occasion. Leadership lies within each of us. Circumstances, choices and willingness stand in our way of being great. LEADERS: Have a vision. They see what s possible where others do not. They also have the ability to share that vision with others in a genuine and compelling way. Care deeply about people. Leadership is about developing relationships with people. Leaders influence the bottom line by influencing others. Do what s right. What s right is not always what s popular. Leaders see the path and make it safe for others to travel with them. Acknowledge the contribution of others. Leaders know that they are not successful alone. An authentic thanks that is timely, specific and public can elevate a person s commitment to the team exponentially. Long-term loyalty and drive cannot be bought with dollars but authentic recognition makes a true difference. Identify three defining moments in your life or career. Write them down and capture what made them stand out. Anything in common? What role did you play? If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader. - John Quincy Adams 3
2. What do you contribute that s unique? Unique is such a funny word. Everyone loves to think that they are unique. What does that really mean? Being unique takes courage to break the frame. Being unique takes responsibility for your own creativity and action. Being unique takes vision to think about more than what s in front of you. Being unique creates inspiration even in the mundane because it all matters. Being unique challenges you to have direction and know where you re going. Being unique shines light on your intentions and makes them reality. Being unique is being in touch with what makes you, YOU. Set a timer and make a list of words that define you. Don t stop writing for 5 minutes. Review the list with three trusted advisors ask what s missing? Each of us is a unique strand in the intricate web of life and here to make a contribution. - Deepak Chopra 4
3. What is your leadership legacy? How do you want to be remembered? The person who... Carried the whole organization to success through sheer will Mentored others Could storm in and fix any situation Facilitated solutions across silos like nobody else could Lived at the office Had passions and interests outside of work Embraced a zest for life Followed their dreams Inspired others to do more and be more than they ever imagined Had a genuine passion for the work Made a lot of money Made a lot of friends Made a difference You don t have to pick one. The bottom line is to BE INTENTIONAL. Invite a trusted advisor to lunch. Ask them: 1) How do you see me? 2) How do you think others experience me? 3) What do you believe I value most? The quality of a leader is reflected in the standards they set for themselves. - Ray Kroc 5
4. When was the last time you tried a fresh approach? Freshness changes everything. When we re really, really stuck, it s usually because we only see one way out. Freshness creates new perspectives which in turn creates new opportunity. Trying something fresh doesn t have to be radical. Pick one of these today and see how it frees your mind to find new solutions. Try a new recipe for dinner Drive a different way to work Ask the new person at the office to get coffee Wear the outfit you re saving for a special occasion - tomorrow Go for a run in a totally new place Skip the gym and go play with your kids at the park Your choice! The possibilities are endless Commit to doing two new things this week. Tell someone else what you plan to do. Ask them to hold you accountable for your actions. Creativity is what makes humanity move. We were meant to participate. - Keith Jarrett 6
5. What do you believe in? Beliefs are deeply personal. Leaders in life and work know that their beliefs are what drive them day-to-day. Without knowing what you believe in, you re just going through the motions without any real passion or purpose. Turning up the volume on your beliefs enables you to lead and engage with more confidence and creativity. What you stand for speaks directly to your gut, your heart and your mind every single time you re faced with a decision. What do you believe? What are you most passionate about? What beliefs do you hold so strongly that if forced to give up, you would no longer be who you are today? Take the time to explore what you believe and what you re meant to do and who you re meant to be will become clearer than ever. Take 30 minutes to draft your personal manifesto. It doesn t have to be perfect. Start with I believe and see where it takes you. Honesty and transparency make you vulnerable. Be honest and transparent anyway. Mother Theresa 7
6. Who are your role models? Our role models shape us in all aspects of our lives - as leaders, friends, colleagues, and as human beings. Role models are found in people that we ve worked with, people that we admire from a distance, or even be fictional leaders. The key is each one teaches us something about our personal leadership. Who are your role models? What did they teach you? Consider this: you are a role model to others. Knowing that you influence not only your future but also the future of others, how does that inspire you to change? What qualities does it call on from you that may challenge you? What gifts can you share with others as either a direct mentor or a more distant role model? Living your life in service of your personal leadership will inevitably give you opportunity to influence the path of 1000 s of others. Let that be your call to be the best you you can be. Do you have a mentor? If you do, reach out to them to schedule some time. If you don t, ask yourself who you know that could fill that role and schedule time. Leaders don t create followers, they create more leaders. Tom Peters 8
7. What s missing? It s not only possible but also likely that despite your full life, you feel like something is missing. It could be anything A better role at work? Someone to love? Time with those you care about most? A meaningful intersection of what you love & what you do? Promotion? Hobbies? Passions? Dreams? The most important thing for you to do is to understand what your feeling is telling you. It s pointing you not only towards something that you want to change but it s also shining a light on your values. Values are the guideposts that are in your life. They help you to stand up with integrity, make choices and lead and live with passion and purpose. Feeling an emptiness in a part of your life is an opportunity to work on honoring that value in a much bigger, more meaningful way. Spend 15 minutes alone and meditate on what s missing from your life and what you re most craving. Go deeper and see what it tells you about your values. Emptiness which is conceptually liable to be mistaken for sheer nothingness is in fact the reservoir of infinite possibilities. D.T. Suzuki 9
ARE YOU READY TO BE EXCEPTIONAL? Your history is not your destiny. Alan Cohen 10
What s my story? I ve been in your shoes! Over the past 20 years Eager new consultant, straight out of college, with passion, energy and desire to excel Confident to the point I made some mistakes out of ignorance & pride New Manager of a small team with big things to deliver Innovator that took a risk and tried a completely new approach without any proto-typing Principal of a division responsible for revenue generation & people development Vice President of a large unit with more constraints than I could count After much soul searching about my values, passion, skills and what was most important to me, I realized that coaching leaders in life and at work is my calling. Turned out: I valued relationships with people more than quality time with my spreadsheets Authentic engagement with leaders dedicated to creating a great places to work for themselves and others motivated me to my core Tired of being a cog, I decided it was time to break the frame, take a leadership role in my own life, and BE THE WHEEL I was finally ready for fresh experiences and a new adventure in my own life and at work. After founding Break the Frame, LLC, I moved from my cushy suburb in Washington DC Metro to the Outback of Australia with my husband and children in 2012. Before I left, I got lots of questions from friends, family and strangers like: Do you think you ll like it? What will you do if you hate it? Are you crazy? I couldn t believe their questions! I knew one thing was true: I wasn t moving forward in fear and concern that I d want to turn back to my old way of living. In Australia, I am with people that matter to me, it is a new experience, and I learn something new about personal leadership and about myself every day. Woman of the world, living without boundaries for the first time in a long time. Based in the USA or in Australia I m committed to enjoying the journey. Am I crazy? Not a chance. I made a leap and you can too. 11
The time for YOU is NOW. Let s talk! I want to hear from YOU! www.breaktheframe.com USA: 1 (703) 563 1656 Australia: 61 0468 475 925 alli@breaktheframe.com Skype: AlliPolin Twitter: AlliPolin Spark. Empower. Lead. Identify one small thing that you can do today to move closer to your dream? Do it. Learn from your mistakes and then let them go. Don t beat yourself up about the past. Change the future. Alli Polin 12